Disclaimer: If I owned Professor Snape I would be to busy to be writing this story. Here is another chapter so obviously I still don't own him or anything else.

AN: Thank you Midnight Lilly for the story ideas and being my beta.

Thank you Don Raphiel for your kind review. With so few reviewers it makes it easier to thank each one.

Chapter 17 You Ain't Nothing But A Hound Dog

You ain't nothing but a hound dog
Been snoopin' round my door
You ain't nothing but a hound dog
Been snoopin' round my door
You can wag your tail
But I ain't gonna feed you no more

You told me you was high class
I could see through that
You told me you was high class
I could see through that
And baby I know
You ain't no real cool cat

You made me feel so blue
You made me weep and moan
You made me feel so blue
You made me weep and moan
'Cause I'm looking for a woman
All your lookin' for is a home

HOUNDDOG by Jerry Lieber and Mike Stoller

Alexis was tired, after the discovery of Black's visit, she had been up late last night helping to search the castle. She had known that the search would be in vain, but had to at least go through the motions. She considered asking Dumbledore to perform a memory charm on her, so that she wouldn't know what was going to happen for the next three years. That was the coward's way out, she needed to be alert for any deviations from the books. But there were a few things she could do that should not have any effect on the overall outcome.

Snape had been up all night patrolling the halls and was trying to catch up on his sleep. That is why she was outside on a cold November day in the late afternoon with a picnic basket looking for a large, black dog. Taking the Gryffindor Tower as a reference she was walking along the edge of the Forbidden Forest.

Alexis heard a hissing noise coming from inside the forest. Following it she found Crookshanks, with his back arched and every hair on his body standing straight up hissing and spitting at a large tangle of bushes.

"What is it Crookshanks?" Alexis questioned the hissing cat.

Uncharacteristically, Crookshanks ignored Alexis's question and began to back slowly away from the bushes. There was a prickling on the back of Alexis's neck as she heard for the first time a low, menacing growl. Suddenly the bushes started shaking and a mass of muscle and black fur crashed from its hiding place flashing impressive canines.

Alexis yelped in surprise and froze in place when the dog turned his attention to her. Alexis tried for a calm soothing tone, "Hello there, aren't you a big boy? I'm not going to hurt you and you're not going to hurt me."

The dog had stopped growling, but his hackles were still raised. He was looking at her with interest but was still very wary.

Alexis looked around and found a convenient rock. Taking the picnic basket out from under her cloak, she set it on the rock and began rummaging through it, "I bet you are starved."

The dog's nose was twitching as the scent from the basket reached him.

When Alexis turned around she had a plate piled high with thick sandwiches loaded with ham, turkey and chicken. Looking at the dog, she carefully placed the plate on the ground and then backed up a couple of feet. The dog approached the plate but did not touch the food.

"Oh for heaven's sake," Alexis exclaimed and went to the plate, shooting the dog a dirty look when he growled at her, she picked up each sandwich and took a small bite out of it. "There I haven't poisoned them, you're hungry so eat." This time she didn't move away from the plate but sat on the ground near it.

Crookshanks with a wary eye on the dog, sidled up to the plate and stole the ham out of one of the sandwiches. That finally seemed to convince the dog that the sandwiches were safe, he began wolfing them down.

Alexis summoned the picnic basket, "Accio picnic basket," and brought out a cup and a flask of pumpkin juice. After filling the cup she took a sip and then put it on the ground in front of the dog. This time he didn't even hesitate as he emptied the cup. Alexis filled it twice more for him before he flopped to the ground next to her and gave a doggy grin.

Alexis held out her fist for him to sniff and when he gave it a messy lick instead, she laughed and started scratching him behind his ears.

When she stopped he gave her a reproachful look, nudging her hand with his nose.

She pretended not to understand what he wanted, he proceeded to try to climb into her lap.

Laughing Alexis began tussling with him, until he decided to cheat. All of sudden Alexis felt something long and very wet slurp her from neck to eyebrow, "Eww, not fair! Not fair," she cried and tried to move her head out of the line of attack. But the dog was a master at this game and proceeded to find every tiny opening to get a lick in. Soon Alexis was flat on her back with a face covered in dog drool.

"Yuck," Alexis said sitting up and grabbing a napkin from the basket to wipe her face, "I am definitely going to need a bath before dinner," pulling leaves from her hair. "Speaking of baths, you could use a good scrub yourself," Alexis was giving the dog a considering look.

