Noah splashed the milk onto his cereal quickly, ignoring the drops that missed the bowl and taking a seat at the kitchen table. Dani and Scott were away in the city, a rare show of spontaneity from Kit's older brother ensured that he was back in Dani's good books after yet another argument. And Jude had met up with an old friend from TAFE at a bar the brothers went to last night and had gone to stay with him for a couple of days to catch up. Leaving Noah and Kit blissfully alone.

Not that they'd been making the use of it two people of their age were probably expected to. Ever since that night on the couch, Kit had slept in Noah's room. Having her curled up next to him at night had made Noah feel such a content and secure feeling that he'd never have thought possible before.

The only problem was, Noah was a guy, and as such donated a certain amount of time each day to thinking about one particular thing. A thing that, much to his protests, he and Kit had not yet done. And he was finding it increasingly difficult to just kiss. Of course, kissing was good, kissing Kit was great, but they were both adults and he felt they should have more.

Kit didn't disagree with him of course, but she just "didn't want to rush things" and so was continually brushing away his wandering hands and telling him that he wasn't allowed to do "any strenuous activities for at least two weeks, doctor's orders." This she said with a cheeky and teasing smile on her face; oh how much better girls were at waiting than guys. She also secretly loved the fact that he wanted her so much, and was nowhere near as good at hiding it as she was.

So Noah had resigned himself to it. Besides, he couldn't help but agree with wanting to do things right. He didn't want to rush things, he'd learnt that lesson with Hayley and he didn't want to do anything that might lead him to lose Kit now. And, Kit continually assured him, it would make it all the more special in the end.

Aside from this, the new couple had been getting on famously and were loving spending so much time together and not having to deny their feelings any longer; it was a huge relief, one that gave them a big surge of happiness.

Eventually though, being pretty much confined to four walls and only occasionally making it to The Diner had started to get to Noah. Whenever he wasn't with Kit he'd been increasingly plagued with boredom, and he was sure that he'd developed a repetitive strain injury from too much Playstation. He longed for the surf and to take his bike for a spin – another forbidden thing. Jude had confiscated his keys to avoid any temptation, much to Noah's disgust. A couple of days ago the youngest Lawson brother had announced that he was going for a walk… in just his boardies, and was quickly made to go and sit on the sofa by a very assertive Kit before he even touched his surf board.

Now that those two weeks were up, however, Noah couldn't wait to grab his board and ride the waves that he sorely missed. So had gotten up early, waking an extremely grumpy Kit in the process, and was currently shovelling his breakfast down his throat faster than was humanly possible.

Kit rolled over and looked at her alarm clock – 6.30AM. She groaned and rolled back on to her side, it was far too early in the morning to be woken by a very over-eager boyfriend, and she only had to be at Uni at 12.

After a few seconds of trying and failing to get comfy again, she sighed, admitted defeat, and started to shift the warm duvet from herself. Having already been woken up, and losing the comfy place that she'd had snuggled up to her boyfriend, Kit decided that she may as well get up, she had something important to tell Noah before he left anyway. But she wasn't going to do it happily, some private consolation.

She wearily made her way down The Palace's spiral staircase, rubbing her face with the palm of her hand as she did so. Looking into the kitchen, she noticed Noah already half way through breakfast and laughed quietly to herself. He'd practically shot out of bed as soon as he woke up. She knew how excited he was about being able to surf again and found it extremely cute.

"Hey surfer boy" She sat down next to him, pausing his relentless assault on the sides of his cereal bowl long enough for him to plant a quick milky tasting kiss on her lips. Kit smiled, looking at her still new enough to be called new boyfriend.

"What?" he asked her.

"Nothing," Kit answered softly, "I just never thought I'd actually not mind being woken up this early by someone."

Noah laughed, and flashed her a cheeky grin. After swallowing his mouthful of food, he replied, "Yeah, sorry about that. But hey, it's probably for the best that I did, first day of Uni and all, you want to make a good impression, and lateness is the first sign of a failing student."

"And when did you become so rule abiding?" scoffed Kit.

"I'm in my third year now Katherine, my behaviour will set the example for the rest of the student body."

"Excuse me Mr Dean..." Kit started mockingly, "But don't you think that skipping lectures on your first day back is a bit of a bad way to set this example?"

