Disclaimer: I don't own it. Just having weird perverted fun with it.

AN WARNING: If male pregnancy offends you don't read this chapter. No slash just having fun with Snape, but thought I had better put in this warning, although I hated to spoil the surprise.

AN2: Not the end of me writing about Alexis and Snape and Amber and Remus. But do the reviewers want me to just keep this story going or start a new one to go along with book four?

Chapter 50 School's Out

School's out for summer school's out forever my school's been blown to pieces
No more pencils no more books no more teacher's dirty looks
Out for summer out till fall we might not come back at all
School's out forever school's out for summer
School's out with fever school's out completely

Alice Cooper "School's Out"

It was the last day of term and Alexis was tired of being cooped up inside the castle. She arranged with Remus to watch his third years' final exam. Harry, Ron, and Hermione came to escort her out to the grounds.

Hermione was full of questions about what it was like being pregnant, "Do you know what the major differences are between Muggle delivery and witch delivery?" she didn't wait for a response, "I bought a book on Muggle birth and compared it to a book on witch delivery that I bought at Flourish and Blotts. While there are many similarities, there are some major differences. In fact, while Muggles use an epidural, witches use a pain blocking spell that is a non-invasive counterpart to a Muggle spinal block."

Ron and Harry were both lost, "What is an epidural?" Ron asked.

By the time Hermione had explained in full detail Ron and Harry were both white, "Muggle women actually let people stick a needle in them like that?" Ron asked appalled.

Hermione went on to explain all about birth, delivery, natural childbirth versus using pain relievers. When she started talking about water breaking, dilation, and mucus plugs, Ron hurried ahead looking a little green. Harry was made of sterner stuff and managed to stay with them until Hermione began to explain an episiotomy and why it was necessary. Luckily they had reached the obstacle course that Remus had set up as a final exam. Remus helped Alexis settle in the shade on a bench that had been set up for her.

Alexis was impressed with how well the Gryffindor third years handled their exam. Harry managed to make a perfect score. Alexis gave him a hug when he came over to wait for Ron and Hermione with her, "That was amazing Harry." Harry blushed but looked pleased with the compliment.

Alexis watched as Harry and a wet Ron walked off with a still flustered Hermione. Ron had gotten confused by a hinkypunk and ended up stuck waist deep in a quagmire, while Hermione had been undone by a McGonagall boggart telling her she had failed everything.

Remus sat down on the grass beside her bench. He smiled his thanks at the cold drink she handed him. "I believe that went rather well. The Slytherins are next and then I am finished for the year."

"What are your plans for summer break?" Alexis asked.

"I don't know yet. Amber wants me to stay with her, but I'm not sure that would be a good idea."

"Why not?" Alexis was watching the redcaps popping in and out of the potholes on the obstacle course.

"Where can this relationship go? Is it really fair for me to monopolize all her time?"

"One, this is a conversation you should be having with Amber. Two, this relationship can go as far as you will let it. Amber is in love with you. That is why she is working so hard with Severus on the wolfsbane potion."

Remus looked contemplative, "Maybe," was the only comment he made as his next class started showing up to take their test.

When Draco and Blaise Zambini had finished their exams, Alexis had them help her back to her quarters. Amber was waiting on Alexis, "I got your Owl, what's up?"

"I need you to do me a favor with very few questions asked?"

"What?" Amber asked curious.

"Tonight is the full moon. I need you to wait in wolf form near the Whomping Willow. I have a bad feeling about tonight. As if something horrible is going to happen. Do you think you can do this for me?"

Amber looked at her and wrote it off to pregnancy hormones but decided that if her waiting for a while near the Whomping Willow would ease her mind, it wasn't too onerous a task. "I can do that," she agreed and was rewarded with the relief that flooded Alexis' face.

Late that night, Alexis was curled up on the love seat waiting for Snape. He came storming into the room looking more furious than Alexis had ever seen him. He was muttering curses under his breath and pacing back and forth.

Alexis just sat back and remained quiet, waiting and hoping that he would soon calm down.

