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Chapter 3 - Birds of a Feather
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I've seen this place before. Clay forms stand all around, in the forms of
beasts and birds and men. A bright form swims before my eyes, moves between
them, counting off names as he does in a brilliant language that speaks to my
memory. I open my mouth to speak to him –
- flying now. Moving so fast past the stars. I can't comprehend -
The impossibly large chariot, burning with intolerable heat. Suddenly I see
myself there, holding a torch to the flame. The sun. I scream, cry out to him,
but I'm just a shadow, diminished by the intense light of the sun. We fall.
The man glows brightly with the orange flame. It makes him strong, and I am
proud. As I feel myself pulled away from him, my heart burns with a love I
can't describe. I'm...
- the heavy wingbeats of a great eagle fill my senses. It is here now. It has
come for me.
Pain slow. Pain slow. Pain -
Baofu awoke with a start. He felt flush and his pillow was stained with sweat,
though all recollection of his dream had already fled from him. He sat up
slowly, his joints creaking into motion. Ah, he thought, wincing and
massaging his neck. I'm getting too old for this.
He sat on the floor for a while, scratching himself and recovering from the
ordeal of sleep. When he finally brought himself to stand, he noticed the couch
was unmade and that Ulala's boots were still lying by the door. Oh, he
thought simply, memories of last night's outing slowly trickling back to him.
Baofu found his glasses on the floor and put them on, smoothing down his hair.
He shrugged out of his shirt and tossed it into his dirty laundry box, claiming
a pack of cigarettes from the breast pocket. He shook one out and stuck it
between his lips, letting it hang there while he dug around for another shirt.
"Let me get this straight," said a voice behind him. He turned to see
Ulala standing in the doorway to the bathroom, wearing a robe and an amused
expression. "You're wearing your sunglasses, but not a shirt."
"Yeah," he said absentmindedly, bending to pick up a dark violet
shirt that he was pretty sure wasn't the one he had just taken off. "I'm
like those underwear ads." He slipped it on and started to button it up.
Ulala grinned and crossed her arms. "And the cigarette?"
"Breakfast of champions." He fished a lighter out of his pocket and
lit up, keeping his back angled towards her. She took the unspoken signal and
stepped forward to collect her clothes from the couch before returning to the
bathroom. He heard her hesitate a moment and then the door closed behind her.
He walked over to the apartment's single window and stared through a crack in
the blinds. The morning sunlight filtered in and fell on his face and hands in
long, thin lines. He exhaled very softly, tiny tendrils of smoke curling up and
around his head.
Baofu had a lot on his mind.
He crossed his arms and stroked his goatee thoughtfully, his thin shoulders
drawn and hunched forward. He'd been having nightmares lately. He never
remembered them, but he knew they were bad from the panic he felt every
morning, and the restlessness that stalked him through the day.
And though the city seemed quiet and his life had become - more or less -
normal again, he couldn't shake the feeling that something sinister still
lurked on its dark underbelly. His eyes narrowed behind his glasses as he
watched the leaves fall from a stand of elm trees outside his window. It didn't
help that he was starting to feel his age, and that his body was telling him to
slow down and settle already.
And then there was Serizawa.
"Ta-da!" she exclaimed, emerging from the bathroom. Baofu started and
ash rained from his neglected cigarette down onto his shoes. He snubbed it out
on the windowsill and turned to face her. "How do I look?" she said,
flirtatiously.
Baofu looked her over from behind his glasses. The light that poured through
the window had run across the small room and pooled at her feet. In the morning
sun her hair shone like spun gold, and a piece of it fell across her eyes when
she smiled. She regarded him that way until her gaze slipped past him to look
out the window. She looks like a star, he thought suddenly, as he
watched her eyes fill with light.
"Same as you always do," he said simply, and stooped to pick up his
keys. "I hope you're ready to do some footwork today."
She started to say something, but he was already out the door.
* * *
"You see, if you double-click on this folder here, it brings up a new
menu."
Katsuya frowned and furrowed his brow. "It's not working."
The handsome female police officer let out an exasperated sigh. "No,
you're still doing it too slow. You have to do it like I showed you. Tap-tap.
Not tap... tap."
Katsuya nodded and readied his fingers above the button. "Tap-tap,"
he said, striking quickly and forcefully. The mouse bounced and spun across the
desk, knocking into a mauve coffee mug that said 'I'm The Captain'. A tiny wave
of sugary brown liquid slopped over the side and onto a stack of
important-looking documents.
They were both silent for a moment, then the lady officer spoke. "That was
good," she said slowly. "Though I think you may have overcompensated
just a little."
His mouth moved without making any sound as he tore a handkerchief out of his
pocket to mop up the coffee spill. "I'm s-so sorry," he managed to
stutter out.
