Ok… time to thank the reviewers:
WickedWitch9: Thanks… it's amazing how small things help people.
Chica De Los Ojos Café: Yeah… the last chapter was depressing because I was depressed. I guess I still am, but not as much… I hope this one isn't so depressing. But no guarantees. I don't know because I write the 'authors notes' before I write the chapter, and I don't plan things out so… I'll be just as shocked as you when I read it. After it's posted of course.
Titanfan: I'm writin' I'm writin'!
Sorry if I'm forgetting anyone but… you're awesome for reviewing!
Oh, before I forget: I'm sorry if it seemed like I stopped my other story, I didn't.
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Teen Titans OR any AFI song that I use in this! So nobody sue! Especially not anyone in AFI… unless I could meet you… then um… JUST KIDDING! So nobody is mad: I'M NOT DOING THIS FOR MONEY! I just REALLY like AFI. GOT IT? Good.
4…
"Morning." Robin said to me. I groaned and opened my eyes. "Tired?" He asked.
"Yes. How do you manage to get in my bed?"
He smiled smugly. "You were asleep so I just crawled in last night."
Now I remembered. I had been looking around at me team members rooms. I sighed. "Fine."
"So I win?"
"Yes."
A smile played across his face, he was leaning forward when Cyborg knocked on the door. "We slept late yesterday, we need to get up now! It's 8:00! They could be here soon!" Cyborg shouted. I was just about to open my mouth when Robin kissed me.
"Time to get up." He said, pulling away. I nodded.
"I'm going to shower." I grabbed some clothes and walked into my bathroom. I glared at the mirror. My reflection glared back at me. I turned the water on and stepped in, the icy water slapping my back. "Why?" I whispered to no one. "Why does it have to be this way? Why couldn't we have been strong? We were the Titans." Were. The word echoed as I turned off the water. Were. We were the Titans. We aren't now… we are just rebels. We are against Slade, we are losing against Slade! How did we let this happen? "This is getting all to repetitive." I said as I stepped into my room. Robin was nowhere in sight. I sighed and walked to the kitchen. Starfire was standing over the stove making eggs. She had given up her puddings years ago, mustard was a rare treat for her.
"Morning Star." I said.
"Hello Raven."
I wanted to hug her, I didn't want to hear the depression in her voice.
"I just got a report, they aren't coming until sunset. Man, what is it with people and sunset? They say they may be late, so we have all day. Nothing is planned for today either… I guess we can train and research."
"Fine." I said. Robin stepped into the room. Cyborg started to tell him the plan, then they started to talk about training. No one heard me leave muttering "I'm going on patrol." It was my best excuse for getting out of there.
I soared over Jump city, looking down at the people I calmed. Oddly enough, it worked better than meditating. I watched the rooftops flow by under me. As I got closer to the middle of the city things began to get dirtier, more buildings were abandoned and homeless roamed the streets. I frowned, this wasn't right. What happened to the prosperous Jump City that had welcomed everyone into an expensive downtown? I didn't need to see any more of the city than what I had. I flew back to the roof and landed gracefully on both feet. I sunk down to the floor and sat Indian-style. "Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos…" I began to meditate.
"Raven." Someone laid a hand on my shoulder. I turned around to face Robin. "Do you want some lunch? We ordered pizza."
My stomach growled before I could say no. "Fine." I said.
"Where have you been all morning?" We walked down the stairs and into the elevator.
"Watching." I replied.
"Watching what?"
"Jump city, have you noticed what happened downtown?"
Robin looked concerned now. "What?"
"How abandoned everything is, things have changed so much."
"Oh, yeah… that's Slade's territory. That's why it's so desolate."
"I figured so." We stepped into the kitchen. Starfire, Beast Boy, and Cyborg sat at the table, calmly eating pizza. This used to be such a treat… so much fun for us. What happened? I shook my head and grabbed a plate.
The afternoon proved itself uneventful, I had meditated and trained. Now all we had to do was wait for Batman and the others to show up. Justice League… this would be interesting. I wondered what Robin would do when he saw Batman. We sat on the couch waiting for them to come…
"Now we have to discuss tactics." There was no hello from Batman, he came in and sat down in a chair. "Only Superman, Catwoman, Wonder Woman, and I are here. The rest stayed at camp. Now… about Robin, we need to get him, he is a strong leader, an amazing boy… I suppose he is no longer a boy anymore and wouldn't want to be called one."
"I'm here." Robin said.
