Ghosts

Chapter 4

The moon was throwing shadows into J.R.'s bedroom as he lay on his side, his head resting on his pillow. He couldn't take his eyes of the woman sleeping next to him. Sue Ellen had come back into his life, and back into his bed. He was as happy as he had ever been. No, happy doesn't do what he was feeling justice; delirious was a much more suitable word, he thought. Finally, he closed his eyes and joined her in sleep. They stayed that way, locked in an embrace as the minutes ticked by on the clock next to his bed.

Sue Ellen slowly opened her eyes and smiled as she looked at J.R. Had she been dreaming? Did the events of the past couple of hours actually happen? She reached across the bed and ran her hand through J.R.'s hair, gently, in an effort not to disturb his slumber. She was amazed to discover him smiling, as he slept. She started to think that maybe, she had made a poor decision by accepting his offer to stay at Southfork. She was troubled when she thought she had made a mistake by giving in to the passion that had consumed them hours earlier. She turned to get out of his bed and return to her room. Reaching out, he touched her arm. "Sue Ellen, please stay?" he asked. "This feels so right, there's no way in hell it could be wrong." "You read me so well, J.R.," she said. He pulled her to him, once again igniting their flames.

Saturday mornings at Southfork were John Ross' favorite. He could hardly contain himself as he dressed and went downstairs to breakfast. The Ewing's often dined outside in the summer. J.R. and Sue Ellen were already seated at the patio table when John Ross found them. They were sitting next to each other, both of them nursing their coffee. He said, "Mornin' Mamma," hugging and kissing Sue Ellen. "Mornin' Dad." "Mornin', John Ross." "Did you have fun with your Uncle Bobby and Christopher, last night?" J.R asked. "I sure did, the three of us had a race and I came in first place," John Ross replied. Coyly, John Ross asked, "Did you guys have a good night, last night?" Sue Ellen reached her foot under the table and brushed it against J.R.'s leg. J.R smiled at her knowingly, and said, "Yeah, we had a real nice conversation." The look of excitement on John Ross' face abruptly changed to one of disappointment, as his hopes for his Mamma and Daddy reconciling, the way a "husband and wife" would, dissolved with what his Daddy had said. Bobby and Christopher came outside to join the family. Bobby said, "Good Morning." "Good Mornin' Bob, Christopher," said J.R. Sue Ellen smiled at them and said, "Good Morning."

J.R and Sue Ellen sat in silence, not daring to speak, not wanting to give anything away about their night together. Bobby spoke, "Christopher and I are going into town for a while. Did you need a ride to soccer practice, John Ross?" "Omigosh, I completely forgot," said John Ross. "I'll hurry and change." John Ross raced into the house. When he returned; Bobby, Christopher and John Ross drove away in Bobby's car, leaving J.R and Sue Ellen alone, once more. J.R reached across the table and touched Sue Ellen's hand. This touch of her skin against his own felt so good, he thought. Please, God, don't let me do anything that might ruin this, he silently solicited. Sue Ellen asked, "J.R. What are you thinking?" "About last night…" came his reply. They finished their coffee and went inside the house. As they walked upstairs, Sue Ellen asked, "Did you have any plans for today, J.R.?" He had settled his hand at the small of her back, resting it there as they walked. He reveled in how wonderful he felt having Sue Ellen was back in his life, for now, at least. "I was thinking about going for a drive to Lake o' the Pines, would you care to join me?" he said. "That sounds lovely, give me just a minute to change my clothes?" She said, with a hint of a British accent . They walked upstairs to change into something more suitable for a drive to the lake. J.R. dropped his hand away long enough to allow for her to go into her room to change clothes.

