Clarisse was still a bit unsure about if playing tricks on people was a good thing to do and she didn't understand why she was willing to spend so much time with this man she had just met. There was something about him. He seemed to have a way of making her understand the benefits of doing things. In this case, the benefits were hours of laughter.
They started in the main entrance of the palace, gluing the phone to the hook while to guard was off to lunch. When they were done, they hid behind the corner and waited for it to ring. After a short time, the guard came back to his chair and started reading the newspaper. It wasn't long before the phone rang. He picked it and realised that the whole base of the phone came with it. He proceeded to hold it up in mid-air for observation. Joseph was smiling. Clarisse looked as if she was going to burst into hysterics. He grabbed her around the mouth and led her away, so the guard wouldn't hear.
"Ahahaha, oh my! That was terribly funny. Did you see the way he looked at the it? Haha. Oh dear."
"You see, that was fun, right?"
"Oh yes, it was very fun. What's next on the agenda?"
He held up a carton of eggs, "We're going to the golf course."
She laughed some more as they headed towards the limousine.
The two kneeled behind a bush and observed the golfers.
Clarisse had the biggest smile on her face. The anticipation was too much, "So what you going to do to them?"
"Well, you are going to distract that golfer over there while I replace his golf ball with an egg."
She stopped smiling and turned to him, "Me?"
"Yes."
"But how?"
"I'm sure you'll think of a way."
"But…"
He got up and motioned for her to talk to the golfer.
"What do I say?"
"Anything. I just need you to keep him busy for about ten seconds."
He pushed her out into the open field. She brushed the twigs and leaves off her freshly ironed, long dress and started walking towards the golfer and looking back to see what Joseph was doing. He was getting ready and waving her to keep walking.
"Excuse me, sir?"
"Oh! Your Majesty, to what do I owe this honour?"
The man kissed her hand while Joseph snuck up and replaced the ball.
"I was just wondering…did you…see…a ball…pass by?"
"A golf ball? Sorry Ma'am, I haven't seen one."
"Oh, bother."
"Here, take one of mine."
"Oh, how kind, thankyou. Goodbye golfing person."
She ran behind the bush to meet up with Joseph.
"You did very well."
"Thankyou Joseph. What happens now?"
"Just watch."
The golfer took a few practise swings before actually connecting with the phoney ball.
He was in shock, "What in the world?"
Clarisse was rolling around the ground at the sight of the poor man drenched in egg-yolk. Joseph was smiling at her. He was used to watching golfers hit eggs instead of balls, so the thrill had worn off. He just liked the idea that he had caused her sudden burst of happiness.
She got up and smiled at him, "Haha, that poor man..."
They walked around and did the same thing to three more people. Then they were caught. One of the men saw Joseph putting the egg on the tee, so he jumped up, grabbed Clarisse's hand and made a run for it.
She tried to speak while at the same time, tried to keep up with him, "Can you believe we were caught?"
"That has never happened before," he laughed.
"Oh well, we obtained some golf balls from our journey."
They ran all the way to the limo and jumped in as quickly as they could.
Throughout the week, they played lots of little tricks including nailing doors shut so nobody could open them, making prank phone calls, putting cars up on bricks so they couldn't move, replacing fountain cleaners with bubble bath and taking air horns to football matches. It was all well and good for her, but Joseph had seen it all before and wanted to do something really big. Something the whole town could "enjoy."
He and Clarisse had been getting along very well over the past week and She seemed to trust him now. She had even came up with ideas every now and then. It was as if being with him had boosted her confidence. Joseph decided to discuss his "major" plan with her.
"Madam, I have come up with perhaps the simplest but best plan ever."
"Would you care to share it with me?"
"Of course. As you know, tomorrow is market day. And as you know, there will be a lot of people there."
"What are you saying?"
"How do you feel about letting some pigs run wild?"
"Oh, Joseph, I don't think that's a very good idea. It might cause chaos."
"That's entirely the point."
"I see, but where are we going find these pig and how will we release them without being caught?"
"They have pigs there, all we have to do is open the gate to the pen."
"But someone is bound to notice."
"No, I checked. The pigpen isn't very well guarded. Just one woman. All we have to do is ask her if we can see them up close. I'll tell you the details on the way there tomorrow. So are you in?"
She reluctantly shook his hand, "I'm in."
They smiled at each and then headed off to bed.
The next day, they got up bright and early and headed off to market. They walked around staying near, but not too near to each other. Many people stopped and stared at her wondering what she was doing in the marketplace. She smiled at them all and headed towards the animal section. Joseph spied the pigpen and led Clarisse over to it. She began to speak to the lady in-charge.
"Good morning, ham-carer."
"Oh! Good morning, Your Majesty. How can I help you?"
"I have come to take a close look at your fine animals. May I?"
The lady nodded her head while Clarisse opened the gate wide.
"Oh dear! I'm so sorry, how clumsy of me," she lied.
The pigs started running all over the market. They were knocking people over, causing people to drop their things and they made everyone start complaining. Joseph had the biggest smile on his face as he watched the lady chase after the pigs. He took Clarisse's hand and ran into the crowd so they could get a better view. It was a happy time, watching people get upset over a few measly pigs. They stopped in front of a fire hydrant and looked at each other, laughing as they watched the people chase after the pigs.
In all the confusion, the fire hydrant was somehow knocked over and water was spraying the whole area. The two were getting soaked, so they decided to make their way out to a dry spot. They ran hand-in-hand to a patch of dry grass. Joseph lay down and because he forgot that she was holding his hand, his forced caused her to fall on top of him. There was confusion. Their bodies were pressed together and their faces were only inches apart. Joseph was wondering whether or not he should say something. He was feeling very awkward, being the one underneath, so he waited for her to make a move. She was stared into his eyes and parted her lips. She then placed them gently onto his. He was frozen solid; what she really doing this? Did she like him or something? There was only one way to find out. He broke the kiss.
"Madam, is there something you would like to share with the group?"
"Oh, dear. I'm sorry, I didn't realise what I was doing," she explained while brushing herself off, "I think we should probably get ourselves changed out of these wet clothes."
"I agree."
"You're not going to tell anyone are you?"
"Of course not."
"Thankyou. I just hope nobody saw us."
They made their way towards the parked limousine and got in. There was awkward silence before she started to apologise again.
"I am sorry about…kissing you. It was totally inappropriate and I feel terrible for putting you in that position. It won't happen again, I promise."
"Madam, I must make it clear to you that I am not upset, I feel quite flattered and that if it is to happen again, I will take it upon myself to make the first move."
She raised her eyebrows and said to him in a calm voice, "We'll just have to see about that!"
More silence was present in the vehicle.
"So what does this mean? Can I expect this to become a regular thing?"
"You can only expect the unexpected."
"And it was unexpected so what you're saying is that I can expect it."
She smiled, "Perhaps."
