A/N: Thanks everyone for the great reviews! Keep them coming, they're greatly appreciated! Enjoy!

Disclaimer: The song used in this chapter is not mine. It is "Bless the Broken Road" by Rascall Flatts.

Chapter 4

I was back again. Back in the haze, the fog, the darkness. I hated being there, but it came to me almost every night in my dreams… or should I say nightmares.

I was on the cold, hard floor not knowing what was going on. There were men… with guns… and they started shooting at us. Shooting at Faith… I had jumped in front of her to protect her… but had I? Was she okay? Faith…

The shooting continued for what seemed an eternity. I heard machine guns along with police fire. Who was winning? Was anyone hurt? I didn't understand why I couldn't get up and see for myself. I needed to be protecting them, I needed to draw my gun and finish this once and for all… But I couldn't move.

My head was spinning. The darkness that seemed to pull at my consciousness was messin' with my head, coming deeper within my mind. What was this? 'Get up, Boscorelli!' I kept tellin' my brain to move my body, but it's like there was a short-circuit… I was stuck.

I continued to lie there, unable to do anything except wait until someone… anyone could see that something wasn't right. I wasn't okay.

I realized that the noise had stopped. The shooting had stopped. Who won? Was Faith okay? I needed answers.

Suddenly I felt movement beneath my arm. It was Faith. She wriggled around mumbling something about the shooters… I didn't really care what she had said at that point, as long as she said something. She was okay. I had protected her.

"Bosco." That I comprehended. "Bosco?" She said with more concern this time, looking around to try and find me. 'I'm right here, Faith' I wanted to say. 'It's okay.'

I felt her gentle touch on my lifeless hand, still protectively draped around her side. As she noticed that I wasn't moving, she turned around, rolling me over on my back.

That's when the pain hit. The sharp pain radiating through my entire body. My leg, my stomach, my chest… My face.

"Bosco!" I heard the sheer panic in Faith's voice as she looked down at my torn body. Was it that bad? 'Faith, help me' I pleaded with her in my mind.

"Oh my God…" She was crying. "Oh my God!"

I wanted to tell her not to cry. I wanted to tell her that it was okay, I was fine… that it wasn't a big deal. But it was. I had been shot, I knew that much. I had been shot bad enough to the point that I couldn't move. I had to fight to even stay in this semi-conscious world that I was in. The darkness kept tugging at me, wanting to take me away so that I didn't hear the pain in Faith's voice, but I refused to give in. I needed to know what was going on around me… I couldn't give into this.

My head started throbbing more intensely as I heard the loud shrill of guns start up again. It wasn't over… It was far from over.

I felt myself being dragged by my shoulders into what must have been a separate room. It hurt so bad. I almost just wanted to die right there, leaving the pain behind forever… But I knew I couldn't let myself think that. I needed to stay strong. I needed to stay strong for Faith.

"I'll stay with him." Faith's voice rang out. She was going to stay with me while the shooters were loose… I wanted to tell her she was crazy. I wanted to yell at her and tell her to get the hell out of there… But I couldn't. All I could do was lie there listening to her desperate cries of panic.

"Hurry!" She yelled, ripping my spare gun from my left leg. 'It's okay, Faith.' I just kept saying that over and over in my mind, thinking that if I thought it enough, she would hear me. She rushed back over to my head, placing her hands on both of my cheeks, propping my head upward. "Don't do this, Bosco."

I couldn't help but feel a sense of comfort through all the pain, knowing that she was there with me. She brought my head onto her lap, stroking at my hair, almost choking on her own sobs. I felt like a failure. I felt like I should be doing something to comfort her… that's what I'm supposed to do: Be there for my partner… But then my logical side decided to kick in and tell me that of course there was nothing I could do. If there was, Faith wouldn't be upset and then I wouldn't have to worry about not being able to comfort her… It was an endless cycle.

I felt myself suddenly being pulled in a direction that I didn't want to go. It was getting darker. It just kept getting darker until I reached a point of complete numbness…

"Bos? Bosco, please, no." Faith quickly lowered my head back onto the hard floor, moving around to my side. I could feel her presence become very strong as she leaned down to my mouth to check my breathing… I wasn't.

Her cries becoming worse with every passing second, and she moved herself back up to a kneeling position beside me. I felt her hands meet my chest, firmly pumping down on it every second. "One, two, three…" She could barely get the numbers to pass her lips, trying to push back her emotions and stop crying. 'It's okay, Faith…'

Trying desperately to hang on and not let the darkness take me, I suddenly felt her hands leave my chest. There was someone else here. My mind was racing… Was it a shooter? Faith needed to get out of there… Had they come back to finish me off?

I faintly heard the familiar, yet not so soothing voice of Cruz, "Yokas…"

"He's not breathing…" Faith resumed giving me CPR after confirming that it wasn't the shooters that had entered the room, but someone there to help me. Every fifteen counts or so, she would lean down to my face, pressing her lips firmly around my mouth, breathing her own air into my lungs. She was my life at that moment…Faith is my life. She kept saying my name. "Bosco" She just kept sayin' it, and there wasn't a damn thing I could do to answer her. "He's not breathing!"

