A/N: Yes. This is a fic about Riley. Because, dammit, I LIKE Riley. If you don't, DON'T READ THE DAMN STORY! There's nothing I hate more than getting reviews that say things like "I hate Riley! Why would anybody write a story about him?" If you DON'T like him, and you read the story anyway, it doesn't really speak much for your intelligence, does it?

And as you very well know, I don't own anything that isn't mine. Which, admittedly, isn't much.

Spelling may vary

Chapter 1: Leavin' on a Jet Plane

"Peanuts?" A blonde bimbo in the stewardessflight attendant- uniform stood by his seat, arm draped seductively over her drink cart. "Beverage? Or...anything else I can offer?" She winked at him, leaning in to display quite a bit more cleavage than was strictly necessary. Riley Finn, formerly of the U.S. Military, shifted in his seat. He wished she would shut up, go away and throw herself at someone else's feet. He was not in the moodMight never be in the mood again. Riley was Relationship Guy. And he went about his relationships like he went about the rest of his life... Which is to say rushing headlong into the darkness without thinking about what might be lurking to devour him.

He'd taken it uncharacteristically slow with Buffy, genuinely afraid of scaring her away... But that was when she was normal. Well, no. That was when he THOUGHT she was normal. He supposed she never had been, really. Not that he had been the poster child for the Average Joe. But none of that mattered now. When he'd needed her, she hadn't been there. So he left her for the only woman who'd ever needed him. The military.

And then he'd met Sam. No, he chided himself. Don't think about her. Don't think about... But he couldn't help but cast his mind back to the last time he'd seen her.

She stood in the doorway to the bathroom, tears streaming down her eyes, watching him pack another suitcase. That was enough to unnerve him. In all the time he'd known her, he'd never seen her cry. And to be the cause... But he had to do this.

"I'm sorry, Sam. You have to understand..." He trailed off. How could he explain it to her? He didn't understand it himself. How could he tell her that he was leaving her because the girl he'd once been so in love with, once upon a time, still might need him? It was her voice that had set him off. She'd tried to contact him... Get a message to him. But he'd been there, on the phone. And he'd realized that his life til now was a mistake. He picked up his sparse belongingsmost everything he owned actually belonged to the Governmentand walked purposefully towards the door to the apartment he and Sam shared when not on assignment.

"Agent Finn!" He turned, slowly. The title that had been til now only a joke was all business. Sam's voice was clipped, professional, and held no sign that not two minutes before, she'd been begging him not to leave. "Agent Finn, if you walk out that door, don't bother coming back." She stared at him, daring him to take another step. And he did. Because he had to.

"Sir?" Real concern touched the flight attendant's voice. "Sir, are you alright?"

Riley's had strayed to his bag. "No. No, I'm not. But then, none of us are." He grinned at her, covering the pain, the scars that ran deeper than those in his flesh. The woman paled, and nodded. "I'd better go, then. We'll be landing at LAX in a half hour." Riley didn't say anything, just turned to stare out the window again. They'd be landing in LA, and then he'd see about finding Buffy. And then, maybe he could sleep in peace.