He continued to pace, "Do you know what happened tonight? I was this close to The Order of Merlin First Class, and Precious Potter and his friends messed everything up once again. I can't believe it! Potter breaks every rule in the book and still nothing is done to him. Oh, by the way, I caught Sirius Black. Again no thanks to the Golden Trio and that mangy werewolf. But of course somehow he escapes. I know Potter had something to do with it," he flung himself down by Alexis.

"Severus you're hurt. Didn't Poppy look at that for you?" Alexis reached a tentative hand toward the nasty cut on his head that looked bloody and raw.

Alexis got up and went to get something to tend the wound.

"No one had anytime to heal me. Not when The Boy Who Lived was lazing around in a hospital bed. Do you know what this would have meant?" Snape snarled.

Alexis sat next to him and began to clean his cut, "What?"

"It would have been a way for me to finally clear my name," Snape sighed, "If I caught and turned in one of The Dark Lord's staunchest supporters everyone would have finally believed that I was no longer one of them," he pushed Alexis' hand aside and got up to pace.

"The only reason I am allowed the privilege," this last said with heavy sarcasm, "of teaching is because of Dumbledore's support and the Snape family fortune. Without both of those I would have been a total pariah," he sat down heavily beside her, "Our children could have been proud of the Snape name. But once again Potter and his pals have messed everything up."

Alexis finished cleaning and dressing his wound, while Snape just stared into the distance looking at what might have been. After she had put away the medical supplies, she returned and sat down next to Snape on the couch. He drew her against him and rubbed her arm while she settled her head on his shoulder.

"Severus, our children will be proud of their family name because we are proud of it. I don't care what anyone says," trying to lighten the mood, "and if you really want an Order of Merlin, I'm sure the Ministry would sell me one."

Alexis was rewarded with a snort of agreement from Snape.

"Do you need anything else? A headache potion?" Alexis asked.

"I'll get one in a moment. You shouldn't be on your feet running around taking care of me," Snape said.

"I have papers saying that you belong to me, so who better to take care of you?"

"Papers?"

"Yes our betrothal agreement and then the marriage certificate that Dumbledore filed with the ministry. All of those say that you belong to me," Alexis was smug.

"They also say that you belong to me," Snape reminded her.

"Of course they do," Alexis agreed, "What good would they be otherwise?"

"Indeed," Snape concurred as he helped his well rounded wife off the sofa and took her to bed.

The next morning Alexis woke up alone in bed. Puzzled, she got ready for the day and headed up to breakfast. Mr. Bodziner was waiting for her at the entrance to the dungeons and helped her up the stairs. Entering the Great Hall she saw a grimly smug Snape sitting at the head table and the Slytherin table was a hive of chattering students.

Pansy Parkinson came running up to her, "Mrs. Snape, did you know that Professor Lupin is a werewolf?" there was a mixture of fear and malicious glee in her voice.

"Where did you hear that Pansy?" Alexis asked.

"Why Professor Snape told us this morning," she confided before running off to spread the gossip.

Lawrence looked down at her, "Did you know?"

"Yes. Did you?" she returned the question.

"Yes. I figured it out the second time he disappeared during the full moon."

"Why didn't you tell anyone?" Alexis was curious.

"Well he was a really good teacher and there didn't seem to be any benefit for me to reveal his secret. He had nothing I wanted so there was no reason to blackmail him. I was making good grades and it is obvious that he doesn't have any money," Lawrence allowed a small smile to appear.

"Spoken like a true son of Slytherin," Alexis teased.

Lawrence bowed his head in acknowledgement of the compliment.

"I find that I am not hungry after all. I think I'll just go for a walk," Alexis patted his arm and turned to go. When he moved as if to accompany her, "No Lawrence, you stay and eat your breakfast. A growing boy shouldn't miss any meals," she teased.

He obediently turned to the table but gave her a concerned look.

When she turned to leave the Great Hall, Snape rose from his seat and started after her. He was soon able to catch her, "Alexis don't you want something to eat?"

Alexis wouldn't look at him, "Severus, no matter what you do I will always love you. But right this moment I don't like you very much. I need a few minutes to myself," and Alexis tried to pull away from him.

"Is this about that blasted werewolf?" he hissed at her.

