Disclaimer: Anything you don't recognize from the show is mine… everything else… I wish!

Note: thank you so much for the comment... I hope I don't disappoint!


Everything I know Has Let Me Down

She told the motel manager that she wouldn't be renewing her room. She gathered what little she had and took the same root to Jake's house as she had the days before.

Jake answered the door with Jenny in his arms. Jillian looked at the two of them and hesitated; why, Jake wasn't sure. He moved out of the way so that she could enter.

"This is your place now, too, Jilly. You don't have to knock anymore."

She blushed, as she usually did when she did something wrong. "I didn't even think about it." She looked at Jenny and smiled big, making Jenny mimic her expression. "Hey, its sweet baby Jennifer."

Jenny was reaching out toward her, so Jake released her. Jillian put her bag down and took Jenny in her arms as she walked in.

"This must be really weird for you, Jake. I wish I could do something to make this less awkward."

"This is the best thing for all of us. We'll just have to get used to it is all." He wasn't sure what else he was supposed to say to her. "My mom put new sheets on the bed and everything. She left some clothes for you, too. When you said you didn't have a lot of clothes, you really meant it."

"Yeah, and they're starting to smell almost as bad as they look." He picked up a shirt that was sticking out of the top of her bag.

"You're not much of a seamstress." She playfully punched him as she stood from the couch.

"I got better the longer I was there. The others were asking me to make their clothes after awhile."

He looked perplexed. "There were more there..."

"Like me? A few girls had the same 'problem'" she motioned the quotes with her hands. "But we weren't allowed to talk to each other."

He never really thought about the loneliness that Jillian must have felt, how alone it must have felt to be without Jenny. He never thought that there be more girls like her either, and now, more than ever, he felt less sorry for himself, and more sympathetic toward her.

With very little to put away, Jillian mostly spent the day reading 1984 and playing with Jenny. Jake had a paper to write, so she mostly left him alone to his studies. Well into the afternoon, Alice came home early from work, in the same condition of disarray and paperwork as the day before. She smiled warmly as she came in and saw Jillian, in one of her old outfits, playing with Jenny on the living room floor.

"How come that looks better on you than it ever did me?" Jillian turned quickly at the sound of her voice.

"You scared me, Mom. Aren't you home a little early?" Jillian didn't even notice that she called her mom until it was already out of her mouth, nor did Alice notice.

"Everything that I had left to do, I can do here at home, and with less distraction." She sat down, obviously with something to say to Jillian. Seeing the concern in her eyes, Jillian turned to face her, but kept a hand on her daughter.

"Is everything okay?" She was almost feeling fear, and decided to pull Jenny closer to her, somewhat of an attempt to ease her fear.

"I talked to a few people at work today about this situation we are in." She put down all the stuff in her hands to be able to concentrate on Jillian. "They are lawyers that work with our practice. You don't have to worry, dear, I was talking off the record, so to speak."

Jillian was still tensing, but willing to listen. Jenny took Jillian's index finger into hand and chuckled. Jillian couldn't help but smile at her and hold her tight.

"They said there is no easy way to fix this situation. What we need to do is get your mother to sign over guardianship to me. But you know, Jilly, that she will never-"

"She would sign over if she had no choice." Alice looked at her, unsure of what she was saying. "If I threaten to go to the police or take her to court on criminal charges, she will sign on any dotted line."

"That is not the solution, sweetie. Threatening her will only make things worse."

"She has given me many reasons to be afraid. All through my life, I've had to live in fear, because I never knew what she was going to do to me next." She rocked Jenny for a minute. "I want her to be a little scared for a change."

Alice started to speak but couldn't find any words, couldn't find an argument to what Jillian was saying.

"I already made up my mind. I'm going to give her a call. I'm going to lay out my cards and let her chose what she wants to do. My dad will go along with whatever she does. I can't live like I did. I refuse to leave Jenny ever again." She paused. "I refuse to leave him again."

Alice knew who she meant and nodded in understanding. She took a deep breath in and looked hard at Jillian.

"Let's make that call then."


An hour later, Jillian, Jake and Alice with Jenny in hand were sitting around the kitchen table, staring at the phone sitting in the middle.

"Do you know the number to your house?" Jake continued to stare at the phone as he asked. Jillian nodded, indicating a no.

"I was never allowed to call." She picked up the phone and dialed information. "Its now or never." She paused and took a deep breath, waiting for the operator. "Patricia Summers. Asheville, North Carolina. Thanks."

Sitting at the table was not helping her nerves, so she stood and paced, waiting for the phone to pick up. And finally, someone answered.

"Hello? Who is this?"

"Hey, mother." There was a long pause. Jillian could almost swear that she heard her mother laughing in the background.

"I knew you would have to call eventually. What kind of problem did you get yourself into? You should hope I will help you get out of whatever mess you've gotten yourself into."

"Well, normally you would help me just because you want to be able to hurt me yourself, but that's not why I'm calling." She looked over at Jenny. "I called because I'm fine and I want you to leave me alone."

Now, she could hear her mother laughing loud and clear.

"What, did you find yourself a little life to return to? You know that I can come and take you away just like I did before. Nothing is going to stop me." She laughed again for effect. "If you come back willingly, I'm sure that we can figure out an arrangement so that your punishment is not too severe."

"Too severe? You don't know how to go easy on punishment, mother. You only know severe. I'm never coming back. I never am going to go through that hell again."

"You need to be there, Jillian. You think that you, with your morals, will ever become anything? Do you think that God will save you a place in Heaven? You and your sinning ways; running away, disobeying me and your father, getting pregnant at fifteen."

"Yeah, and I'm sure God loves parents who beat their children."

"I only did what God told me to do, to help you see-"

"No, you beat me because it made you feel good." She was starting to cry. "I never want to see you again, and there is no way I'm going to go back there. I'd rather die."

"Then hang a rope sweetheart, because you have no choice."

"No, I have lots of choices; you are the one that has no options." All her mother could do was laugh while waiting for the rest of Jillian's threat. "I want to stay here with Jenny, all two hundred miles away from you. You are going to sign over guardianship to Alice and George and leave me the hell alone for the rest of my life."

"Why would I ever agree to that? You are my daughter, not theirs."

She was choking on her tears, but she knew she needed to sound strong. She couldn't handle the pressure of having to stand up to her mother ever before. This conversation was the determinant of whether she would be whisked away again.

"I will tell anyone willing to listen to me that you are unable to care for me. And hopefully I could get you some jail time, too." She looked over to Jake; he could see all the pain in her eyes. "If you don't think I can do it, I have witnesses that will say what they saw. One way or another, I'm not going back."

"You would never be able to do it."

"No you have that wrong. I can and will. Alice has already contacted a few lawyers. I want to get my life back together to take care of my daughter."

She had so much anger inside her that had been repressed, but all she could do was cry. Her mother was silent and that scared her. She was breathing hard, holding her hand over the receiver so Patricia wouldn't be able to hear. Out of nowhere, Jake was standing beside her, his hand holding her free hand, and Alice rubbing her shoulders. She could feel the strength she had inside her, waiting to be released. She removed her had from the receiver.

"I think there's a cell block with you're name on it, mother, but you can prevent the humiliation of it all. Just give me my life back."

"You ungrateful whore." Jillian smiled. She knew that she had won.

"I'll take that as a sign that you will sign the papers. I'll have them faxed over right now." She took a breath. "I guess we won't be talking anymore after this. Have a nice life in Hell. Oh, God be with you, Patricia."

She ended the conversation on her line and rushed into the arms of the three people behind her who were cheering.