Disclaimer: The characters are the property of Dick Wolf and company. I have just borrowed them for my own, and hopefully your, amusement.
Summary/Author's Note: "Taken" had a high and unfulfilled angst quotient surrounding the death of Olivia's mother. This is my attempt at filling it. Read, enjoy, and review. Thanks!
As light began to spill in through the windows, Olivia stirred and stretched in her bed. Pulling the covers tighter around herself she let her thoughts drift back to the previous evening. She fought back the initial embarrassment of breaking down in front of, and then all over, her partner. It would be OK. She could trust Elliot not to tell anyone else the things she told him, she was more worried that he would think less of her for not being able to handle it all.
She had slept in his arms for a long time, waking in the wee hours of the morning. He too must have fallen asleep but woke as soon as he had felt her move. She remembered mumbling something about them both getting better sleep if they could stretch out. Looking back now she knew that to be a lie, she had been sleeping just fine where she was. But at the time it had seemed important. He had given her a small smile and stood, pulling her up with him. He even walked her over to the bedroom area, wished her good night, and kissed her lightly on her forehead. It was much as she would expect him doing with one of his kids as he sent them off to bed. That was the last thought was in her head as she crawled into bed and listened to Elliot settling back in on the couch. Drifting off to sleep again she couldn't remember a time she had felt so cherished.
She was trying to hold onto that feeling now as she faced the bright light of day. Taking a deep breath, she pushed back the covers and sat on the edge of the bed, for the first time she hearing the sounds of movement in the outer room. Getting up, she padded barefoot out toward the kitchen but stopped to watch the man there. Elliot faced away from her, working at something on the kitchen counter, and he obviously had been up for a while. His hair appeared damp and he was already dressed for the day in black slacks with a tan dress shirt. His sleeves were rolled up as he worked and she could see his suit jacket and tie draped over the back of one of her chairs.
"Good morning," she said quietly.
Turning around at her voice he smiled at her, "good morning, yourself. How did you sleep?"
She was relieved not to see pity in his eyes, just a friend's gentle concern. "Good, thanks. How long have you been up?"
"A while, I was trying to keep it down. I hope I didn't wake you?"
"You didn't. But what are you doing?"
"I thought it would be easier to have breakfast here before heading to the funeral home. Or we can go out if you prefer. You're calling the shots today."
No, here's good. I don't know what I have though."
"Well, I took a quick look through your fridge. And while it was noticeably lacking in most anything resembling food I was able to find a few things. It's not going to be Elliot's Egg Extravaganza as Dickie likes to call it but it's food."
"Sounds great." She knew he was trying to keep everything normal and silently thanked him for it. That thanks grew as he poured a cup of fresh coffee and put it in her outstretched hands.
"Breakfast is going to take some time so if you want to go ahead and shower?"
"Yeah, I guess I should get ready."
"Munch and Fin are going to meet us at the funeral home, right?"
"Yes. Mallory wanted us there at least an hour before we needed to be at the cemetery." She turned toward the bathroom but then turned back, there was something she needed to say.
"Elliot?"
He had moved back to the counter but looked up to meet her eyes. "Hmm?"
"About last night…I…"
"Liv, last night was just between us, OK? Everything you said stays there."
"I know that. I just wanted to say thank you."
He came to stand in front of her again. "You don't have to thank me, Olivia. I'm your partner, aren't I? That means I've got your back, both physical and emotional, just like I know you've got mine. And leaning on each other once in a while doesn't make us weak. It just makes us human."
She laid her hand on his arm, quietly saying "thank you." Then, letting her hand drop, she went into the bathroom and closed the door behind her.
The graveside service was a simple one. The group gathered was smaller than the night before but Olivia was moved again by the number of those who had come. Kathy and the kids were there as well as other friends and coworkers. And once Elliot, Munch, and Fin had solemnly performed their duties all three men had moved to flank her.
As she listened to the words being, spoken her eyes riveted to the casket, all of her senses seemed heightened somehow. She could feel the light chill in the air and was thankful she had worn her long black coat over her dress. She heard someone sniffle behind her though she couldn't tell who it was. And she could smell the fragrance of the calla lilies she held in her hands. Her mother had loved them so she and Elliot had picked up a bouquet after they left her apartment that morning.
Finally it was over, all the words had been said. She took a couple of steps forward to lay the flowers on top of the casket, briefly resting her hand flat on the lid before backing up again. She felt Elliot's hand on her shoulder and then heard the sound of bagpipes. That brought her head up, as it wasn't something she had arranged with Mr. Mallory. Looking at him though she saw only simple appreciation, the same with Kathy and Elliot. But she caught a look exchanged between Munch and Fin and knew that this was their gift to her.
The other mourners began to file past, stopping to offer a simple touch of the hand or last condolence. But eventually she was the last one there, even Elliot and the others had moved away to give her some time alone. Saying a final good-bye she turned and slowly walked to them. Munch and Fin again expressed their support but needed to immediately head back to the stationhouse. She thanked them for coming and for the music and they hurried off.
"You ready?" Elliot asked quietly. She nodded.
"What are your plans this afternoon, Olivia? I need to get the kids to school but if you wanted to get some lunch or come by the house…"
"Thanks, Kathy, but I need to go back to the funeral home to pick up some things and finalize everything. And then I need to go into work." She smiled down at Dickie as he stood beside her, he was definitely his father's son.
"Olivia, are you sure…"
She looked up when Kathy stopped talking and caught Elliot shaking his head at his wife.
"Kathy, I'll be fine. I just need to keep busy right now."
"All right. But call me if you change your mind. And you are going to come to dinner soon, I insist."
"I will. Soon."
Kathy embraced her, holding on for a moment before releasing her to turn and give Elliot a kiss. Each of the kids said their good-byes as well. Olivia hugged each of them, Kathleen for just a bit longer than the rest as she remembered the young girl's words about family. Elliot told Kathy he would call her for a ride when he was done for the day and then mother and children hurried away.
A sound behind her made Olivia turn around. She watched as workers began to lower the casket into the ground.
Elliot watched her from a few steps behind. He had hoped she would take some time off and give herself a chance to grieve and deal with her loss but he understood why she couldn't, especially after last night. Her desire to work wasn't just an avoidance ploy; it was a personal mission. It had been a motivator her entire career and it hadn't changed with her mother's death, in fact he had a feeling it was even stronger now. She wanted, no needed, to make right for others what never had been able to be righted for Serena. Or, when she couldn't make it right, at least try to make it better.
He moved up to stand with her, taking her hand in his. For a few minutes they stood there in silence, looking on as the workers finished with the machinery and picked up shovels. He felt her squeeze his hand and tightened his own grip in response.
"Liv?" Meeting her eyes he saw her reined-in grief but also her inherent strength.
"I'm OK, Elliot."
"Ready to get to work?"
She nodded in response and he released her hand.
Side by side they walked back into the fight.
