Claudia sighed and turned towards the door.
"Hey babes!"
"What?" She spun around to face him.
Beetlejuice was shuffling his feet and looking at the countertop. "Since…you know…you're going downstairs and all…do you think you could let me out? Cause I don't know about you, but it's kinda tough being so small, and-…"
"Absolutely not." Claudia put her foot down on the subject.
"Why not? It's not like I'm gonna try to kill you in your sleep!" he demanded.
"No, but you can make my life a hell of a lot worse if you're ten times taller. It's amazing what trouble someone can cause when they're life-size," she explained sarcastically.
"Well then can you at least put me on the floor so I can stretch my legs?"
"Do whatever you did to get on my vanity. See you, I'm spending the day on the town."
Claudia heard no more from him the rest of the day. When she came home late that night from a hike through the woods and an entire morning of inspecting the little town below, she didn't even give Beetlejuice a second thought as she collapsed on her bed to sleep.
The next morning, Claudia descended the steps at a breakneck speed. Popping two pieces of bread in the toaster and making a mug of tea, she inspected the town paper she found on the doorstep while she waited for her food to finish cooking. Nothing interesting in the print, save for an ad for a town-wide garage sale that afternoon.
Sipping the hot liquid, she buttered the toast and settled down to finish reading a small article about how the mayor had been required to visit the state capitol on some mysterious errand. She barely noticed it when her toast moved.
Glancing down and then doing a double take, Claudia's eyes widened at the sight of Beetlejuice, picking up a butter-covered crumb and devouring it quickly.
"'Morning, Clauds! Nice breakfast you've got here. I especially love the heart attack spread on the carbohydrate slab. Not that it would do me in, cause somebody else beat them to it! Ha!"
Claudia slammed the paper down on the rough wooden table ad glared at him.
"You know, I was looking forward to a quiet Sunday morning without having to look at you. Do you know what my mother would do if "A", she saw you or "B", saw me talking to you? She'd think either I or she was nuts, and I'd put my bets on the former."
"Bets are on, babes! Look who's coming down for breakfast!"
Beetlejuice motioned towards the door, through which Mrs. Lowe was entering, clad in a tartan robe and bunny slippers.
With a sudden intake of breath, Claudia flipped her toast over onto Beetlejuice, squashing him under a flood of melted butter and a wall of crispy bread.
"Morning, honey. How did you sleep? You ran out so fast yesterday, I barely had a chance to ask you! And you got home so late!"
"Sorry, Mom…I was kinda eager to get to know the place. I slept fine…"
But Claudia's mind wasn't on how her bed suited her. She was more worried with the rustlings of her toast and the mutterings she could hear from beneath it.
"Having toast, dear? Why don't you put some butter on it?"
Claudia dropped her elbow on the piece of toast to keep it from wiggling.
"Oh, no, I'm fine, Mom. There's butter on the bottom. I just flipped it by accident."
"Well, make sure you eat a bit more. I wouldn't want you passing out. I'm going to find a church for us. Don't be surprised if I'm not home by two, by the way. I need to do some shopping."
"Alright. Enjoy yourself!" Claudia called to her mother's exiting back.
Making sure the coast was clear, she turned back to her toast. She was rather surprised when she saw Beetlejuice's face on the slab of bread, not looking too happy.
"Smooth," he commented dryly.
"What the heck?" Claudia exclaimed, alluding to his transformation into the piece of toast.
Suddenly, he appeared in his normal form, leaning against the tea mug. "I don't appreciate the whole 'butter-side-down' trick."
She shrugged. "It was the only way to hide you. Besides, it's your own fault for playing with my food."
"Touché. So what are we doing today, Clauds?"
"Well, I'm going to see about this giant yard sale in town. I need some stuff for my room."
"Lemme come along, babes! You owe me one for the toast fiasco, anyway!" he implored, going down on one knee and raising his hands in a prayer-fashion.
"What would you want with a yard sale?"
"Well, you know…" he began, standing up and putting his hands in his pockets. "I could use a few new furnishings for the closet and all, and there's always the occasional bug that crawled in and died in someone's old cigar box."
She hesitated, eyeing him suspiciously. Was he serious?
"You're actually going to live in there? Like, try making a house and all?"
He looked straight at her, shrugging his shoulders. "Well what else am I gonna do? I can't go anywhere if I'm not big."
She sighed and gave in. In an hour, they were in town. Claudia made sure he was secure inside her backpack while she biked around and began to inspect close to twenty different plots set up.
Every time she came to a stand with doll furniture, she made sure no one was looking while she brought Beetlejuice out to check to see if anything was worth buying for him.
By the end of the day, Claudia had found a great buy on a small dollhouse and Beetlejuice had furnished it with everything he'd need for a normal house, disregarding the bathroom equipment. He had begged her to buy a Barbie doll he had seen, but she put her foot down.
"I'm bankrolling this, you little pervert. You don't need a Barbie doll, 'model wife' or otherwise."
(A/N):
Maya: HA! Dryly! Get it? He's a piece of toast! Sometimes I kill myself without even realizing it!
BJ: Sometimes I wish you would kill yourself to save all those poor people from your jokes. I'm the only one allowed to be "punny" around here!
(END A/N)