J.R went into his room, excited by how wonderful he felt knowing Sue Ellen was so near. J.R. has been with countless women before, during and after his marriage to Sue Ellen ended, but he inevitably desired to be with Sue Ellen. She knew him so well, he thought. It frightened him and thrilled him all at once. He vowed to himself not to repeat past mistakes. When their life together was going better than he could handle, his insecurities always stood in the way of his better judgment, causing him to wander outside of their relationship. He remembered when they were first married; her Mamma, Patricia Shepard had raised Sue Ellen to be a 'proper' Texas wife. Emotions and passions were not acceptable attributes a "woman of distinction" should display, much less possess. J.R. wanted to explore and live out every sexual fantasy he had ever had with Sue Ellen, but he was so afraid of spoiling her that invariably held back. The only time he dared act out his urges was when he was jealous at the thought of her with another man, or after they had been arguing. Closing his eyes, as he envisioned some of their more passionate interludes. Ultimately, J.R. sought fulfillment for his sexual appetites in the arms of other women, even prostitutes. Realizing too late, that none of those women would ever truly satisfy him. They could never make him feel complete. They would never be his emotional and physical equal. Sue Ellen made him feel whole; he never felt more alive than when they were together.

Sue Ellen knocked on his door when she was ready to join him. J.R opened his door and once again, found himself in awe of how she could make a simple, white sweater and jeans look so exceptionally stylish. She had class, that was certain. She had impeccable taste, and it was one of the things J.R admired most about her. She wore her hair down, allowing it to loosely wave about her face. J.R. loved her hair that way. He had discovered a newfound appreciation for everything about Sue Ellen. He wanted to pick her up and carry her to his bed for another lovemaking session, but he resisted.

J.R. and Sue Ellen spent the entire day talking, and walking around the lake. Sue Ellen remembered a time when J.R was more interested in drilling sites than sightseeing. Holding her hand as they walked, he was more attentive to Sue Ellen than ever before. He savored every second of their time together. He asked her, "What did you miss most about the life you left behind, Sue Ellen?" She stopped, turning to face him as she spoke, "Dallas or London?" "Well, both I guess, mostly Texas" he said. "I missed Texas breezes, John Ross, the entire family." She continued, "Warm nights, the Dallas skyline…" Her voice trailing off as J.R once again grasped her in his embrace. J.R. searched her expression for the slightest indication that she might have missed him, too. His answer arrived in the form of an intense kiss. Sue Ellen was full of surprises. He laughed aloud as he realized, once and for all, that he truly loved the woman he held tightly in his arms.

The vivacious colors of the sunset blending with the outline of the pine trees surrounding the lake were the perfect backdrop for the afternoon J.R and Sue Ellen had spent together. The late hour reminded both J.R and Sue Ellen that they hadn't eaten anything all day. It didn't seem to matter to either of them. They decided to head back to Southfork, before their absence gave John Ross cause for concern. J.R put the top up on his convertible as they made the long drive home. He didn't want Sue Ellen to feel cold, nor did he want to miss hearing anything she might say. They sat as close together as the console in his car would permit. He had his hand over her knee. She rested her head against his shoulder as they drove.

Sue Ellen inhaled, enjoying the scent of J.R.'s cologne. She closed her eyes as she leaned her head against his shoulder. Her thoughts interrupted by visions of her ex-husband, Don Lockwood. She remembered the last time she had seen Don, before she left London. He stood, emotionless, in the doorway of the house they had shared. She wanted their marriage to succeed. She need for it to work, if for no other reason than to prove to herself that the reasons for the dissolution of her first, and second marriage to J.R. were not entirely her fault. Stop it, dammit, she thought. Sue Ellen shook her head in an effort to rid her mind of the scenario it was playing for her.

J.R. tightened his grip on her leg as he felt her pulling away. "Is everything all right, Sue Ellen?" he asked. She answered, "No, but it will be." Sensing the change in her demeanor, J.R. slowed the car down in an effort to see if Sue Ellen was upset with him. He searched the road for the next opportunity to pull over and stop. Turning off the engine, J.R. asked, "What's wrong, Darlin'?" He had his hand in her hair, hoping that she would turn to face him. "I'm sorry, J.R.," she said. "I suppose I'm still feeling sluggish from the flight." "I don't think that's what's botherin' you, Sue Ellen," J.R responded. "How would you Bloody know?" She spat at him, irritated not at him, but at what she had been thinking about. Suddenly, she felt remorse for the expletive and how harshly she had reacted to J.R.'s concern for her.

