CHAPTER 10

Steve Elton, 19 year old college student , studying computer science had been arrested at a frat party for disrupting the peace. And had inadvertently I'm sure, missed his court date.

Now the thing about Steve Elton, was that he didn't look like he knew much about disturbing the peace. Didn't look much like he disturbed the water when he took a bath.

When I had read his file earlier that day there was nothing in it that would suggest "peace disturber" or " bail jumper" what I read did suggested more along the lines of "dungeons and dragons" and "internet porn".

But nothing in his file helped explain why he would be standing in the women's clothing department in Macy's.

And his file didn't mention an interest in photography.

Why was this little string bean taking my picture!

'Hey you' I yelled. I have no idea why, it just seemed appropriate.

But Steve took it to mean "take off running"

Why did they always run?

And we were off. Steve arms and legs flailing, me in the sexiest dress imaginable and shoes definitely not designed to run in; and bringing up the rear was Lula in her orange spandex number that road higher and higher up her thigh with each step.

Oh boy!

We ran through women's wear, sporting goods back through shoes. And by this time we had picked up a few security guards. I nearly had him in the makeup department, but the little weasel bolted for the exit.

The security guards didn't sound to happy about us taking Macy's goods out of the store without paying for them, but I blocked them out and concentrated on running in heels.

It happened in the food court. It always happens in the food court. Steve turned back to take a few candid snap shots, thought full of him really, god only knows that I don't have nearly enough pictures of my bounty hunting exploits (yeah right! Grandma keeps a scrap book of) I didn't have any of my apprehension paraphernalia with me, my handbag was still up in the Macy's change room. So I used the only asset I had.

My legs.

As Steven was negotiating a hotdog stand I hitched up my dress, stuck my left leg out and tripped the little snot.

He landed face first into a big bowl of chilli.

It was a miracle I didn't get any on me.

Boy was I glad I bought that treadmill, not only did I look hot in this dress, but I didn't get out of breath chasing skips through the mall.

I was just congratulating myself when Lula, Macy's security and Mall security turned up. Steve was whipping chilli from his glasses and whimpering.

Once the security guards had caught their breath, the real fun began. It seems they couldn't work out who had jurisdiction. The Macy's guards thought they had as that was were it had started, but the mall guards argued that the food court was their turf .

I noticed that Steven had that "I see an opportunity to run" look in his eyes, but hadn't quite thought it all out yet.

I asked Lula who was slumped on a bench nearby if she had her cuffs on her. I took her wheezing to mean no.

Taking stock, I realised I only had one option. I sat down on the bench beside Lula and removed one of my shoes and rolled my stocking down my leg.

For a guy who was glued to my every movement Steve sure did look surprised when I bound his hands behind his back using only my stocking.

I'm nothing if not resourceful.