Chapter 6
More Notes: yeah, this one gets kind a violent, there's some torture. Deal with it
"What happened to you, Legolas?" asked Elrond, hurrying over to support Legolas, who was clearly in danger of falling.
"I was out riding," lied Legolas. "And I fell. The horse stepped on me…Gods it hurts, Elrond."
Elrond made a quick diagnosis. "I think you've got at least two broken ribs. You should be more careful, Legolas. Your father would not be pleased with me if I have to inform him that he died in Imladris because I was too careless to watch for his safety."
"What, are you my keeper now?"
"I'm older than you are."
"So is Glorfindel."
"Do you really want him shadowing your every step?"
"No," said Legolas emphatically. He couldn't believe he had lied to Elrond about his injury, but something about Glorfindel had been so threatening that Legolas couldn't work up the courage to tell the truth. Now I know exactly how Erestor felt.
Erestor crept through the early morning shadows. He was dressed in all black, a shadow hidden within the shadows. He was well-armed and knew he was ready for anything. He doubted that this would take long, but it was something that he really needed to get done, both for his own sanity and for the safety of Imladris.
He was well within the compound when dawn began to break. He stayed within the shadows (of which there were many), and moved ever closer to the center of the camp, where he felt the commander of this group would surely be. The security of the camp was quite lax, and he only had to dispose of four or five sentries before he made his way to the main building.
He had only just walked into the building when he heard voices behind. Mumbling a curse under his breath and then a hasty prayer to the Valar to protect him, he took out his two daggers; they were better for fighting up close and in a cramped area. He kept moving towards the center, hoping beyond all odds to find the commander before the orcs found him.
He opened a random door and saw an orc sleeping. There were a lot of what Erestor believed the orcs thought were trophy objects, and so assumed that this was the commander. He walked up to the still-sleeping orc and sliced the orc's throat open with one of his daggers. He wiped the bloody dagger on the orc's filthy clothes and then began to try to figure a way out. This was enough work for one day; he needed time for the orcs to realize that their leader was dead. Then panic would set in, and Erestor could take advantage of the chaos.
Then a foot darted out in front of him and he tripped. He landed hard; the wind was momentarily knocked out of him. He cursed his stupidity and his hurry that had made him a lot less cautious than what he should have been.
"You have killed our commander, scum," said the orc that had tripped him. The orc gave Erestor a foul smile. "You will have to answer for that."
Erestor tried to get back to his feet, and had gotten halfway, had his daggers out again, but they were knocked out of his hands and a heavy foot was pressed onto his chest. Another orc approached; he was carrying heavy metal chains. The orcs chained him and then pulled him to his feet. Erestor half-walked, was half-dragged through the hallways. Jeers surrounded him on all sides. Erestor knew what his treatment was going to be like and he didn't want to think about it. I'm sorry, Elrond. I failed you.
Haldir was roaming the hallways when Celeborn found him. Haldir looked so miserable that Celeborn wanted nothing more than to take him to some secluded spot and do whatever he could to cheer Haldir up. But as much as Celeborn wanted that, he was old enough and had enough experience to know that it was best not to push such matters. If Haldir came to him looking for comfort, Celeborn would give it, and give it gladly. But he would not force it upon Haldir.
"What is it?" asked Haldir. He had been swathed in misery ever since he had returned here to Lorien. The thought that Erestor was out there somewhere, suffering perhaps, was more than Haldir could take.
"I just got a message from Lord Elrond. He is assembling a force to destroy an orc encampment on the edge of his border. He has asked for a contingent from Lorien. I was wondering if you would like to command that force."
"I need something to do, Celeborn. I would rather not have to work directly with Lord Elrond, as I don't think I could talk to him. But if it's just fighting…it will help me to get my mind off of things."
"Be careful, Haldir." Celeborn stepped closer, and put a hand delicately on Haldir's shoulder.
Haldir moved forward and embraced Celeborn. Celeborn had always been there for him and he was glad that Celeborn still was. But there was something that Haldir had noticed recently; that the look in Celeborn's eyes had changed from one of friendship to something that Haldir would have termed lust. But Haldir didn't want to think about Celeborn wanting him; that was too complicated for him.
"Celeborn?"
"Mmm?"
"Do you want me?" Haldir felt that he needed to know this; it wouldn't change the friendship between him, but it would affect the way Haldir acted around Celeborn. "And please tell me the truth."
"Then…yes, I do." Celeborn was all but certain that Haldir did not feel the same way about him. In a way, that saddened him, but he could deal with it. "But I don't expect you to feel the same about me."
In that instant, Haldir saw Celeborn, not as his Lord or a trusted friend, but as the attractive elf that he was. His heart began to beat a little faster. What about Erestor asked his brain of his traitorous heart. Does he mean nothing to you? Haldir looked up at Celeborn, unsure of what to do.
