Something Corporate

Chapter 7:

When Marik and Bakura got back from their game, they found that Pips, Ryou and Malik had hired a bunch of people actually worthy of their time. It was only about a hundred or so, but it was better than nothing. So, Marik and Malik had the base of their sales force and congratulated all of them on being hired.

Both Bakura and Ryou were given special positions at Ishtar Industries. Pips had totally objected to the job that Marik wanted to give Bakura, which was the assistant. Once everything was decided, Bakura was given the position of Receptionist/ Secretary. And as for Ryou… he was the Mascot.

Of course, they couldn't handle all these people inside their house. So, they had to get a headquarters somewhere else. It just so happened that there was a building across town that was perfect. Pips bought it and they moved right on in.

"Oh, this is so wonderful!" Malik exclaimed when all the moving was done, "This place has a nice vibe."

"Yes, yes. This is a very nice building, and you'll be right across town from the Kaiba Corp headquarters." Pips looked out the window, "As a matter-of-fact… I think your office is in the same place as Mr. Kaiba's."

Marik nodded and whipped out a telescope, "Exactly. Now, I can see what the competition is doing!"

"Oh, Marik, give the guy some privacy! I mean, goodness, if he finds out you're spying on him, he'll have a fit."

"Kaiba always has fits. I might as well give him a reason to whine and moan."

Marik and Malik's office was the one that they were standing in. They decided it would be more fun if they shared the same room. But Malik's side was a bit more decorative. He had big plants surrounding his desk, a birdbath on his side of the window, and leopard print wallpaper.

"Malik, couldn't you have decorated your side… better?" Marik asked.

"What do you mean? This is the pinnacle of fashion."

"It's disturbing."

"It's fabulous."

"Hey guys," Bakura came into the office, dressed up in a dark blue business suit and smiling, "Don't I look spiffy? Pips got me this. He said all the leather just wasn't professional. I don't know why, though… leather is all Kaiba wears."

Marik snorted, "Pips has the right idea! There'll be no Kaiba-conformity at Ishtar Industries! Not while I'm alive."

"Anyway, my office rocks! It has videogames." Bakura pointed towards the door, "And you should see Ryou. He looks awesome."

"Marik!" Ryou ran into the office, "Marik! Marik! Marik!"

He turned around, "What is it- Ooh! Ryou, you got the costume! Wow… you look good."

"I do not!" Since Ryou was the official Mascot of Ishtar Industries, and Marik was the official president of Ishtar Industries… Marik thought it would be cool to have Ryou wearing a Marik costume. With the hair and everything. The only part of Ryou you could see was his face, deep inside the mouth of the costume. "I look awful!"

"What're you complaining about, Ryou? It's very… becoming." Malik stifled his laughs and giggles.

He turned to his yami, "Bakura, you all get business suits and I get stuck in this!"

"Hey!" Pips pouted, "Do you know how hard it was for me to knit that in such a short amount of time! I had to use a picture of Marik for a model, because the real one was busy."

Ryou tried to scratch his body, but he was entirely covered in Marik, "But it itches! It itches!"

"Well, of course, it itches. Halfway through it, I ran out of wool. So, I used eyebrows and eyelashes as substitutes."

"Oh, dear, can't I take it off!"

Marik shook his head, "Sorry, Ryou. But if we have to be seen in public, we have to have our Mascot with us. You have to wear it 24/7."

"Oh, woe is me!"

-

Meanwhile, across town, at the Kaiba Corporation headquarters, Kaiba had been working for a while but then he noticed something out the window and decided to check it out.

He took out his trusty telescope and looked on the other side of town at the tall building, directly across from his. It'd been empty for about two years and all of a sudden, there were people going in and out.

The thing that he found most interesting was the amount of people in the front room on one of the top floors. He couldn't put his finger on it, but there was something familiar about them…

"Marik? Malik?" Kaiba said aloud, doing a double take, "It can't be!"

"Seto, will you stop being such a peeping tom? What people do behind closed doors is their own business. You are just too nosy." Mokuba was sitting in his brother's chair, working on the computer. "Remember what happened last time?"

"Those charges were dropped!" He continued to peep through the blinds, "And anyway, I think Marik and Malik have taken over that building over there."

"Well, you said they were starting a large company, right? They can't do that at home."

"I-I didn't know they'd actually take it this far. I thought they'd just sell a little cocaine on the side then it'd be over. Hmm…"

"Oh?" Mokuba turned around to look at his brother, "I see what's going on here."

