A/N: A big huge thanks to everyone for reading this and being patient. If anyone read the little collab Holly and I did, it mentioned that I am experiencing a little writer's block. I will admit that it is actually Chapter Twenty I am stuck on. (I have had Eighteen and Nineteen done and on reserve because I think I hit a writing drought after a flood last week.) Sorry, guys. I am trying! I know what I'm going to do, but I'm having trouble sorting through all the emotions to make it coherent on paper. I have too much Donna hormones and Josh hormones flowing through my mind.
I have to thank Holly as always. And we have to mention that our site, The Order, is almost done!! (thanks to Holly, Mandi, Katy and more Holly)
Then, I have to again thank you all for reading this and sending me emails and reviews. The fact that you all like it so much is completely mind boggling.
And though I say this every time, if you ever wanna give me some negative feedback or you see a mistake, don't hesitate to email me. I know that I'm not perfect and I miss things. I try to keep the timeline straight and the characters as true as can be, but sometimes the situations just get out of control.
And side note: I know that the Congressional Ball is normally held in December from what I gather and this is earlyish-Spring. I just needed a ball.
Chapter Eighteen
"I'm going to a ball, I'm going to a ball," Dawn said as she waltzed around the living room. Not only was her morning class canceled, but she was getting to go to a ball.
Donna smirked as she finished making herself toast. "Sounds like it."
Now Dawn was skipping. "Prince Charming asked me to the ball last night. He even said that he would give me his invitation so I can make a scrapbook."
The older woman laughed, but she remembered when she would have felt the same. It was ironic that in her dream job she would have such dream experiences, but now she was so blasé about them that it didn't matter.
"Are you going?"
"Probably not," Donna said with a shrug.
"It's going to be held at the White House."
"I know. The Congressional Ball happens every year. I just normally don't get to go. I went once when Josh and Sam got me in. It was lots of fun, but I doubt I'll get in this year."
"Why?"
"Well, normally Josh has had work to do. Breaking guys' kneecaps, that sort of thing." She shrugged. "And even if he doesn't…I doubt he'd ask me to be his guest."
"You could get your own way in."
"Maybe, but I always go through him."
"Please?"
She shook her head. A month from now she would probably begin to show. That seemed to be the luck in the Moss family. Four and a half months and she would be as big as a blimp. By the time that week thirty-four rolled around she wouldn't be able to walk.
"Well…" Dawn pouted out a lip. "That takes away a little bit of my fun, but I will survive."
"I was worried," she snickered.
The brunette headed over to the sofa. "You should get to work."
Donna groaned but followed the command and made her way to the office.
Ever since the day that Sam got giggly in his office, Josh had been more and more distant with her. Though only a week, it really did pain her. She tried to make things right, but everything had been business the past few days. She hoped that she could change it a little today.
"Hi," she chirped as she made her way inside his office.
"Hey."
Donna stopped dead in her tracks. "You didn't sleep last night."
"Huh?"
"You didn't sleep. Why didn't you sleep?"
That certainly caught him off guard. He had forgotten how attuned Donna could be to him if she tried. Apparently she was tuning in this morning. "I-I slept."
"No you didn't." She laid the papers down on his desk so she could fold her arms. "And you didn't have a lot of work, so why?"
Josh didn't want to admit that the reason was that he couldn't get his jealous mind off of her and that he was thinking about her so much that he could barely concentrate on his work. He didn't want to say that Leo had pulled him aside yesterday and asked if he needed to transfer Donna in order for him to get his Deputy back. "I always have work to do."
"Yeah, so you had no more than usual."
"I make no quips when you come in here and haven't had any sleep."
"Okay, Josh. If that is your reasoning then I will let you off the hook as soon as you tell you're going to have a baby." The words made her eyes grow wide. Then she had to bite her lip hard to keep the onslaught of tears from pouring down her cheeks. That was one of the many reasons that she lay awake most nights: because Josh was having a baby.
He noticed her reaction and took it simply for the fact that she tried her best to not talk about the baby at work. Everyone could admire how Donna held herself up with pride and never asked for special treatment for any task. With a grin he tried to lighten her pained expression. "Can you tell? I was afraid that the weight would go to my waist, but seems to have gone straight to my ass."
The flip of his hand was what caused her to chuckle. She quickly swiped a renegade tear and added with a tiny sniffle, "More along the lines of your head."
This was the closest they had been in what seemed months. All reality said that it had been only days, but it was more than either had wanted to experience. Both wanted to be close, but both had had reason for trying to distance themselves. "Well now that the first ego crack of the day has been established, we can get to work."
She gave him a skeptical look. "Okay. Why didn't you sleep? Date?"
He rolled his eyes. "No date."
"Heard Joey Lucas was back in town. No hot sex?"
"You saw her last time…she was pregnant too. And no hot sex."
With a smirk she nodded. "Mediocre sex?"
"No sex," he grumbled.