Celeborn could see the conflicting emotions in the younger elf's face. He released Haldir from the embrace. "As I said, I don't expect you to feel the same. But if you do…if you ever do…I would love to get to know you on a more personal level." He smiled. "But the contingent to Imladris leaves tomorrow morning."
Haldir smiled. "I will think about it, Celeborn." And he knew that he would, and he hated himself for feeling like that. He turned away from Celeborn and walked down the hall purposefully, to his room. He would have to get ready to leave. Suddenly, he was no longer as drained as he had been. There was work for him to do, and there was an elf that cared about him to come back to when he was finished.
Celeborn watched Haldir walk away, and could immediately detect the change in Haldir. He smiled to himself. Maybe, at last, he would get what he had hoped so desperately for. He shook his head and continued to walk. He had to go meet his chief advisor. Ostensibly, they were to be discussing some reports of orc activity, but Celeborn had gotten the feeling that that was explicitly not going to be what happened.
Erestor muffled his cries as they pulled his last fingernail. His hands were now a bloody mess. They had already beaten him, but this pain was far more exquisite. He wasn't sure yet what they wanted out of him, but whatever it was, he had no intentions of telling them. So he suffered as silently as he could, though the occasional whimper did manage to find it's way out.
"Elf, tell me your name," said one of the orcs.
Erestor grit his teeth and remained silent. He wasn't going to say anything. His life meant nothing anymore; he had nothing to live for. It didn't matter if they killed him now.
"You know, there's a lot more we can do to you, elf."
Erestor remained silent. He was well aware of the methods of torture that orcs could use. He was all but certain that they could come up with quite imaginative ways to make him hurt. But that didn't mean that he was going to talk.
"Tell us now, elf, or we will make your life worse than you could possible imagine it."
Erestor suppressed a smile. A month ago, he would have agreed. But now his life had become so unlivable that any physical pain they put him through would not come even close to equaling the emotional and psychological pain that he had been through since Glorfindel arrived.
"Bring it in!" called the orc.
An orc walked in, carrying a steaming basin and some rope. Erestor eyed it with morbid curiosity. Very carefully, the orc set it down. Using metal tongs, he pulled out what Erestor immediately saw were hot coals. Mentally, he winced. He felt that he knew what was coming and tried to mentally brace himself.
But the preparation was not enough. When the hot coals were tied firmly onto his hands, Erestor lost control. When the orc asked him who he worked for, the first thing that came out of his mouth was, "Elrond…Imladris."
A message had arrived in the night for Elrond. Elrond was pulled out of his warm bed to go read it and was not all that happy about it. He treasured his good nights of sleep because they were so rare. He sat down in his study and snatched up the message. We have one of your spies the message read he will not reveal his name but he has told us that he works for you. We will return him to you if you give us his body's weight in jewels and mithril.
Elrond was perceptive enough to know that this was from the orcs on his border. But who have they captured? I have sent none up there. And then a name popped into his head: Erestor. That fool. He went there by himself and now he's gotten caught. And now he wants me to do something about it. He can keep dreaming. What the orcs wanted was extortionate, and Elrond had no intention of paying the ransom, especially if it was Erestor. Erestor deserved no favors from him.
Glorfindel walked into the study. "Why did you get up?" he asked sleepily.
"They have Erestor," said Elrond.
Glorfindel appeared a little more alert. "Who has Erestor?"
"The orcs."
Glorfindel knew that he couldn't appear too alarmed. He didn't want to give that much away to Elrond. "And what do they want from you?"
"His weight in jewels and mithril."
Glorfindel raised an eyebrow. "And do you plan to give it to them?"
"Absolutely not. I don't give in to ransom demands like that. And why should I care about Erestor? After what he did to you…I owe him nothing."
"What do you think he will tell them?"
A lot realized Elrond. Erestor had been his Chief Advisor for more than a millennia, he knew so much about Imladris and its workings. And now he would feel no need to be loyal to it, as Elrond had kicked him out for good. Erestor could easily destroy us. "He could tell them everything," admitted Elrond. "But there's nothing I can do about it."
"You could send someone in to kill him," said Glorfindel.
"I am no kinslayer," said Elrond firmly.
"Well…there are other ways of silencing someone besides killing them," mused Glorfindel thoughtfully.
"You sound like you want me to send you out there. What do you want, revenge?"
No, nothing of the sort. "I do want you to send me out. I know how to do what needs to be doing, and Erestor trained me. What more do you want?"
The knowledge that you are not dead nor held captive. "Meleth, please reconsider. You know how dangerous this could be and I don't want to lose you."
Glorfindel smiled. "I have to do this, Elrond. You know that. The groups from Lorien and Mirkwood will be arriving in a few hours. It's important that I get out of here before they come. So let me go now. I promise you that I will return."
