A/N: Ok, last chapter, guys. Thanks a lot to everyone who has stuck with me through it all despite the fact that I'm so bad at updating, and special thanks to Courtney242, Tanguay18, Billy4Me and brainfear, who all reviewed the last chapter.:) You guys are the greatest. I think this chapter is a pretty good end to the story, hope everyone else likes it too. Oh, and the song is On The Way Down, by Ryan Cabrera, and I don't own it.

Chapter 16: The Way You Loved Me

"Sara, I really don't want to do this."

Glancing at her companion, Sara rolled her eyes. "Yes, Grissom, I know. You've told me about a million times in the past day."

"Technically, I've only said it about ten times; you wouldn't know the correct number because you weren't listening. You still aren't listening. I really don't want to do this."

"And that makes it eleven times," Sara informed him as she pulled into a free parking spot. There was a long moment of silence then as they sat, Sara waiting for Grissom to take initiative and exit the vehicle and Grissom waiting for Sara to get out so he would have the courage to do so as well. After Nick's visit, his week off had passed quickly. Catherine had come over on one occasion, to see how he was doing, and Warrick had stopped by once as well, but neither of them had stayed very long, for which Grissom was grateful. He wasn't quite ready to talk to them just yet, and he much preferred being alone with Sara. Over the days they had discussed many things, both serious and trivial, and Grissom had slowly begun to come to terms with everything that had happened. He still woke often in the night, soaked in sweat and shaking with fear, and he still disliked being alone for long periods of time in the dark, but he was slowly coming out of the depression he had sunk into. There had been visible changes in him, and Sara felt herself grin every time she saw him and realized that he looked better still. Better rested, better fed, and more at ease. And now it was the last night of his vacation and Catherine had decided that they would all go out for dinner before shift. It was, she had admitted to Sara after she voiced the idea, something that she wanted to do in replacement of the party they had planned for Grissom months earlier. And, in a way, something that she felt needed to be done, both for Grissom and for the rest of the team who were still trying to really understand everything that had happened in the whirlwind week that Grissom had returned to the office.

And now Sara and Grissom found themselves sitting outside Catherine's restaurant of choice, with Grissom at first attempting to talk her in circles in an effort to stall the inevitable. Soon, however, he merely lapsed into silence, finding that if he didn't speak or move, neither would she.

He had been disagreeable from the minute Sara had told him about the dinner, and had and was making his opinions known to her. Sara knew, though, that his unwillingness to comply with Catherine's request was caused by the worry and doubts he still harboured about seeing his team again. Of the things they had talked about over the week, guilt had been the topic that had come up most often. It was apparent that Grissom felt that by returning to work before he was completely ready he had been selfish, and had caused undue stress to his team. He had told Sara on the third day that he wasn't sure he would be able to face them again anytime soon, to which she had responded that he had already talked with Nick, and Warrick and Catherine had visited. There was no reason for him to be worried. He had merely shaken his head, and looked away. "It's… it's not the same. I can't explain it," he had said, and it had been obvious that their discussion was over for the time being.

So, as her watch continued to tick out the minutes in the dead silence of the SUV, Sara waited for Grissom to make the first move. He needed to do this for himself. And finally, after close to ten minutes, her patience was rewarded as he hesitantly reached out and pushed the door open.

"You coming?" he asked, trying to hide the nervousness in his voice.

"Yep," she said, flashing a grin at him, "Let's get in there."


As they entered the restaurant, Grissom glanced around nervously. He felt stupid at the sudden urge to grab Sara's hand, and he resisted the impulse as the waitress at the front desk pointed them towards where the team were already seated beside the dance floor.

"Hey, Grissom, hey Sara," Catherine called as they made their way over, and the rest of the team looked up as well. Grissom felt his stomach flip over, and he took a breath to calm himself as he attempted to return the smiles and greetings that were being sent his way.

