Chapter 21: Sweet Nothings to Hold

Raven woke, her eyes fluttering open painfully. She vaguely recalled their escapade in the portal and she shuddered. Propping herself up, she found no pain in her limbs and lifted a brow in surprise. "Beast Boy?" she murmured to the sleeping form draped across her. The changeling shifted slightly. Raven nudged him gently. The boy's forest green pools snapped wide and he bolted upright. Raven suppressed a sound of surprise but none the less, she scrambled back with a start.

"Raven! I mean… Capria… are you ok?" he asked anxiously. Raven nodded, gaping in awe at the boy.

"You're not hurt?" she asked, eyeing him warily. Beast Boy shook his head vigorously. She allowed herself a relieved smile and pulled him into her embrace. Beast Boy was shocked by the display but did nothing to stop her. After a moment he wrapped his arms around her as well. Raven gazed off, a strand of her hair falling over her eyes. She shook the violet strands off. Wait. Her hair. Violet? Raven pulled away and grabbed her black bag from the ground. Searching through the sack she found her mirror. Pulling it forth she gave a small cry of shock. Her eyes and hair were both of their original indigo color. Raven swallowed hard and looked up at Beast Boy who was simply staring after her. Forest green met amethyst. He smiled a soft, genuine smile.

"You're back. You're back again," he said softly, running a hand through her silky locks. Trigon had been weakened by her love. Raven felt an uncharacteristic smile spread across her face.

"I'm back," she echoed, nodding. "I'm really back," her eyes closed, as if trying to savor having her body back. Her physical self was no longer under Trigon's influence. The happenings with Lark could never happen again without some consent from her. And Raven would not allow that. She would never lend herself to Trigon's whims without a fight. The empath took a deep breath and stared out into the black sky. She shivered and turned to Beast Boy who was rubbing his arms for warmth. "You're cold," she observed quietly. Raven felt strange, hearing the affection lacing her own words. Beast Boy nodded meekly.

"A little." He looked off in the same direction as Raven had. He narrowed his eyes and his brows furrowed. A glimmer of scarlet had caught his eye. He watched with fearful curiosity as it widened. "What is that?" he asked, pointing to the widening ring of scarlet. Raven turned, with a rustle of silk, to look in the indicated direction. The pale girl's lips pressed into a thin line as four jagged rings of scarlet created an even larger ring in the black sky.

"Those are the four rings of Ferna. They're black holes… big ones. They surround Latsiere. The red… well. Trigon's part of this whole curse, ya know?" she gave a bitter laugh. Beast Boy nodded slowly.

"We going in there?" he asked, eyeing the black holes. Raven was quiet and they watched with nausea as a brilliant star streaked through the sky and was sucked into one of the black holes with a bone-rattling explosion.

"Yeah… we're going in there," she murmured with a slight wince. Beast Boy's face set.

"When?"

"Whenever you're ready," she replied. She glanced furtively down at her black bag, the tiny book within seemed to burn into her mind. The words rang as a harsh whisper in her head over and over again. Beast Boy stared at the ominous black spots, his eyes flickering every once in a while to the Trigonic red rings around them. "But… we have to leave within the next twelve hours. Iris gets lethally hot every twelve hours. It's a cycle," she added.

"Let's go. Now." He said firmly. Raven's eyes met his again, her gaze searching his soul. A well of tears sprang to her eyes and she bit her lower lip, forcing them back. Almost time. "I want this to be over. I want you to be safe," he murmured. The girl nodded quietly.

"Ok," she whispered.

"Ok," he responded. Raven moved and placed a light hand on his shoulder. She gave a final glance to the boy whom she loved and wondered once more how inevitable fate had to be. Could it not be changed? Star had said that. That she thought the future could be changed. Raven supposed sometimes… it could be changed. But not this time. Not for her. Not for a selfish daughter of hell. For that was all she was. This glance was the final she could give before she was bound to her decision, body, heart, and soul. Raven allowed a single tear to slip down her cheek. Pure. A tiny diamond shed from a demon's eyes. All she was… it was all encompassed in that tiny tear, which trickled down her cheek and fell upon Beast Boy's hand. Then, Raven decided to do it for him. She could not change the course which she had chosen to follow. She could not change the horror she had decided to obey.

