Disclaimer: I don't own anything here, just an idea, but trust me you can't get anything from that! Leave me to live in fiction
Summary: Set after "The Berrisford Agenda". Alec said goodbye to his first love and that changed him forever. Can he open his heart to someone else? Or will it stay closed forever? What will Max think about him from now on? He is a changed man now… A/M
Thanks to:
Ro - I'm sooo glad you like my story. I'm kind of proud of it myself. :) Hope you'll like this chapter also. I wanted to add some more suspence.
m/a fan – I know Alec is sad, but I had to change his character a little, cause we all know how he changes when emotions stir up.
hphotshot5 – thanks for your review. I'm afraid, I'm not planning to bring others to the story. This is focused on Max and Alec. I will check your stories as soon as I find time. :)
Kristibella – hey, I'm glad you like it. I know I left things hanging in the air, but this chapter will make all up. Hope you like it. Let me know.
suenooneus – Well, here's more confused Alec for you. :) Why do women fall for those types? Well, I hope you will like this.
SGOU – hey, I'm glad you reviewed. I think that it was about time for Alec to become worn out by Max. So, soon…
Gauri – Great to hear from you again. I'm also busy, so I perfectly understand. I hope you will like this chapter.
Chapter 19 – Pull me back in
"Maxie… Maxie…" - The words were ringing in her ears. She was afraid to move, to speak. Alec was sitting in place as well, not moving an inch. All the noise disappeared from the room, for both of them.
"I did it…" – Max thought to herself feeling somewhat glad, but also terrified. She wasn't sure if her words had the effect she wanted. – "I told him the truth, the entire truth."
"Oh, my God, what have I done?" – the next thought hit her. – "I've just placed my heart in front of him. Why is he not saying anything? Damn it Alec, say something…please say something."
Suddenly her conscience started to play tricks on her.
"I shouldn't have said anything. I reminded him of something that doesn't exist for him. Or maybe once did, but now my actions erased those emotions. I should've stayed quiet.""
She turned around to face him, her eyes seeing a man who showed no emotions. Alec just kept staring at the basement door.
"Why couldn't she be quiet? Why did she have to remind me so vividly of what happened? Oh, who am I kidding? Like I needed a reminder. Every single detail is tattooed in my mind.
A couple of seconds went bye before she spoke again.
"I'm sorry, Alec. I was wrong. I shouldn't have said anything." – Max said simply, but there was no actual regret in her voice. She knew she wasn't truly sorry, cause she was standing behind every word.
Alec didn't move. But, he was listening to her.
"Why is she doing this? She's pulling me back in just to push me again. Am I just a game for her? Why can't I move? My legs won't move…"
He lifted his head up, forcing himself to finally look at her.
"Max, don't apologize…"- he hesitated for a second cause in front of him was the most beautiful girl he had ever seen. Not being able to restrain himself, his eyes traced her features, her hair, face. Without a word he scanned her so innocently that she felt like that, innocent. She wasn't a warrior, just an innocent girl.
His behaviour gave her some more strength.
"Alec, I'm gonna touch your hand now. " – she said surprising him and herself as well. – "I'm gonna touch it like I did that night. Just that, OK? You don't have to say anything. I know that words aren't our thing. This whole saying our emotions out load. So, I'm gonna touch you. And if you think that you can get past the hate you're feeling for me, show me. You don't have to say anything. I will know…"
She moved her hand and reached for his, which was resting on his knee. There was nothing violent in the act. She intertwined her fingers with his looking straight at his hand. She felt like she could read his movements before he actually made it. She also didn't realize that Alec had closed his eyes. Only there wasn't the light from his room. He was blinded by the girl next to him.
"She's pulling me back in…Why can't I just relinquish myself?" – the feeling he was feeling was almost paralyzing. He couldn't move his fingers. His hand just laid there with hers on top.
