Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma ½.

Author's Note: Another day, another chapter. Once again I prepare an offering to all you loyal readers out there. I dedicate this chapter to Ranko Urameshi. She gave me my first review so if ya wanna blame anyone for me still writing, then blame her. This chapter may contain elements of humor, I can't write a straight drama fic without a bit of humor. Well without further ado, let's get on with the show!

Strange Occurrences

Chapter 2

I could barely remember what happened. What I did know was that I was lying on the floor next to someone. It was obviously a girl, judging by the aura. She seemed to have a well-ordered aura. I tried to open my eyes, but they seemed to be glued shut. My head felt heavy and it hurt badly. The girl beside me shifted slightly as if she were either aware I was waking up or waking up herself. Finally, I got my eyes to open and see who was there.

"Ranma-sama! You're awake!" Kodachi exclaimed softly, immediately starting to fuss over me. Something was nibbling at my mind as I stared at her arm. Why was there blood on her nightgown? Wait a minute, why was Mr. Green Turtle's head over in the corner? The answers seemed to slip out of my grasp when focused on, but when I stopped trying my mind was flooded with images. The girl leaned over me, running her hands along my body. I wanted to protest, but she had on a look of concentration as she examined me.

"Like what ya see?" I quipped. Much to my surprise she blushed practically down to her toes. "Am I gonna live doc?"

"H-hai. You're injuries don't appear too serious and with your normal rate of healing, should be gone soon." she replied. I was a bit stunned that she knew about my healing ability, but kept it under wraps. Kodachi was not a danger anymore.

"I think we should get out of here." I said. She readily agreed and helped me stand up. With a practiced scoop, I picked her up and leapt from the hole easily. Sasuke was opening windows to let the poison out. He came up to us and bowed low.

"Please forgive me for my part in this, Mistress." the short ninja said. She smiled shakily at him and patted his shoulder.

"It's ok. M-my brother Taki's body is down there. S-see that he is treated with respect." she said to the little guy. As soon as he was down the hole, she started crying and clung to me. She was so upset. I had to push aside my normal hesitation when it came to holding a girl. A martial artist I guess does more then protect the weak, they even comfort the weak.

"Kodachi-chan?" I asked her, unwilling to intrude on her grief, but I had to ask. She looked me in the eyes, tears falling. "I-I need to ask ya for a favor." She wiped her eyes with the back of her hand.

"What is it?" she asked and I proceeded to fill her in on why I was there. She agreed to help me, but only after she got dressed.

Later on we were in her lab. She was wearing a simple t-shirt and black slacks, an apron over her clothes. She also wore gloves, goggles, and a filtration much like I was wearing. She wanted to run a series of tests, beginning with the dish. Kodachi had asked me to help her by being another pair of hands. She scraped the food from the dish, subjecting it to various form of testing. This wasn't my area and I felt out of my depth. I asked her if I could use the phone and she nodded absently to me before going back to work. She was a great gymnast, but she seemed to have the soul of a scientist.

"Ucchan's." a male voice on the other end of the phone said.

"Hey Ryoga." I said to my apparently former rival. The Lost Boy never ceased to amaze me.

"Yo, where ya at?" I told bacon bits where I was and what had happened. He was quiet for so long after I got done talking that I thought he hung up until he sighed.

"Damn. It was a good idea too. Too bad 'bout Kuno though." I sighed. The more we learned the less we knew. Okay, so my mind works better then a lot of people think, but this was taxing me mentally. I had to keep the pedal to the mental metal for too long.

"How's Ucchan?" I asked, feeling a strange warmth in my chest.

"She's awake n' pissed off at ya for runnin' off. Oh...uh...hi Ukyou! It's Ranma. Yikes!" the exchange on the other end would have been funny if I wasn't so nervous.

"Ranchan you jackass!" Ucchan practically shouted into the phone making my ears ring.

"Hi Ucchan." I said, it sounded lame even to me.

