Inter-LOAFERS!
By Xenomorph666
Disclaimer: I own only Perfection and Wraith.
DigitalMan and K2 are © My close friend.
Everything else is copyrighted to their correct owner.
Universe: Misfit-Verse
Why the Scions will never teach… Part 2
"All right you little mutants settle down." Ragnis said as he looked at his "class". The Scion of life was being forced to teach the children here something called "Eng. Lit." "Now can anyone tell me what this class is about?"
Wanda didn't even raise her hand. "You're supposed to be teaching us about great English authors and their books and stories."
"Right, you're Perfection's wench, right?" He saw Wanda's eye tick as she went to lunge at him, however; the other goth girl kept her held back. As soon as Ragnis turned his back a large spitball struck him in the head. He turned to see Bobby Drake smiling innocently. "The good news is, you don't have much to learn. There are no good English authors."
"What about ...?" Rogue asked.
"Doesn't matter they suck.." Ragnis yawned.
"What if they're a top seller?." Wanda said.
"Doesn't matter. And I'm teaching here..." After Ragnis finished his first and last little schpeel to his students, he quickly found himself attached to the flag pole with no clothes and no clue as to how he got there. "Some how I knew this was going to happen." The Scion grumbled.
Back in the class Wanda was taking charge. "Ok, we read a book or what ever for the class and talk tomorrow, k?" Everyone nodded in agreement. "Bobby, comic books don't count."
"Aww…" Bobby groaned as an explosion rocked the base from the kitchen.
"Kitty's cooking." Rogue said with out looking up.
"Actually that could easily be, BA's." Wanda said with a blink.
&&&&&&&
In the kitchen it was a mess. Not only was Astral covered head to toe and wing in an unidentified pastry mix, but he had several insane mutant kids flinging the substance around and devouring some supped up mutant crack coffee.
"WHOSE WAS THIS!" He bellowed, all the students looked around confused for a second then pointed at Kitty.
"Like, it was not!" She argued. "I was making bread in that oven!" She pointed to an oven that was flaming. "Oh dear."
"Ah…" Astral never got to finish as the stove was blown off it's hinges and flew at the Scion with surprising speed. It struck him and knocked him out for quite a bit.
BA, noticed this and being one to not let the loss of one teacher stop the learning experiences promptly offered his knowledge. "Who wants to learn how to make my special coffee?" The eyes in the room doubled in size at the prospect.
&&&&&&&
In Mosious' class room the discussion was much more civil as he taught the children about the ancient Mayans. Of course the fact that he had actually summoned a few priests from the past to explain their religion might have had something to do with his success. He had every student's attention. Especially Todd's, the small hunched over mutant was insanely interested in their live human sacrifice.
"Todd, you know some would call this a morbid interest." Tabitha said as she looked at Todd with a scared look.
"I can't help it if Mosious brings up one of the more interesting aspects of the Mayan culture." Todd smiled gleefully.
"You are a sad strange little man." Thornn eyed Todd from behind.
"Eh…" Todd shrugged as he watched Mosious translate how the priests removed the hearts of their volunteers.
Tabitha and Thornn just exchanged uneasy glances.
&&&&&&&
Health class was better left un mentioned as Wraith's idea of informative topics in that range was limited. Most students were in the infirmary by the end of the day. That is all except Arcade who watched Wraith's movies on triage and different ways to die with a disturbed interest.
&&&&&&&
Metal Shop was an almost booming success, or it would have been had DM not attempted the old "cut my hand off with a miter saw" joke. Again most of the students were in the infirmary, of course DM did take the joke an extra step by cutting more fake limbs off…
&&&&&&&
Chemistry had the usual aspects of being taught by mages. Of course no one knew they were making magical potions. And only Trinity finished early and with an extra project.
"So, you've finished your potion?" Maven asked as he rounded near the three girls.
"Yup." Daria said. "Wait potion?"
"Yes, we were mages before we became Scions." Maven nodded. "You just made a basic healing potion. What's that?" Maven asked as he picked up an extra vial with a funny liquid in it.
"It's a type of acid that burns through almost anything. It can also freeze stuff if mixed with the proper bases." Quinn explained.