"Hey, Cath. Nicky. Warrick." He nodded to Brass and Greg, and took an empty seat opposite Catherine and beside Sara, who had already plopped herself down and grabbed a menu.

Waiting for their waitress to get around to them, the group discussed everything and nothing, and Grissom found it relaxing, as he began to realize what Sara had told him all along; that not only did no one blame him, they wanted to help him. And he realized that that was exactly what they were all doing here; helping him adjust, helping him get over it. Sara had been a big help, and would continue to be, but he also needed this, and he felt an incredible weight lift from his shoulders at the revelation. He grinned, and took a sip from his drink.

"What are you so happy about?" Brass asked, raising an eyebrow at the sudden look of happiness on his friend's face.

"Nothing," Grissom responded, but continued to smile as though to let them know that it was ok. His smile disappeared, however, when he put down his glass and Catherine reached out and caught his hand.

She pursed her lips as she ran her fingers over the rough skin. "Knuckles are healing pretty well," she said, glancing up athim, her eyes almost challenging.

Grissom resisted the urge to pull back as all talk stopped and everyone's eyes turned to him. It's ok, he thought. And a trace of a smile flickered across his face again as Catherine continued to inspect his hand. "Yeah," he said, "They feel all right. So does the wrist."

Smirking in satisfaction, Catherine relinquished her hold and leaned back in her chair. "Well that's good, Gil. Very good."

Grissom didn't respond as he took another sip of his drink, but he didn't have to say anything. It was perfectly clear from the look in his eyes that he was all right, and it was something that both surprised and pleased the group. Sara was the only one who didn't appear at all moved by what had just happened, and once again he couldn't help but grin as he thought, she knew. She knew you'd be all right. It gave him great satisfaction to think that she knew him that well, and trusted him that much. He was gong to be all right. Everything was going to be all right.


"I'm not," Greg muttered, "I'm just a lowly lab tech."

"Yeah, right," Warrick responded hotly, "Any other time you want to be a big CSI like the rest of us, and now all of a sudden you're chickening out. Give me a break, man."

Greg flashed a cheeky little grin and turned back to his food. "Ah, Warrick, the joys of living within two worlds; if something ruins the balance in one you can retreat to the other."

The group had been happily gossiping about Ecklie over their dinner for the last ten minutes, but now all of the sudden Grissom had the distinct impression that they were all hiding something from him.

"Ok, will somebody just tell me?" he finally broke into their argument. Even Sara looked quite unsure of herself, and he felt himself go cold. What the hell was it? Had Ecklie said something to the Sheriff? Was he going to have to take another 'vacation?' As much as this one had helped him, he didn't want to repeat the experience any time soon. But then as he continued to run through the options he forced himself to calm down. It couldn't be that bad if Greg was still grinning away over there. It… His train of thought was cut off as Nick spoke up.

"You tell him, Sara," the Texan demanded.

"What?" Sara blurted. "Why?"

As Nick opened his mouth to reply, a mischievous look in his eye, Sara held up her hands in defeat.

"Ok, ok," she muttered. She didn't want Nick opening his big mouth about her and Grissom yet; it would be just her luck if he did and Grissom had a full blown panic attack. Nervously, she glanced at the man beside her, who was waiting expectantly. Oh, God. "Uh, Gris… while you… were away… I, uh... well, Ecklie…"

"Spit it out, Sara," he growled. "Aren't I supposed to be the one who has trouble stringing two words together?"

Giving him a dirty look, Sara blurted the words out quickly. It was like ripping off a Band-aid in one go. "WhileyouweregoneEckliecleanedoutthebreakroomfridge."

"Huh?" Confusion was evident on Grissom's face.

"Well, Grissom, what she's trying to say," Brass interceded, "is that while you were gone, Ecklie, God have mercy on his slimy soul, decided to, uh, clean up the break room."