The woman started to say something, but she was interrupted by another officer
calling her name and waving a phone. "Excuse me," she said, getting
up. "I have to take this call."
Katsuya scrubbed his soaked hanky fruitlessly against the derelict mouse. He
peeled it away from the sticky mess and decided simultaneously that he would
never understand computers and that he was not having a very good day.
Some hours later, after maintenance had been called to clean up the spill, and
the tech guy had been called to bring a new mouse, and Katsuya had done much
bowing and apologizing, he found himself quite ready to go home for the day. He
made his excuses to the other officers, who graciously nodded and ushered him
out the door, along with sympathetic words and home-brewed remedies for his
'ailment'.
"Try wrapping a hot towel around your feet. It'll take the bad blood out
of your head."
"Never mind that, Echinacea tea cures everything. Make sure to drink it
lukewarm, though, and with lots of sugar."
He nodded gratefully and thanked them again before turning to disappear down
the stairs. When he stepped outside, he was delighted to discover that the weather
had taken a turn towards beautiful. He felt glad to have left a little early
that day, so that he could appreciate the late afternoon sun before it fell
below the city skyline.
Katsuya lived in a subsidized apartment within walking distance of the station.
Since he had taken in Tatsuya, he was lucky enough to be allowed that luxury.
The truth of it was that you couldn't really say that the younger Suou lived
there, as his visits were short and utilitarian and only when he was sure
Katsuya would be at work. Earlier that week, Katsuya had taken a day off just
so that he could be there when his brother came home. Around noon the key had
turned in the lock and Tatsuya had stepped in to find Katsuya standing there,
gazing at him. The expression on his face had been so dispassionate then, so
cool and unassuming, that Katsuya couldn't bring himself to say or do anything
as his younger sibling went about his business; he changed clothes, packed a
few things into his bag, and left as quietly as he had come, locking the door
behind him.
It had been hard for Katsuya at first. When this world's Tatsuya was restored
to his normal self, it was as though he had lost him all over again. He had to
remind himself constantly that their understanding of one another had been
reset. Still, in the sadness he felt there was always hope, for now he knew
that on some level it was possible for them to be close again.
It'll just take time, thought the young officer as he walked. Time
and patience. Fortunately, Katsuya had both of those in abundance.
Though thoughts of Tatsuya weighed on his mind, he couldn't help but smile at
the magic of the beautiful weather and the lingering afternoon. It was as
though the day was hesitating, and the sun was still clinging to the shining
building tops when Katsuya arrived at his home. What he found there was another
magic all its own.
Tatsuya was home.
He wasn't just home. He wasn't packing a bag of clean clothes, or taking a
hurried shower, or raiding the fridge for anything portable. He didn't jump
when Katsuya came in, nor did he turn to give him an icy look. He was just
sitting on the couch in comfortable clothes, one leg propped up on the coffee
table, watching TV with a bland expression on his face. Katsuya could have
cried, it was so deliciously normal.
"You're home early," Tatsuya said, not looking up from his show.
"We're out of milk."
What followed was a moment of calm chased by a whirlwind of activity. Katsuya
stood, stunned, for exactly three seconds before diving onto the couch to
embrace his little brother. He ruffled Tatsuya's hair, inspected his clothes,
and made little clucking noises about the state of his chewed-up nails. Tatsuya
allowed his big brother to dote on him for a few minutes before extracting
himself with an awkward laugh. Katsuya let him go reluctantly and sat back,
smiling with happy warmth.
A nervous silence fell over them, and for a while the only sound in the room
was the low drone of the television. Katsuya kept quiet, wanting Tatsuya to be
the one to speak first. Eventually, he did. "Big brother," he said.
"Hmm?"
He watched a soap commercial intensely. "I'm home."
"I noticed that."
"Don't get any ideas, though. I just really wanted to watch this cooking
show." He smirked, but it didn't hide the tiny bit of shy vulnerability
that glimmered in his eyes.
"It's okay," Katsuya said with a grin. "I won't tell Dad."
Tatsuya turned his head and looked at his brother for the first time. He
narrowed his eyes, looking for the stern glare, the disapproving expression,
the mouth curved down in perpetual distaste. He looked for the things he
expected from his brother. But he saw none of them; Katsuya looked happy and
his eyes were gentle.
"I haven't been going to school," he said warily, testing the waters.
"I know, but I trust that you'll still pass your exams."
A swing and a miss. "I haven't been eating right, either."
Katsuya chuckled. "If you want to know a secret, when I was in high school
I always ate badly. It was just easier than nagging Mom to make me
lunches."
Another miss. Tatsuya was starting to get frustrated. "I've started
smoking."
"Now you're just lying." Katsuya tilted his head. "Little
brother, did you just come here to try to upset me?"
Tatsuya blinked, taken aback by his called bluff. "Are you my real
brother?" he said in disbelief.