The lights from the instrument panel reflected the look of pain on J.R.'s face. Sue Ellen turned to face J.R., she knew how sensitive he was. J.R Ewing was tough but, the little boy in him was easily hurt, especially by Sue Ellen. She said in a barely audible voice, "Oh, J.R. I am so sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you." She went on, "You were right, I 'm not feeling exhausted from my trip...I'm angry with myself for thinking about Don." J.R. wondered why the hell she would think about that man after the time they had spent together, then, he unselfishly grumbled, "Well, you were married to the man for six years, I suppose that warrants a thought or two."

Sue Ellen smiled at J.R. She was amused by what he'd said. She thought, sometimes J.R. could be so understanding, when he wanted to be. "I don't want to make you uncomfortable, Sue Ellen," J.R said. "I'm willing to listen if you want to talk." "Talking is the last thing on my mind right now," she said as she leaned in to kiss his lips. Her mouth moved against his. Gently at first, then increasing in depth. J.R. returned her fervor, aching with a need to feel her skin next to his own. His hands lifting her sweater, as he kissed her, seeking the flesh of her back. She was so soft, so soft. J.R caught his breath as Sue Ellen undid the first button on his pale blue shirt. She kissed his cheek, her lips traveling down his neck. Her fingers tracing the path being led by her mouth. J.R. whispered against her hair, "Darlin' we'd better continue this back at the house, or I'll be forced to make love to you by the side of the road." Sue Ellen whispered huskily , "Drive, J.R." J.R. hurriedly started the engine, not wanting to waste anymore time . He needed her to finish what she had started.

John Ross had been volleying between pacing the distance around the patio and sitting at the table, nervously tapping his fingers. He anxiously awaited the return of his Mamma and Daddy. He had visions of what happened between them after he left for soccer practice. He prayed that they didn't argue. John Ross had one thing on his agenda – the reunion of his parents. If they were to remarry, that would even be better. He loved and respected both of his parents. Alone, they each had traits he admired. He was wise enough and mature enough to know that together, his parents were formidable. The very thought of them together, however briefly, brought a smile to his face.

John Ross practically jumped out of his chair when he recognized his Daddy's car approaching the drive. The car stopped in the driveway and J.R turned off the engine. John Ross ran around to the passenger side to open the door for his Mamma. "Good evening sweetheart," Sue Ellen said, hugging him to her side. "How was soccer practice?" John Ross said, "Our whole soccer team will be going to the state playoffs, if we win our next game." "Wonderful, Son," said J.R. "That's just wonderful." J.R. ruffled the hair on his son's head as the three of them went inside the house. Sue Ellen looked at J.R., her eyes ablaze with her desire for him. J.R told John Ross that he'd better get to bed, it was getting late. John Ross said, "Goodnight, I love you." He kissed them both and walked upstairs.

Sue Ellen saw the look on J.R.'s face and knew what she had to do next. They were in his room in an instant. J.R. ripped his shirt as he threw it on the floor. He pulled Sue Ellen's sweater over her head and kissed her, tossing the garment aside. She backed up as she climbed onto his bed. J.R had never known Sue Ellen to be so wanton. Her appetite for him was insatiable, as she pulled him on top of her. Their bodies intertwined in an ageless rhythm. The crescendo of their abandon left them exhausted. J.R. broke the silence and said, "My God, Sue Ellen. I don't know what's gotten into to you to bring about this change, but don't let it end...Please, don't let it end." Sue Ellen laughed and said, "You've gotten into me, J.R." She smiled wickedly at him, with half-closed eyes.

J.R. grinned and kissed her mouth.