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Chapter 11 - Contact

Music I can wish you, merry music while you're young,
And wisdom when your hair has turned to gray.
But more I cannot wish you than to wish you find your love,
Your own true love, this day.

-Guys and Dolls, "More I Cannot Wish You"

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It wasn't fair.

The tall machine hummed as Tatsuya carefully manipulated the joystick. When he was satisfied with the position of the metal arm, he mashed the big red button on the side. The claw opened, dropped to a pile of keychains and toys, and closed on the ear of a little stuffed pig. The chain retracted, pulling the feeble claw up and off of his prize's fuzzy pink ear, and the mechanism snapped back empty-handed to its starting position. His expression fell and he turned to go back to Maya sans piggy and three dollars poorer.

"I'm less of a man," he said dejectedly, hanging his head and stuffing his hands into his pockets.

She laughed, but didn't look away from the fighting game she was playing. "Don't feel bad. Those things are rigged anyway," she said, furrowing her brow in concentration. On the screen, her avatar ducked into a low kick only to be picked up and thrown across the stage by the grotesque cyber-human that was her opponent. It strutted over and stepped on her head, flexing as the words GAME OVER flashed across the screen.

"Tch!" she said, releasing the controller. "The computer plays so cheap."

"You're pretty good though," said Tatsuya with a grin. "For a girl."

Maya stuck her tongue out at him. "If you're nice I won't tell your brother you said that," she said, stepping aside to let a group of younger kids use the machine. "Do you want me to get more tokens?"

He shook his head. "It's alright. I'm getting tired, and you've done enough for me tonight anyway."

She smiled. "It's the least I can do." They started to make their way through the crowd back out to the parking lot. "Did you have a good time?"

He shrugged and zipped up his jacket. The sliding glass doors to the arcade shicked open and closed as they passed through. "Yeah, it was fun. Thanks for taking me to the movie and everything." He gave her a slightly worried glance. "Are you sure you don't want me to pay you back for any of it? I mean, I do have money."

Maya smiled and nodded. "It's okay, really. Save your money. Besides," she hesitated. "Well, let's just say I owe Katsuya in more ways than one. He's helped me a lot in the past." She looked away. I wish I could tell you what a hero your brother was, she thought sadly. Or for that matter, what a hero you were.

Tatsuya looked over at her. She seemed to be focused straight ahead, a strong sense of purpose showing in the way she walked. She had tied her hair back in a loose knot that was held in place by a plastic clip. A piece of it came loose and flopped back in forth in the wind; it fell across her eyes, yet she hardly noticed. A nervous and strangely familiar feeling rose in his gut; he shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair. Déjà vu, he thought. Maybe I do know her from somewhere. The Zodiac maybe? "Are you okay?" he finally said, after they had gone almost two blocks in silence.

"Oh?" she looked up and then blushed. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be so quiet. I guess I'm tired too." She flashed him an apologetic smile and brushed the lock of hair back behind her ear. "Do you know what time it is?"

"It was about nine when we left the arcade."

She looked around at the darkened street. It was still early and groups of people wandered along the sidewalk, ducking in and out of shops and bars. "Well, I'll walk you home. Then my babysitting duty will be done for the night." She grinned but almost immediately regretted the joke when she saw the slightly hurt expression on Tatsuya's face.

"Not that I think you're a baby," she added hastily. "I just meant, that's how Katsuya treats -" she saw anger flare in the teenager's eyes and she slapped her forehead. Maya, just stop talking. "Er, forget I said anything."

Tatsuya said nothing, just turned to start walking again. Maya followed quietly along, careful to keep her distance and not crowd him. He's a different person, but so much is the same, she thought, trying hard to keep her eyes off of him. The way he talks and acts - it's all so comfortable, so familiar.

"I'm sorry," he said, breaking the awkward silence. He looked intensely at the ground in front of them. "I'm still pretty sensitive about my big brother. We've had a lot of trouble getting along."

Maya nodded. "I'm sorry to hear that," she said. "You're the moon and stars to Katsuya. It must be stifling sometimes."

Tatsuya looked up at her with a relieved smile. "Exactly!" He stretched his arms out and sighed. "Most people stick up for him. They won't shut up about what a great guy he is. I know that he is; I just get tired of hearing it."