"A flea dip, hot bath and a good brushing are what you need," Alexis informed the dog.

"What shall we call you?" Alexis was finger combing the dog's tangled fur. "Stinky seems appropriate," at the growl that elicited Alexis laughed, "you don't like Stinky I take it. How about….Pumpkin? You seemed to enjoy the pumpkin juice." The dog growled again. "Pumpkin is out. OK, you are hard to please."

The dog thrust his head into her neck and began vigorously sniffing. "Stop that, tickles," Alexis giggled and pushed him away. "I've got it…Sniffey?" deep growl, "Sniffles?" deeper growl, "Yes that does sound rather like you have a cold, how about Snuffles then?"

The dog started licking her face happily. "OK, enough, enough, Snuffles it is."

Alexis suddenly looked up realizing that it was growing late and gave the dog a last hug, "I'm sorry Snuffles, but I have to go."

Snuffles whined.

"I wish I could take you with me, but that is just not possible," Alexis said gently pulling his ears as she stood up.

Gathering the picnic stuff together, she emptied the basket of the last of the food and laid it out on a napkin for Snuffles.

"Same time tomorrow?" Alexis asked.

The big dog immediately perked up and started wagging his tail excitedly.

Alexis headed back to Hogwarts with Snuffles as an escort. Crookshanks had already disappeared, presumably in search of his dinner.

Alexis stopped just at the edge of the trees and gave Snuffles a pat, "This is as far as you should go."

Snuffles watched her until she passed out of sight and then returned to the pile of food she had left him. He finished the sandwiches and pumpkin juice, then headed back to his sleeping place when his nose caught a now familiar scent. Sniffing around, he found a hair ribbon that smelled of vanilla and roses. Apparently it had pulled loose during their play. The dog carefully picked it up in his mouth and headed to his lonely bed.

Alexis made her way through the entrance hall and headed up to her room.

She desperately wanted to clean up. She carried with her a very strong odor of dog, she knew her hair and clothes were full of leaves and dirt.

Hopefully she wouldn't run into anyone before she could clean up.

Of course just as she reached the stairs heading up to her room, Snape came up from the dungeons and Lupin turned onto the landing above her both of them seeing her at the same moment.

"What happened to you?" Snape exploded.

"Alexis are you hurt?" Lupin sounded concerned.

"What business is it of yours Lupin?" Snape snapped.

Lupin gave Snape a look and hurried down the stairs to Alexis, "She is a friend and colleague."

Snape sneered as he reached Alexis first, "I am here and I have everything under control, I will escort her to the hospital wing, you may go about your business."

Lupin gave Snape a hard stare, "My business takes me that way, so I will escort her and you won't have to go out of your way."

"It is not out of my way, I was headed to the Hospital to see what potions Madam Pomfrey is in need of," Snape stated.

"You shouldn't be distracted from such important work, I will be able to devote my entire attention to Alexis, so it would be better if I escort her," Lupin reasoned.

Snape snarled, "I am well able to assist Alexis and obtain a list of potions from the nurse, there is no reason for both of us to make the trip to the hospital."

The two men were standing one on either side of Alexis, continuing to argue about who would be helping her. Alexis looked from Snape to Lupin, sighed, and then side stepped the both of them to continue up the stairs to her room. Good thing I really don't need medical help, I would be dead and buried by now if I was waiting on one of them to get around to taking me to the hospital.

"Why don't we let Alexis decide who will assist her?" Lupin asserted.

"That is the first good idea I have heard come out of your mouth since you arrived here."

They both turned to look at Alexis…and realized she was gone. Looking around frantically, they were just in time to see the edge of her cloak as she took the turn onto the second floor balcony. Hurrying up the stairs behind her they continued their argument.

"Now look what you have done, you have wasted so much time that she had to make her own way to the hospital," Snape sniped.

"Me! You were the one who insisted on standing in the corridor debating the issue," Lupin insisted.

"If you had not interfered, I would have had her at the hospital by now getting treated for her injuries."

They caught up with Alexis, as she was half way up the third floor staircase and each grabbed an elbow to help her up the stairs. In fact they were so intent on helping her, that they had lifted her off her feet and were carrying her up the stairs. When they reached the third floor corridor, they started off toward the hospital wing which was one floor up and on the opposite side from Alexis's room.

