Hello Readers!
Okay I have some things to comment on (based on some reviews).
In regards to those who say they haven't seen much Yugi/Yami scenes: it's all part of the grand plan!
Patience, people! They will get their times to shine. Just making sure the suspense is built up before it all spills over…..
Okay…Back to the show!
Chapter 16: …….
Once Yami stepped into the house, he was bunched with nervous energy - all because he knew what had to be done. For some reason he felt the urgency to patch things up with Yugi as soon as he got home. The more he procrastinated, the more he felt things would get stagnated, which would only make things worse. Besides, it would never do to let this linger on until the day grandpa arrived from the hospital, which he would much prefer to resolve WAY before then. No…it HAD to be done tonight, no matter how uncomfortable the task would be.
The advice Serenity had given him this afternoon DID help immensely.
Yami sighed, thinking what a fool he had been for not going to his friends earlier when his mind became so muddled because of Yugi and his standoffish behavior. Now that he thought about it, why had he been so hesitant about telling them the things that were discussed today? Was it fear of rejection? Or was it just plain stubbornness and regal pride, he thought.
Maybe a little of everything…..
He had to admit. Things have not gone on the way it used to be around here. The realization of that hadn't hit him until he had actually spoken to Joey and the others, and that was….well, NOT good.
So if things were ever going to get back to normal around here, it had to start with him and Yugi first.
While deep in thought, Yami had already shrugged off his jacket and flipped his shoes to the side. He gazed at the clock that hung on the wall of the living room.
"5:45 p.m….Where the hell is he?", he said impatiently.
He sat down on the couch, his legs tired of the day's journey and his mind weary of everything that happened today. The fatigue was slowly settling in for sure.
Stifling a yawn, Yami knew that rest would have to come after he had gotten dinner on the way. But first and foremost, Yami decided, it was time to wash up.
Scene Two:
Click.
Yugi made sure to close the door as smoothly as possible, not wanting Yami to know immediately that he was home. Well, with the lights on in the house, it was obvious Yami was in residence and he wasn't exactly cheerful about it.
Ever since Yami and he had that fight a week ago, he had been reduced to snooping and sneaking around ….just plain old avoiding him like the plague.
He walked briskly towards the steps, taking them two at a time, making his way into the bedroom undetected…. much to his relief.
Yugi plopped himself on the bed, with much on his mind.
Yugi's POV:
……..
What next? What am I to do for the rest of the evening? I feel so……trapped, so…
I don't know…..useless now, that I don't even know what to do with myself these days. This past week has been just about the most depressing, most awkward week of my life.
And besides feeling trapped and useless…I feel lonely. Ever since Ty and I severed our ties, I really don't have anyone to confide in. Things were miserable when Yami and the others were so caught up into themselves to even notice me, but I at least had Ty to talk to.
Now, I have no one…and it's nearly unbearable.
The days at school went painfully slow, everyone saying their diffident 'hi's' ands 'byes' to me and that was as far as it went with them. And when I mean 'them', I mean Joey and the others.
Funny how close friends could become mere strangers, all in a matter of a week or so.
There were times where I would sit in class and I would turn to my side and see Joey chattin' it up with Tristan about some nonsense or another, not even saying a word to me. Oh, he would say 'what's up' to me, but I knew it was just one of those non-committed pleasantries one said daily to another person. What's worse is that I'm not even a 'person' anymore, more like a ghostly figure to them; they acknowledge my physical presence, but they aren't conscious of my spirit being there. Somehow, I just fell off their radar……
I admit that I'm bitter and jealous about that……
We were so intimate, almost like siblings in a way. Okay, that may be stretching it a little bit, but certainly it was never like THIS.
Joey was my first and best friend. Now, I don't even know if I can call him that….He's become an acquaintance of sorts; more like the dude around the block you don't know by name, but you bump into him all the time.
Now ironically in this case, I KNOW this 'dude's' name and we've been best friends at one point; but now it's…just not what it once was. The Joey I knew is now just the dude you see all the time, but rarely talk to….
The blame can be dished out to various parties in regards to this dilemma I'm in.
Yami….Joey…..
EVERYBODY….
"Except you, Grandpa."
Yami….because he is so damned…better than I am. I was rarely one to have low-self esteem, but when one stood next to Yami, you could definitely pale in comparison next to him. He's handsome (hell, he LOOKS like me, but somehow he's MORE handsome), he's more intelligent, he's more charming, more polished - all the qualities one would deem exceptional.
Now, I never had a problem with ANY of that; in fact I was quite accepting of those facts myself that Yami was simply blessed in just about everyway……..until when people started comparing me to him; and for some reason, Joey, Tristan, almost EVERYONE just felt he was the better 'version' of me and thus treated him as such, knowingly or unknowingly. And because of that, I faded into the background and now lying here, pathetically trying to figure out what the fuck happened.
I can honestly say that the finger can also be pointed towards my direction as well. I blame my naivety, my complacency for allowing them to make me become this invisible form. I let them….
I should have never let it get to this point. That's what happen when you are too forgiving and are willing to see the good than bad, letting that blind you from reality. And I was blind….
Heck, I was BLINDsided!
It would be easy to beat up on myself about this but the bottom line is….I can't see myself living in this hapless form, living in Yami's shadow, not even doing anything to change this funk I'm experiencing. But I haven't quite found out exactly HOW to do that.