"Interesting. We should test it out." Maven looked a little evil then, "Alteran, come see this potion."
Alteran walked over quickly to see the Triplet's potion. He was slightly confused. "What is it?"
"I don't know why don't you try it out." Maven said with a gleam.
"Well seeing as how you didn't make it… Ok." Alteran said as he downed the strange liquid. "Mmm, minty." He said with a smile, then noticed his brother was staring at his feet. Alteran looked down to see that he was literally bones below the stomach. "Note to self, never trust me twin."
&&&&&&
Physical Education was something that Althea had been looking forward to. Especially when she found out that Angelica was in it too. Then she found out it was a swimming class. Her heart soared.
"All right class." Karma said as she came out in a strictly bland one piece. "Today is WATER VOLLEYBALL DAY!" Karma said as she tossed a volleyball into the water and made a net for it.
"Um, I don't think it would be wise for me to go in the water and use my powers." Angelica said as she noticed several of the others using their powers.
"Then you can keep score and ref!" Karma said with much gusto. "Just like Wraithy-poo used too…" Two hearts with Wraith's head in the middle formed in her eyes as she poured a cup of coffee that Althea immediately recognized.
"We're doomed." Angelica said as she realized what was going on.
&&&&&&&&
Perfection's art class, ironically was the sanest class the base had ever known. Except for the fact that Perfection was dressed like a French painter with a cheesy mustache and even cheesier accent.
"And now we see zhat zhe zelf-portrait is truly unique." Perfection said as he finished his self portrait. It was of him holding a rose with Wanda on it. He then went around an judged everyone's portrait.
"No, I will not add you!" Lance said to no one. As Perfection came around, he noticed that Lance's picture had room for another face.
"Zelf-portrait Lunce, zelf as in you and how you zee youzelf!" Perfection said as he mashed lances cheeks together.
"I can't help it if I see an imaginary coyote from time to time." Lance growled.
"Zeen peint 'im!" Perfection said as he walked away.
"Al right, fine!" Lance said as he began to add a coyote to the picture.
Then Perfection came over to Xi, his picture was exactly like a mirror. Infact Perfection did a double take. "Pearfect!" He exclaimed as he went on to Fred.
"Eh, Frederick, I zink perhaps, peinting and not eating would 'elp you grade, yes?" Perfection asked.
"Oh, oops, I got hungry." Fred said with a blush.
"Yes, well just do you best, yes?" Perfection then went to Pietro and walked right past the speedster as Pietro finished his thirty fifth nude self portrait.
"Can I have a privacy wall?" Jamie asked several of his copies to block off his sight of Pietro. Jamie was using one of the copies as a model and doing quite good.
Next came Lina, she wasn't even painting. She was just lightly crying, Perfection morphed to his normal self. "So… need some help?" He asked.
"Why do I have to do a self portrait?" she asked, she was obviously self conscious of her appearance.
"Let me ask you something: When you close your eyes, what is it you see?" Perfection smiled.
"I dunno. Me." She said with a sniffle.
"Then paint that, what you see in your heart is much more interesting that a mirror image." Perfection pointed to Xi and Jaime's paintings, "Or… being to realistic…" Perfection eyed Pietro's growing pile warily. "See, even Lance and Fred are doing better than those three."
Lance was just starting a new picture of him strangling the coyote like Homer Simpson does to his son. "Make me stop!" He shouted as everyone ignored him.
Fred was painting himself, but he kept a small spot open and he kept looking at Lina as he added a second face.
"So don't worry about the surface. Just paint what's in here." Perfection said as Lina nodded and began to paint several bright colors onto the canvas.
"HEY LOOK!" Pietro said as he pointed to the flag pole outside where Ragnis was hanging.
"Change of plan students!" Perfection warped his look to a twenties director. "Film time!" Pietro immediately went for his camcorder.
"With pleasure…" Pietro cackled as they went outside.
Lina stayed behind though and finished her picture. It wasn't really a self portrait like the others were. Instead it was a small figure of Lina, with the smaller figures of the JOEs an the X-Men filling It up. She smiled at as she went outside to join the others in torturing the captured Scion.