"And how does this affect me?" Grissom asked, folding his arms over his chest. His voice had a tinge of sarcasm as he added, "I'm sure it affects me in some way, really, I'm sure. I'm just having difficulty seeing the connection."

"The break room," Warrick supplied. "And the break room fridge."

Grissom cocked his head, blinking as slowly he began to realize. "He cleaned the fridge?"

"And, well… I'm sorry, Gris, his excuse was the break room fridge is for food, not…"

"My experiments?" Grissom bellowed. "He threw out my experiments?"

Sara winced, covering her ears as several other patrons turned to stare. "Uh, Gris, keep it down, will you?"

"My experiments!" he continued disbelief written all over his face. "I've been working on some of those for months! Months wasted; completely wasted. My experiments!" Enraged, he began to rise from his seat, but Sara pushed him back down.

"Take it easy, will you?" she hissed, not sure whether to be worried or amused that he was reacting like this. "It's not like you can go and beat him."

"My experiments!" he repeated, and his eyes were wide as though he were in shock. It didn't appear that he was going to storm off the find Ecklie anytime soon, though, so Sara let go of his arm.

Seeing that a crisis had been averted, the team suddenly saw the hilarity of the situation. They had, after all, pestered Grissom often about removing his experiments. He had always ignored him, and now he didn't have the choice of taking them and putting them in another fridge of his own free will. Ecklie had taken care of them for him.

"That went well," Greg chuckled, and then he suddenly burst into laughter. Nick, Warrick and Catherine soon followed, while Brass and Sara merely smirking as Grissom glared at them, incensed.

"This isn't funny, Catherine, stop it!" he warned, but none of them could stop as tears began streaming down their faces. Realizing that trying to stop them was futile, Grissom settled for pushing his food around his plate and sulking quietly. He had always disliked Ecklie, but now he hated him. What kind of man threw out a scientist's experiments, anyways? A non-scientific minded weasel like Ecklie, he thought darkly.

"Is everything ok over here?"

"Huh?" Grissom glanced up as their waitress hovered sternly over their table.

"Is everything all right?" She surveyed the group with thinly veiled suspicion on her face.

Seeing that no one else was going to answer, Grissom gave her what he hoped was a warm smile. "Yes, everything's fine." Slimy bugger. I should put his head in a jar and place it beside Miss Piggy in my office. Teach him to mess with my experiments. "The food is very good," he said, forcing his smile wider in an effort to convince her to leave. Apparently it succeeded, because she disappeared again, and the rest of the team began to settle down, Catherine sighing as she complained about her stomach.

"You'll get no sympathy from me," Grissom said bluntly, stabbing his fork at her across the table. "Where were you while all this was happening?"

Realizing she was about to be crucified, Catherine bit her lip to stop from snorting at the look on his face. "I was, uh, in your office, doing paperwork."

"Nick and me were out in the field," Warrick offered.

Brass shrugged when Grissom pinned him to the chair with his gaze. "I wasn't even in the lab that night, my friend, don't look at me."

"I was in the break room when he did it," Greg said, staring at nothing as he remembered. "I figured I should say something, but he was in a foul…" suddenly he realized that Grissom was staring at him, his blue eyes shooting daggers.

"Uh, I, I tried to stop him, Gris, really, I told him, and I tried to fish them out of the garbage can, but…"

"Stop speaking, Greg," Grissom warned in a low voice.

Greg's mouth snapped shut, and he swallowed hard as he put his hand to his neck. It was highly disconcerting the way Grissom was eyeing his jugular and fiddling with that knife. Highly disconcerting.


"Come on, Gris, dance with me."

"Catherine, I said no. I don't want to dance." He didn't say what he was thinking – I don't want to dance with you.

"Oh, come on, please?"

After learning about the unfortunate demise of his experiments, Grissom had been a bit subdued, but everyone had been relieved when he had bounced back and joined in the conversation again. Then the music had started, and Catherine had started pestering him to dance with her.