"Oh Kami-sama are you alright? Kodachi didn't hurt you?" That dig about Kodachi sounded hollow and unreal. I went through the same story for Ucchan, by the end of it she felt as bad for Kodachi as I did. She said that Nabiki had stopped by earlier to see me. She appeared normal, but she didn't have my experience on it. The conversation was interrupted when Kodachi came out with the results. I said goodbye and promised to fill them in. Kodachi looked pale.

"What's up?" I asked. What I had mistaken for pale with grief was really pale with anger. She looked like if she could do the mallet technique it would have been as big as Nerima.

"The components are familiar. I make it a point to know my toxins, potions, and chemicals. This was made using herbs only obtainable in China." the girl said stiffly. The dangerous beast inside of me began to stretch and tried to assert control, but I pushed it back down. My head needed to be clear and rational. I used the Soul of Ice to fully bring myself under control, but little frayed edges of my anger kept stabbing me.

"Chinese herbs, huh? Great. I need to talk to Cologne." I managed to squeeze out through my anger.

"Be careful, please. I-I would like it if we parted as friends." I managed to smile, how did that word always make me feel better? I gave her a quick hug that seemed to surprise her before replying.

"Of course we can be friends." I said to her, she flung her arms around me and hugged me tight. She has a lot of power in that deceptively gentle looking frame. She gave me an antidote to the bizarre potion. She explained how it worked.

"Alright, the potion responds to a person by magnifying certain aspects. With Ryoga it magnified his childish behavior, making him throw tantrums over little things. With Ukyou, even I noticed the suicidal tendencies, this just magnified the problem. Akane is spiteful and can be cruel. Once again another prime candidate. Kasumi feels strongly for her family and you "hurting" her made her vicious. Nabiki was probably the one least affected. She was already strongly devoted to her family and making money so not much changed. I still don't know what it did to you, however." That was a lot of information to wrap my min around, but somehow I did. The antidote was a blessing and she was going to work on making even more of it. Since it was getting late, I went back to Ucchan's. The Amazons could wait until tomorrow.

It was past eight o'clock when I made it back to Ucchan's. I had enough antidote for only a couple of people, but it seemed like a good idea to dose everyone. My friends complained about the taste, but drank theirs down completely. I felt a little light-headed after drinking it, but shrugged it off as nothing. Ryoga was invited to sleep in the living room and so was I. Ucchan wasn't the kind of girl to invite me straight to her bedroom, more points in her favor. I decided to help out and decided to mop the floor downstairs, but a knock at the door stopped me. My senses stretched out and all I felt was Nabiki on the other side. When I opened the door, she practically flung herself at me. I thought it was an attack before I realized she was kissing me, passionately. Thanking the Kami that my normal luck wasn't with me, cuz usually it would have Ucchan walk down just in time to get an eyeful. The young mercenary was either in the throes of passion, potion, or out of blackmail material. Instincts kicked in and quickly eliminated the third option, but the fact still remained that she was grinding against me in apparent ecstasy and had her tongue halfway down my throat. I tried getting her to let go, but her normal ticklish spots only seemed to elicit greater responses. Pushing her off wasn't an option, in my panic I might hurt her. Think Saotome think! I heard someone coming down the steps and acted purely on reflex, diving behind the counter. Stupid move cuz now she was squirming happily under me. I'm a healthy male so of course this is provoking a response, but my bodily control is nearly absolute. If not, then I wouldn't stand a chance in Hell of maintaining my dignity.

"Yo Ranma. Time for bed. Uh... Ranma? Where ya at?" Trust the Lost Boy to actually find his way downstairs without help. I am the universe's whipping boy. Nabiki merely giggled under me. I looked over the counter, but ducked before he saw me. She giggled louder, apparently having herself a thrill at the idea of being caught. Finally he just turned around and walked back up the stairs. How did he find the stairs? Wonders never cease. This wonder had worn thin on me. She cooed at me.