They turned a corner and walked along the graffiti-painted wall of old brick building. Overhead, a row of streetlights detected their motion and clicked on, giving the sensation of a wide lighted walkway stretching out before them. Maya smiled at the sight. "I guess I knew someone like you, once. He told me that being under someone's wing means always living in their shadow." She kicked at a stray stone. "I learned that you shouldn't shelter people you love, you should... toss them in the air! And they might fall, take a few scrapes and bruises, but eventually they'll learn to fly on their own." They walked in silence for a few minutes, and then she laughed awkwardly. "Was that terribly cheesy?"

Tatsuya grinned and nodded. "It was pretty bad. But I know what you mean." He looked up at the sky. "Maybe you could teach that to my brother. I think someone like you would be good for him."

Maya nearly stumbled. The wind had died down and the air felt very still. Does he really think that Katsuya and I are dating? She shook her head, laughing nervously. "Oh, I'm not... I mean, we're not..."

He gave her a look. "You don't have to be modest," he insisted. "I don't mind."

"Oh, I'm not being modest," she said firmly. The Suou's apartment building came up on their right, and Tatsuya took out his keys to open the front door. "We're really not like that."

They stepped into the hall, a young couple brushing by them on their way out. "Well," Tatsuya said, as they got to his door, "think about it at least. He likes you a lot." She blushed and he grinned impishly. "And I think he's been lonely lately. You should see how he whimpers when he watches those evening drama shows."

Maya covered her mouth to stifle her laughter. "You're a good brother," she said with a smile. She looked him over, surprised to discover that for the first time all night she wasn't uncomfortable with doing so. Instead of guilty and lustful, she felt genuine, healthy affection growing in her heart. He's a really sweet kid, she thought. I never thought of him that way before, because he was always trying to act older. "I think you two will be alright. And as for Katsuya and I, well..." she laughed. No promises, but I'll think about it." She blinked, hardly able to believe what she'd just heard herself say. I must be off my gourd.

Tatsuya grinned. "I guess I can accept that." His keys jangled against one another as he turned to unlock the door. He pushed it open, revealing their darkened and slightly messy living room. His rumpled futon was still spread on the floor and there was a pile of automotive magazines collecting by the wall. "Wanna come in?" he asked. "If you don't mind the mess."

"Oh, I don't," she said hastily. It took her a moment to remember that this Tatsuya had no memory of her apartment, and another moment for her to be grateful for that fact. "And I would love to stay longer, but I'm worried about Ulala. I think I should call your brother, then go home and wait for her." She dug around in her jacket pocket and fished out a pen and her wallet. After extracting a business card from the latter, she turned it over in her hand and wrote her number on the back. "Here," she said, handing it to Tatsuya. "This is my mobile phone, so you can call me any time if you need me."

Tatsuya looked at the small white card, tracing the scrawled number there with his eyes. It was a kindness that he wasn't used to, and he felt surprisingly disarmed by it. She seems to trust me so much, he thought. "Thank you," he said softly.

She looked up at him and reached out to put a reassuring hand on his arm. "I know things seem rough right now." It was the beginning of a speech, one that she had practiced many times since the day he left her. She'd told it to herself at night, when she was lonely, and she promised herself that she'd tell him someday too. It seemed like today was that day. Admittedly, it was sooner than she'd expected.

"You feel lost and aimless," she continued. "You feel broken up, like part of you is missing, or maybe it was never there." Her free hand hung at her side, fingers twisting nervously in the fabric of her skirt. "But believe me when I say that you are a very unique and special person. You have so much potential. And the people that love you... they just want you to realize that potential." She smiled wryly. "You may not know it, but there are a lot of them out there. People that love you."

Tatsuya looked at her for a long time. An open, genuine, and slightly vulnerable smile spread across his face. He felt happy and safe in a way that he thought he'd lost. It doesn't make sense, but I feel like I can trust her too. He hesitated, then leaned forward and kissed her cheek awkwardly. "Thanks for keeping me company tonight," he said. "I hope your friend is okay. Take care, big sis." With that, he turned and disappeared into his apartment, leaving Maya stunned and silent in the hall.

