Warning: This fic contains gore and sex and, even though everything in it is written in a one hundred per cent artistic way, it shouldn't be read by minors.
"See that window up there?" Rei continued. "That's where princess Nina's room is. Ryu, all you have to do is to climb up there, take some photos of the princess while she's undressed. Then we can use the photos to blackmail her for like a billion zenny."
Teepo bashed his stick over Ryu's back. "Come on dragon boy. What're you waiting for?"
And up our little friend climbed. It took him nearly an hour to reach his destination and he was so scared about losing his grip and falling that he was all shaking. And worse it got, even though it made all his efforts worth it, when he saw princess Nina sitting on her bed with a tiny scissor which she used to cut her pubes with. And if it hadn't been for the pelican that attacked Ryu so bad he had to escape through the window, he might have gotten some really nice photos. "Who's there?" Nina screamed. "Guards!"
Some hours later Ryu, Teepo and Rei woke up in one of the castle's cells by a soldier emptying a bucket of cold water over them. "Sorry we had to smash you unconscious," he said, "but the princess was screaming like crazy and it was the only way to make her shut up."
"It's ok, I guess," Rei said.
"So you kids really planned to take nude pics of the princess and blackmail her."
"Yeah," teepo said. "My plan was great, but as usual Ryu let us down."
"No, the plan was stupid," the soldier laughed. He threw in a dozen of dirty magazines in the cell. "Look, our sluttish Nina sure knows how to bring in some extra cash to the castle. I tell you, there's not a man in Wyndia who hasn't already seen her boobs 'n' snatch."
"Hey, he's right," Rei said while checking out the magz with big eyes. "Wow, this sure is good stuff."
And here the adventure of our three pals ends. If they haven't escaped the dungeon or been executed yet I guess they're still sitting there reading their adult magazines.
Author's note: This was the second fic in a set of six I'm planning to write, one for each of my six favourite games. If I haven't been reported and thrown out from here by then, you who liked this should soon start to look out for the next one among the Zelda II fics.
