A/N: I just want to thank all of you that have reviewed me. I know who you are and I really appreciate you guys. I can see whose favorites list I'm on and who has me on Author's Alert and it warms my heart to know that you guys like this so much.

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Chapter Fourteen

Donna had to admit with a contented sigh that Sundays were the best day of the week. Saturday could always carry over the workload easier than the rest of the weekend, though any day had the potential of drawing her to the nation's most prestigious home. But in her mind it seemed that Sundays held a sense of calmness and laziness that no other day possessed.

Saturday had a weakness. Saturday seemed the day for errand running. Shopping or laundry or going to the office to organize the files that were disheveled all the week before.

But Sunday was the day the Lord rested and Donna planned to follow suit. She lay in bed clutching the stereo remote. She planned to simply listen to anything she wanted as she pondered how time had gone by so quickly.

She was ten weeks pregnant.

A month had passed since the night they had won the House vote. During the time, she and Josh had seemed to return to their old selves and had spent many an hour bantering and quipping back and forth. Donna still had to grin about a couple good ones she got in when they were discussing the American Dairy Product Association. Yes, names of cheese could make punning all the more interesting.

A smile spread across her face as she remembered that she was all alone. Sam had flown to town yesterday afternoon from a weeklong stay in his district. Dawn and Sam had decided to catch a late movie and she was sure that they were having fun at their first all-nighter since their official start.

Donna turned the stereo to a random radio station. She was able to catch the last few seconds of Mony Mony, but was disappointed to hear that she tuned in at the end of Billy Idol. Though saddened, she was determined to hear a good song before the next dial change. And as Michelle Branch came over the speakers, she felt that her wish had been granted. "Of all the things I've believed in, I just want to get it over with."

"God, such a good song," Donna muttered to herself as she let the notes wash over her.

"Tears form behind my eyes, but I do not cry. Counting the days that pass me by."

She was pretty sure that it was a combination of her prenatal hormones and the fact that Josh and the baby were always on her mind, but she found herself drawing parallels as the lyrics continued.

"I've been searching deep down in my soul. Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old."

"Amen." She had been asking herself lately if she was doing the right thing by Josh, the baby and herself. Listening to Sam and Dawn reassure her that they would support her no matter what she chose was getting a bit annoying. That and the lack of answers that she could find within her own heart.

"It feels like I'm starting all over again. The last three years were just pretend."

"Try six, but I get the sentiment." .

"And I said, goodbye to you. Goodbye to everything I knew. You were the one I loved; the one thing that I tried to hold on to."

She tried to will herself not to cry. "It's a stupid song." But that didn't keep the tear from sliding down her temple.

"I still get lost in your eyes, and it seems that I can't live a day without you."

All that brought to mind was Josh. She did get lost in his eyes. Sometimes they could have a whole conversation without opening their mouths, though talking was always more witty. And she didn't know how she would get by without him now. She was starting to hate this song.

"Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away to a place where I am blinded by the light. But it's not right."

"I hate this song," she sobbed.

"Goodbye to you. Goodbye to everything I knew. You were the one I loved; the one thing that I tried to hold on to."

"And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time. I want what's yours and I want what's mine. I want you, but I'm not giving in this soon."

As the final rendition of the chorus played, Donna decided that she couldn't take any more and switched the dial off. She was still crying as she made her way to the kitchen and poured herself a glass of water. She had already decided that tomorrow was when she would finally brave Josh and still was battling over how much to tell.

Late Friday, Dr. Young had called her apartment and left a message stating that her Monday appointment had to be rescheduled from 12:30 to 2:45. That meant that Donna couldn't slip over there during lunch, but she would have to clear it with her boss. And she knew that she had to tell Josh the truth for two reasons: he would think she was dying and a pregnancy is a bit hard to hide as the months go on.

Wiping her eyes, she leaned against the countertop and tried her bet to steady her breath and her emotions. She decided that she would tell him that she was pregnant. She also decided that she would not tell him who the father was, though many years of self-loathing would more than likely be followed by her child, not to mention its father despising her. Donna wouldn't lie to him and say that another man had gave her this child, but she knew that Josh was going to be bitter when she would not confide in him.

She had a feeling in the pit of her stomach that she was doing the wrong thing. But when she thought of the alternative of telling Josh, she considered that wrong as well. In that instant he would sacrifice his professional activity and the Democratic Party as well as the White House would want his head and his job. Republicans would love to make a scandal out of it, and Josh would let them out of obligation to the child.

They had silently decided long ago that a romantic relationship was out of the question, so this was anything but acceptable. She would take the burden for him and deal with it.

But Donna also understood that Josh would not understand her reasoning-whether or not he ever found out the whole truth. He would firstly resent her for not telling her who the father is, then if the time ever came that he found out that he was the father, he would resent Donna for keeping that knowledge from him.

And she understood that. She knew that it probably wasn't the best plan. But in her mind, it seemed better than the alternative of watching the man she loved throw away his life and career, which he loved dearly. It may be wrong, but it was the decision she had reached.

