We arrived back at the hotel a little later that evening. The traffic was heavy in the late evening which made the cab ride seem to take forever. No one believed my story about Carter Verone. They thought I talked to him, but I had to keep the truth a secret to protect everyone. As soon as I got to my hotel room I climbed into bed, without even changing. I was exhausted, maybe physically, but mentally.

Tej sat down next to me on the bed, "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine, just tired," I told him annoyed; he didn't pick up on my tone and continued to question me.

"You're not going to change?"

"No, I'm too tired," I was getting really annoyed. I shut my eyes, trying to shut out the bright lamp next to my twin bed.

"I'm worried about you, you've been through so much," Maybe it was Tej tone of voice or maybe it was the alcohol, I'm not sure but whatever it was, it made me snap.

I sat up and let my feelings out. "You have no clue what I've been through Tej, being raped and abused. You think that's easy? I'm allowed to be depressed once and a while, I'm allowed to be upset." I was speaking louder than I should of and I was surprised Tej was letting me act this way. Tej was only concerned about me, but I just felt as if he didn't truly understand me.

"Than tell me, make me understand Alexia. Everybody cares about you, your brother, your sister, everybody is worried."

"Well they shouldn't be. I'll be fine."

"People who are fine aren't on drugs," I looked up at Tej to see him pull the bottle Brooke had given me out of his pocket. I didn't know what to say to him. I was ashamed he had found the drugs; all I could say was the truth.

"I was a little stressed about the things going on, the party, the fight, Mia and Brian getting married."

"That's no excuse; there must be a better reason."

"I don't have to have a reason, I mean, does Trey have a reason why he raped me? How about why he hit me?" I started to cry, everything was so over whelming. Tej grabbed me in his arms and hugged me.

"It's gonna be ok."

I looked up at Tej with tears in my eyes, "How do you know?"

"Cause I'm gonna protect you, he will never hurt you again." The way Tej looked at me I knew that believed he could keep me safe, maybe he could from Trey, but I knew he never could from Carter Verone. I did something that night that I probably shouldn't have done, I kissed him. It was the perfect kiss, a minute of so much passion. "I can't do this," Tej told me after pulling away.

"Why?" I asked confused.

"You have been through so much in the last couple of months. You're upset; I'd be taking advantage of you."

"So what you can sit here, kiss me, what was it not good enough for you?" I asked him wondering how he could do this to me. The last couple of weeks he had acted as if he truly cared, not the way all my brother's friends normally acted, it seemed like more than that. Tej went to object to my previous statement but I put my hand up to stop him, "Forget it, I'm going to sleep in Jesse's room." I grabbed my room key and cell phone; and went out of the hotel room without looking back at Tej.

I didn't want to go right to Jesse's room because I knew that he would ask a lot of questions. I knew if I walked around and Dom found out that he would have my ass. Deciding against taking a walk to clear my head, I knocked on Jesse's hotel room door. Jesse came to the door in only a pair of boxers. "Lex, what's going on?" he asked worried.

"Tej and I…." I started but was interrupted by a voice in the room.

"Are you coming back to bed?" the female voice spoke.

"Oh Jes, sorry, I didn't know, go back to whatever you were doing. We can talk in the morning." I told him slightly embarrassed I had interrupted him. "So I'm going to go." I took off walking down the hall ignoring his calls from behind me. I decide to go downstairs to the Starbucks, I would go back to Tej and my room later when I knew he was sleeping. If Jesse had a girl in his room, chanced were that the rest of the guys probably did too.

I climbed on to the elevator and took it down to the ground floor. After checking my watch I realized how late it was and was glad to see the shop was open. I ordered a coffee and sat down at one of the tables. Why is everything in my life a mess? Things seemed like they were never going to get better.

"You look lonely," a young woman stood in front of me.

"Most days of my life," I gave the girl a slight smile to let her know I wasn't being entirely serious.

"Can I sit down?" the women asked. She looked nice enough, so I nodded. "I'm Monica."

"Alexia," I told her.

We continued to talk for a while. She was really nice and seemed to truly care about things we talked about. She didn't chase away my feeling or tell me I was just a kid. Monica told me how she was in love once, but the guy ended up being in love with someone else, he was just using her to fill a void. So she went back to her ex boyfriend, a man she use to work for and they've been happy for months. I couldn't believe that she had told me all that stuff about her. She treated me like I was an adult, which was more than anyone else had ever done.

Our conversation was ended by my cell phone ringing, I realized that it was already seven in the morning and Monica and I had talked all night. I was going to be in so much trouble.