Alexis looked up at him then and he was surprised by the pain and anger in her eyes, "No this is about the man I love deliberately ruining something for a man I consider a friend. Now, if you will release my arm, I am going to bid Remus goodbye."

Snape dropped her arm in surprise and watched as she waddled away. He went after her once again and took her arm. When she shot him an angry look he said, "I will escort you to his office and leave you to make your farewells. I would worry about you trying to make it up all those stairs by yourself."

Alexis stared into his eyes for a moment before allowing him to take her arm and help her up the first staircase.

Snape left Alexis at the end of the hallway leading to the DADA classroom, "I'll wait for you here and then escort you wherever you want to go."

Alexis gave him another long look and then beckoned for him to lean down. When he complied she gave him a quick kiss, "This doesn't mean I'm not still mad at you," she advised as she headed toward the classroom.

Alexis knocked on the open door of Remus' office. He smiled up at her, "Come in. I was wondering if I would get to see you before I left."

"I came as soon as I found out," Alexis told him, "What are you going to do?"

"Oh, I'll find something I always do," he shrugged it off.

"I need you to promise me something," Alexis grabbed his hand forcing him to look at her.

"If I can," he hedged cautiously.

"You can do this unless you let your Gryffindor pride get in the way. Promise me that if you ever need anything you will let me know. I mean it Remus. If I find out that you are in need and I am not one of the first people you call I will hunt you down and hex you," she threatened.

Alexis saw his face harden in rejection at the perceived pity and charity she was offering and he tried to twist his hand away. Alexis tightened her grip, "Remus I have so much money it should be a sin. The only reason I have it and you don't is an accident of birth. What good does all that money do me if I cannot use it to help my friends? And the only reason I cannot help my friends is that they are too stubborn or too proud to let me? At the very least with the twenty or so houses I own, I can offer you a job just going from one to the other and making sure they are being properly taken care of. You could spend two weeks in each house and then start all over again," she offered.

Remus finally relaxed and turned his hand over and gave hers a squeeze, "If I ever need you I will call on you," at her skeptical look, he grinned, "I promise cross my heart and hope to die."

"Do you need any help packing?" Alexis offered.

Remus gave a bark of laughter at that surprising both of them, "Why, are you offering?"

Alexis grinned back at him, "I could use my stomach as a table and fold your clothes for you. It is a really convenient place to sort socks too."

"Thank you for the offer, but I think I have it handled," Remus helped her out of her chair. She pulled him to her and gave him as good a hug as she could with two feet of belly between them and then kissed his cheek.

"I'll be seeing you around Remus," Alexis started out of the office, "Remember I am due at the end of July and I will want you to meet the boys since you have been around them so long," she teased.

Remus nodded his agreement as he watched her walk away.

Remus loaded his luggage into the coach and climbed inside only to find that this coach already had a passenger.

Amber gazed at him, "So when were you going to tell me?"

"How did you find out?" Remus avoided the question.

"Alexis sent Star to me with a message," Amber continued, "I am going to pretend that you were going to have the carriage take you to my place because you wanted to tell me face to face."

Remus looked at her, "That is exactly what I was planning on doing."

"Good answer as that is where we are going," she sighed as she moved over to sit next to him. Remus reached up and knocked on the roof of the carriage as a signal to start the trip.

"I refuse to live off of my lover," Remus said staring out the window.

"I refuse to let my lover live off of me," Remus turned to Amber with a questioning look, "However, until my lover finds a new job I refuse to let him live anywhere but with me."

"It may be a while. There are not many people who want to hire a werewolf," Remus' voice held a trace of bitterness.

"It will all work out," Amber assured him.

Snape was surprised when Amber showed up to work on the potion with him. He kept casting sidelong looks at her until finally she told him, "Severus, I can't say I like what you did to Remus. But I need help working on the potion and you are the finest Potions Master in Europe. Also, Remus told me that there is history between you two that goes back to when you were in school together. He wouldn't tell me what it all was about but he admitted you had good reason not to like him. I'm still trying to sort through it all," Amber began rubbing her head, "I've never had a best friend whose husband, who I also consider a friend, doesn't get along with my boyfriend," she said with a wry smile.