Noah smiled sarcastically, "I have to work. And seriously though, I know you, and you would have been snoring 'till way past the time you were supposed to be if I hadn't woke you up now."

"No I would not!" Kit replied incredulously, "And I do not snore!"

Noah laughed perhaps a little too loudly, "Kit you snore like an elephant with a rope tied around its trunk!"

Kit's mouth dropped, her eyes turning from playful to devious in an instant. "I resent that. Anyway, you wouldn't be able to sleep in the same room as me if I was that bad."

"I'm becoming immune to it."

"I do not snore!"

"You do!" Noah laughed more and on finishing his cereal, reached for a piece of buttered toast from his plate.

Kit snatched the plate away before he had the chance to get any, knowing full well how easy it was to bribe her boyfriend with food when he was particularly hungry.

"Hey!" Noah protested, as Kit teasingly put the toast to her mouth as if to eat it.

"Admit that I don't snore and you can have it back," Kit challenged, a glint in her eye.

"But you do!" Kit moved the toast closer to her mouth.

"Okay, okay," Noah reasoned, "you don't snore."

"Thank you," replied Kit triumphantly, handing him back his toast.

"…much," Noah muttered under his breath. For this he received a playful slap on the arm from Kit, "I heard that."

As Noah took the last bite of his toast, Kit remembered what she wanted to speak to him about, a smile spread across her face. "Hey…" she started.

"Yeah."

"Tonight… you'll definitely be home by seven wont you?"

Noah nodded. "Why?"

"Absolutely definitely?"

"Yeah, why?"

"Well… it's just… Dani and Scott are still in the city for a few more days and Jude's still at his friends place right? So I just thought we could do something together," she said innocently, but with a coy smile. She kissed him and waited for a reply.

"Sure," Noah decided with a cheeky grin, getting up and making his way to the door. "What exactly do you have in mind?"

"It's a surprise," she told him. "You'll see when you get home." Her voice still had that usually cheeky and unusually coy tone to it, "two weeks are up…" she added as he went out the door.

Outside Noah stopped for a moment, still grinning, and trying to work out what his girlfriends last comment meant. Then the penny dropped and an even bigger and even cheekier grin broke over his face. He could hardly wait for tonight.


Kirsty sat beside her boyfriends bed, absentmindedly flicking through the pages of a magazine that she'd already read more than three times, and which was getting no more interesting on this occasion either. Kane's injuries had been healing well, and the doctors had even said that he might be able to go home soon. But he was getting increasingly moody and frustrated at being kept in the same place for a long period of time, and had begun to snap at his girlfriend. So much so, that on more than one occasion Kirsty had found herself making excuses to go back to the hotel. She'd tried to talk to him of course, but he just shrugged her off and told her that he was "fine".

He was awake now, but the couple had been sitting in complete silence for more than half an hour. Kane looked up from the page of his equally boring magazine that he'd read more than five times to his glass of water on his bedside table. After eyeing it for a moment and building himself up for the movement, he reached forward for it, trying to ignore the increasingly agonising blunt pain that gripped his back as he leant further down towards it. Kirsty looked up from her magazine as she heard a muffled groan of pain – a failed attempt to hide it. Kane's fingers were stretching as far as they could get towards the glass, the muscles on his arm were overly tensed and his face was red and strained with the effort. He couldn't reach any further.

Seeing what he was trying to get, Kirsty immediately took hold of the glass and held it towards him. He shakily took it off her and just about managed to force a "thanks" through gritted teeth. It was only a small thing, just a glass of water, but it was a defeat nonetheless, yet another thing to remind him of how pathetic he currently was. Inside he knew that Kirsty only wanted to help, and hadn't just done it to annoy him, but he didn't like her having to help him all the time. He didn't like being dependant on someone; he didn't like having to rely on someone. He hated it.

Kirsty sighed angrily at Kane's reaction to her offer of help. She just didn't understand why he was getting so uptight about it. All she wanted to do was help him, because she loved him. Why wouldn't he let her? Why did he keep shutting her out?

