There was blood dripping down his arm, by the time the phone rang. He jumped dropping the knife he had in his hand with a thunk, as it bounced on the cold floor. He looked at it.
"Hello?" He asked.
"Jess?" A female voice.
"I've been trying to get a hold of you, I left a few messages with Todd." Jess' mind flashed, it was Astoria, the brown haired girl, with the electric green eyes, he had met at a party. Jess could get lost in those eyes, he could forget everything, she had that power. He hadn't seen, or thought of her since he had returned from Stars Hollow. Meaningless sex was no longer on his agenda.
"I don't live there anymore."
"Is there somewhere we could meet, I want to talk to you."
"To me?" Jess asked, distracted.
"Yeah. We can meet anywhere." Her voice was shaking on the other line, she was trying to cover it up.
"You in Queens?"
"Yeah."
"How about the coffee shop on the corner, near your place." Jess' heart was beating at the thought of having to go see her, to see anybody. Deep down, Astoria still meant something to Jess, not like Rory ever did, but an affection, a mutual agreement for crappy times.
"Sure. About an hour?"
"Okay." Jess hung up the phone. He ran his still bleeding arm under the tap, smacked his hand on it, in attempt to stop the bleeding.
He cursed to himself quietly, lifting his hand up cautiously and staring at the print on his hand, his eyes followed the tiny ripples and swirls. He wiped his hand on his black pants and left slamming the door.
Astoria had clearly been sitting there for quite awhile, she had the paper spread out in front of her, a cup of coffee off to the side next to the small mountain of single serving sugar packets. Jess smiled briefly, she was beautiful, he just wished that he could truly feel something for her.
"Hey Jess." he noticed her eyes roaming over him, judging him. "Sit down." he did, rearranging her sugar mountain, drawing his finger through the left over granules on the table.
"Are you okay?" Her green eyes looked concerned.
"Are you?"
"Why don't we sit it at an equal no, on both sides." She finally said looking up at him.
"What is it?" Jess took a drink of Astoria's coffee and cringed at the sweetness, he placed down the cup next to her and smiled.
"Have I ever mentioned my parents to you?"
"Yeah." She had mentioned them one night, she had run away from home at fifteen, to escape them. To escape from bibles, and morals, church, and sins.
Jess' head was swimming as he drove back, he felt like his head was in a fog, he felt like he was floating above his body, not sure about the fledging amount of emotion running through his body at a rapid pace.
He slowed down, as he neared a backed up intersection, two cars were entangled together in the middle of the intersection, their owners out screaming at each other, sirens wailed in the distant. He came to a full stop. He didn't mind stopping, he didn't mind sitting, he had to think in his head. Then he heard a voice, that stopped all of his thoughts cold. All of this thoughts but one, the same thought that ran continuously through his head, that he could never stop. The thought that pushed him away from everybody. The man behind him was honking and hollering, shouting about his busy day. Jess pushed open his car door, and strode back to the car. Blood was pounding in his ears so fast, he couldn't even hear the sirens, or the shouting, or even his own breathing.
"You fucking bastard." Everything in his mind went blank then, as he opened the door to the blue pickup truck and wretched the man out of the car. Jess sprawled him out on the pavement, as all of his rage, anger and hate poured out of him, into this man. He couldn't stop hitting him. He didn't see the blood, he didn't feel the pain in his hands, the screams of the man beneath him. He could only feel his own hurt.
Luke was sitting in his apartment, trying desperately to figure out what had happened that morning with Jess, replying it in his head, and feeling guilty when the phone rang.
"Mr. Luke Danes?" Came the voice on the other end.
"This is he."
"Hello Mr. Danes, my name is Dr. Philip Robusk, and I'm a doctor at Bellevue psychiatric hospital and I am calling on behalf of your nephew Jess Mariano."
"Oh my god. He killed himself." Luke couldn't believe he had said the words out loud, he couldn't believe he had just walked out on him, he couldn't believe he had given him that knife.
"No he hasn't. Your nephew was arrested a few hours ago for beating a man nearly to death, he had to be heavily sedated and we now have him in the lockdown section of our hospital. We have been unable to pinpoint his medical history and your name was in his wallet."
"Beat a man to death? Why? Is he alright?"
"Is your nephew have any mental disorders, on any medication?"
"No, yes, I don't know. I just visited him this morning and he had all these cuts over his arms that he had made himself, and he had lost all this weight, he wasn't himself, he was a hollow shell of who he used to be.
Can I just come down there, can I see him? Make sure he's alright?"
"Yes that would actually be a good idea. However considering what time it is, it would probably best if you came tomorrow. The police will probably also have some questions for you at that time." Luke nodded mutely, as the doctor continued to talk on what time to arrive and directions.
"Alright, bye."
Luke hung up the phone and starred at it for a moment, then he looked over to Jess' bed, some of his left over books still sitting on the shelves.
"Oh my god." He took off at a run, and didn't stop until he reached Lorelai's door.
"Hey." She said opening the door.
"Hey." He was breathing hard and he wanted to do was fall into her arms and cry, but that wasn't the way it was between them.
"I fucked up."
"Welcome to the club honey." She replied rubbing his arm reasurredly.
"Jess was arrested today for trying to beat a man to death and is now heavily sedated at psychiatric hospital."
"Alright so maybe I can't beat that one."