She reached up and touched her face with the tips of her fingers. Her eyes quivered, as though she expected to cry, but no tears came. Instead, she smiled slightly, and happy warmth pricked little roses on her cheeks. "Big sis," she said under her breath. "You know, I could get used to that."

She made her way back out to the street, humming lightly as she walked.

* * *

When Maya got back to her apartment, she opened the door dramatically, half-expecting to see Ulala singing loudly with her headphones on or fruitlessly cleaning up the place. Instead, the apartment was silent and she found herself alone in a dark room for the third time that week. This is getting to be something of a trend, she thought.

She flicked on the light and threw her jacket onto a convenient pile. Sinking into a beanbag chair, she took out her phone and tried Katsuya's number again. So far there had been no answer; this time was no different. He must be out of batteries, she thought with mild frustration, and kicked her shoes off. The beanbag squeaked and groaned as she lay back, her neck cradled on the chair and her legs stretched out over the carpet. She set the phone on her stomach just in case he got it into his thick head to call her.

She fell asleep like that, and had been that way for over an hour when a loud knock came at her door. It roused her, but she had only just sat up when the door opened slowly, and someone poked their head in. She squinted and rubbed her eyes. "Hello?" she said, sleepily. "Ulala?"

Familiar red glasses and brown hair came into focus, and Katsuya looked over at her. "Ah, Miss Amano!" he said, then flushed and withdrew his head. "I'm so sorry, did I wake you?" he called through the door from the hall. "The door was open, so I thought..."

She laughed and smoothed her hair down. "No, you did me a favor. I wouldn't have wanted to spend the night on this thing anyway." She tucked her legs underneath her and stood, still a little shaky. "Come on in, I'm decent." He poked his head in again, confirmed that she was dressed, and the rest of him followed. The door closed quietly behind him.

"I-I'm sorry," he stuttered, disarmed by her rumpled appearance. His cheeks were flushed and he seemed out of breath, as though he'd been hurrying.

Maya rolled her eyes. "You've seen me in worse shape, Katsuya," she said, kicking aside a small pile of dirty underwear. "If it offends your delicate sensibilities that much, I'll go get cleaned up."

"No no," Katsuya said, shaking his head. He looked at her appreciatively, his pale eyes sharp even behind his trademark glasses. "You look great that way. I mean -" He winced. Smooth. "I mean, you always look great. N-not that that's why I'm here. Not for... you know. Oh, god. That sounds terrible, I'm sorry." He took off his glasses and cleaned them nervously with a handkerchief, averting his eyes.

She raised her eyebrows. Even Katsuya isn't normally this strung out. She walked over to him. Her hands stilled his and she looked up into his bare eyes. "Tell me what's wrong." Memory trickled back through her sleepy head and her heart skipped a beat. "Is it Ulala? Please tell me she's alright."

He nodded slowly. "It is, and she is." His hands pulled away from hers and he replaced his glasses, regaining a little bit of his usual calmness. "It seems that she did what none of us could; she figured out where Mai and Ichirou were hiding. And she went there, alone."

Maya stepped backward and raised her hand to her lips. She felt suddenly ashamed of her feeling of surprise. I didn't really think she could do it. The realization disgusted her. I didn't have faith in her, so I didn't worry about her going alone. And it got her in trouble. "What happened?" Her voice was cold and distant.

"She handled herself very well," he said softly. "You would have been proud of her."

She shook her head. "What happened?" she demanded.

Katsuya pursed his lips. "We don't know everything yet. When Baofu and I found her, she was practically unconscious. She had been stabbed in the shoulder, and we think she must have summoned her persona. The strain of that, coupled with the loss of blood..." he trailed off. Maya could only look at him.

"She's in the hospital now. She hasn't woken up yet; Baofu is with her. They say she's going to be fine. She needed stitches and some rest, so they're keeping her overnight, but she should be able to come home tomorrow afternoon." He reached out and touched Maya's shoulder gently. "I'm so sorry."

She shook her head again, tears streaming down her numb cheeks. "I can't believe this happened," she cried, overwhelmed with images of Ulala prone and bleeding on the floor, her pale face in the hospital bed, her pretty eyes full of pain and fear. "I shouldn't have let her go alone."

