After the day at the market with Bosco, little changes began to emerge in our friendship. It truly was a friendship that I could live with and I was secretly thrilled over it. Even if we never became more than friends again I still had him watching my back. The only hard part was remembering what it was like to have him hold me and cuddle me close to his side and make me feel safe.
He seemed to be so shocked to see me wearing casual clothes that day, as if I couldn't possibly clean up and wear anything other than jeans and a t-shirt, but I liked it. Liked the way he stared at me with his eyes skimming up and down. He seemed to be nervous at seeing me dressed like a classy woman, and yet, I could tell he was pleased.
He had let me take his arm again after we got our ice cream and we went strolling through the market looking at all the vendors and their wares. We laughed a lot and made jokes about work and life and had such a good time I was sorry that we had to go to work.
He had walked me to the entrance, where we were going to part, and gave me a genuine smile of pleasure before reaching out and lightly rubbing my arm for a second. ' I'll see you later, Ritza.' He'd said softly before turning and walking left. 'Later.' I turned right and headed home to change into my street clothes.
Yoshi was back at work that day so we didn't need Bosco in Anti-crime but I did see him a few times during the shift, passing by him in the halls and at role call. He kept his smile small and tight, as if he were afraid that the good time we had at the market had ended at the gate. I was nervous too, for if he hurt me again I didn't think I could recover. Just ask any woman who has had what Maurice Boscorelli can give; He's all that and more and he can take you to a place that you've never been to before, but you would swear that you were home.
During the next two weeks, we met twice for lunch when Faith wasn't around and went to the Policeman's Ball together as 'friends', but I could have sworn that he didn't want to be my friend when he held me close as we were dancing, his cheek pressed against mine, his breathing soft against my neck. I knew that everyone was staring at us, wondering what was going on between him and I, but I didn't give a damn. I was where I wanted to be. And that was enough.
I felt myself falling for him all over again, but in a way that I hadn't before. The first time we were together we had fallen into bed on the night that my sister was killed. It had been physical for both of us, an animal attraction that couldn't be stopped. But this time, we were really getting to know one another and learning little things about each other that maybe no one else knew, except for Faith. It made me intensely jealous to think that she knew him better than I did. Hell, she had twelve years under her belt compared to me. But I had him. He was becoming mine all over again and it made me happy.
He had never been attracted to Faith in that way. He loved her, he respected her and he would lay down his life for her because she was his partner at work. But I knew, more than ever, that I was becoming his partner outside of work. And I loved it. She wasn't any competition for me, and as the days passed, I began to feel more secure in this new friendship that we had joined. The feelings of jealousy thinned until they were hardly there at all. I knew that Faith still hated me but she knew that she had to tread lightly because I could tell that every time I spent time with Bosco that he was falling for me too, and if I was a part of his life than she had to accept it or lose what they had.
The weird thing about it was that not once had either of us talked about what was going on, if anything. He was hard to read and I didn't make it perfectly clear what my intentions were. There were times that I thought he wanted to say something, but he never did.
Then one night after work a bunch of us went to Haggarty's for a beer. It had been a long shift and we were all tired and beaten down. We had been working on a case involving a pedophile who had raped and killed two small children. The scene was gruesome, with seeing the dead bodies of those small, innocent babies, who were now, nothing but bloody and broken. Their genitals badly mangled and their faces barely recognizable. It was one of the most horrific scenes I had ever seen and I wasn't prepared for it. Who could possibly be prepared for something like that? I swallowed back my own tears and turned and looked Bosco.
But what really threw me was the way that he could not handle what he saw. He was usually very animated and flapped his mouth a lot, but this time was different. This time he could barely keep it together long enough to look at the kids and not cry. His face contorted into a horrible, almost animalistic grimace, as he surveyed the scene. He put his hand over his mouth and muttered words that I could not hear, and looked away, terribly affected, as we all were.
Two new medics arrived who we had never met before. One, a tall African American male, and the other, a short Caucasian, female, were in a hurry to get the bodies and take them to the morgue. I disliked both of them immediately, as I'm sure everyone else did.
It wasn't just that they were in a hurry to get out of there, it was the way they looked at those poor children, with no feeling, no sympathy at all. The coroner had already established a time of death and the crime scene investigators had already collected the evidence and now it was time to put the children to rest.
'What a mess.' One commented dryly to the other as they approached the two children. Both were laying on their sides in a pool of their own blood, which was sticky and copper smelling. The little boy still clung to a small blue blanket, which was probably his only comfort in his last moments, if he had any.
'Let's get it over with. I gotta get back and get ready for dinner.' The woman said, making a face at the scene before her. 'Gross.'
She turned to face me, displeasure all over her snotty face. 'Couldn't you have got the coroner to clean this up before we got here? This is disgusting.' She said as she ripped the blanket out of the child's hand and threw it to the ground beside her.
In a flash Bosco was bending down and picking up the bloody blanket in his trembling hands, his face aflame with anger. He addressed the female with a scalding stare. ' Sorry this has been such an inconvenience to you. Why don't you just do your job at keep your damn mouth shut?'