"What? What!"

He grinned, "You're all nervous, now, aren't ya, Seto?"

"I'm not nervous! I'm just suspicious. I mean, they haven't even made their product known to the public. But they must be selling it somehow. Oh well. I'm sure it's stupid… like mechanical sandwiches or something."

"Don't jinx yourself. Mechanical sandwiches could be the next big thing."

"Ha. That'll be the day." He put the telescope away and leaned on the side of the desk, "If Marik and Malik ever actually come up with something useful, I'll run over to them and become their janitor."

-

"Okay, everyone, I have an announcement to make!" Pips stood in the middle of Marik and Malik's office while everyone that surrounded him was chattering and giggling.

But once they looked at him, the talking died down, "Good. Well, as you all know, we've been selling the Miniport through the Blackmarket website for the past month or so. But now that we have an actual window to the world, so to speak, I think it's high time that we introduced the Miniport into the mainstream."

Everybody cheered and smiled.

"Is that alright with you?" He looked at Marik and Malik.

"Sure." Marik nodded, "Whatever makes us better than Kaiba Corp."

"We'll be the biggest corporation ever!" Malik added. "… I wonder if Kaiba's even seen our product. We should give him one."

"What! Why?"

"Well, he was the one who gave us the startup money. Without him, none of this would be possible. Shouldn't we thank him?"

Marik sat at his desk, "We'll thank him by letting him see that we're seriously after his reputation. Don't forget why we did this in the first place, Malik. We're proving to the world that no one is smarter than us."

There were chuckles and stifled laughs in the room.

Marik glared at them, "And what, pray tell, is so funny!"

"S-Sorry sir." They apologized, "We thought you were making a joke."

Pips walked over to Marik and motioned for Malik to join him, "Okay, guys, since we're going to have to package the Miniports and ship them around the world in order to sell them, there's one more thing we'll need."

"Which is?"

"Just like any other product out there, ours will have to come with a guide."

They looked at each other, "… Guide?"

"A manual, you know. To tell them how to use it." Pips sighed, "And you two are the only ones that know how to use it."

"Oh, Ra, why!" Marik screamed. "Why me!"

"Alright, everyone, out you go." he scooted the other people out of the room and closed the door behind himself.

Marik slapped his forehead, "What do we do now?"

Malik scratched his head, "We knew we'd have to figure out how to do this someday. I mean, you can't expect someone to open their new Miniport and automatically know how to use it."

"I know." He tapped his chin with his index finger, "… You'll have to do most of it, though. You've had the most experience with it. I mean, you transported from Kaiba's office and back, right?"

"Yeah, but I didn't know what I was doing. I just got lucky."

He took out a piece of paper and a pen from his desk, "Okay, Malik, just explain to me what you did. And we'll… map it out."

"Well…"

When Malik had explained everything to Marik, he didn't really understand. So they used Malik's Miniport and fiddled with it for a while. After six hours and thirty minutes of painstaking note taking and trying to take it apart, they wanted to give up. And of course, Marik got electrified before they actually stopped (typical). They still didn't have the necessary notes for a manual.

So, they decided to ask the Miniport's actual creator. Elmer Fizz. They looked him up in the phonebook and dialed his number.

"Remember, Malik," Marik whispered as his hikari was waiting for the ringing to stop, "Disguise your voice. He might remember you."

Malik nodded and someone picked up the phone, "Hello?" They asked.

"Um, yes." He lowered his voice, so he sounded like a lumberjack, "Is this Mr. Elmer Fizz on the line?"

"It is. Who is this?"

"Um! I-It's… Mike Tyson. You've just… won a contest!"

"Oh, really!" Elmer was obviously excited.

"Yes. You just have to answer a few questions and-"

"What's the prize?"

"…Huh?"

"The prize, if I answer the question correctly, what is it?"

Malik had to think quickly, "Y-You get a… date! With me!"

"Ooh. Okay, I'm game. Give me the question, Mr. Tyson."

"Tell me everything you know about how to operate your latest invention, the Miniport." Malik had to add, "The Miniport that I know nothing about!"

"Whoop. Man, that's a toughie…" But when Elmer did answer, Malik put him on speakerphone and Marik wrote it all down. They hung up on him when he asked: When's our date, Mike? Can I call you Mike?

When the manual was all written, it was around midnight or a little after. Before Marik and Malik went home, they stopped off at Pip's apartment and handed him the manual. Pips made them say goodnight to Rupert, then they toddled on home.