"Maya," Katsuya said softly. "This isn't your fault." It occurred to her dimly that he'd never called her by her first name before. Somehow, it pulled her back from her morbid imaginings; it grounded her. She looked up at him.

He stepped forward and hugged her gently. She closed her eyes and hugged him back, pressing her face against the rough fabric of his jacket. The sudden intimacy surprised both of them, but the comfort was no less welcome. A ragged sigh escaped her lips and sanity crept slowly back to her. She pulled back reluctantly and he let her go.

She dropped wearily back into her beanbag chair, sniffling and wiping her face with her hands. "God, I must look awful," she said morosely. Katsuya smiled and knelt in front of her.

"Glad to see you're feeling better," he said, cuffing her chin lightly. She laughed despite her tears and looked up at him. She noticed for the first time that he seemed incredibly worn and tired himself. This must have been hard for him too, she thought. God, I didn't even think about how he was feeling.

"Tatsuya is okay," she said helpfully. "That's one less thing you have to worry about. He's safely at home, and he has my cell phone number in case he needs anything." She smiled proudly.

Katsuya gave her a grateful smile and his body relaxed at the mention of his little brother. He sank back into a sitting position and nodded, running one hand through his hair. Maya smiled at the boyish gesture. He looked like Tatsuya just then, she thought. Or maybe it's getting to be the other way around. "What did you two do?" he asked.

"Well, he dragged me to some samurai sword fighting movie, after which I got a nice long lecture on the history of Japanese combat styles. Seems he's still quite knowledgeable about that sort of thing." She grinned. "Then we went to the arcade and played games for a while. We both got tired, so I walked him home, and the rest is history."

He looked at her evenly, his pale eyes searching her face. "And... are you okay?" he asked, slightly embarrassed.

She looked up at him and smiled warmly. "You know, I think I am." Visible relief washed over the young detective's face. With one hand she reached out and patted his knee. "Tatsuya is a wonderful kid, and he loves his older brother like nobody's business. With all that looking out for him you do, you may not notice that he does a lot for you too."

Katsuya tilted his head and gave her a quizzical look. "What did he tell you?" he asked warily, a small smile creeping across his face. "I certainly hope it was nothing embarrassing."

"Oh no," she laughed. "Nothing embarrassing at all." She leaned onto her hands and walked them forward so that she was almost nose to nose with the young detective. His eyed widened and he made a startled little noise as she turned her head to kiss him lightly on the cheek. She sat back with a little smile. "Consider that a message from him."

He stared dumbly back at her, sudden heat flushing his cheeks. "I'll have to... thank him later," he managed to squeak out. Contact, he thought. It was all he could think; the word and the idea buzzed continuously through his head as he reached up to touch his face. Is it real?

Maya grinned and leaned back in her chair, causing its foam stuffing to groan and grumble menacingly. "So," she said. "Want a drink or something?"

Katsuya stood and took off his jacket, looking around for a place to put it before just throwing it on top of hers. "Nothing would be more welcome," he said, offering his hand to help her up.

She took it.

* * *

Water, clear blue water, stretching all the way to the horizon. I watch it sparkle and move as I walk along the beach. The trees close in on me. I struggle.

"...a few days, no word yet on whether..."

Two birds fly overhead. I reach up with my arms, and they grow long, long enough to catch the birds in my hands. They beat their wings to pull me up and away, but I'm too heavy, and I fall into the sea.

"...not too late. A transfusion would..."

The water is thick and salty in my mouth. I struggle to swim, but my arms are still stretched out and limp. The pretty sea washes around me and pulls me down. I can't keep my head -

I can't keep my head -

"...come back to me..."

- treading water. Breathing, I see the stars. Look up, fall forward into them, dizzying barrel towards one bright shine.

I open my eyes.

Ulala blinked, momentarily disoriented by the dazzling white lights. Around her the walls and ceiling melted together into a glossy blank haze. Where am I? she thought dimly. Is this heaven?

Her eyes slipped down the nondescript wall to a black smudge that wavered before her vision. She heard noises, and then there was movement, two more smudges appearing beside the first. They bobbed up and down and she was dimly aware of someone touching her wrist. Something next to her whirred and the dreamy cloud she was floating on started to dissipate. She blinked as her eyes regained their focus, and her mind struggled to orient itself.