Her gaze soften. "Did you have a…"
"No." He looked down at his desk. They had long ago made understanding that he didn't like talking about the shooting or any of the effects of it. Effects that only she knew from her time taking care of him. "No," he stated again.
Now Donna went into ponder-mode. Normally this was something that Josh found adorable-or annoying depending on the hour. Today he found it poignant only for the fact that it was a state that he had been trapped in for weeks and he hoped that she suffered there. "Donna. Work."
"Yeah." But it was clear: their bodies would go to work while their minds would continue to wonder.
Sam was really beginning to worry. He had called Josh at home a few times since last Friday and now it being Thursday, he had a feeling that another weekend might go by on estranged terms with his best friend.
Donna assured that Josh simply had a lot of work to do. She mentioned that he was distant with her too and was probably still trying to grasp the pregnancy. After Sam relayed there phone conversation she pointed out that he was probably offended that he had known about the pregnancy and the father when Josh was left in the dark.
"He takes that stuff seriously, Sam. I really can't believe that you admitted that you knew the father."
"I wasn't about to lie to the man. He deserved to know that and more."
"I know," she whispered.
"Why don't you just tell him, now?"
She released a frustrated sigh. "Sam, it isn't that easy." Interpreting his silence she added, "I know it sounds that easy but it isn't. I still have all my reservation about how it would affect Josh's career and then the fact that I have to have a job to support this child. Even if Josh would care for the baby…he could lose his job and so could I. And that would leave two broke former government employees and a mouth to feed. Dawn would have to move out so it would affect her too."
"Yeah," he mumbled knowing that he was never going to win. "Is that all?"
Tears began to flow down her face as she looked into his eyes. "I'm scared," she whimpered.
"Oh, Donna." He quickly made his way across the sofa to embrace her in a hug, but she pulled away from his touch.
She needed to say it. To prove how weak and selfish she was to the world. "I'm scared. I'm scared of what he will think and what he will do. Scared about how he will feel about the baby." A small sob broke from deep inside, but she continues on. "And scared about what he will think of me."
Tears nearly filled his own eyes as he thought of the other night. He hated to see her like that. And he hated to see Josh like that. He wanted to reassure both of them that it would all be all right, but he didn't know. He didn't know.
But what he did know is that he wanted his best friend back. He wanted his drinking buddy that he could go with on a Sunday afternoon and watch a football game while eating pizza and drinking beers. A guy that he could have a debate of how best to stimulate education reform during the commercial breaks unless they saw a hot chick in a bikini in the ad.
He wanted Josh.
With a shrug of his shoulders he picked up his phone and dialed the familiar number. If he timed it right he would catch him just as he made his way back to the office from Staff. "Josh Lyman's office."
"Hey, Don."
"Hi Sam," she said warmly. "Can I help you?"
"Is he in?"
"He's making his way back from Staff as we speak."
He heard her pull the phone away and inform that Sam was on line two in his office and then something about a Lewis wanting to reschedule till after lunch. CJ's voice was also heard, but not translated.
"CJ says hey to ya, Spanky," Donna relayed. "And Josh is on his way to his office."
As soon as she put the phone down, Josh picked it up. "Hey, Spanky."
"That one isn't going away, is it?"
"I remember one time that you wanted to be called The Housekeeper. Wanna trade?"
He pondered for a second. "No."
"What can I do for you?"
He was playful, but Sam could hear that his tone was still a little on the hostile side. "I was just calling to see what was up."
"Work. The usual."
"Well, that's always good. Doing what you can handle." Sam grimaced at how lame he was sounding now.
"Sam, why are you talking all lame?"
"I really don't know," he sighed. He took a rebounding breath. "Anyways…tomorrow is movie night again and I wondered if you wanted to join this time. Dawnie's choosing and she promises that it's going to be good. She keeps on dropping me hints about needing to go buy herself some more fishnets. I have to say that I'm lost. As long as it's not Pretty Woman, I'm good to go."
Josh snickered. "Fishnets?"
"Yeah. I have to say that I didn't even know that she had old fishnets. Let alone the fact that she needed to replace them."
The Deputy Chief of Staff exhaled a breath. He would be around enough to recite the whole apartment's wardrobes. "I don't know."
"C'mon man. We can get together Friday and then talk about a game on Sunday. The Lakers are playing…Well, someone they are going to beat. It should be good."
He had to crack a grin. A good basketball game would be nice. "I don't know. I might drop by on Friday, but don't wait on me."
"Movie starts at seven."
"Kay."
As he hung up the phone, Sam was excited that the two of them could finally be bridging a gap that had been there a bit too long.
With a blink of the eye Friday night was on the horizon. Donna had been preoccupied trying to figure out what was going on with Josh and she hoped that he would come so she could pry a little more.
But as seven-ten hit the clocks, the room made the silent agreement that there would be no fourth man for the evening. "Let's get started," Dawn said getting off the couch she was sharing with her boyfriend and making her way to the VCR. "Popcorn?"
