The Cluedoville Files Case #6: Driving Mrs. Peacock…crazy.
I arrived at the office earlier than I needed to, as usual, and began to brew up a pot of coffee. The coffee is for me, primarily, but Dick seems to like it too, so I figured, why not? (For those of you who aren't detectives and haven't figured it out already, I'm Miss Josephine Scarlet, Dick's secretary. This case is told from my point of view.) It was a typical day in Cluedoville, North Dakota, except that Dick didn't arrive at his usual time. I decided to call his place and see what was up.
"Richard Brown, Private Investigator, how can I help you?" came a rather groggy and nasal voice.
"Dick, it's Joey. Why aren't you here?"
"Oh, I'm sorry; I think I'm coming down with something. Dr. Silver said I should stay in bed for today. Can you handle…?"
"I'm way ahead of you, Dick. Get well soon! Bye."
I never want him to know this, but I've seen the way Dick operates, and it doesn't seem all that hard to solve these cases. I was 100 certain I could handle any customers who came in today. At around 1:00 pm I got my chance to prove my smarts when my mother, Mrs. Patricia Peacock, waltzed into the office with a distraught look on her face.
"Josephine, my dear!" she squealed as she gripped me in a tight embrace. "Where's Richard? I need his services right away!"
"The Inspector is out sick today, Mom. I'm filling in for him. What's up?"
"Well, just this morning I invited all my friends over for breakfast. You've met them all, right, dear?"
I had. Her friends included but were not limited to the following: Mrs. Blanche White, Miss Rachel Peach, Colonel Michael Mustard, and Professor Peter Plum. Oh, and Rusty Naylor, the gardener.
"Anyway, we were all enjoying a nice conversation, and the subject turned to automobiles. Then Rusty suggested that he take my guests for a nice drive through the country. I thought it was a most fantastic idea. I told them they could use any of my cars, except the new PT Cruiser."
I remembered when she bought that car. I asked her if I could try it out but she wouldn't let me. Apparently she won't let anyone drive the PT Cruiser. I just had to know why.
"I only bought the car because I plan to resell it. It's more of an investment really. I don't even drive it myself."
"Well, I guess that explains a lot. Continue."
"So, Rusty took the others out to the garage, and they went ahead and made off with the PT Cruiser, after I deliberately told them not to!"
"And you wanted Dick's help in finding out whose stupid idea it was to take the car."
"No, I wanted him to find out who crashed it!"
"Wait, what?" I said much louder than I probably should have.
"I got a call from the lot of them, saying they ran into a tree and asking me to come pick them up. The audacity of those five!"
"Okay, okay, where are these guys now?"
"I left them back at my place."
We high tailed it back to Peacock estate. As my mother had told me, the usual suspects where lined up for questioning. Blanche, Rachel, Mike, Pete, and Rusty all looked nervous and guilty. I decided the best person to interrogate first would be the mastermind of this whole plot: Rusty.
"Okay, Joey, here's what I know happened," he said. "All of us went to the garage, then I told them it didn't matter which car they chose, as long as I drove. They started to protest, but I quieted the mob with 'Ah, Ah, Ah! I have the key!'
"At that point, Rachel called 'SHOTGUN!' Then Mike said 'I simply must have a seat by the window.' Pete said 'I too must have a window seat. Otherwise, I tend to get carsick.' In a whiny voice, Blanche said 'Fine, I'll sit in the middle.' I could tell she had stepped on Mike's toes as we got in.
"So we pulled out of the driveway, and Pat saw us. She screamed something at us, and Mike flicked her off. We were just out of Pat's line of sight when the car screeched to a halt. Everybody was really confused, but I soon learned what happened."
"Let me guess," I said. "The thing ran out of gas."
Rusty looked a little embarrassed. "Yeah. So, Mike and Rachel hiked almost half a mile both ways to get some gas. Then we piled into the car, and I was about to step into the driver's seat, but Rachel stepped in my way. 'Oh no, you don't! You got us into this mess, and you are not going to screw up again!'
"But right about there is were my memory gets fuzzy. I don't even remember how we crashed into that stupid tree. I'm sorry; I wish I could give you more info."
I thanked Mr. Naylor. The next person I chose to speak with was Blanche. She began to tell the whole story, but I told her, "Just start from when Rachel took the wheel, okay?"
"Okay," she said. "Well, Miss Peach gave Rusty a talking to, and then we were off. We had barely gone 7 miles when we heard a massive explosion. The Colonel hit the ground, screaming 'Incoming!' As it turns out, Rachel had rolled over a box of tacks and blew out the left front tire. It was decided that we would all go back to Pat's place as soon as we changed the tire. However, there was a disagreement as to who should drive on the way home. Let's just say nobody was sitting in the same seat as before.
"The driver made a U-turn, and we were on our way back. I remember the driver arguing with Mike as to which radio station we should listen to. Mike changed it to an Oldies station, the driver put it back, they kept going back and forth, and the next thing you know we crashed into a tree. After that, the whole thing was kind of a blur."
I had the entire story, except for who was driving. And the rest of the suspects didn't give me much info either. Pete didn't remember anything. Rachel said she sat next to Rusty, who refused to sit in the middle. And all that the Colonel remembered was that he was sitting next to a woman when the crash happed.
It was at this point that I realized I was in way over my head with this case. Dick could figure this out if he were here. I thought to myself. And then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I got the Private Eye on the horn and told him all that I had.
"Oh, come on, Joey. This case is too easy. Mike was riding shotgun, because he was messing with the radio. He was sitting next to a woman, who was also the driver. Rachel sat in the back, next to Rusty, who refused to sit in the middle. The only other female is the one who crashed your mom's car!"
This is why he gets his name on the door and I make the coffee. Mrs. White could have lost her job if my mother had pressed charges. Instead, Blanche agreed to pay for the repair work and Patricia forgave her. Oh, and don't worry about Dick, he got his deuce and his health back. It was just another average day in Cluedoville, North Dakota. Nothing unusual ever happens here.
Until next time…