The white haze retreated to the edges of her vision, and she became aware of the bed she was in. On three sides there were translucent curtains suspended from wheeled frames. At her feet she could make out two forms in pale blue, a man and a woman that spoke in hushed tones.

"Hello?" she said tentatively, her voice squeaking through dry lips.

One of the blue forms drew close and stood beside her bed. His face was kind and soft, and she could see that he was smiling. "Hello," he said. "I see you're awake now."

Ulala looked up at him. He was very tall, and seemed to be burly in contrast to his gentle demeanor. "Yeah," she said, trying in vain to sit up. "Ow."

The blue man touched her shoulder and pushed her back to her pillow. "Just rest for now. You're at St. Jude's Hospital. My name is Dr. Grey." He took off his nametag and gave it to her.

She ran her fingers over the etched plastic, then stuck it into the breast of her gown. The doctor laughed. "Now you're Dr. Grey, it seems. Don't go mad with the power."

Ulala gave him a weak smile and looked down at her body. She seemed to be all in one piece, save for a dull aching in her shoulder and an IV that was taped to the back of her hand. Clear fluid dripped through the long, thin tube and she wondered what it could be. "What happened?" she asked.

Dr. Grey looked at a clipboard that hung around his neck. "Let's see. When you were brought in, you had a stab wound in your right shoulder, and you had suffered from a moderate amount of blood loss, as well as exhaustion." There was a soft noise as he flipped the page. "The wound was deep, but clean; we patched it right up, so it should heal without a problem. What you need most of all is rest, and the intravenous fluid will help replenish your system to recover from the blood loss."

She closed her eyes, memory of the experience flooding back to her. Katsuya and Baofu, she thought. They found me, didn't they? "How long was I asleep?" she said.

The doctor looked at his watch. "Looks like you've been unconscious for about five hours now. Lucky girl, you get to meet the night shift." He grinned. "If you're good and get lots of rest tonight, we should be able to let you go home tomorrow."

He beckoned the nurse over and introduced her as Miss Hata. "She's going to take care of you now, but I'll be back to check on you later. Remember, try to relax." He bowed and turned to exit through the curtains, throwing her a wink over his shoulder as he left.

"You can call me Yuuki," the nurse said with a smile. "Would you like to sit up for a while?"

Ulala nodded and licked her lips. "Water too," she said, suddenly aware of the dryness in her throat. The young woman left for a moment and returned with two fluffy white pillows and a pitcher of water. She helped Ulala sit up, then arranged the pillows behind her so that she could lean back comfortably. The water she left with two empty cups on the bedside table.

"You can press this button here to turn on the television," she said, indicating a remote that was built into the bedframe. "The big one there calls me, if you need anything, and this red one calls the doctor if there's an emergency." She straightened up. "Is there anything else you need right now?"

Ulala shook her head. The nurse bowed and turned to leave, but as she pushed the curtain aside, Ulala called out to her. "Wait," she said, raising her hand. "I was brought in by two men. Are they... are they still here?"

Yuuki looked over her shoulder and nodded. "Yes, there's one man here. The time for visitors is over, but he wanted to stay until you woke up." She smiled. "He's been waiting in the hall for hours. Is he family? I can send him in to sit with you if you like."

Ulala leaned back and turned her head to the side. "Yes," she said softly, closing her eyes. "I'd like that."

The curtains swished quietly as the young nurse passed through them, then they opened again a few minutes later. Ulala heard heavy footfalls followed by the sound of someone sitting down in the plastic folding chair next to her bed. "Who is it?" she said meekly, keeping her eyes closed and her head turned away.

The man cleared his throat. "It's Baofu," he said. His voice sounded dull and tired, and something else she wasn't sure she recognized.

She bit her lip. Tears burned in her eyes and she fought them back, scrunching up her shoulders. Don't cry, she told herself. You've come this far, don't cry now. "Baofu," she said, her voice wavering. "Did I win?"

"I think you did," he said. "Aside from the part where you took a knife in the back."