"You seem to be ahead of me. How did this happen? I was supposed to be told if anything came up! There are NO surprises for us, not in cases like this! Who got him to join us?"
"I did." I said.
"How did you do it Raven?" Superman asked.
"I don't need to go into detail."
"Yes, you do." Wonder Woman said.
"Fine, I kissed him. Everyone happy?"
"I had no idea you and Robin…" Wonder Woman said.
"Well we do." Robin said.
"Congratulations." Catwoman said coolly.
"Yes. It's. Great." I hissed.
"Now that Robin is over, you will help us lead troops when needed, for now you will stay with Raven, I think it's better you two stay together anyways. You seem to work well in battle together." Batman said.
"Fine." Robin and I said together. Our personal lives didn't need to be shared with them.
Robin sighed. We were sitting on the roof staring at the lake.
"What's wrong?" I asked him.
"I didn't think it would be so… awkward with Batman."
"Yeah… I didn't think they would ask about… that."
"What? This?" He pulled me towards him.
"This is becoming a ritual."
"I like it." He kissed me, I gave in, Cyborg wasn't breathing down our necks this time…
"Robin… What are we going to do?" I turned to glare at the lake.
"I don't know." He glanced nervously at the scars on his arm. "We can't let that happen to us again." He said quietly.
It won't.
Why are you doing this again?
Because when I have someone in my mind I'm never tempted to do anything that may… rid me of my emotions, if you recall.
Oh…
And you are much better than anyone else. Besides 'it will be better in battle.'
Battle isn't everything.
It seems to be now.
Yes… But it won't be, not forever.
Not forever, so there must be hope…
"Come on… let's go back in, they'll be curious about 'what we're doing.'"
We walked back downstairs, stopping before entering the living room after hearing our names.
"… Seem to kiss a lot." Starfire said.
"Yeah, they don't really do it right. I had to coach Robin the other night, it was pretty funny."
Do you mind if we 'give them a show?'
Not at all Robin.
He swung his arms around me and we walsed into the living room making out, Robin stopping briefly enough just to say, "Like this Cyborg?"
"Uhh…. Yeah!" Came Cyborg's surprised remark.
Five minutes later…
"OK, you can stop now." Beast Boy said.
Twenty minutes later.
"OK DON'T MAKE US GET BATMAN!"
We pulled apart.
"Come on, let's go somewhere we they won't call Batman on us." I said. We marched off to my room, hearing their voices following me.
"To think Star, you would be there if you hadn't given up Robin."
"I DIDN'T GIVE HIM UP!"
"Yeah, sure… Why don't you have a boyfriend?" Beast Boy asked.
"I can get one!" Starfire was aggrivated, Robin and I decided to go back in, making out, of course.
"Ok dudes, it's not funny."
"Who says we're doing this for humor?"
I grabbed Robin's face and turned it back to me.
"OK…. I'm scared!"
"I CAN TOO!" Starfire yelled, so much for being calm. "JUST WATCH ME! Heyyy Beast Boy…" She patted the sofa beside her. "Come sit by me."
"I'm good." Beast Boy said.
A vein throbbed in Starfire's forehead, and she started to glare at Beast Boy. I could feel them turn back to us.
"Ok… Robin definantly picked up some tips."
"What?" Robin asked, and then turned back to me.
"A. You're taking up THE WHOLE COUCH, B. Whoa dude…" Cyborg said.
"Get a room." Beast Boy muttered.
"Beast Boy!" Starfire said.
For a second, it felt like old times, except, Robin and I wouldn't be making out if it was…
One hour later.
"Ok, I definantly think that's enough for 'em." I said.
"Fine…" Robin said.
I sighed and rolled my eyes. "I'm going to bed."
"Allright." The others shrugged.
I sealed my mind from Robin, I wasn't in the mood to have someone hear my every thought. It had become easier to break our connection, or maybe I was just stronger. Nothing can be this perfect for long. I could sense it, something was about to happen. I just wanted to know what. I was standing on the roof instead of in my room. I glared down at the lake, part of me blaming it for doing this to us. I calmed myself, I couldn't blame anyone. I looked down at the rocks, they looked inviting to me… No. I shook my head. I wasn't going the easy way out, if I was going to die, it would be fighting Slade.