She recoiled, as if he had slapped her face. ' Oh ya? Why don't you mind your own business? I don't get paid enough to pick up something as gross as this. You wanna do it?' She challenged, grimacing her ugly face at him.
He nodded furiously. 'Ya. I do. He deserves better than to have your cold bony hands touch his skin.' He yelled at her.
' Fine. Do what you like.' She muttered, stepping back and folding her arms over her chest.
Everyone stopped what they were doing to stare at his loss of control. Other officers stood back with twin expressions of anger and disgust on their faces. Seeing murdered children was always the hardest part of our job and no one was going to come to the aid of the two cold hearted paramedics.
I stepped forward and gently placed my hand on his shoulder. 'Bosco..let her do her job.'
He yanked out of my grasp and knelt down next to the boy and laid the blue blanket on the ground and gently rolled him over onto it. He wrapped the corners around him and tucked the ends under his cold chin and gently lifted him onto the stretcher.
The male paramedic stepped forward to get the little girl and Bosco held up his hand. 'Don't touch her. I got her.' He said and knelt down again and wrapped the child in a towel and placed her beside her companion in death.
The guy looked over at me with an expression of annoyance to see if I'd say anything to reprimand Bosco but I just stared at him with a disgusted look. He backed away and let Bosco do what had to be done.
Even though they were both dead and had died a terrible death, and there was no reason for him to have covered their small, battered bodies, he had done so with tenderness and sympathy. It was a far cry from the Bosco I had known before. He wanted them to be wrapped and shielded from the view of everyone else. He silently wiped a tear from his eye and turned to me.
' Let's go.'
He said it simply and with no demand. Just a request to leave this scene of horror and the images that were now permanently burned into our brains.
The mood at Haggerty's was somber and filled with little chatter, but lot's of drinking. Bosco had downed four shots to my one within the first ten minutes of being there. We all seemed anxious to put the day's horror behind us and drink away the tension and that always came after a hard case.
By one o'clock we had pretty much scattered to different tables and with different people. I didn't leave Bosco alone for a second, afraid that he couldn't be alone and decided to tell him that he could stay at my place for the night. The last thing either one of us needed was to face the rest of this night alone.
We walked to my place, or rather, I had to half drag him because he was so drunk. He hadn't mentioned a word about the days events but I knew they were still clearly in his mind, no matter how much alcohol he had consumed.
He put up no fight when I told him to take the bed, only sank back into the soft mattress and closed his eyes. I tucked him in and turned out the light and went into the living room and opened another beer. I sat down on my brown leather couch and flipped on the tv.
My mind was racing as I went through the channels and stopped to watch the news. A segment on the two children was playing, their faces flashed before me, making me want to throw up. All of a sudden, I could hold back no longer and the tears started to cascade down my face, hot and stinging, as I cried for two babies who would never again see the light of day or go to the park or see their parents.
We had contacted their parents, a wealthy Lousianna couple who had been vacationing in the area. It was the hardest thing in the world, looking at the young couple and telling them what had happened to their children. They were devastated, of course, and the mother had to be given a sedative. The kids were a set of twins, Dallas and Dana Pope, of Terrebonne Perish. They were only three years old. As I watched the news, a picture was put up of them, healthy and alive. They were brown haired, and blue eyed beauties who looked healthy and happy. I cried even harder. It made them more real to me, to see them as they were.
I jumped at the sudden touch of a hand on my shoulder. Bosco stood beside me, his face a mask of pain and torment as he slowly slid down beside me.
I shut my eyes and shook my head. 'I'm ok. I'm ok.' I chanted, trying to regain control.
He put his arm around me and squeezed tight. 'No..you're not...neither of us are ok...' He whispered tenderly.
I looked over at him, my eyes searching every part of his soul, and found myself needing him like I had never needed anyone before. He looked back, his eyes welling up with tears, as he fought to control is own emotions.
'Bos...' I croaked, turning and wrapping my arms around his neck. He clung to me and broke like a damn, his tears matching my own. We rocked back and forth, holding and comforting one another.
When we had both stopped crying, he pulled back and kissed my cheek. Impetuously, I leaned back and kissed him in the same place and like a tidal wave, we kissed each other over and over again until our lips met and held.
He pulled apart from me for a moment and studied my face. " Ritza...this...this can't happen...if it's only a one night thing...I can't let myself do this again...' He said earnestly, searching my face.
'What do you mean?' I asked.
' I want you...so much it kills me...but if this isn't going to be anything more than comfort...than I need to know...I'm crazy about you.' He breathed quickly.
I felt my heart soar at his words. 'I'm crazy about you too...and I don't want a one night stand...I want every night.' I confessed, my heart beating madly.
And so, he kissed me again and again, until we could no longer stand to be apart. In his eyes I drowned over and over again. His every kiss, every caress, meant to let me know how serious he was. He loved me. He told me again and again. And I responded. For the first time in my life.
No matter how long it took me to get there, I knew that I had found my place in life. It was easy to pretend that you didn't feel anything when you were amidst your daily routine...but at home, behind closed doors, the heart couldn't lie.
It never lies.
The End.