She forgot her insecurity for the moment and wrinkled her nose in irritation. "Yeah well, we can't all be ex-special investigators, can we?"

"It's better that way," he remarked.

"So where's Big Suou?"

He shifted. "He went home a few hours ago. They said you probably wouldn't wake up tonight."

"Oh." She fell silent, twisting the hem of the sheet in her fingers. "Why didn't you go home too?"

A pause. "I wanted to be here when you woke up."

Ulala opened her eyes and stared at the soft white expanse of her pillowcase. "Why?" she asked quietly, still turned away from him.

"Why?" He paused. "Because... this morning the sun didn't rise. I didn't get a damn thing done, I couldn't focus, I couldn't -" his voice broke. "I looked for you, and I waited for you to wake up, just so that I could feel like a person again. I wanted to see you, so that I could finally start my day." He sounded strained and frustrated, and also just a little bit lonely.

The mattress squeaked as Ulala sat up. She turned and faced him for the first time, surprised to see that he had his hair pulled back in a long ponytail and his signature sunglasses were absent. She watched with wide eyes as he stood and walked to the side of her bed. With one hand he reached out and stroked her hair, brushing it gently up and out of her face. She made a startled noise and closed her eyes, her body relaxing back against the pile of pillows.

She felt hypnotized by the slow, even rhythm of his touch. Somehow, it cooled her forehead and eased her mind. I don't know what to feel anymore, she thought, drifting in a sleepy haze.

"Baofu," she whispered, after some time had passed. "I missed you." His hand hesitated and hovered above her head. Oh no, she thought, waking up from her half-dream. I shouldn't have said that.

"Oh," he said after a moment, then resumed stroking her hair. "Well, I missed you too."

He said it like it was the easiest thing he ever had to say. Ulala blinked, then with a quick movement reached up and snatched his wrist roughly. She tugged on it, hard, disrupting his balance so that he fell heavily onto the bed. Startled, he scrambled into a sitting position.

"What's wrong with you, wom-" he started to say, but she jabbed her finger into his chest and silenced him.

"You always do that!" she said, her nose wrinkled in annoyance. "You blithely throw out these little lines that shock the hell out of everyone, and act all easygoing about it like you're the only person who's not surprised." She crossed her arms over her chest and her face settled into an angry pout. "You always have to come off sounding like the smart one, and I really hate it."

Baofu stared back at her. His mouth opened and closed once, then twice, and then he started to laugh, his shoulders shaking as he bent forward to clutch his stomach. After almost two minutes of this, he gasped for air, wiping tears away from his eyes. Ulala just glared at him. "I'm glad you think it's so funny," she said coldly.

He took a deep breath and let it out slowly, little laughs still hiccupping in his chest. When he was certain that it had passed, he looked up at her with a curious smile. "Did it really surprise you that much?"

Her hands dropped to her sides and she nodded. "Oh," he said thoughtfully. His dark eyes looked to the side, then back to her face. "It didn't surprise me."

She sniffed. "Does anything?"

"Sometimes," he said, and picked up one of her hands in his own. He looked at it carefully, tracing the lines of her palm with his thumb, and gently touching the tips of his fingers to hers. She held her breath, acutely aware of every sensation in her hand; it felt so much smaller and more fragile than his. After a long moment of this, their hands finally clasped firmly together. She sighed, partly in relief, partly in exhilaration, and Baofu took advantage of this wonderful opportunity to lean forward and give her lips something better to do.

They kissed for a long time, but it was different from their first encounter. It was softer, less frantic, as though neither of them was in any particular rush to get anywhere. For a while, at least, their minds slowed and came to a halt while they gave themselves up to each other. At some point Nurse Yuuki came by to check on Ulala, but when she stuck her head in and saw the two of them entwined on the bed, she simply blushed and smiled, and left without a word.

When they finally broke apart, Baofu pulled back and looked into her eyes. "Did that surprise you?" he asked softly.

"No," she lied.

He smiled and leaned his forehead against hers. "Me neither." His fingers toyed with her hair as they sat in mutual silence, just breathing - in, and out, together. "Ulala," he finally said, drowsily.

"Mmmm?"

He touched a finger to the nametag pinned on her gown. "Who's Dr. Grey?"