Disclaimers etc in pt 1.
Walking down the hall, I saw Daniel standing in the doorway of the bathroom. As I got closer, I could hear Cassie throwing up. I had forgotten about what she and her friends had done the night before, and she was now paying for her lapse of judgement. Walking past Daniel and into the bathroom, I knelt down by Cassie and asked Daniel to give me a washcloth. Seeing that I had things under control, Daniel slipped out and closed the door.
I waited until Cassie was done and before wiping her face.
"I feel like the world's spinning, Sam. Why did I think this was the answer? I shouldn't have listen to my friends telling me that it would make me feel better and would make me forget for a little while. Daniel said that after I threw up I would feel better, but I don't believe him. I swear I'll never take another drink again in my life," Cassie mumbled.
I rubbed her back and watched her throw up again. Pulling her hair back I wiped her face again. Drinking is never the answer. It only numbs the pain for a while, but once you sober up, the initial hurt is still there."
"I was so out of it I only remember bits and pieces of what I told them. I hope they just think it was the alcohol talking. It didn't make what happen yesterday any more easier. One minute I'm trying to keep myself from falling down, and the next some creep grabs me from behind. I was in shock at first, but then I heard Teal'c voice in my head telling me not to panic, to take a deep breath and to assess the situation. I was so scared, but when I saw the other one grab you from behind, I pushed my fear away and focused on what I had to do. I wasn't going to let them take us without a fight. When I flipped that guy, I think he was surprised. I could tell he wasn't expecting me to fight. I don't remember much after that. Daniel said I was zatted so you're going to have to fill in the blanks," Cassie said.
I told Cassie what had happen to our attackers, that one was dead and the other was at the SGC recovering from his injuries.
I took her to the mirror and pointed out the bruise that was forming on her cheek and the ones on her upper arms. She looked at me and saw the dressing on my head and the bruise forming on my lower jaw.
I told her that the wounds would heal, but I was afraid of what this whole ordeal was doing to her.
"You're strong in spirit. I saw it in your eyes last night. You used your inner strength and followed Teal'c's instruction perfectly. You realized how dangerous the situation was, but still acted professionally. Our lives were at stake and you cause the distraction we needed. We also had luck on our side. If the guys hadn't come back when they did, I don't know what would have happen."
"Daniel took really good care of me and he didn't leave my side. I woke up a couple of times last night when I was having my nightmares, and he was there to hold me and make me feel safe. He was my rock last night, Sam, and I feel like I've let him and all of you down by getting drunk and acting so irresponsibly last night. I know it was wrong," Cassie said
I told her that I thought she had learned her lesson, but she had to tell Jack and the others what she did. I also made her promise that she wouldn't do something like that again. If things ever got to that point that she need to drink to make her pain go away, she would feel comfortable enough to come to one of us for help.
She nodded and said she would tell them after breakfast. I helped her out of the bathroom and walked with her to the kitchen. Murphy and Ferretti were in the kitchen making breakfast. Teal'c was outside walking the grounds since Russell had to leave to go back to the SGC. Palmer was about to leave, but was waiting for Jack to update him on what had happened yesterday. I sat Cassie down and went to get her a glass of water. I asked Murphy where Maybourne was. She quietly informed me that he was in the garage waiting for Palmer to leave. I asked if she had found out anything. She said she would brief us when the Colonel joined us.
Daniel had made Cassie a cup of tea and handed her two aspirins. I sat next to her and could tell that the smell of breakfast was not agreeing with her. Suddenly, she got up and ran to the bathroom. I was following her when she almost knocked Jack down. He grabbed her and saw the panic in her eyes. Seeing me running behind her, he assumed the worse.
Quickly throwing us behind him, he yelled out. "What the hell's going on here!"
Could this get any worse? I tried to get Jack's attention, but was thrown into the bathroom with Cassie. Cassie didn't wait any longer. Reaching the toilet, she proceeded to throw up again. I reached for the washcloth and waited for her to finish.
Everyone had heard the commotion and dropped what they were doing. With Jack yelling out for help, I could hear Teal'c, Murphy and Ferretti in the hallway, wondering what was wrong.
Someone knocked on the door and I heard Daniel's voice. I told him what had happened and how Jack had gotten the wrong impression. He was relieved and said he'd try to get them calmed down and explain what really happened.
I could hear Daniel trying to calm Jack down, asking him why Cassie had nearly knocked him down and why she was throwing up in the bathroom.
Daniel attempted to tell him what Cassie and her friends had done.
I could hear Jack through the door yelling at Daniel for being careless and not keeping a good eye on Cassie and her friends. He continued to yell and curse, asking who they had gotten the alcohol from.
As Daniel moved the conversation into the living room, the hallway became quiet again.
"Well, I guess the cat's out of the bag. Jack was really mad. I've never heard him curse so much. It's my fault and he's blaming Daniel. I should be the one he's yelling at, not Daniel. What a mess I' ve made. I hope he can forgive me," Cassie said.
After we emerged from the bathroom, everyone was sitting around the dinning room table quietly eating breakfast.
I whispered to Cassie to see if she wanted to go back to her room to lie down. She nodded no, telling me that she understood that she had to face the music sooner or later.
Jack was staring at us with a disapproving scowl. I knew this wasn't going to be good. I held her hand as I spoke up. "Cassie has something to say, and I would like all of you (looking directly at Jack) to let her finish before saying anything."