"No, Catherine," he said again as she nudged his leg sharply under the table. "I don't want to dance."

Everyone at the table realized that by getting him to dance Catherine hoped to get him to relax and have a bit of fun, even Grissom himself, but it was apparent that he wanted nothing to do with her and her little plan.

"Just one, Gil," she begged, and Grissom shook his head again. Ducking his head, he glanced sideways quickly at Sara, who was smirking at his predicament. God, he wanted to dance with her. Why couldn't Catherine just go away?

Sitting opposite Grissom and Sara, Nick saw the way his boss glanced at the woman beside him, and he smiled as he remembered the morning he had had breakfast at Grissom's place. Poor Grissom; he didn't want to dance with Catherine – it was obvious he was dying to be with Sara. Except what are the odds he can't figure out how to ask her? The Texan thought with a smirk before taking pity on the older man and intervening just as Catherine grabbed his arm and was about to pull him out onto the dance floor.

"Uh, hey, Cath, Warrick's a good dancer, why don't you get him to go with you?"

"Huh, what?" Warrick, who had been talking to Greg at the other end of the table, turned to stare, a look of shock on his face. Shit, shit, shit, he thought, what the hell are you doing, Nick?

"What do you say, 'Rick?" Nick prodded.

Warrick just gaped as Catherine raised an eyebrow at him.

"You dance, Warrick?"

"I…" Nick prodded his friend in the ribs, and Warrick jumped as he collected himself. "Uh, yeah, my grandma made me take lessons when I was in high school."

Sending a look Grissom's way, Catherine grabbed his hand. "Well come on, then, I love dancing. You're probably better than Grissom, anyway."

With Catherine dancing and unable to pester him anymore, Grissom fell back into the conversation again, trying to ignore the looks Nick was sending his way. He might not be that great at relationships, but he knew exactly what the Texan was trying to tell him, and he did not want Nick involved. Sara had told him that Nick knew about them the day after the breakfast, and he had surprised even himself by taking it rather well. He had decided that, while he enjoyed his privacy, it wouldn't be the end of the world if the rest of the team knew about them. Besides, if the team knew, then that would mean he wouldn't have to worry about not being able to hold her hand when they went out together, or even worry about being able to dance with her. Of course, it seemed he wouldn't have had to worry about that anyways as he couldn't seem to actually work up the courage to ask. Finally, when his brain had gone over the possible options about a million times, he excused himself and disappeared into the bathroom. Hidden from sight, he leaned wearily against the wall with a sigh of frustration. Crap. He was such an idiot. He stayed there for as long as he thought he could get away with, agonizing over his options before finally, he splashed his face with cold water to wake him up and exited the room.


It had been almost ten minutes since Grissom had excused himself and disappeared to the bathroom, and Sara was beginning to wonder where the heck he might be.

When Catherine and Warrick finally returned to the table, flushed and giving each other sideways looks that were meant to be discreet, Sara glanced around worriedly. "Hey, did you guys see Grissom when you were up there?"

"Uh, no, sorry," Catherine responded, but Sara could tell she wasn't really paying attention as she turned back to Warrick and the two continued their discussion. Brass, Nick and Greg just shrugged at her, glancing around as they, too, searched for Grissom with their eyes. As a new song began to play and more people stepped out onto the dance floor, Greg suddenly grinned. Sara frowned.

"What?" she asked suspiciously. Greg didn't answer.

"Um, Sara?"

She turned at the soft touch on her shoulder and the sound of his voice as she sighed in relief. "Oh, Gris, hey, we were wondering where you were."

"I, uh…" he stumbled over his words, and behind Sara Nick ducked his head as he fought not to grin. The rest of the team stared in confusion and curiosity. "I was wondering if you would… dance. With me."

As he said the words Sara's face split in a soft smile. Wow. This was way more than she had hoped for tonight. As far as she knew, he had been planning to keep their relationship a secret for a while yet. It was a pleasant surprise to find that he was going to get this over with now just so he could dance with her. "Grissom," she responded, "I'd love to dance with you."