After a few more minutes of sitting in tense silence, Kirsty could take it no longer and announced that she was going for a cup of coffee. Kane watched her go as far as he could before the door shut behind her, blocking his view. He knew that he couldn't go on like this, hardly speaking to her. It was only making the situation even harder. He didn't want to lose her; he couldn't bear to lose her. But he knew he would if he kept pushing her away.

He shifted slightly on the cushion he was leaning against, sighing aggressively. He couldn't get comfy; the skin on his back was not yet fully healed and so apart from itching like hell, it made it very difficult for him to rest his back against anything without experiencing pain or discomfort. This only added to his frustration, the little things building up and really beginning to grate. Moving himself into a different position again, and still feeling uncomfortable, he had to really try not to snap and smash something. He felt the anger rising up inside his body, red frustration surging through his veins. If he didn't release it soon, if the pressure kept on building, then he would explode. And that, Kane knew from experience, could have dire consequences.


Jude looked around The Diner for someone he knew. His eyes came to rest on his brother, sat having his lunch in the corner booth. He walked over to him and sat opposite. "Hey little bro."

Noah looked at Jude with a confused frown on his face. "I thought you were staying at your mates 'till tomorrow?"

Jude folded his arms on the table and stretched his shoulders, noting the part confused, part annoyed, part hopeful and part devastated look he was getting from his brother. Slightly defensively, he replied, "Yeah, I was going to, but something came up and he had to leave town for a while, so…" He shrugged his shoulders as Noah's face visibly fell, his insides pitifully crumbling into despair. "Why?" Jude asked, "You don't mind me staying do you? If it's that much trouble I can…"

"No," Noah stopped him, "Its not that. Its just…" he hesitated and shuffled awkwardly. Jude nodded for him to continue. "…me and Kit, we kinda wanted the place to ourselves tonight, y'know."

"Ahhhh," clocked Jude, in an annoying big brother kind of way, "place to yourselves eh." Noah rolled his eyes, and silently pleaded for his brother to say what he wanted to hear.

Jude chuckled at his brother's expression, "Well I suppose I could make myself scarce for one more night."

Noah's face lit up, "Sweet," he took another bite of his burger.

Jude, being an older sibling, couldn't help but wind his little brother up a bit in this particular situation. "Now listen Noah," Jude started, in a much louder than average voice, trying to keep the smile off his face at his bro's 'please shut up now' reaction. Jude was in lecture tone, Noah hated lecture tone. He continued, "this is a big step in your relationship, and you need to make sure that you're… careful about it. You need to use the right…"

Feeling annoyance that his brother could still torment him so easily even now and embarrassment at the whole Diner hearing their conversation rise in him Noah couldn't bear it any longer and cut him off. "Jude for Gods sake I'm twenty one years old, what do you think I am, a virgin!" Noah failed to hide the annoyance from his voice and Jude laughed, noticing Colleen lingering in their area, eyebrows raised, absorbing any free gossip and tutting at 'those young people today with no respect'.

"Oh, I know you're not little brother, on account of the fact that you slept with my girlfriend." A blunter and harsher than intended statement, but true nonetheless.

Noah's face turned from slight-annoyance to guilty, hurt and sorry in an instant and he looked down at his meal, not wanting to make eye contact. Even now he still felt guilty about it. It had been a mistake, Holly had been one of the biggest mistakes of his life – and he had made a lot of mistakes. Sure he was only a kid, but he still knew what he was doing, knew how much it would hurt his brother, and Jude would never do that to him. It was one of the things that he regretted more than anything, and the thing that had almost cost him the one person who had and would always be there for him, no matter what. If he was honest with himself, he was still scared that Jude might suddenly realise what a lousy thing he did and never speak to him again.

Jude had only meant it as a gentle dig, but from his brothers reaction, he knew he had gone much too far; he'd managed to turn a perfectly easy and banter filled conversation into a very uneasy and difficult one. "Sorry," he said quietly, hoping to forget it, "that was uncalled for."

Noah looked up, "No, I'm sorry."

"Mate, it's alright now, we sorted it, I'm over it, forget it." Sure, the revelation had hurt Jude at the time, really hurt, but he'd managed to forgive his brother and had moved on. "Look, she came on to you, and you were sixteen, you were just a kid, and she was twenty four, you can't carry that guilt around with you forever. So forget it okay, Holly was crazy anyway, forget it."

