Dear Hermione,

Oh good, that was a relief reading that I don't have to listen to girl troubles. I definitely don't want to hear about how "cute that boy is" or "when the pad's a-rocking, don't come a-knocking". I've just completely frightened myself with that thought. EW. Female things. I AM NOT FEMININE! THOSE RUFFLES ON MY DRESS ROBE MEANT NOTHING! (Besides, Harry is the one who spends more time in front of the mirror than me, so HA!)

I do not make a fuss about him. It's just that you're constantly talking about him, and to him I'll bet. You've probably written twice as many letters to him as to me. I won't get used to him. You can't make me like someone. So who DO you fancy, eh?

I'm only saying that not everything is peachy keen, alright? You are the pessimist. You find something to complain about all the time. Hermione the Whiny. Oh damn... you're going to kill me now, aren't you!

Yet money wouldn't hurt every now and then. You don't know how hard it is to watch my parents have to scrap together every year around the start of term for our books and supplies. It just makes me feel like such a burden. Really. With so many kids, it's hard not to feel like an unnecessary limb. OH, and how's this for keen, Percy's left. He's up and gone. He and my parents had a falling out. What did I tell you Herms? I can't believe he's done this to us. Bloody hell.

I don't want to fight anymore. I've had enough of that for the past few days.

Alright, I do like your hair, but nothing else, since that alone covers the rest of your features. Oh right, I don't want to fight. I'm sorry I'm so irritating all of the time. You're really too good to put up with it. I don't want you to have to put up with this month's Me, because I'm warning you, it's going to be an unpleasant ride. I haven't been very good company at home. For once, I'm making more noise than the ghoul upstairs and almost as much damage as Fred and George. I do hereby give you permission to bail. I don't care. Go on if you don't feel like listening to my swear up a storm.

So who DO you fancy then! You said you can't tell the person, so tell me. Just, er, call it curiousity.

Am not.

Always,

Ron