Snape nodded briefly, "I was reviewing our notes on the wolfsbane potion and the scar removal potion and I believe that if we combine the two and add more silver nitrate, it may inhibit the change."

Amber moved over to look at his calculations.

"Your notes about vital statistics before and after the change led me to look at these possibilities." Snape began pointing out several different lists of ingredients.

Amber nodded, "Shall we get started?"

It was a week since term had ended and all the staff was enjoying the peace and quiet. Everyone was taking a break before beginning preparations for the new term.

Poppy had told Alexis that she should deliver in about three weeks. Alexis couldn't wait. She was tired of being huge, tired, swollen and achy. After their meeting with Poppy, Snape and Alexis had decided to stop in the staff room to see if there was any breakfast left.

Snape helped Alexis into a chair, smirking at her litany of complaints, "Alexis, you know that if I could take this burden on for you I would," he smirked, secure in the knowledge that it was an empty promise.

Alexis growled, "That is very sweet of you to offer since you know I have no way of taking you up on it."

Just then Filius piped up, "Oh but Alexis, there is a complicated charm that would enable Severus to take over the burden of pregnancy for two weeks. It is based on a switching charm and I would be happy to perform it for you."

Snape had turned white and was looking from Alexis to Flitwick in horror, "Now really I wouldn't want to endanger the babies or Alexis in any way."

Poppy had came in looking for a nice cup of tea, "What might endanger the babies?"

"I was telling them about the macho simpatico macinationous charm. Severus seems to think it might hurt Alexis or the babies," Filius explained.

"That is one I haven't heard in a long time," Poppy smirked, "Severus you don't have to worry at all, there is absolutely no danger to anyone."

Alexis was grinning evilly at Snape, "Well Severus, you said you would take on the burden for me? You weren't just saying that were you? I would hate to doubt your sincerity and it is only for two weeks."

Snape looked at his wife and swore to himself that he would make empty statements again, "Very well. When do you want to do it?" he growled.

"No time like the present," Alexis looked over at Filius, "What do we need to do?"

"The only thing I can think of is for Severus to get clothes loose enough to accommodate his new girth."

Minerva spoke up from where she had been sitting in the far corner unobserved by the others, "I can transfigure what he is wearing right now," she offered with a small smirk of her own.

"Let's get started then," Flitwick smiled.

Minerva quickly transfigured Snape's robes so that they were bigger and then she transfigured the rest of his clothes to a very stretchy material that would conform to his new figure.

Flitwick began his instructions, "Severus sit down facing Alexis and put your hands on her stomach and hold very still," after Snape had reluctantly settled in the proscribed position, Filius waved his wand and chanted the charm.

Snape felt a heaviness and a tingle in his stomach and then there was an uncomfortable stretching feeling. Looking down he watched as his stomach began to swell as he could feel Alexis' stomach flatten.

"All finished. How do you feel Severus?" Flitwick asked.

"Fat," was his succinct reply.

"Wow I can see my feet, and my back doesn't ache anymore, and no more pressure on my bladder, this is amazing," Alexis jumped up and began walking around the room, "No more waddling," she laughed. "Let me get you something to eat Severus," she offered with a smile.

Snape nodded regally from the chair he was shifting in trying to find a comfortable position.

Alexis brought up a plate full of eggs, sausage, bacon, hashbrowns, pancakes smothered in syrup and a large cup of coffee. Snape smirked at her as he reached out for the plate feeling very hungry. Alexis handed him the other plate she was carrying with a single boiled egg, two slices of dry whole wheat toast and a large bowl of cut up fresh fruit.

"What is this?" Snape sniffed.

"Darling it is your breakfast," Alexis dug into her pancakes with a groan of pleasure.

"Breakfast? I want what you are having," he demanded.

"I know you do dear, but what you have is what is on the diet. You do want the babies to be healthy don't you?" Alexis took a bite of crisp thick bacon, Snape's favorite.

Snape shot her a dirty look as he heard his words repeated back to him, "Of course I do," and he began to eat his breakfast.

Alexis handed Snape the magic water goblet, "Here you go, must stay hydrated," she smiled sweetly.