I dove, just before I hit the rocks I swung upward, and started to fly across the lake. "What is on the other side?" I flew out further, until finally I reached a dark wooded area. The darkness was inviting. It was a safe place to me, I could hide in darkness it is my ally. I glided down to a rock and sat Indian style on it, staring further out to the lake. I could faintly see the Tower glowing in the distance, if you concentraited hard enough, and knew a few things, you would know it was Superman and WonderWoman on the roof together. I turned away, instead staring at the water that lapped up onto the shore. What am I going to do, Robin and I can't spend our time like this! He has to face it isn't like old times. Am I the only one who sees this?
I glared at the water. Yes I am… No one sees how they have changed! Why? Why only me? Why can't they SEE? Calm down… Azarath, Metrion, Zinthos… I should go back. I flew upwards, taking one last glance at my spot. No one will find this, this is where I need to go.
Back in my room I calmed down. No one had seen me, they all thought I had been in my room. Robin wasn't in here yet, I didn't want to talk to him, and I didn't know why. I looked at the CD and the CD player sitting on my dresser. I picked up both, sticking 'The Art Of Drowning' by AFI into the CD player. I glanced at the clock, it was only 8:00. Why did I come back so early? There was no need to. I frowned and decided to go back.
I sat back down in my spot, on my rock, staring out at the lake again, oddly content. I pressed play on the CD player, and the intro to the album started playing. (A/N- The intro has no words, so nobody go 'what are the lyrics' not that you will, but just in case.) Suddenly yelling started, it startled me after the smooth guitar.
If you can't stand upon the water I will see you on the ocean floor.
When you blink do you only find the misery between the lines?
Then take my hand and walk with me.
Come to me, your sanctuary,
I'll gladly accept the gift that I've been granted.
If you feel fine, then give it just a little time.
I'm sure you'll contract my disease.
Look what you've done to me now,
You've made me perfect.
Look what you've done to me now.
Look what you've done Robin.
If you can't stand upon the earth then I see you on the other side.
When you blink do you only find the misery weighs down your eyes?
Then take my hand and sleep with me.
Look what you've done to me now,
You've made me perfect.
Look what you've done to me now.
Take my hand, I'll be everything to you.
Take my hand, I'll take everything from you.
I will seep under your skin.
I will.
I will hold onto your heart.
I will.
I have held on to you for so long…
Look what you've done to me now,
You've made me perfect.
Look what you've done to me now.
Look what you've done to me now,
You've made me perfect.
Look what you've done to me now.
What have you done?
What have you done?
What have you done?
What have you done?
Done
What have you done Robin? Look at me.
I jumped. Wow… I hadn't ever really listened to this, Starfire had given it to me as a Christmas present one year, I had just set it down. Now I realized why she had given it to me, or been advised to. The music suited me, it was me, I fit it. I was a part of it.
The next song started.
Swing through sadness, tears of joy.
Curse the sunlight.
Curse it for everything, it does nothing but show, darkness hides.
Arsenic for the girls and boys.
Drink the madness, smoke so coy.
Smile injection.
Serum of a will destroyed.
The seasons change without me.
I remain in shadows growing wings.
The spirit song still surrounds me, in refrain, in shadows growing wings.
Like an angel with two broken wings, reach the sky again.
Like a devil, meant for better things, I will find my place on high.
I'm right behind you. I found myself thinking to the singer, I checked the back of the record (A/N the names of the people aren't really there, but this is just better)
Davy Havok- Vocals
Jade Puget- Guitar
Hunter- Bass
Adam- Drums
I now have to worship you. I smiled at myself, it was hard not to like them. Music game me something other than Robin to hold on to.
Lie in comfort of sweet calamity with nothing left to lose.
Lie in the darkness, I'm slowly drowned to sleep
nothing left to lose.
Three tears I've saved for you.
I'd retrace the steps that lead me here but nothing lives behind me.
So I lie in this field bathed in the light that loves me,
with nothing left to lose.
Three tears I've saved for you.
Will you be my beloved?
Will you help me to get through?
Will you be my destruction?
Will you help me to be through?
Will you Robin?
Hear one thousand screams.
Hear one thousand voices.
A solitary echo.
Feel one thousand pains,
But one is receiving a bloody invitation.
Do you want to feel the warmth?
To taste the life, to taste the life
Do you want taste the life?
To taste the life, to taste the life flow?
Go, Go
Feel one thousand lost,
sinking into soft skin.
Ingest rejuvenation.
One to consume,
One to renew.
Demanded invitation.
Do you want to feel the warmth?
To taste the life, to taste the life
Do you want taste the life?