This wasn't to say that she didn't have reservations. The fact of what she was doing was only the beginning, along with simply finding a feasible way to confront Josh in the morning. She had no earthly idea about how to broach the subject. "So, Josh. Do you know where babies come from?" She was trying to find a good icebreaker to test the water.

"I think I might be needing a little vacation time. Why, you ask? Well, they have made a lot of advances in technology, but they still won't let you have outpatient deliveries."

As she sat down at the kitchen table, she made up her mind again. Her life just sucked.


Monday morning seemed to be a relatively slow news day. There was little coming off the Hill after the latest vote and there were no international or national crises to focus on early in the day. Everyone was going about their usual routines while keeping themselves prepared for anything. Donna was relatively confident that Josh wouldn't be ready for this, though.

"Morning," the man in question stated as he made his way to his office. Donna decided to get it over with and followed him in. "What's on the agenda today?" he asked as he tossed his backpack on the floor.

"Well…" she shut the door gently behind her. "You have staff in twenty then a meeting with the leadership on the next education bill, but I have something that I need to talk to you about."

He panicked as he looked up to see her face. She was serious. Too serious. "Kay."

Donna made her way to the chair in front of his desk. As she sat herself down, she tried to find the remains of her confidence and destroy the little remaining pieces of her pride. "I need to have a late lunch today."

Josh nodded, but didn't get how this was that big of a deal. He would try and make her feel guilty for leaving him unattended, but it wouldn't be the end of the national government. "Why?"

"I have a doctor's appointment."

The potential reasons going through his mind as to why she would need a doctor were too numerous to count. And in the brief moments that he allowed his mind to drift, he noted that all were bad.

"I need you to know that Dr. Young is an obstetrician."

Josh was glad that she didn't say oncologist. Then he was pleased that she didn't say man. But then it hit him right in the gut. Obstetrician. "That's not the skin doctor."

"That's a dermatologist."

"I'm going to be that dense…you're what?"

Donna shuffled her feet across the floor and concentrated heavily on how her shoes were complimenting her skirt. "I'm pregnant, Josh." All she wanted to do was run away and cry.

"How far along?" This was asked out of care and concern. "And is everything okay?"

Donna met his eyes again as she sensed that he was taking it well. "Everything's fine and I'm about two and a half months."

"So…this is why you've been acting a little weird lately."

"Yeah. I know I should have told you sooner, but I was a little worried about your reaction."

Josh nodded. She saw the soft look in his eyes darken just a bit. "Who's the father?"

A sigh course through her entire body. "This is where things get complicated, Josh."

His eyes grew wide. "You don't know?"

"I do."

He paused. "Well, who?"

"I-I'm not going to tell you." It sounded like such a weak statement to her own ears.

"Why?"

Yeah, he wasn't taking this well anymore. She had a distinct feeling that 'because I said so' would bode well. "I know that as my friend you have a right to know, but I really just don't want to discuss it."

"Does the father know?" He was trying to find a reason why she wouldn't tell him.

Her eyes went to the ground. "He knows I'm pregnant."

"Then tell me!" He was out of his seat.

"Joshua." Her tone and countenance were no longer meek. "I have thought long and hard and I'm not going to tell you. I understand that you're probably angry."

"Well that's a relief," he snapped. "Glad you get that this might bother me."

"And if you plan on firing me then I accept it. If you plan on hating me then go ahead."

"Are you two getting together?"

"No," she stated in defiance. "It's in his best interest not to make his identity known, so I'm going to raise it on my own."

That's when it hit him. That's why she wouldn't tell him. She knew him too well and she knew that he would leave his office that very second and kick the guy's ass. Josh nodded solemnly. "Okay. What time's that doctor's appointment?"

"Two-thirty." Tears welled in her eyes as she noticed how his eyes trailed toward her abdomen. "Thank you, Josh," she whispered once she thought that she could safely speak.

"It'll be okay," he reassured as he came forward to give her a gentle hug. The contact was brief, but both were burned by the touch. He made quick work of the gesture and then turned to head to his desk.

"Staff is in five," Donna said looking at her watch. She then tried to hurriedly fix her composure and appearance.

Josh knew that he should be silent. There was nothing more to say or do. But as he saw her dabbing her eyes with the sleeve of her blouse, he couldn't resist. "You look fine, Donna." He prayed to God that she didn't see the emotion in his own gaze as she caught his stare once more.


Josh was astounded that he had handled it so well and he was certain that Donna was of the similar opinion. He had to admit that a majority of that was probably still the shock of it all.

Donna was pregnant.

Of course he knew that Donna wasn't a virgin. In fact he knew a few of the gomers that she had had a night or two with. Bile rose to his throat as he remembered a few of the choice ones. But Donna quickly recognized that he would not listen to the tales of her men.

But now he knew that there was one out there that had not only slept with his Donna, but had knocked her up, too. And this son of a bitch was putting his career before her and the baby. Yeah. It was good he didn't know.

But that didn't stop the jealousy. He didn't know if anything ever would.