Snape snatched it out of her hand and drank down the whole glass and watched in disgust as it filled up again.

"Severus are you meeting Amber at eleven?" Alexis had just noticed the time.

Snape looked at the clock and nodded and tried to get out of his chair with his usual grace and ease only to find that everything was off balance. Alexis hurried over and grabbed his hands, "Upsy daisy." Snape didn't move.

Alexis pulled out her wand and used a levitation charm to lift him out of the chair, "Not a word," Snape hissed under his breath as he tried to stride off only to end up doing an undignified waddle.

Alexis caught up with him at the staircase. He was looking at the long flight of stairs. Alexis took his hand, "Do you want Filius to reverse the spell?"

Snape's body was shouting to his brain 'YES say YES you moron! I don't know how long I can handle this. You better find a bathroom soon!' his pride was trying to yell over his body, 'Alexis has done this for almost nine months now, you can't do it for two hours much less two weeks. Are you a man or a mouse?' Even though his body was screaming 'Mouse' he found his mouth saying, "Of course not. But I do need to find a restroom."

Alexis told him where the closest one was and helped him to it.

Snape stepped up to a urinal and went to open his fly only to discover he no longer had one. His trousers were stretchy fabric. Wiggling them down he managed to free himself, but he could no longer comfortably reach his penis: his new belly was in the way. After several attempts he found that holding the babies up with one hand meant that he could perform the necessary maneuvers with the other. Then he had to tuck everything in and get his new elastic pants up. A process that normally took him two minutes had now taken ten and damn it but he had to go again.

Waddling out of the loo, he found Alexis pacing the hall, "Are you okay?"

"Of course. I am already late for my meeting with Amber so we had better hurry," he snarled.

Again they came to the staircase. Alexis matter of factly showed him the pregnant woman waddle for stairs. A firm grip on the banister and one step down, shift your grip on the banister and take another step. Snape had never known that there were so many stairs at Hogwarts. He was never so glad to see the dungeons.

Entering the classroom they were using to work on their potions, he found Amber waiting on him. He watched her eyes widen in surprise, "Hey there big boy," she grinned, "I didn't think anyone knew the macho simpatico macinationous charm."

"Flitwick," was all he said as he went to lift a cauldron down.

Amber hurried over, "Severus, you should not lift anything heavier than ten pounds now that you are pregnant," she took the cauldron and hauled it over to the table.

"Is there anything I can get you?" Amber asked him after they had been working for an hour.

"Since you offer," Snape looked at her intently, "I could really use some chocolate."

By dinner time Snape was ready to throw in the towel. His ankles were swollen, he had been to the bathroom more times than he cared to admit, his back hurt, his ribs felt bruised from the number of times the babies had kicked him and no one would give him anything to eat.

Alexis and Filius found him in his quarters trying to get Slinky to give him some chocolate.

"Severus, I miss feeling the babies. Would you mind if we had Filius reverse the charm?" Alexis asked him.

Snape had never loved her more than he did at that moment. He wanted to fall at her feet and hug her legs in thanksgiving for what she offered. Instead he replied coolly, "If it will make you happy Alexis."

"Thank you Severus. You can't know how much it means to me that you are willing to do this for me," Alexis gave him a kiss and tasted the chocolate he had managed to weasel out of Slinky but didn't call him on it.

Within minutes, Alexis was back to looking like a beachball with legs and Snape was his usual svelte self. Filius left after performing the charm.

Alexis visited the bathroom as a precaution before they headed up to dinner. Snape was very solicitous as they made their way up the stairs. When they reached the staff room, he moved one of the cushy chairs up to the table and seated her in it. He returned with an armful of pillows that he stuffed around her until she was comfortable.

When he brought her a dinner plate, Alexis noticed that the portions were more generous and more varied than in the past but she didn't say anything. Dessert was served and it was a seven layer chocolate cake with double chocolate fudge icing. Alexis looked in surprised pleasure at the large slice Snape set in front of her.

She had finished her cake and settled back with her hands resting on her tummy. She smiled over at Snape in sleepy contentment and burst into laughter when he asked, "Would you like seconds?"