The amount of pain Max was feeling at that time was almost unbearable. Now, she was the one who wanted to get away. He wasn't reacting and that hurt her.
"Alec, please, a little grip, please!" – she begged inside but he didn't move.
Her head was nodding in understanding. She lost him. She lost him forever. Taking a deep breath, she wanted to pull her hand back, but Alec desperately squeezed back. Without a word he gave her the answer she wanted to hear.
His grip was strong and desperate. She was the only one who really knew him and he didn't want to let go.
A tear streamed down Max's face falling onto her lap.
"Come, on, Max, pull yourself together. He can't see you cry…" - she wiped the rest of the tear off with her other hand.
All of sudden the basement door flew open and Alec jerked his hand away from Max's.
"Here you go, man. I had a little accident down there. I was almost buried under a bunch of boxes. You wouldn't believe what a mess it is downstairs." – Sid started to laugh not noticing Max. When he finally realized that was her, he almost choked.
"Max…hey! Well, don't you look astonishing? Damn! "Man, look at her" – Sid said to Alec who was trying to regain his focus.
"Yeah…" – were Alec's only words.
"Sid…" – Max spoke not knowing exactly what to say. Then she remembered. – "Hey, did you find the key alright?"
"Yeah, thanks. So what can I get you? And Alec, here's your scotch to go." - Sid said placing two bottles on the bar.
Alec grabbed both of them and stood up not looking at Max who was astonished. She was looking straight at him, but he didn't look back.
"To go?" – she asked quietly - "You're not staying?"
"Nah, I've got to go. Sid, thanks a lot." – he forced himself to look back at Max only to see disappointment in her eyes.
"Well, if you think you have to go…then go." – Max said not backing away.
"I'm not gonna show you I'm hurting Alec. That's one thing I won't do." – she thought.
"I need to go…see ya" – Alec said quietly hesitating a bit. In one way, he wanted to hear her ask him to stay. The other part of him knew that's not Max's behaviour.
Nodding he turned around and left.
OC looked at the entire show feeling very sorry for Max. She got up from her chair and walked over.
"Hey,boo, you OK? – she asked as she sat in Alec's place.
"Sure, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" – she tried to smile only to fail miserably. – Not convincing.
"Not really, boo. So, what happened? I saw everything, but I was deprived of a soundtrack. So, tell me, did you do it?"
"Well, I thought I did. I mean, I told him he didn't have to say anything. But if he felt the same as me, then to squeeze my hand." – she smiled at the thought. – "And he did."
OC was shocked at this. She wasn't that sure that Alec would ease up.
"OK…so why are you still here?"
"What do you mean?" – Max was confused.
"Listen, boo, you told him you like him. He told you he likes you too… In a way. You can't just leave it at that. You have to bring that ball home!" – OC shouted.
"I have to bring what?" – Max asked trying to understand OC. Somehow she was getting more confused with each sentence.
"I have no idea. It's something you say. What I meant was, it's you that has to finish this tonight. Go to him."
Max's face was emotionless. She wasn't prepared to have this conversation.
"Have you lost you mind? I'm not going over there! I'm not putting my heart on the floor so he can step on it."
"It's your call. But, you already did the hard part. Now you need to hear the words." – OC said gently placing her hand on Max's hand.
"Thanks, but, I don't think so."
"As you wish." – OC gave up. – "Come on, let's go back to our seats."
Max got up just in time to hear Sid's announcement.
"Ladies and gentleman, I'm very glad to announce one of the best piano players in the country, Michael Davies!"
Max stood in place seeing this man sitting behind the piano. OC stood next to her, trying to read her face.
Michael started to play, and the lights went dim and Max continued to stay in place. The expression of discovery covered her face.
"Ahm…OC?"
OC smiled knowingly grabbing Max's hand.
"Go."
Max smiled at her friend running towards the exit. She needed to be somewhere else…
A/N - Well, did you like it? Let me know! I promise more revelations in future chapters. :)