Noah looked into his brother's eyes and on seeing that Jude really had forgiven him, replied, "Okay." Then added, with a chuckle that didn't really fit, "and I seem to have that effect on women."

Jude nodded and then looked confused, so Noah expanded a little, "mum."

The older man's eyebrows rose in shock, he was sure that they'd got past all of this. "Bro, how Jill was wasn't your fault, don't ever think that okay." Jude could read Noah better than anyone, and was worried to see a look in his eyes that he didn't quite understand (or didn't want to), like he needed to tell him something, something big.

After a few seconds of tense silence, Jude spoke again, his voice totally sincere. "Look Noah… we're brothers yeah, we're tight, and no-one is ever gunna change that, ever." Noah nodded, he knew it was true deep down. They exchanged a look of understanding and both felt a little more comfortable.

After a while Noah went back to his burger and chips and reabsorbed himself in his thoughts of Kit. Jude mirrored Kit's actions earlier in the morning and just stared at Noah.

"What?"

Jude half smiled, "You've really fallen for her haven't you."

Noah nodded, "She makes me happy, really really happy."

"I'm glad," Jude replied, "For a while there I thought you'd be hung up on Hayley forever, and I know I'm bias and everything but she really wasn't worth it." He got up from his seat and turned to leave. "Good luck with tonight." Jude winked, and left his brother with a very big grin on his face.


"Hey." The hospital door swung to a close behind Kirsty. After taking the time to think things through at her hotel, she'd realised that the only thing that mattered was that she loved Kane and he loved her; anything else could be worked through as long as they had that.

Kane put his fork down on his plate and turned to his girlfriend. Her reply came as the rattle of metal against cheap plastic. Ignoring the pangs of disappointment that she felt, she moved and sat down into her seat, "Kane…"

She stopped; she didn't know what to say, and why should she be the one to say something anyway? Things between them seemed different somehow, and why? What was it that had caused this tension? What thing had one of them said or done? What one incident had made them so strangely uncomfortable with each other? She threw a hand to her forehead and clutched a few strands of hair loosely in despair, her shoulders sinking as she breathed out deeply.

Kane looked at her, nursing her head in her hand; he loved her, he knew that much. But something was different now, there was a barrier between them, and he didn't have a clue what it was. He returned to his food – cold mashed potato and a few soggy slithers of beef, quite reflective of his mood, and their relationship. He dug his fork into the potato and brought it up towards his mouth, every mouthful an effort, an agony. The movement stretching the still healing skin across his shoulder and scratching at the nerve endings.

The tense silence hung over them once more. Each absorbed in their own thoughts, but each also painfully aware of the harsh atmosphere that enveloped them.

Kane felt that all too familiar frustration rise in him again, biting down on his lip hard. Her breathing audible over the silence, screeching into his ears like shards. The bland and slightly sickening taste of the mashed potato hung in his mouth, each determined effort to make the taste stronger grating harder and harder at his skin; another silent battle with himself. His muscles ached with the strain and his hand began to shake. Kirsty could hear his teeth grind together slightly; she closed her eyes and tried shake off the overwhelming urge to help. She failed.

"Kane, let me…"

A mistake.

She took hold of his hand with the fork in it and moved it for him.

Another.

Before she had even finished the sentence, Kane had snatched his hand away sharply.

"I can do it myself Kirst!" he half-shouted and half-spat at her.

The built up rage overflowed as he grabbed the plate in both hands and launched it into the air. Kirsty flinched at the sound of the cheap plastic shattering and the metal fork chipping the wall as it struck it and crashed to the ground, leaving gravy and cold mashed potato lashed across the floor.

Both of them froze in the silence that followed. Their bodies trembling, breathing shaky, and minds trying to comprehend what had just happened.

Without meaning to, Kirsty took two steps away from Kane; she was scared of him, scared of him for the first time in a long while. It took this for Kane to break out of his daze and realise what he'd just done, it didn't matter about the plate, it was what he'd done to Kirsty that killed him, he saw it in her eyes. It was a look that he'd seen far too often on his mothers face as a child, and he hated himself for it. He'd promised himself that he would never hurt her, and now he'd gone back on his word.