"What's wrong Ranma-baby? Ya seem tense?" she teased. Desperate times all for desperate measures and I struck a pressure point to induce temporary paralysis. She was so surprised she didn't even cry out, not even when I poured antidote down her throat. She coughed a few times and muttered about the taste.

"How ya feelin' now Nabiki?" I asked her. The girl looked at me in mild disgust.

"I feel like crap and I don't think I wanna remember what I almost did." That was the only thing that made sense tonight, until she amended it. "Well, I would have enjoyed the memory except you were too terrified to make it fun." Strangely, even that made sense.

"They said ya stopped by earlier, was this the reason?" The girl shook her head repeatedly.

"No, I saw the feed from you room. You know it couldn't have been Akane alone, right?"

"You're preachin' to the choir. I've spent the entire afternoon lookin' for leads." She raised a skeptical eyebrow until I told her everything I did. Her look had gone from condescending to incredulous. I love doing that to people.

"The Amazons huh? Hmmm... Makes a twisted sort of sense actually. They did just return from a trip to China. I'll take to a few contacts so wait for my call before you make your grand entrance. Always a good idea to be well informed, right?" I had to admit she had a good point. I almost jumped out of my skin when she kissed me on the cheek. She laughed at my flustered look before strolling out the door. Tomorrow was going to be a busy day.

I woke up the next morning to a bizarre sight. Ryoga was actually where we left him and hadn't gotten lost! Now I knew the Apocalypse was coming, batten down the hatches for Armageddon. Oh what did I do to deserve this? Enough drama, I needed food and in large quantities and I could smell Ucchan cooking downstairs. Great! Oh well, it would be a good idea to feed Ryoga too, so I woke him up as well. He seemed kind of sulky as I led him downstairs. Ucchan looked as if she hadn't slept a wink. She seemed to be moving listlessly as she cooked breakfast.

"Hey Ucchan!" I tried to sound cheerful, but the look on her face made me wanna cry.

"Breakfast is almost ready. Cooking seems to be all I'm good at." She muttered half-heartedly. P – chan looked sullen, pouting as he waited for breakfast to be made. What struck me as odd was that he was clutching a blanket. If they were having a relapse then I needed to hurry over there right this minute. I apologized for running out on breakfast, but this took precedence over even my belly. She seemed so sad about it though that I gave her a hug and a kiss on the forehead. What brought on that kiss I have no idea, but it felt good. She seemed to perk up somewhat, going from doom to merely gloom. I couldn't do that for Ryoga, but the food he was scarfing seemed to have him calmed down. It occurred to me briefly that the antidote should have worked, must be a delay on it. I took off across the rooftops to the Tendo Dojo to see Nabiki and find out what she learned. The only problem with my plan was what if I ran into Akane? It was a Sunday and the middle girl usually slept in late so I was guaranteed to find her in her room. The morning was a bit warm so it wasn't a surprise when I found her window to open. It was the matter of only seconds to get inside and over to her bed. I debated about any number of tactics I could use and fell upon one that worked on Akane. I blew lightly across the back of her neck, using the Soul of Ice to cool my breath. The poor girl almost jumped out of her skin when I did that and faced me in surprise.

"R-Ranma..." she sounded breathless. That could be because I just scared her silly, but my instincts kicked in a second too late. I found myself yanked into a passionate embrace, legs wrapped around my waist and Nabiki doing her humanoid octopus impression as she tried to suck out my insides. She had my arms pinned and was vigorously trying to get the job done, but I simply used the same pressure point. One problem, it's in a compromising spot and all I had was my nose. The pressure point was effective, but in a different way then I anticipated. Akane walked in, having heard her sister struggling with something and found us in the throes of whatever and came to a reasonable assumption that even I can't fault her for.

