x
"Ellie, you've gotta tell her some time," Paige said, sighing and squeezing her girlfriend's thigh.
"Look, Paige, I'll tell her when I'm ready, okay?" Ellie muttered, scratching her wrist. "Now kiss me, you fool," she demanded, laughing as the blonde leaned into her.
"Love you," Paige whispered, laying down on Ellie's bed.
Ellie nodded, positioning herself next to Paige. "You too."
x
Paige sat up. "Well, sweetie, I really have to go," she whispered, kissing Ellie's neck.
"Don't go," Ellie muttered sleepily, wrapping her fingers around Paige's wrist. "Please, Waigey, don't leave."
"I have to, Elle. I'll be back later, okay? I'll see you tomorrow." As Paige got off the bed, a tear slipped down Ellie's cheek.
"I love you, Paige," Ellie whispered.
x
Ellie's POV
"Sean!" I called, running across the hall to talk to him. "Sean, please, wait up!" I yelled.
He brushed me off and kept walking.
"Asshole!" I cried, tossing a braid over my shoulder.
"Who?" Ashley asked, coming up behind me.
"Nobody," I grumbled.
Ashley nodded. "Oh, Elle, guess what happened yesterday!"
Ellie yawned. "I don't know. Tell me."
"Okay, so I was sitting at the computer, just IMing a few people..." I blocked her droning out of my head. How shallow could you get?
"...and then guess who IMed me? Sean! We talked for a few hours, and then he asked me out! I said yes!"
"What?" I cried. "What the hell is wrong with you? God, Ashley, you're so fucking shallow!" I screamed.
"Ellie, if you don't like it - " Ashley started.
"No. Just no. I'm Ashley, you were my best friend! But now...now... I don't know what I'm supposed to do with you! You don't even act like my friend anymore. So...now that you go out with my ex, am I allowed to fuck Craig?" I yelled.
"Ellie, I'd like to talk with you," Ms. Suave said, smiling expectantly at me. She didn't realize what she had just stopped from happening: me hitting Ashley.
"I'm a bit busy at the moment," I mumbled.
Ash looked like she would cry. "No, Ms. Suave, we're done. Don't worry about what I said earlier. She obviously doesn't care that she's killing herself. I'm sorry for troubling you, Ellie. Thanks for listening to my concerns, Ms. Suave." As Ashley ran away, crying, I bore a hole into her back with my eyes, all the while giving her the finger by my side.
"Have a good day, Ms. Suave," I said cheerily, veering into the girls' washroom.
I steadied myself against the bathroom counter, thinking. I dropped my bag into the sink, and it spilled open. There sat my razorblade in all its glory. No, no, I can't.
I reached for it, my hand shaking. I hadn't cut since before I got chucked into the looney bin. I rolled down my armwarmer and pushed up my sleeve. No scars...What the fuck? Oh yeah, scar removal. I sighed, pressing the blade to my arm. I pulled it across as quickly as I could, blood blossoming. The beads of blood were beautiful. They expanded and dropped from my arm into the sink. "Oh shit," I muttered, turning on the faucet and reaching for a paper towel. I pressed the paper towel to my wound, biting my lip.
x
Paige's POV
I entered the girls' bathroom, looking for Ellie. Nope, there was nobody there. I went over to the counter to gloss my lips, and when I looked down there was blood in the sink.
I swallowed and tried to ignore it. What if it was Ellie? What if she cut? What if I never find out? Oh god, oh god...
x
"Ellie!" I called, jogging over to her as she walked home. "It's cold. Come on, get a ride from Dylan. He's being nice and coming all the way from the university to bring me home." I grabbed her forearm.
She winced. "No, I'd rather walk, thanks," Ellie replied, smiling faintly.
"Elle, are you okay?" I whispered.
"Yeah, I'm peachy."
"I love you, Ellie. So don't hurt yourself," I said, jogging back to Dylan's car.
"Waigey," Dylan started.
"Dylan."
"Paige, what's so special about that girl? She looks so hurt; so broken." Dylan shook his head.
"She is," I muttered, dropping my hands to my lap. "But I'm helping her."
"Ellie's so skinny," Dylan whispered, moving one hand from the steering wheel to the radio.
"She has an eating disorder," I blurted out. "Oh, shit."
Dylan smirked. "I'm not going to tell anyone, Paige."
"Okay...she cuts and does drugs and is suicidal and I love her and if she dies I think I'll die too," I cried in all one breath.
He shook his head again. "Does her mom know?" he asked.
"Yeah. A couple weeks ago she got put in a mental hospital, but she hated it so her mom took her out," I started. "And then, the day after she got back, I went to her house and found her puking her guts out over the toilet bowl." I let the message sink in. "And she was puking on purpose."
x
Okay. Paige, Paige, Paige. What are we going to do with you? Pfft... Much love,
Zoe