Alexis looked from one to the other, they were continuing their argument over the top of her head. Feeling rather like a piece of furniture, Alexis wasn't sure if she should burst into laughter or tears.

Finally she decided to get mad, "Put me down."

They ignored her.

A little louder, "Put me down!"

There was no break in the argument going on across the top of her head.

Thinking it through, she had two feet she wasn't using right now, there were two of them, it would take careful timing but she thought she could manage it.

WHAM! She kicked them both in the shins at the exact same time. Unfortunately she hadn't followed the thought all the way to its conclusion so when they dropped her to grab their legs, she wasn't prepared.

"OWWW! What was that for?" came at her in stereo.

Alexis looked up from her position on the floor where she had fallen, "If you would both listen to I wouldn't have to take such drastic measures, now help me up." Alexis held out a commanding hand to Snape who looked at it suspiciously.

Giving him a very dirty look, Alexis then held out her hand to Remus, he hobbled a step back from her still rubbing his injury.

With a deep sigh of extreme aggravation, Alexis managed to get to her feet unaided by either of the two wizards who had previously been so solicitous of her health.

Without looking at either of them, she started back the way they had just come intent on reaching the sanctuary of her room.

Sharing an extremely male look of puzzlement at the actions of the female of the species, Remus and Snape hurried after Alexis. both limping slightly, those boots packed a wallop.

"Where do you think you're going? The hospital is behind you," Snape said from a carefully discreet distance.

"I am not injured, I have been outside playing."

"Playing? What or who were you playing with to get yourself in such a state?" Snape said suspiciously moving closer as it seemed she wasn't going to kick anyone.

"I was playing with a large dog outside, being small of stature the dog had an unfair advantage," Alexis smiled in remembrance.

Snape relaxed under the mistaken impression that she had been playing with Hagrid's boarhound, Fang.

Remus chimed in, "So you're not injured?"

"No injuries, just dirty," sniffing herself, "and very stinky."

"If you don't need Madame Pomfrey, I believe I will seek her out to see if she has anything for bruises," Remus said piteously.

Stopping in her tracks, Alexis looked at the two men with a horrified expression on her face, "I am so sorry, I forgot that I had on these heavy walking boots, I just wanted you to put me down and you wouldn't listen to me." Alexis bent over and began to pull at Remus's trouser leg.

Remus was enjoying the attention, as an extra bonus, Snape looked as if he were about to explode.

"Alexis," Snape seethed.

"Severus, I'll be with you in just a moment, let me look at Remus's leg and then I'll take care of your leg."

Not liking playing second fiddle to the wolf man, Snape continued to simmer.

Alexis had managed to pull Remus's pants leg up to his knee, and was examining the rather fine specimen of man leg. After a minute, she looked up at Remus and pursed her lips in a very disapproving way, "You don't have a bruise, or a red mark, or..or..anything."

"I don't," he said innocently.

"No you don't, but if you ever pull something like that again you will," Alexis turned on her heel and hurried down the hall.

Snape gave Remus a dirty look and went after the aggrieved witch.

When he got to the portrait of the Lilac Girl, he almost ran straight into it before realizing that it had not opened for him. The Lilac Girl was giving him a very disapproving glare.

"What are you looking at?" Snape snarled.

At that the Lilac Girl gave a sniff and left her frame, leaving Snape to fume in the hall.

Snape stormed off to the dungeons muttering under his breath, "Blasted woman, what does she want? One day I am her exclusive property the next I am persona non grata."

"Ahh Severus, how are you today?"

Snape looked down at the tiny Charms Professor with a scowl that would have made a lesser mortal quail in his shoes.

"Grrrr," Snape just growled.

"Had a little spat with your lady?" Flitwick persisted, taking his life in his hands.

"Grrrrrr," Snape growled again.

"I've always found a romantic dinner and flowers make up for a host of woman imagined slights myself," After dispensing that advice with a smile, Flitwick headed to the staff room.

Remembering that Flitwick had been a real Lothario in his day, Snape decided it would not hurt to take his advice and headed off to find Slinky and prepare a romantic dinner. Whatever the hell that was.

AN: My lovely reviewers the next chapter is in your hands. Will it be frustration or consummation? Majority decision wins.