"Ranma no hentai!" she screamed just before malleting me into orbit and out of her sister's crushing grip. I would be getting no information from her! Why did she have a relapse too? Hers lasted the longest so it should have taken awhile to build up again, at least that's what it seemed to me. Air Akane had its advantages; I reached the Cat Cafe in a fraction of the time. The building seemed too quiet; no customers seemed to be inside either. All was peaceful, but then I heard a weird sound. It sounded like a song I heard once:

In the jungle

The mighty jungle

The lion sleeps tonight...

Ya know the song I'm talkin' about, right? Somehow that scared me. I bolted inside to the most improbable sight and I prayed this wasn't going to end like I thought it would. There was Shampoo, dressed like in full battle regalia, stalking Mousse with her bonborri in hand. The blind duck was dressed in one of Shampoo's dresses and somehow looking eerily good in it. Wait a minute, Shampoo was dressed as a man and Mousse was dressed as a girl. Maybe it should end like I pictured it. I took off to find the old ghoul because now I started to realize something; it couldn't have been them unless they did this to throw suspicion off of themselves. That would be the clever thing and it made me pause. Outside the old woman's room, I heard something strange. It sounded like she was crying. This was not a normal occurrence in Nerima for the elder to be crying. I knocked on the door.

"What is it Son-in-Law?" she asked. That made me jump, how did she know I was there? Maybe she could teach me that after we got through this.

"I need to speak with you, Revered Elder." who says I know nothin' about flattery? The old woman opened the door her eyes were puffy.

"Well come in." she stepped away from the door and hopped onto the bed. Her hands folded in her lap as she sat there. I sat down on the edge after she gestured for me to do so.

"Before we get to my problems, what's wrong?" If Nabiki knew I was smarter then she thought it would give her heart failure. The withered woman smiled slightly.

"I'm dying, Ranma. I have been for some time now." she smiled somewhat serenely.

"Whaddya mean? You're gonna be around when my first kid is born I bet." I joked, maybe she'd try living just so she figure out how to abduct the kid and bring it into the tribe.

"Please, Ranma." I winced; it was bad if she used my name. "I don't expect you to marry Shampoo. I have known for some time now that you would never be together, but I wanted her to learn of the outside world. When I am gone, take care of her as you would a sister. She thinks the world of you and if it weren't for laws she would have told you herself. Please guard my dear grandchild." This was so surreal, this potion running around and Cologne dying. Dammit, I needed to ask her. I held her hand, marveling at how small they were compared to my own. She smiled wryly.

"I'll do it. I promise, but if I'm to protect her then I need to know what's going on in Nerima." the old woman looked confused so I explained everything that has been happening. When I was finished, the seemingly weak and tired woman became Cologne, Elder of the Chinese Amazons and Matriarch.

"That is a forbidden potion. It is made only with the strictest of supervision if allowed at all. The potential for mayhem is too great." something seemed to occur to her. "Show me this antidote." I did as she asked. Merely a sniff told her what she needed to know. "It was made improperly." I was about to freak out!

"So Kodachi lied to me." I said through clenched teeth. The woman rapped me on the head with her cane.

"No she didn't. It will do as she said it would and removed the symptoms, for a few hours. Once it runs its course, the symptoms return strengthened." she looked at me with concern, but I didn't really acknowledge it. If it got worse then I needed to get back there immediately!

"Ryoga and Ucchan are in danger. Shampoo and Mousse are just cross-dressing so I doubt anything bad will happen to them." I said, the elder agreed with me on that assessment. She told me to go at once back to Ucchan's. I never flew across Nerima so fast in my life, two lives hung in the balance. Ucchan was suicidal and if Ryoga killed her himself then he was dead. Potion or not, I was ready for murder. I couldn't rein in the beast and I knew it would take something big to snap me out of it. Seeing Ucchan's in flames, surrounded by the fire department and ambulances, did just that.

End Chapter 2

Author's Notes: I suppose I should warn everyone, this won't be a long story. My first attempts at any new type of writing rarely are so thank you for reading. The last chapter is coming up next so stay tuned. All right true believers, tip your waitress and ja ne!