"I'm sorry, Kirst please…" his voice was the most desperate Kirsty had ever heard, but she couldn't stop, she couldn't say it was okay. She took a few more steps back towards the door, unable to stop the tears from falling.

"Kirst…" his voice cracked through the stillness, choked over emotion. She turned and ran, out the door, down the hallway, and outside, not stopping when she heard him cry her name – an anguished scream.

"KIRSTY!"

Kane tried to go after her but was crippled with even more pain. Instead he grabbed the water from his bedside and threw that against the wall too, then anything he could grab hold of. Blood pumped hard in his ears and under his skull, so that it felt as if he would burst. He flailed his arms madly, punching anything that got in his way – the pillow, the table, his own body; now oblivious to the physical pain.

He carried on thrashing his anger out until he had no more strength left in his body. A single tear squeezed through the creases of his eyelids and trickled down his tensed scarlet face. He held his head in his hands and finally let go, rocking back and forth in agony. He cried his tears into his hands, flooding himself with too many emotions. He cried for Kirsty. Cried for himself, for his scars. For his dad, his mum, for Scott. For crying, for being a 'pathetic little bastard', for giving in.

The plate was only a little thing, just one incident that would barely register in his memories. But these little things, you see, they all mount up.


6.50PM

Kit smiled apprehensively as she surveyed the dimly lit room, hers and Noah's. It had taken her hours to get everything done, and now that it was almost ready she was beginning to get nervous. She chuckled at herself and shook her head as she struck yet another match, "I can't believe I'm going to this much trouble for a guy."

She'd been shopping that afternoon and bought everything she'd need. The candles were now positioned with very un-Kit-like precision around the room – on the wardrobe, the windowsill, the bedside tables, and some casually placed on the floor. Some lightly scented but most just ordinary tee lights. Now that they were all lit and casting a warm, romantic glow over the room, Kit was beginning to wonder if she'd bought too many.

Blowing out the final match, she opened the pack of rose petals and threw them loosely over the bed and the floor. The deep red contrasting nicely with the purplish material of the fresh bed linen, which Kit had washed herself that morning. She'd tidied the room and routed out an old present from someone that she thought she'd never use – massage oils – probably from Dani. She chuckled again, purple wasn't a Kit thing, neither were massage oils, or rose petals, and they weren't exactly Noah's style either. But she wanted everything to be perfect, and sometimes perfection requires you to try something new.

Straightening the material across one of the pillows slightly, she glanced around her masterpiece. After a moment, she smiled to herself, finally happy and feeling excitement bubbling inside her. The room was sorted, she was sorted, dinner was cooking downstairs and Noah was going to be here in less than ten minutes.

Taking a deep breath, she walked over to her full-length mirror, something that she had done far too many times tonight already. Looking at herself stood in the now finished room, her face faintly fell. As much as she hated to admit it, image had always been a problem to Kit, and now she was worried what Noah would think of her. She ran her fingers through a piece of her freshly washed and styled hair, now slightly longer and coloured a warm reddish brown, straight, just above the shoulder, and a jagged cut. It flattered her face more than her old style. She managed half a smile.

She'd actually bothered to do make up, just a touch, to accentuate her best features, not to cover her up – warm colours, to match her hair. Touching the corner of her eye to remove the only remaining imperfection, she took a step backwards, showing her whole body.

The white silk dressing gown she had on hung lightly over her body and was tied loosely at the waist, showing skin just above her knees and down her chest in a V. She loosened the tie and opened it, silently praying to look better than she did the last time she looked. She half smiled, she would do. In the warmly lit room her skin didn't look as pale as it usually did, and she had lost a bit of weight with the worrying to hell over Noah – one of the only good things to come from it. On her shopping spree earlier in the day, she had finally taken the bull by the horns and bought herself some new underwear – after going in and out of the shop enough times for the shop assistant to ask if she needed any help. She had decided on something lacy, again very un-Kit-like but she figured that Noah would like it, and besides, she did look good in it.

The black material contrasted perfectly to her newly softened pale skin. The lace on the bra showing a little flesh, but not too much, a glimpse. It fitted around her without pressing in and held everything nicely in place, giving her a hint of cleavage for the dressing gown. She had chosen french style knickers, bargaining with a thong but eventually deciding against it. They came low around her hips, with the lace pattern trailing out slightly at the top of her thighs. They hid everything she wanted them to and made her ass look more fabulous than it ever had before.