To taste the life, to taste the life flow?
I offer grace,
I offer blood.
I offer everything till my heart is crystal clear.
I offer grace,
I offer blood.
I offer everything till my heart is crystal clear.
Let me taste the life flow.
Do you want to feel the warmth?
To taste the life, to taste the life
I want to taste the life.
To taste the life, to taste the life flow.
Go, Go, Woah, Go
Life isn't everything it seems, I would hide while I could.
One more song won't hurt. Hmm… what's Morningstar like?
A slow beautiful song started up, I closed my eyes and took in the lyrics.
I saw a star beneath the stairs glowing through the melting walls.
Who will be the first to begin their fall?
Or will we become one?
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?
I saw a star beneath the stairs glowing bright before descent
and in the morning there is nothing left but what's inside of me.
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?
And I don't want to die tonight; Will you believe in me?
And I don't want to fall into the light.
Will you wish upon?
Will you walk upon me?
I don't want to die tonight.
Will you believe in me tonight.
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?
Am I the star beneath the stairs?
Am I a ghost upon the stage?
Am I your anything?
I breathed in a deep breath and smiled. I would listen to more tomorrow, but for now I needed to medidate. The music was oddly… soothing, for something so depressing and jarring. I closed my eyes and began to chant…
I AM SORRY FOR ALL OF THE LYRICS BUT I HAVE BECOME OBSSESED(ER) WITH AFI! THEY REMIND ME OF RAVEN SO MUCH! IF YOU HAVEN'T LISTEND TO THEM GO DO IT RIGHT NOW! Just go to their website: and you'll find them. I like Head Like a Hole buy you may not, the better songs are on the album, Sing The Sorrow, or The Art of Drowning. The art of drowning is the lyrics that I listed. So… um… Thanks for reading if you did.
What am I going to do for the next chapter?
I don't know… but I'm going to warn you: I'm going to cut MOST of the sap right here, and focus on some amount of plot. So… nobody go: Ohh what happened to all of the romance? It was getting so good. Guess what: I like romance too, but I like angst a lot more.
My garden is dead
The roses fallen
No one can pick them
No one can help me
No one will reach out
No one wants a dead rose
My garden is dead
I can't look at the roses
I can't look at you
I can't face me
I can't see faith
My garden is dead
I have fallen.
... Ignore that, or laugh at it. I don't care. Next chapter soon. Review please!
And I for one, hope there is some amount of something out there, for someone, because I have lost everything and don't think it's worth going on, but still they push me. Why? I don't know, if I did I would have something against them, but of course that would make my life to easy… er… especially when they have it their way. Stupid burger king. Not meaning to be funny though, or maybe I am. Maybe I just like being laughed at. No, that wouldn't be true, I don't have to lie here. OK, they aren't lies but they're so close to them I call them that. Masks, or acting as my friend calls it.
Oh, by the way, this fic was inspired by Ashes (no not an account) my friend, the sequel at least. I wish you would like it: I am sorry for the sap, but I'm clueless on what to do as a plot. I don't want to make them apprentices, I might do something really sad, something that I will hate my fic for. Heh… you'll all hate me, and then I'll make it up with a really random and funny fic, how about that? Sorry Ashes, I know you won't like that one. –Sigh- there is no pleasing everyone is there? So… I'll have to do one for Ashes to, because YOU introduced me to this sight… and I don't know where I would be without it. Well I do, bored out of my skull. And of course, hiding my writing from most human eyes. I don't have any pets so it all works out. This is a long Authors Note, does anyone read this stuff? HEHEHEHE I hope you do.
I also think I'm scared.
I think I need to let something out too:
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
WHY DID YOU ELECT HIM AMERICA? WHY WHY WHY? WHY? Sorry if anyone is a republican. BUT:
DON'T WANNA BE AN AMERICAN IDIOT, ONE NATION CONTROLLED BY THE MEDIA, AND CAN YOU HEAR THE SOUND OF HYSTERIA? IT'S GOIN' OUT TO IDIOT AMERICA!
VERY VERY VERY IMPORTANT: Here is a vote: Should I keep the annoying and pathetic 'fluff' (if you can call it that) between Raven and Robin while find SOME way to match it with whatever plot I come up with? OR, should I do away with it, and have an awesome plot? BUWAHAHAHAHA YOU DECIDE!
This is a very long AN… Hmmm… Well, I'll put anyone who reads this out of their misery and just tell them to REVIEW.
