A/N: thank you for your reviews. sorry it took so long, having dating problems, had to fiddle with a few things. also, sorry for forgetting to adjust the chart for chapter 14, if i have time, i'll fix that now.

chapter 1 - chapter 5.2 - chapter 4.1 - chapter 3.1 - chapter 6.1 - chapter 14.1 - chapter 5.1 - chapter 10 - chapter 11.2 - chaper 13.2 - chapter 2 - chapter 4.2 - chapter 3.2 - chapter 4.3 - chapter 7 - chapter 9.1 - chapter 6.2 - chapter 9.3 - chapter 11.1 - chapter 8.2 - chapter 14.2 - chapter 15.3 - chapter 12.2 - chapter 15.2 - chapter 16 - chapter 9.2 - chapter 12.1 - chapter 15.1 - chapter 13.3 - chapter 8.1 - chapter 13.1 - chapter 8.3 -

April 20 - 1998 - Seventh Year -

"Ronald Weasley, if you don't tell me what's wrong, I am going to hex you and Harry so badly they'll be working on transfiguring you back to your original state a week later!" Hermione yelled as I sat down for lunch the Saturday after our fight. We were late so hardly anyone was still eating and only a few second-years sat at the opposite end of our table. Harry was 'in a meeting with Dumbledore', which actually meant he was sulking in the pool of the prefect's bathroom. I would have to remember to ask Dumbledore to change the password so the bastard was denied access. Hermione pulled my plate away from me with a look of determined anger.

I sighed and rubbed my temples, "'Mione, you don't want to know, trust me. It's private."

"Private! From me! I'm your best friend right now, Ron! Harry won't even look at you! What did you do!" She was yelling so loudly that the first-years at the Ravenclaw table were staring at us, let alone our own second-years. I glared at them and threatened house points if they didn't mind their own bloody business, and then turned back to Hermione.

"I didn't do anything, at least not to Harry. If you'll give me my food back, I'll tell you what's wrong." It was time she knew, no matter how badly I wanted to keep her from it. I'd rather have her hear it from me than an infuriated Harry. She relaxed a bit and put the plate back in front of me. We began to eat again. "Promise no matter what I say, you won't yell? You can hate me all you want, but you can't yell. I don't want this getting around school."

"I won't yell, Ronald. Now tell me."

I hesitated for a second, sighed, and went on with it, making sure my voice was low enough to not be overheard, "I've been sleeping with Draco Malfoy for over a year."

She just stared at me for the longest time, but then her eyes narrowed. "What you do mean you've been sleeping with Draco Malfoy for a year? He's a fowl, disgusting, little ferret. How could you even let him touch you?"

I looked away from her and shoved a sandwich in my mouth. "I can't really explain it. I just… Look, I know he's a horrible person and he's treated us terribly our whole school lives, and I usually want to kill him myself, but… I don't know. When I'm with him and we're alone, it's like I'm home. I feel safe and needed and wanted and it's like nothing I've ever felt before."

"But it's Malfoy! And you could you not have told me?"

"I didn't want you to hate me or stop talking to me."

"But you told Harry!"

"No! Harry found out all by himself. He walked down the wrong hallway and caught us."

She didn't say anything for a long while, chewing her food thoughtfully. "Well, at least you told me of your own free will. Too bad I already knew." She fixed a glare at me and I dropped my fork in shock.

"What? How could you possibly have known?"

She rolled her eyes at me. "Honestly, Ron. You, Harry, and Malfoy all missing from class? I watched you go behind Hagrid's. Like I was going to let you two get hexed to death without trying to stop it. I waited to see what you were talking about and when I heard, I stayed hidden to find out what was going on."

"Oh… So you er… You heard the whole thing, then?" I bit my lip and didn't look at her, but I could feel her eyes on me.

"He put you under the Imperius Curse, Ron. How could you be okay with that?" Her voice was soft and almost pitying.

"I know he shouldn't have done it. I yelled at him as soon as it was off, believe me. But I don't now, 'Mione. I have a hard time getting angry with him for those things. He's from a different world than we are. He used to talk sometimes after we were… together. He'd tell me things about his family and the Deatheaters."

"Like what?"

"After he got the Dark Mark, when he'd go to meetings, he'd tell me sometimes about his father or Snape or even him getting the Cruciatus Curse for doing something wrong. He talked about it like it was nothing, like everyone does the same thing when they're angry. It kind of made me feel bad for him almost. I don't know…"

"But how does that make what he did alright?"