Elrond didn't want to agree. He felt that he would be sending Glorfindel to his death. And he had grown to care about Glorfindel; not as much as he once had cared about Erestor, but still enough to not want him to die needlessly. But he could see the sense in Glorfindel's arguments. "Very well, then. Go. But don't you dare get killed, Glorfindel."
Haldir was heartsick to arrive at this place again. He wanted nothing more than it to be like it had always been, with Erestor here and Glorfindel gone. Haldir didn't think that that was too much to ask. He didn't even really care if Erestor loved him or not. In some way, that was immaterial. What mattered to him the most was that Erestor be here, be safe, because Haldir loved him and wanted more than anything for Erestor to be happy, even if it was not with him.
Elrond came out to meet the group and seemed slightly surprised to see Haldir there. "You will be staying the night here and will leave at dawn tomorrow," Elrond said. "You will be part of a group of about a hundred and fifty elves, fifty from Imladris, the fifty of your group, and fifty from Mirkwood. Haldir, could I speak with you privately for a moment."
Haldir followed Elrond off. "What is it, Lord Elrond?"
"Why are you back here?"
"Because Celeborn asked me to come."
"Don't think that you are going to be causing trouble here…"
"Don't worry, Elrond, I wasn't planning to. I want to spend as little time here as possible. The Gods only know what crime you would plan for me to have committed before long…"
"Erestor raped Glorfindel! It was not a crime I planned; it was not one I would have even believed Erestor capable of committing. Just because he was your lover for a week does not mean that you knew the inner workings of his mind…"
"But you did. You knew how he thought, you knew that he would never hurt someone like that. It is Glorfindel you blindly trusted, and it is Glorfindel that you know nothing about. And here is something that differs: I know about Glorfindel, I know about his past and I know what he is capable of. He wanted Erestor out of the way, so he planned to make up a heinous crime for Erestor to have committed!"
"Keep your mouth closed while in Imladris, Haldir," said Elrond in an icy tone. "Or I fear that some accident may befall you." Elrond paused for a moment. "And now leave me alone, get your elves settled in, and do not seek me out again." Elrond turned and walked away.
Haldir scowled at Elrond's retreating figure. "I swear that you will answer for your crime someday, Elrond of Imladris," he murmured. "You will pay for the terrible thing you did to Erestor."
Legolas understood that there had to be a certain amount of chaos, as there was a lot happening at Imladris, but that didn't mean the whole world had to end, as it appeared to be doing. All of Imladris was in chaos. There were delegations from both Mirkwood and Lorien, and along with an Imladris contingent, were going to deal with some problem with the orcs. Legolas had been trying to meet with Elrond today. It was important that they get this whole trade deal out of the way. He had been here longer than he had planned to. And this place now had some rather unpleasant memories associated with it. Even his father wanted him home; his father had sent him a message a couple of days ago. Legolas missed Mirkwood and was rather sick of Imladris.
"Can we talk later?" asked Elrond, when Legolas tried to talk to him.
"No," said Legolas. "My father wants me to leave here today or tomorrow." That was a stretching of the truth, but that didn't matter.
Elrond sighed. "Have we not discussed the issue to death already?"
"Please, Lord Elrond, we need to go sit down and iron this out firmly. Do we really want to have to do this all over again simply because we overlooked some minor detail this time around?"
Elrond's logical brain kicked in. Whatever he might be thinking right now, it was important to concentrate on the things that would affect his future. Though having either Glorfindel or Erestor killed would definitely affect my future. "Okay, Legolas. Let's talk." He led Legolas to another room, where they could talk in private.
Legolas could tell something was bothering Elrond, and was fighting his curious impulse to ask Elrond what was wrong. Finally, it came out, "Is something wrong, Lord Elrond?"
"No," snapped Elrond.
"That simple word states its own falsity," said Legolas with a small smile. "Does it have to do with Glorfindel leaving?" He had not found out Glorfindel's mission, as it was apparently one of the utmost secrecy.
"No," said Elrond. If it had been Erestor grilling him for the truth, he knew that it was much more likely for him to break down and confess. But this was Legolas; he barely knew the elf, so felt no compulsion to break down the same way. Erestor isn't here Elrond reminded himself. And if Glorfindel gets his job done right, Erestor will never be the same afterwards. I don't think Glorfindel will kill him, but if he cuts out Erestor's tongue, or something similar, Erestor will never be the same elf that he was before I exiled him. "But I thought that we were supposed to be discussing our trade agreement."
"If there is something in particular bothering you, it could affect your judgment. Maybe we should talk about it so that it doesn't affect your negotiating." Legolas gave Elrond a cocky, knowing smile.