"I'll grab it," Sam offered going to the kitchen.
"I really hope you guys like it," Dawn stated loud enough for all to hear. "It's definitely a little bit on the side of unusual."
Sam came in with two giant bowls of popcorn and instinctively handed one to the pregnant girl in the chair before settling down on the sofa.
Donna didn't mind-she was in a munchy mood.
"Rocky Horror Picture Show?" Donna and Sam muttered through mouths of food as the title flashed across the screen.
"Yup," Dawn beamed. "And I know all the audience participation."
"Lord help us all."
And they settled down for an interesting evening.
About thirty minutes later, the phone rang. Donna was still reeling from going through the Time Warp. Twice. Dawn had insisted on doing it once again they all had learned all the moves. Now she was intrigued that Sam actually knew the words to Sweet Transvestite, but opted to answer the phone out of necessity. "Hello?"
"Hi."
"Hey, Josh. We kinda went on when we realized that you weren't coming."
Only to himself would he admit that he chickened out. He couldn't stand the thought of Sam and Donna together. Especially after he found out late that afternoon that the only man that had been spotted making regular trips to her apartment was a one Sam Seaborn. "Had a little bit of work that I wanted to finish up before the weekend."
"That's fine," She said casually swaying a bit to the beat. "We aren't really doing much here."
"Hit it! Hit it! I'm just a sweet transvestite. Sweet transvestite. From Transexual, Transylvania." Sam and Dawn belted at the top of their lungs.
"Yeah…" Josh had no earthly idea where to go with a crack about that one.
"Rocky Horror," Donna muttered in embarrassment.
"I see you shiver with antici…" Sam's voice could almost be heard over Tim Curry's.
"Say it, say it!" Dawn yelled. "Master."
"…pation," Curry finished.
"What the fuck is masterpation? " She bellowed so loud that Donna was sure the neighbors were about to call the cops.
"I would hope so," Josh said after waiting a moment to see if he would hear any more of the show.
"Yeah."
There was a long awkward pause. "I better go."
"Well…we might watch another movie after this one is over if we aren't too tired. You can always feel free to drop by."
"Yeah. I might."
As Donna hung up and threw a handful of popcorn at the rowdy duet. She figured that she might as well change into her pajamas and wash off her make-up because there would be no special guest tonight.
It was only midnight, but as he saw Sam's car in the lot, Josh figured that he would be able to catch the tail-end of whatever the second movie selection had been. He just hoped that it wasn't another 1970s musical.
He knew that it was a juvenile action, but he checked in the rearview mirror to make sure that he was looking alright. Not that it really mattered, but he had changed himself into a pair of nice jeans and a t-shirt. At least he thought he looked good.
There wasn't any light under the door, but he attributed that to having the lights off for the movie. As he knocked, he didn't notice that there wasn't any sound either. Besides, Sam is still here.
"Mmmm," Dawn moaned as she snuggled closer to her naked boyfriend. They were both still in post-coital bliss.
"Yes?" he said as he gazed upon her with a lazy grin.
"I wasn't talking to you," she teased.
"You 'mmmm'ed me."
" I was 'mmmm'ing myself." She snickered and moved closer. "I was quite 'mmmm' worthy."
"You were," he said dipping down to nibble her throat. "I think I might have to make you say nonexistent words all over again."
"If you insist." As they were about to begin, both heard the sound of a knock on the door. "Sam?"
"Yeah," he nodded. "I hear."
"I think Donna's asleep," she whispered.
"Probably."
She pushed him away from her with despondency. "Well, go get it."
"This is your place," he groaned in the process of retrieving his boxers.
"And I'm naked."
"So am I," he whined in a fierce whisper. But soon enough he was covered. "What if it's your family?"
"Then at least you can say that you died a happy man," she joked as she looked down his front.
"Dawnie!" With a quiet shriek he snatched his undershirt.
"It's not them. Go."
He was mumbling so incoherently that even he could not understand what he was saying as he made his way across the living room floor. A curse escaped his lips as he stepped on an overlooked piece of popcorn while nearly toppling onto the coffee table as he pulled the shirt over his head. Then with a loud sigh, he unlocked and swung open the door. "Josh."
Josh stood there in utter shock as it all washed over him. They weren't watching movies. Sam was here for the night. And Sam had been having sex.
Then another blow. "Sam?"
Neither man had to look to know who was calling. "Josh is here."
"I-I just had stopped by cause Donna said you might be watching another movie."
"I was sleepy," Donna said coming to the doorway wearing flannel bottoms and a man's white undershirt. One much like the one Sam had on currently. "Sorry."
"Yeah." His shock was plain to see. "I have to go."
"Josh?" They practically called in unison.
But he was already out of earshot.
He didn't realize that there had still been so much doubt in him beforehand about the matter. But he realized that a man that had seen it coming wouldn't cry as much as he did on the long drive to loneliness.