"I can't explain it. It's not right, necessarily, but it's something that's ingrained in him. I can't exactly tell him to stop, especially since he's still under the influence of Lucius and Vold-Vol-You-Know- Who. And it's not like I've ever had any control over his actions whatsoever. Besides, it isn't as though he used it to force himself on me. It was the only way he knew how to get me to our room. He took it off as soon as we were both there. And even more, it's kind of a good thing that he did it because I wasn't about to go with him, and quite frankly, he gave me the most mind-shatteringly amazing orgasm of my life. And he cuddled afterwards. We slept on the couch together until… what? Midnight? Is that when I came back to the Common Room?"

"Good sex justifies total loss of bodily control to someone who would sooner kill you than look at you?"

"No, he would never kill me."

"How do you know?"

"I just do, okay? Look, are you going to be like Harry and end our friendship because I made a choice you don't like or can we drop this?"

"What are you talking about? Harry didn't end your friendship, he's just upset."

"No, it's over. I tried to talk to him about it, but he told me he couldn't accept it and walked off. I don't know what to do now." I felt tears sting my eyes for the second time in three days and looked down at my plate only to discover that I had lost my appetite and shoved it away. "Please don't be like him. I couldn't handle it if I lost the both of you."

I heard her sigh and then she wrapped her arms around me and pulled me into hug. I buried my nose in her neck and fought my tears. "You aren't going to lose me, I'm just upset. I don't understand what would possess you to want to be with someone that hurts you."

"People do a lot of stupid things for love." She remained quiet as she rubbed my back. "I'm sorry I never told you. I was afraid I might hurt you, especially with the whole thing with the entire student body and half the teachers thinking I was in love with you. I should have told you when I told Harry."

"I thought he just found out?"

"About Draco, yeah, but I told him I was gay after Christmas holidays last year. I should have told you, too. It wasn't fair to leave you in the dark like that." I straightened so that I could look her in the eye and she gave me a pensive look.

"It's alright. You were trying to protect me. I can't hate you for that."

"So you aren't mad?"

"Oh, I'm plenty mad, but mostly at Malfoy." I nodded. I couldn't really stop her from hating him, and she had many reasons beyond me. I was just happy to know that I wasn't losing both my best friends. "Do you want to go to the library to study for a while with me? I think Professor Flitwick is going to give us another quiz on Monday." Not having anything else to do, I agreed and we went to get our bags from the dorms before heading down to the library. If anything else, I could just read about Quidditch.

The library was almost empty when we arrived, only a few Hufflepuff fourth-years huddled at a table in the back, giggling about something. We chose a table at the other side of the library and Hermione went to find a few books. I was fiddling with a quill and thinking about Harry when the doors opened and in walked Draco with Crabbe, Goyle, and Blaise Zabini. Our eyes met for a second before he sat with his group a few tables away. Hermione came back with a stack of books, looking apprehensively over at their table. "No Parkinson? I'm surprised. She usually follows him around like a lost puppy."

I smirked and took one of the books from her stack. "He's been avoiding her since we got back together. I think he's worried I'll cut him off again."

"Cut him off?"

"We weren't together after he started all that public stuff with her. I told him he couldn't touch me if he was with anyone else. It took him a while, but I think he's finally realized that I wasn't bluffing."

"How do you know he's not sleeping around secretly?"

"He doesn't have time. He's been with me every night this week." Her eyes turned to saucers and she grabbed a book.

"More than I really ever needed to know, Ron."

"Sorry." We settled into a silent reading for a while. I was reading about the benefits of a certain wand movement, but quickly got bored. My eyes wandered over to Draco and I was surprised to see him looking back at me. He glanced to a back alcove and back to me before saying something to his group and heading in the direction he'd indicated. I waited about a minute, told Hermione I'd be back, and followed him. He was absently thumbing through an old tome, but put it back as his eyes flicked to me.

"Out with Granger? Study date?"

I rolled my eyes and walked up to him, "Damage control. She insisted I tell her why Harry and I aren't speaking."

"You told her?" His eyes narrowed and his voice was dangerously low.

"I had no choice. She knew anyway. She overheard the other day during class. She isn't happy with you."

"Am I supposed to give a fuck? They're your friends, not mine. As long as she doesn't tell anyone…" His hand reached up to twist around my tie.

"She won't."

A slow smirk emerged on his lips and he pulled my tie (and subsequently me) to him. "Good." And then our lips met and I forgot about everything but him for the time being. I came back to the table ten minutes later looking thoroughly snogged, I'm sure, but Hermione only raised an eyebrow at me before turning back to her book.