"I'm fine," said Elrond through clenched teeth. "Let's just get on with it."
Erestor knew that he was close to death. He had long since stopped trying to remember what he screamed out in his moments of agony. That didn't matter anymore. He lay soaked in his own blood on the floor. Hazy memories passed through his mind. For some reason, they all seemed to focus on Haldir. One in particular, continued to appear.
Erestor was huddled in a dark corner of the encampment. It was about a week after he had seen Lord Elrond for the first time. Since then, Elrond had been using him for meaningless, insignificant tasks, and that just made Erestor feel even worse. Elrond had never asked his name, never even really looked at him. And that somehow hurt even more than Elrond's thoughtless remark when Erestor had first seen him.
Suddenly, a figure appeared above Erestor. "What are you doing out here?" asked the voice, not unkindly. "It's starting to rain."
"I have nowhere to go," mumbled Erestor, wishing the other would just go away.
But he persisted. "What do you mean?"
"Just leave me alone," said Erestor, not wishing to be rude, but only wanting to be alone.
The elf crouched down in front of him. He frowned, a glimmer of recognition in his eyes. "Have we met before? I am Haldir of Lorien." When the elf did not reply, Haldir smiled and said, "It is customary to give one's own name."
"Erestor."
"Of?"
"Nowhere."
Haldir smiled a little more. "I see, Erestor of nowhere. It is getting cold tonight and will soon rain. If you have nowhere to go, then I am sure that you will be welcome in my tent to have something to eat and drink if you would like." He could see that this elf was barely more than an Elfling, small and underfed. Haldir was struck by a sudden urge to take care of the elf.
"If you want," said Erestor uncaringly.
"Come on, then," said Haldir, standing back up. Erestor stood up as well, and Haldir saw that Erestor was reasonably tall, even though he was quite scrawny. "How long have you been here, Erestor?"
"A couple of months, my lord."
Haldir laughed. "I am no lord, Erestor. Simply Haldir."
As the night passed on, and Haldir and Erestor talked, Haldir became more and more intrigued by the elf. Haldir's interest in Erestor stunned him. Ever since he had broken up with Glorfindel, he had thought of himself as worthless and unworthy of companionship. As the evening dragged on, Erestor felt that he should leave and let this obviously better elf get some sleep. He stood up. "I should leave."
Haldir smiled. "You don't have to, you know."
"Hmm?"
Haldir rose just far enough to caress Erestor's face. "You don't have to leave."
"I don't even know you."
Haldir fought another smile. This was obviously not an elf that believed in one-night stands. "Okay. I apologize for asking you that. But I would like to talk to you again."
Then Erestor surprised both himself and Haldir by leaning down and kissing Haldir. In Erestor's mind, this evening had redeemed Haldir of those comments he had made to Elrond a week ago.
Haldir looked up at Erestor and smiled.
Erestor was pulled out of his reverie by elven voices. He opened his eyes and found Glorfindel standing above him, a sad look on his face. "Why'd you have to get yourself caught?" asked Glorfindel.
Erestor struggled to speak and eventually managed to say, "Just kill me."
"I don't want to do that, Erestor, meleth, I don't want to kill you, I love you too much." Glorfindel turned as he heard other voices. He frowned. "I have to leave, Erestor, Elrond doesn't want anyone to know I was here…I hate to do this, Erestor, really I do. Please understand." Glorfindel pulled out a dagger, bent down, and gently pressed the blade to Erestor's neck.
Elrond was pacing his study. He felt so lonely now. Erestor was gone, so were Glorfindel and Legolas and Haldir as well. The companions he had had for the past few weeks, for better or worse were gone and he felt so alone now. He wished that he could go back in time far enough that Glorfindel was no longer here and he still had Erestor around. Even if Erestor didn't love him, at least he would not be in the hands of the orcs and he would still be here in Imladris.
A knock at his door and then an elf walked in. "Lord Glorfindel has returned, my lord."
"Send him in," said Elrond.
Glorfindel walked in a few moments later. He looked downcast. "Hello, Elrond."
"How did it go, meleth?"
"I was too late," lied Glorfindel easily. "They had already killed him by the time I got there. I saw no sense in staying."
Those words hurt Elrond more than anything that had happened in his life. The love of my life is gone, gone forever. "What did you do with his body?"
"I buried it outside the camp. I felt that he at least deserved that much."
"Yes, he deserved at least that much." Oh, poor Erestor. All the wrongs I've done you, and now I won't even have a gravesite to go to and beg your forgiveness for everything. You will never know now what I would have done for you, how much I would have loved you. You are gone from me forever. He looked at Glorfindel. "I'm just glad that it's all over."
"Is it over?" asked Glorfindel.
"Yes," said Elrond. "It is over."
Author's Note: No, it isn't over