But she could give him one thing. Raven smiled. Not like any of the other times. Not a half-hearted smile that allowed the others to know she had some form of feeling. Not a malicious smirk. Not a sadistic grin. But a wide and genuine smile that lit her violet eyes afire with a golden glow. And that smile, she gave to Beast Boy. He stared back at her, his gaze unwavering, and he felt his heart swell. She'd given that to him. Raven closed her eyes and the smile faded from her face. Her gaze reopened but in a blinding white, their bodies encompassed in black aura.

"AZERATH!" Raven yelled to the heavens. "METRION!" the black aura began to quiver and vibrate with power. Beast Boy felt blood drip from his shoulder where her nails dug into his skin. "LATSIERE!" the ebony around them swelled and caved like some deathly living thing and Beast Boy felt fire shoot up his limbs. Raven bit back a scream of pain. "ZINTHOS!" An ear-shattering explosion rocked through them and the two felt their limbs being torn apart. They were twisted and pulled in every which direction, their very souls clamoring to be free of their bodies. The black encompassed them fully and formed a huge black bird, a searing red eye blazing. Raven felt the black raven embedded on her neck begin to throb and burn. White tendrils seemed to flare out of the huge black raven, creating massive arches of white fire across the wings and tail of the bird. Huge wing beats carried the screaming body of magic at rocket speed towards the black holes. One of the four began to swell and a terrifying amount of gravitational pull began to drag the mentally created bird into its timeless depths.

Raven felt her mind being torn from her skull, the excruciating pain numbing her body and terrorizing her into convulsions. Beast Boy became aware of a rushing sound similar to an infinitely large tornado blaring in his ears. He clutched his head, ignoring the stings of pain Raven's hand on his shoulder were bringing. It was for Raven. All this pain was for Raven. The bird looked about to die into the black hole when it crackled with a blinding white and took the form of a glowing white dove. The dove flared its large white wings and buffeted against the black hole. With a splay of the tail and wings, the dove plunged through the very center of the hole. A flash reverberated through the heavens.

Raven was bombarded with the sensation of free fall and her eyes snapped out of their whitened state. Her wide violet eyes sought out Beast Boy, who was gasping for breath and staring at her. Raven looked down and saw, far away, the ground rushing to meet them.

"Azerath, Metrion, Zinthos!" her powers crackled at her finger tips and failed. Latsiere's surface was racing to meet them.

Save her. The same voice that had spoken to Beast Boy during the realm breach returned. Beast Boy instantaneously responded, taking the form of a large eagle, he grasped Raven's shoulders in his talons and with furious wing beats, brought them to a safe land. Raven lay panting on the ground, a hand to her head. Tell her of me. Tell her she succeeded. Tell her she released the Dawn Goddess. The voice breathed. Beast Boy swallowed and reached out to Raven, shifting to his human form.

"R-Capria. You… the voice said…" he stuttered. Raven turned to face him. He felt a pang of hurt sweep through him. Why did she look at him that way? As if… his presence pained her.

"Yes?" she managed a steady voice. Beast Boy swallowed again.

"In… the realm breach… there was a voice before you saved me. The voice came back. Told me to tell you… you released the Dawn Goddess… that's sorta like… what Star told you to do too…huh," he gave her a dazed smile, his head lolling back. Then he lost consciousness. Raven stared in slight horror at the boy. Her mother's spirit. She'd released her mother's spirit.

"Don't see this, mom," she whispered. Of all that could have seen this betrayal, the only ones who would ever know were Trigon, Arella, and herself… and of course… Beast Boy. But that… wasn't even a thought. Raven stood pointedly, the shock of the fall had worn off. Raven frowned. Her powers had not worked. Was it because… yes. That would be why. Raven bit her lip. The young empath took in her surroundings. A bleak and nearly formless place, the ground beneath her feet was almost unidentifiable save it was some form of colorless clay. A few paces away a silver rectangle jutted from the ground. An assortment of silver chains draped across the top. Raven tore her eyes from the disgusting thing. Quietly, she drew towards Beast Boy and took him into her arms. He was liable to be incredibly weak from this whole ordeal. A grim look flashed across her face, but it was not backed by any emotion.