Katsuya smiled gently and reached over to take his brother's hand. He felt it
twitch in surprise, but it neither withdrew nor warmed to the touch. Patience,
he thought, and held it firm. "I've definitely been through a lot of...
eye-opening experiences lately," he said diplomatically. "I know I've
been hard on you in the past, but someone - something - made me realize that I
was being foolish. The most important thing to me is you, and no matter what
you do you always will be."
The younger Suou closed his eyes against a sudden torrent of painful memories. I
was never good enough, he thought. How have you changed so much? How is
it that you know exactly the words I've always wanted to hear from you?
"You've changed," he hissed through his teeth as he bit back tears.
That's the funny part, thought Katsuya as he squeezed his brother's
hand. I felt this way all along. I never needed Miss Amano or the other-side
Tatsuya to show me that. It's the one thing about me that has never changed.
"I just learned to say what I feel, little brother."
That sat that way for a long time, hand in hand.
* * *
Several hours later, the Suou brothers were still on the couch and the credits
for an evening drama show were rolling by on the television.
Katsuya sniffled and blotted his eyes with his sleeve. "They were so
young," he said.
Tatsuya eyed him from the other end of the sofa. "Are you crying like a
woman?" he asked.
"Not at all," Katsuya said defensively. "I've just got something
in my eye."
Tatsuya rolled his eyes and let his head fall lazily to the side. "Sorry
I'm so tired. I had a really bad day yesterday." He looked up at Katsuya.
"I'd rather talk about it over dinner, though," he said hopefully.
The older brother laughed and replaced his glasses. "I thought you'd never
ask."
They got up and set about making dinner for themselves. After a brief
discussion they decided on Italian, and Katsuya put on a pot of noodles while
Tatsuya chopped vegetables for the salad. It was like they were kids again, and
they chatted and joked as easily as if nothing had ever come between them.
Inside, they both silently marveled that all it took was a little bit of
understanding.
By the time they sat down to the table, any remaining awkwardness had melted
away, and Katsuya wondered if that hadn't been his brother's intention all
along. He's always acting on so many levels, he thought. He served
himself some salad and leaned forward onto his elbows.
Again, Tatsuya was the first to speak. "I guess you're wondering what
brought me back here in the first place." His eyes didn't leave his bowl
as he toyed with his salad. Katsuya waited patiently for him to continue.
"Yesterday, I encountered something very strange," he said after a
minute. "I don't know if I'm going crazy, or if..." he trailed off
and ran his hands through his hair with a little laugh. "I just couldn't
think of anywhere else to go."
Katsuya furrowed his brow and looked at his brother seriously. "What
happened, Tatsuya?"
"I met this girl... in a club. She..." he stumbled on his words.
"I can't describe her. Big brother, I think she wasn't human. I just knew,
like you know in a dream." He paused. "I ran away from her."
Katsuya nodded slowly, watching his younger brother struggle with himself.
"And that's not all," Tatsuya added, almost breathlessly. "Later
that evening I fell asleep in the park, and I dreamt that I met myself."
He lowered his voice. "But it wasn't me at all. He looked like me, but his
name was Apollo."
It was all Katsuya could do to not drop his fork. He awakened his persona.
This can't be happening. How much does he remember? His eye twitched and he
said as nonchalantly as possible, "Oh, really...?"
Tatsuya flushed and shook his head angrily. "You think I'm crazy."
"No! No," said Katsuya sharply, drawing a surprised look from his
brother. "We've been getting strange reports at the station all this week.
I believe very much that what you experienced was real." He hesitated. I
have to be so careful.
Tatsuya sighed. "I wish I could be so sure." He munched on a piece of
lettuce thoughtfully. "Maybe I was just dreaming it all."
They ate in silence for a while, and then Katsuya spoke up. "I'm glad you
came to me, little brother." He smiled, with no small effort. "We
live in strange times. Whatever happened to you, we can get to the bottom of
it. " He waited a moment before dropping the other shoe. "But I need
you to stay close to me."
Tatsuya started to object, but his brother cut him off. "I don't want to
mother you," he said earnestly. "But rather, I want your help. There
is a lot going on these days that I don't understand." And that wasn't
even a lie.
Tatsuya was silent for a long while, then looked down at his salad and skewered
a piece of bell pepper. "I think I cut these the wrong way," he said
sullenly.
Katsuya looked over at him, then picked a green ring out of his salad. "I
admit it's a bit unconventional," he said, holding it up to his eye.
"I would have cut them lengthwise, so that they..." He noticed the
sudden crestfallen look that passed over his brother's face and paused.
"You know, I never thought of cutting them this way. It's very
artistic."
Tatsuya looked up, and then a grateful smile slowly spread across his face.
"Big brother?"
"Yeah, Tatsuya?"
"I'll stay with you. We're going to be okay, right?"
Katsuya smiled. "Right."
