Vocabulary
Rated PG for the word "whore"
Author's Notes: FYI, I don't own Degrassi or anything. This is a poem in Ashley's point of view, around the end of season four. There aren't any spoilers though, so fear not. Written because lately I wish I knew what was going on in her head. And because Ashley don't get much love. Reviews are appreciated.
o o o o o o
I'm trying to figure out
Who I am
And I'm afraid I might
Use too many words
I whore them out all the time
When I speak they spill
From my mouth like
Birthday cake frosting
Vomitted
By a greedy child who swallowed
Much more than she should have
And I wrote so many poems
And I read them
Out loud
For everyone in the world
My bleeding heart was a token
I wore around my neck
Because I wanted them to see it
I wanted their attention
When I was hurting I wanted them to know it
I needed hundreds and hundreds of words
To make it clear to them
But they still
Never got it
And I'm still
Not sure of where I stand
I tried too hard
I always try too hard
I always use too many words
Think too much
Talk too much
Waste too much time
On things that don't mean anything
And what is there to say
When you ask me what's wrong
What I think
How I feel
I have said too much already
And they still
Don't get it
I'm running out of words
I'm scraping the bottom
To see if there's anything left
Anything that can make me
Me again
Anything I haven't ruined with my
Endless, meaningless, hopeless
Words of so-called wisdom
I'm trying to figure out
Who I am
And I'm afraid I might
Speak too soon