Raven wouldn't feel. She refused to believe she was doing this. The girl laid her companion atop the silver thing and she cast a stabbing glare at the chains. She would not restrict him. Slowly pulling the small black book from her bag she allowed it to fall open. The final release was at hand, but it would require loss. Loss of love. Raven's eyes flickered with a brief moment of sorrow before her strong, apathetic shell was reconjured. She slipped the dagger from the book and her eyes wandered from the spell on the page to the alter on which Beast Boy lay.

fate has granted

twice a chance

that i could have

true meaning

and see in you

what is me

and believe for once

I can be beautiful

so help me fly

and spread my wings

wide to

the azure sky

and hold me in

the darkest night

and let me feel

your heart beat

PLEASE READ! To Clarify:

Ok, this is just a few things I think you should know so some of the odder details of this story make sense. It's a bit late to be putting this in but once you read it, I hope some of your questions will be gone. I won't be saying too much as that would be spoiling some fun twists. First off, The eye thing. Raven's physical appearance changed from violets to scarlets in my story because Trigon's control was growing and he gained partial control of Raven's physical self. That's why she was completely unaware of exactly what she'd done to Lark save she'd conjured spirits. That meant her outbursts were particularly dangerous seeing as Trigon could take control of her physical body and not just her mind in an outburst state. Raven's eyes reverted to normal in this chapter because in the realm breach she regained some of her spirit by admitting her love. She also released the Dawn Goddess's spirit as we found out in this chapter. Arella will not be staying long, but she felt the need to come back and aid her daughter in the fight to release herself of Trigon. She did so through speaking with BB.

Now, Raven's names are a little more complicated. All of this stuff about her eyes and her name and how her mother died are purely my imagination. None of it is based on the original comics. I really don't know. Either way. Raven was born under the name Capria, which is Azarian for Dove. She was betrothed to a demon for the sake of bringing peace to Azerath. It was also a good way of getting rid of Raven who was sort of an outcast ((there are hints of that in her brief encounter with Alipes who was a past love interest that turned against her)) The demon refused to marry Raven, saying she was disgusting and unworthy of such a name as Capria. He said he would accept her out of pity if they renamed her Raven, or Metrion in his dialect. It was agreed upon and a formal ceremony was performed and Raven, Capria at the time, became Metrion. In respect to her old name she was often called Capria Liy Metrion, or Dove that is Raven. When she came to earth she kept the name Raven, having convinced herself truly unworthy of being called a Dove. She refused to be referred to as Metrion, though, because it brought up some haunting memories. Yes, she did murder her husband to be.((And in the name of her love to Alipes too!))

Over time Raven thought she could just endure life as a titan on earth but then Trigon started to take control, ect. As she explained to Beast Boy and was mentioned in the very beginning of the story. After that the curse was set in place and here we are. For those of you who are freaking out because you think Beast Boy is going to die, don't give up yet ((hint, lol)) as I have a strong distaste to permanently killing off any of the original titans.

Well, there you are! I hope that helped.


Author's Note: Ok, well I'll say it again. Please don't give up on BB yet... I really haven't decided how this works out. I hope this chapter won't scare you out of reading the rest. I hope to get the next chapter up within the next two days, so keep a look out. Also, a lot of you seemed to take an intrest in the various planets. If you are interested, leave a note at the end of the review if you would like me to put up a little "traveler's guide" chapter at the end. That would tell you more about the planets, their inhabitants and their relationship to Raven as well as some of the animals that live there. Just a thought. I would appreciate it if you would drop off a review now! Thank you kindly!

Love,

Princess Starfire of Tamaran

P.S.- if you're feeling sad/frightened for BB, I offer you a consoling cookie. lol.