Everything sort of blurred out after that. I was losing this fight. I could barely hold on any longer before this unknown force took me into the dark. I hate the dark…

I felt my body thump down of a softer surface… what must have been a bed of some sort, and quickly began to feel hands all around me, hooking me up to things, cutting at my shirt, putting a mask on my face…

'Faith' I felt her presence weaken as she left the room, yelling at Proctor for something. I wanted to tell her to come back, but I didn't even have to. As if she heard my silent call, I felt as she entered the room once again. The hazy sound of doctors and monitors and constant movement began to all blur together as I slipped into that other place. The place I didn't want to go.

"Clear!"

I woke up with a gasp, literally feeling the electric shock radiate through my stiff body. It felt so real, like I had gone back in time to the day of the shooting. Memories flashed through my mind as I sat myself up, trying to clear my head of all the intense pain. I hated going back there; back to the darkness that had almost taken me once before… but every time I closed my eyes, it seemed, I would be taken back to the nightmare of that day.

I blinked several times, trying to gain focus in my cloudy eyes, and turned to look at the clock. 11:42. I had only been asleep for an hour. That dream had seemed to last for an eternity, but in reality, I had only been asleep for an hour. How much more of this would come the next time I closed my eyes? How many nightmares would invade my mind in my next seven hours of sleep? I didn't want to find out.

Taking in a deep breath, I reached over to my side table, reaching for the phone. I immediately dialed her number and hoped that it wasn't too late for me to be calling.

"Hello?" I heard the somewhat drowsy voice of my best friend and immediately began to feel bad for calling.

"Faith?" My voice was drained. More broken and fragile than I ever thought it could be. It wasn't me.

"Bosco, what's wrong? You don't sound so good." Her tone immediately picked up when she found out that it was me who had called her. I guess she noticed the change in my voice, too.

"I'm sorry… I must have waken you. I'll let you go back to sleep, it's not a big deal."

"Bos, stop. You didn't wake me up, I just laid down five minutes ago. Tell me what's goin' on."

I should have known that Faith would drop anything to listen to me… Well, I guess I did know, I just didn't want to admit to myself that she could be there for me just like I'd always been there for her. I guess it made me feel weak.

"I just… I just need to talk to you."

"Bos, are you okay?" I could tell that she was becoming more concerned with everything I was saying. She was too concerned, and I didn't want her to worry about me.

"No… I mean yeah, it's nothin' like that." I tried to explain. "I've… uh… I've been havin' these nightmares… of… you know, that day." I stopped, not needing to say any more. I wanted to tell her how scared I had been; how I had wanted nothing more than to wake up and tell her I was ok. I wanted to tell her everything that had been going through my mind while I was lying lifeless on that cold floor, listening to her cry in terror for me… I wanted to tell her, but I couldn't.

"How long has this been goin' on?"

"Ever since I came home."

"Do you need me to come over? Just give me twenty minutes - "

"Faith," I cut her off, closing my eyes in shame, "You don't need to do that - "

"It's really no problem - "

"I just needed to talk to you, that's all…" Silence… Was she mad that I had waken her up for no reason? I felt so stupid, of course she was mad.

"I shouldn't have called. I'm sorry." With that, I hung up the phone.


What my problem was, I had no idea. I knew that I had called her because I needed to hear her voice. As lame as that may sound, it's the truth. I was up all that night thinking about why it was I had called her, and that's the conclusion that I came to.

After having sat up in bed for the past four hours, I decided to turn on the radio. Music had always helped me get to sleep when I was a kid, so I figured it wouldn't hurt to try it out again. I reached over to the side table, clicking the "on" button and turned the knob trying to find a decent station. I hadn't listened to the radio in a long time.

When I finally got to a station I could handle, I laid myself back down on my bed and listened to the words of the music.

I set out on a narrow road many years ago hoping I would find true love along the broken road, but I got lost a time or two

'Great,' I thought, 'a love song'.

I wiped my brow and kept pushing through… I couldn't see how every sign pointed to you

My ears seemed to automatically tune into the soothing music as I continued to listen, being drawn in by the words. Love songs had never made much sense to me, but I was starting to like this one… It seemed to be speaking my language.

Every lost dream led me to where you are. Others who broke my heart, they were like northern stars pointing me on the way back to your loving arms

I opened my eyes, now staring up at the blank ceiling. Is this what I needed to hear? I knew that deep down, somewhere, it was like I, myself, was singing this song. I had been singing this song for a long time… I just had never let myself know it.

I think about the years I have spent just passing through. I'd like to have the time I lost and give it back to you

My mind was racing by then. What had I been waiting for all this time? Confirmation? Guarantees? Confidence? I had been battling with my emotions for as long as I could remember, not letting myself get too attached to anyone; not letting myself love anyone… But for as long as I could remember battling these feelings, Faith had been by my side, battling them with me.

But you just smiled and took my hand. You've been there, you understand

I picked myself up out of bed, throwing on a pair of pants and a sweat shirt, not even bothering to bandage up my face. I didn't care anymore. I didn't care if she saw my scar, and I didn't care that it was five in the morning… I grabbed my keys and jacket and headed out the door.

It's all part of a grander plan that is coming true

TBC...