Donkey Kong 64 All Messed Up: Chapter 5
Armouryellow
Disclaimer: Do I really need to say it?
(When we last left the hero (Matt) and the zero (DK), the dumb DK kicked Stingy Kong off a cliff. What does Matt have to say about that?)
Matt: Pfft.
(The hero has spoken. Now, on with the story)
DK: Now I need to get to the boss.
The fat hippo: FEED HIM!
The small rhino: FEED ME!
Matt: No.
The small rhino: Fine. My friend here is very persuasive. (He cracks his knuckles)
The fat hippo: (In a whinging voice) C'mon feed him.
Matt: No
The fat hippo: C'mon. I'll be your friend.
Matt: Move fatty.
The fat hippo: I tried. (He moves out of the way. DK goes through the door.)
(When he enters he sees a huge armadillo with rockets and a yellow, steel shell.)
Amouryellow: FEE FI FO FUM! No wait, wrong story. TO BE THE MAN, WOOO, YOU GOTTA BEAT THE MAN! Getting closer… Oh Yeah, BRING IT ON YOU FLEA RIDDEN, VINE SWINGING, TREE HUGGING, BANANA EATING, ASSAULT RIFLE TOTING…
Matt: Mate, shut up.
Armouryellow: No. You shut up!
Matt: You shut up times infinity times…DK just shoot him.
DK: Righto.
(DK starts spraying bullets at Armouryellow. Unfortunately for DK, Armouryellow rolls into an armour ball and reflects all the bullets. Fortunately for the story, the bullets all ricochet into the crowd.)
Monkey Viewers and Kremlin Viewers: This is unacceptable. We've watched our fellow creatures being tortured, shot, slapped out of windows and blown up. This is the most…
(Matt pulls out some napalm)
Monkey Viewers and Kremlin Viewers: beautiful thing I've ever seen.
(Anyway. DK waits until Armouryellow is out of his ball. DK just walks up and slaps him. Armouryellow gets so offended he rolls out of the window. As an addition, he rolls over them pesky monkey viewers)
Monkey Viewer: OI!
Matt: (Sighs) When will they ever learn?
(Matt drives his McLaren over him)
Well it looks like a boss is beaten and a key is found. What does DK do with the key? What will happen in the next chapter? Find out in Chapter 6: Alzheimer's Aztec