Cassie took a deep breath. "I want to apologize to all of you for my actions yesterday. Getting drunk was not what I had intended to do, but I was feeling so bad and my friends said that you would all understand if I wanted to numb the pain a little. I almost got Sam killed yesterday with my actions and it just makes me sick to think that my irresponsibility was the cause. Jack, Teal'c. I know I've disappointed you and saying I'm sorry isn't going to make this any better, but I don't want your forgiveness. I deserve to have you punish me for my stupidity. Ferretti, Murphy and Maybourne. You all risked your lives to keep me safe and how do I repay you? By almost getting taken by the same people your trying to protect me from. I've been nothing but careless and don't deserve your love and loyalty. I screwed up and sorry doesn't begin to cover what I've done."
She walked out of the dinning room and into the backyard. We were all too stunned to say anything. I looked to Teal'c, who caught me looking at him. He seemed to understand what I wanted and he got up and walked outside, followed by Daniel. Maybourne, Mu rphy and Ferretti just looked at each other, and I heard Maybourne whisper to Murphy "poor kid".
Jack was staring at his plate. We still hadn't made eye contact. When he finally looked up, he was angry.
"Carter, when were you going to tell me about what happen yesterday with Cassie? What the hell were you and Daniel doing while we were trying to track down Maybourne's lead? Keeping an eye on one kid is not that difficult. If it was too much for you, I could have had Teal'c stay. Did you forget that Maybourne said we have to be on our guard at all times. One careless move almost cost us her life as well as yours. If you're not up to handling this responsibility, then maybe you should re-evaluate your ability to protect Cassie," Jack said flatly.
I was surprised and in shock. I was trying to calm down before I spoke. I looked around the table and could see Ferretti and Maybourne trying to pretend they weren't there. Murphy was upset. She got up. "Permission to speak freely, Sir?"
Before Jack could answer, she let him have it.
"The kid screwed up. She was hurting and thought this was going to help her pain and now she's paying for it. I sympathize with her. Do you know the pain of losing a mother at that young of an age? I do and she's doing a lot better job of it then I did. And if that isn't enough to handle, she has people trying to abduct her. Look what she did yesterday. She stopped those men from taking her and Major Carter. That took a lot of guts and all you can point out is her one lapse in judgement. She's young, and if this is how your going to react to her mistakes, then maybe you should reassess your role in raising Cassandra. From what I've seen, Major Carter has done a hell of a job with her. She needs someone to understand her pain, not to point out her errors. She's young, so it's a safe bet she'll be making more."
With that Murphy got up and left the table, walking outside. Jack looked at me. I got up and was about to leave the table when Jack grabbed my hand and asked to speak to me privately.
Maybourne and Ferretti got up and walked outside and left the Colonel and I alone.
He took a deep breath and asked me to tell him exactly what had happened.
I told him what had happen. After I was done, he sat there and closed his eyes, rubbing the back of his neck.
"When were you going to tell me about this?" Jack asked.
"I know this has been hard on you, but we can't let our personal feelings interfere with our objective of keeping Cassie safe. You should have never gone outside with Cassie in that condition. You should have had Palmer or Russell guard her while you looked for Daniel." Hesitating, he continued. "I think we all need to sit down and see what Maybourne and Murphy found out last night. I also have to apologize to Daniel and Cassie for blowing up. I just don't like being kept in the dark. When I saw you two running down the hall, I thought the worst. Sam , can you forgive me for saying what I just did to you about Cassie? It was wrong and out of line. You're doing a great job. I was just being Jack O'Neill, resident jerk. "
I sighed. "Jack, I should have told you last night, but I didn't and for that, I am sorry. But the things you said today… I don't know. It hurt me, but I understand where you're coming from."
"I'm glad you understand. I think we better let everyone back in before they think we've killed each other." We both stood up and walked outside to see what the others were up to.
Daniel, Teal'c and Cassie were sitting on the steps of the deck. Maybourne was nodding off in the corner on a recliner and Ferretti was reaming Murphy for what she had said to Jack.
Jack cleared his throat to get everyone's attention. "Let's move this indoors. We have a lot of stuff to catch up on, so I think we better get started." As Daniel moved passed us, Jack pulled him aside and apologized for what he said. Daniel was at a loss for words, but I could see that he was relieved with Jack's apology.
Teal'c waited for Cassie and looked at me to make sure I was okay. I smiled and nodded at him that I was. He bowed and moved indoors with Cassie. Jack reached for Cassie's hand.
"Cassie, I'm sorry for yelling at you. Even though I don't approve of what you did, it doesn't mean I don 't love you. I will still be here for you. Don't do anything that dumb again. Leave the dumb stuff for me okay?" Jack said, giving her a hug. Cassie smiled and held him tight. She said she'd try harder not to do any other dumb things.
Ferretti was walking up the steps and looked at Jack. "I've just reminded Murphy that even though we're helping you guys out, it doesn't excuse her not respecting the chain of command. I think I got my point across."
I looked pass Ferretti and could see Murphy making her way to the door. She tried to avoid looking at Jack and I, but was stopped when we blocked the door.
Jack and Ferretti moved inside and I asked Murphy if I could speak to her. I said that I knew why she yelled at the Colonel and said that I appreciated it.
She looked up and I could see the dark circles under her eyes from lack of sleep. "Major, thank you, but I was out of line. I want to apologize to the Colonel. He just made me so mad. Couldn't he see that Cassie was hurting and had made a mistake? Then when he said that stuff about you, I lost it. I knew I hit a nerve when I saw him flinch after I said he should reassess his role in Cassie's life. I guess I haven't been making the greatest impressions here, have I?"
We smiled at each other and I knew I had found another ally.We walked inside to begin the briefing. Nothing had changed, but things couldn't get worse. Or so I thought.
tbc