It appeared that he had been holding his breath, as he released it suddenly in a great whoosh, and tentatively held out his hand. The music grew in the background as she took the offered hand, and as he led her out on the floor Sara was delighted to hear Catherine behind her, sounding completely shocked.

"What the hell?"

"What's the problem, Catherine?" Nick said gleefully, "Haven't you ever seen a couple before?"

"What?" Then the blonde realized what he was saying, and her eyes widened. "They… you knew! How could you know?"

"Oh God, oh no, it's over, say good by to Greggo," Greg said in disbelief as he banged his head against the table.

Warrick just shook his head, grinning widely, and Brass continued sipping his coffee as if he had known it was coming all along. "About time," he muttered.

Catherine's voice rose to a wail. "How could you know!"

"I'm an investigator, Catherine," Nick said smugly, but all he received for his troubles was a sharp kick in the shin.

He forgot all about the bruise, however, as Grissom carefully took Sara in his arms, and they began to dance together. To Nick, Grissom had always been invincible – scared of nothing. And now, here he was, looking nervous just dancing with Sara Sidle. Oh, well, love could do that to a person.

For the first few seconds, as they danced, they were silent, Grissom trying to calm his wildly beating heart, and Sara revelling in the feeling of him holding her as they danced.

"You like the song?" Grissom finally blurted, and Sara glanced up at him, a smile plastered across her face.

"Sure," she said, though she hadn't really been listening.

"Yeah," Grissom responded. "It's… kind of nice."

Wondering if he was just saying that to try and get a conversation started or if he really did like the song, Sara cocked her head and listened. Her eyes widened as the soft notes were suddenly joined by a voice.

Sick and tired of this world
There's no more air
Trippin' over myself
Goin' nowhere
Waiting
Suffocating
No direction
I took a dive

And on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
And on the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you

"You know," he murmured, ducking his head so his forehead rested against hers, "I've never been very good at… expressing myself… so this is… what I wanted to – needed - to say to you."

Sara swallowed hard, feeling tears building in her eyes, and she wound her arms around his neck and pressed her lips to his in a long kiss.

I've been wondering why
It's only me
Have you always been inside
Waiting to breathe
It's alright
Sunlight
On my face
I wake up and yeah, I'm alive

When she finally pulled back, burying her face in his chest, he allowed his chin to rest on her hair, and they continued to sway slowly to the song.

"You saved my life, Sara," he whispered. "You are… everything to me."


'Cause on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me from myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
And on the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you

I was so afraid
Of going under
But now
The weight of the world
Feels like nothing, no, nothing
Down, down, down
You're all I wanted
Down, down, down
You're all I needed
Down, down, down
You're all I wanted
You're all I needed

"You saved my life, Sara… you are… everything to me." His words brought the tears back to her eyes, and she clung to him more tightly.

"I love you," she sobbed, and Grissom stroked her hair as for the first time he was able to hold her, and reassure her, and whisper that he loved her over and over again.

And I won't forget the way you loved me

"I won't ever forget." He repeated the lyrics of the song fiercely in her ear, brushing away her tears, as though trying to banish any doubts she might have about his ability to stick this thing through to the end. He needn't have, though; collecting herself she sighed, and relaxed once again into his hold.

"I know," she murmured. Then she gave a wet smile. "I won't let you forget."

"Good," he replied softly, and he closed his eyes and lost himself in the words and the feelings and the meaning of their first dance.

All that I wanted
All that I needed now
Oh on the way down
I saw you
And you saved me
From myself
And I won't forget
The way you loved me
And on the way down
I almost fell right through
But I held onto you

Down, down, down
But I held onto you
Down, down, down
But I held onto you

"I'll always, always be here for you to hold on to, Grissom. I promise."

The End