I've done all the soul-searching and self-rediscovering one could do when they are depressed, needing to find a new purpose to attain, but it's still vague and uncertain to me.
I guess that may be the reason why I've been avoiding Yami. I'm unsure of what kind of reaction I would get from him, now that he's become this enigma of person. Despite all that critiquing and analyzing of myself and Yami, the one thing that stood in the epicenter in all of this was that concrete kiss, which was the biggest mystery of all.
From trying to interpret it's meaning, all I know is that it never stopped me from dreaming about it over and over again, dreaming of being….
End of Yugi's POV:
Knock. Knock. Knock….
Yugi was brought out of his reverie by the knocking sound that came from the door.
"Yugi?"
He sighed.
'What does he want, now?', Yugi thought derisively.
He chose to lie there a little while, hoping that Yami would give up and just leave him alone; but much to his chagrin, he heard another string of knocking on the door followed by another shout of his name.
He rolled his eyes heavenward and rolled himself from the bed, swinging the door open.
"WHAT?"
Yami was taken aback by the irritated tone he heard in Yugi's voice. He had come out of the shower 5 minutes ago, his hair still damp and disheveled, wearing a towel around his neck sporting a white T-shirt and blue boxers.
"Well, 'good-evening-to-you-TOO', Yugi", he replied mockingly in response. "I just wanted to see if you were in."
"Does my presence here say enough?", Yugi snapped, heavy with sarcasm.
Yami's crimson eyes grew slit-like, his patience and temper being tested by the very second. Yugi's hostile mood was evident the minute he saw his face. Why the hell was he surprised?
He responded coolly. "Yes, I can SEE that, but you've been disappearing about the place like some lost soul. One never knows when you'll turn up nowadays."
Yugi's eyes dimmed in resentment, his mouth a thin, hard line.
'He didn't need this crap…..NOT now.', he thought, doing all he can to tamp down that roiling feeling he experienced every time he was near contact with Yami.
His defenses were twitching, causing the adrenaline to rise and flow as if it was preparing itself for battle. It made him feel alive……and he was itching for a fight.
"Is there something else you want, Yami? ...BESIDES trying to 'see' whether I'm in my room?", he said with high exasperation and annoyance.
"Jesus, Yugi! Are you going to continue acting this way with me? I don't want to fight with you; All I want to do is talk to you, only if you'd let me!", Yami exclaimed, obviously sensing that the last thing he wanted to do was get into another verbal match with him.
Lavender eyes gleamed at him with a quiet vengeance.
"There's nothing to discuss.", he voiced gruffly.
"Even as you say that, you know deep down that's a damn lie. We can't keep putting this off any longer, knowing that Grandpa would be home anytime soon. You know he wouldn't be happy if he …"
"Don't you even make this about Grandpa…Don't! This has NOTHING to do with him. It's funny how you suddenly want to 'talk' to me when you find that I have other things to preoccupy my time with, when before you didn't give a shit about any of that as long as I stayed out of YOUR way. And as far as I'm concerned, all of this is about YOU!", Yugi sneered.
Yami eyes turned into bright boulders when he heard his accusation. "About me?"
"Yes, about YOU. It's been that way ever since this shit happened. You tell me to butt out and much to my dismay, I did. NOW suddenly, I'm having too much of a goddamn life now and you can't stand not being the center of attention. Is that why you can't bare it when I mention Tygris? Is that why you can't stand the fact that I've been with him instead of worshipping you like some sacrificial saint?"
Even thought those questions were versed in a rhetorical way, Yami knew Yugi was still expecting some explanation from him. But he said nothing to that, just waiting….
He remembered what Serenity had told him: Let Yugi talk his feelings out. Let him vent out all that bitterness and ill will he's felt these past days. Maybe that would finally be the first step to putting this behind them. And so…he waited quietly for the rest of Yugi's onslaught.
….
Unfortunately, Yugi took Yami's dead silence as an acknowledgement to his guilt.
"I thought so…..I guess our little 'talk' is over since you obviously have nothing to add to that."
He was about to close the door when Yami shot his hand out to hold it, not letting it budge an inch further. He stared at Yugi while he gathered the words he wanted to say.
"My behavior through out all of this has been deplorable…and for that I am truly sorry for all I've put you through. Please, you can't stay locked up this room forever. Look at me…."
Crimson eyes gazed into the lavender ones, hoping that he would finally acquiesce.
"Will you forgive me? ...Please…?", he pleaded, his voice a mere whisper of itself.
But the glare in those eyes never wavered, still determined to thwart him every step of the way.
"I'm not the only person you owe an apology to….Can I have some privacy now?", Yugi voiced stubbornly, still holding the knob of the door in direct defiance.
Tongue-tied, not knowing what else to say in his defense, Yami reluctantly let go of the door. Yugi was almost surprised with the extension of Yami's silence, pretty much expecting the mighty pharaoh to go down fighting.
Thinking for the first time in a long time that he had the last word, Yugi slowly resumed his earlier attempt at closing his bedroom door, sighing as he pushed it the rest of the way.
"…No."
Yugi's eyes widened a fraction as Yami's hands held fast of the oak wood that was this close to shutting him out before shoving it full force, slamming against the wall.
"WE need some privacy…"
With that, the former King of Egypt had his way, pushing a startled Yugi into the bedroom and closing the door behind him with an emphatic BLAM that echoed through out the house.
End Of Chapter: Okay Peeps! Reviews! Reviews! Reviews!