She smiled and nodded, she would do.

6.58PM

Hearing the turn of keys in the door, Kit let out a small yelp and spritzed herself with perfume quickly. Running out of the room she made one last check; she was okay, the candles were lit, curtains were drawn, petals were okay, dinner was cooking. Everything was going to be fine.

"You weren't supposed to be home for anther two minutes," she called downstairs as she quickly hopped down herself.

Noah laughed at her comment before closing the door behind him and turning around. He was about to reply to her when his eyes focused on the scene before him. His eyebrows arched and his mouth hung open.

Kit was stood, dressed in nothing more than a silk dressing gown, leaning oh so seductively and a little flustered on the doorframe, and dinner was cooking and smelling delightful.

"Hey," she spoke, moving towards him slowly, trying to bite back the nerves that were rising inside her.

She came to stop in front of him and took his keys out of his hand for him, as he seemed incapable of doing anything but staring at her. She blushed slightly and turned her head down, "Is the staring a good thing or a bad thing?"

Noah blinked hard and finally woke up from his daze, "Kit I… you… you look…" He gave up trying to find the words and tilted her head up towards him with his hand, before capturing her in one of the most passionate kissed she had ever received.

Kit brought her hand up to stroke the side of his face tenderly and relaxed into his arms around her, a feeling she was starting to get used to, and one that she loved. After a few minutes of standing in the kitchen she pulled away and broke the kiss. Only moving an inch away from him and effectively speaking into his mouth. "Dinner should be ready in a second," she spoke softly; he kissed her again before pulling away again briefly.

"So…?" he replied, cheekiness flooding his voice. Kit joined their lips again and lifted her hand to the back of his neck, pulling gently on the hairs at the back of his head, something which by now, she knew he loved. As he moved his hand up her body she didn't protest and adjusted position so they could get closer.

"Well, aren't you hungry?" she asked softly as his lips trailed down to the base of her neck, leaving gentle kissed behind. He moved his other hand under the lip of her dressing gown on her thigh and traced it up her body, his touch sending a warm feeling all the way up Kit's body. "Not for food," he replied with a small grin and brought his lips to hers again, loving the feel of her soft skin under his hand.

Despite herself, Kit giggled and started to move backwards towards the stairs. Noah needed no further encouragement and moved slowly up the stairs alongside his girlfriend, not breaking the kiss for an instant.

Kit reached behind her and turned the handle to their bedroom, the door pushed open with her back pressed against it. Noah pushed her back onto the bed and lowered himself slowly on top of her, lips still together.

Kit shuffled further up the bed so that her head was resting on the pillow and ran her warm hands up underneath his shirt, feeling the muscles on his back and stomach tense briefly at her touch. "So what do you think…?" she asked, referring to the room. She made to deepen the kiss but found him pulling away from her.

Looking up suddenly she saw his face drop and turn far too pale. He roughly pushed himself off her and stood up, his hand shaking as he put it to his head. "What… what's up…?" Kit asked, pleaded, feeling suddenly cold without the warmth of his body pressed against hers.

Noah looked at her and shook his head in disbelief, hurt and anger rising inside him. He had trusted her, how stupid was he? "Is this supposed to be funny!" he shouted. Kit wrapped her arms around herself for comfort; feeling more confused than she had ever been before. Noah's breathing was beginning to get very rapid, and he was shaking more. Before Kit even had the chance to say something he ran out of the room, down the stairs, and out the door. Leaving a shattered Kit to cry helplessly on the bed, curled up tight into a ball and flinching at the sound of the door slamming shut. She had trusted him.

Outside, Noah failed to stop the tears from cascading down his face as the harsh air hit his skin. He sank to his knees and held his head in his hands as he wept. He had trusted her. His head whirled with images and voices, the candles around the room burning into his mind and flooding it with memories of his past, of his mum, demons once forgotten now horrifyingly relived.


Woah! That was a way long chapter. I'm not totally happy with it but, well, I never am. And don't worry, next chapter there'll be reconciliations all round... or will there... cackle.
Jess: Glad you liked it hun :) and Stacy: Thanks so much for the review, I'm really glad you're enjoying it.