Some Random Story
By Lady Leah of Chaos
With Some Help From Belle Mortis
BM: If you don't like random stories about me and my messed up friends, go and burn in hell. Have fun reading! –Rose
LLOC: I am NOT messed up! I'm just a freak, and believe me, I am goddamn proud of it! –Leah
Chapter 1:
Class Worm Holes
"As you know, people used to think the world was flat," Mr. Hunter told the class, "But we all know that they were wrong. The world was discovered to be round." Rose looked at Leah, shaking her head. As usual Leah had her objections. She waved her hand impatiently. Mr. Hunter had to answer or Leah would get angry. Her blond hair framed her tiny pale face as she looked at her teacher with interest.
"Rose and I have a theory that the world, despite the contrary belief that you ignorant mortals seemed to have made along with your belief that Bush is the best president since his stupid father, is flat. You see, many exploration stories claim that nearly all ships encounter a storm near the center of the Pacific Ocean. We believe that this storm is caused by a wormhole effect that lines the edges of the earth, transporting a traveler to corresponding hole on another side of the surface. These portals of time and space also seem to cause an illusion that, when viewed from outer edges, appears to form a spherical shape."
"Very interesting, Leah," Mr. Hunter said with a disbelieving look upon his face. "Unfortunately, the roundness theory has been proven many times…" His voice trailed off as the lights in the classroom suddenly dimmed, and a faint whirling noise was heard in the air.
"What's going on here?" Rose said in an inaudible whisper. As she spoke, a swirling mass of energy materialized in the exact center of the blackboard. A howling wind began to rush through the room as Leah and Rose began to drift towards it.
Leah smiled knowingly at Mr. Hunter. "So much for wormholes not existing, huh?" Before he could answer, the wormhole sucked Leah and Rose in.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Shit!" Rose fell onto the ground and landed on her bum. But it wasn't just ordinary ground. It was a cactus field! "Ouch!"
"Who's that over there?" Leah asked Rose. She wandered over to another spot in the field where there were more people attempting to climb out of the cactus
"Hope? Cat? Maren? Becky? What the heck are you doing here?" Leah as, surprised.
"There was a black hole in the gym!" Becky said.
"It wasn't a black hole, it was a wormhole," said Hope.
"Awesome! There was a wormhole in third period too!" Rose put in.
"Umm… why where you at the gym? Weren't you supposed to be at school?" Leah said, "It's not fair. How come I had to put up with Mrs. Jones?"
"Ha ha!" Rose laughed, "I don't have her till fourth!"
"Shut up."
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Yes."
"No."
"Uh, sorry to interrupt your oh so important argument, but does anyone know where we are?" Cat interrupted.
"Maybe we're in Emelan. We could meet Briar!" Leah began to swoon.
"Naw, I think we're in Tortall. Wherever that is," Rose added.
"To Corus, then! We shall stalk Neal and Owen!"
"No, I don't think so," Maren said as they walked off into the sunset (even though it's 11 in the morning).
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Leah and company walked up to Corus, where trumpets began to blare.
"Corus!"
"Corus!"
"Corus!"
"It's only a model."
"Shh…"
The authoress then smacked herself on the head and muttered, "Quit the Monty Python references…"
"That was strange," said Cat.
"Most definitely," Rose agreed.
"Can we get going?" Leah asked. "I wanna get to the palace."
"I suppose so," Rose said, knowing what Leah's reaction would be if she refused. That being said, they headed up the hill.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
As Leah led the way, they met up with some people in a practice court. Leah screamed. "Omigod, Rose, it's Owen!"
"Who?"
"Shut up," Leah said as she ran into the court.
Owen looked up. "You."
"Yup, it's me!" The others stared blankly. "Don't ask."
"What are you doing here?" Owen asked. "I thought you took you and your rabid fangirls back to the real world!"
"Well, Rosie and me are back!"
"Great. Just great. How'd you get back, anyway? I thought they locked you out of the portal."
"Well, it's all a matter of time and space," Leah said, then noticed Owen was staring blankly at her, "And I'm afraid that's all you mind will be able to hold."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"So, you want to be pages," Padraig HaMinch said dryly, "That's an interesting request."
"Well, ya, we do," Rose said.
"All of the six of us," Becky added.
Padraig shook his head. "Wonderful. Simply wonderful."
All stood in silence for a minute. Maren was the first to speak. "Sooo… When do we start?"
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The six girls stood outside one room, waiting. "When do we get picked?" Rose whispered to Leah.
"No idea. Eventually, I suppose," Leah responded confidently. As she spoke, a bell rang. "Apparently now."
They headed down to the larger area in the hallway, were they joined a bunch of boys standing by the wall. The training master walked up to each boy by turn, asking his name, his holdings, and chose a sponsor. Finally, he got to them. "Names and holdings?"
"Err… Becky of Lobosco?"
"Catherine of Ardoin."
"Maren of Rey."
"Hope of Wahlbrink."
"Rose of Schwienhart."
"Leah of Sweetspring," was Leah's answer. She shrugged when Rose glanced at her. "Mine had to be more interesting."
"Whatever," Rose said dryly.
"Alright, now who will sponsor them?" HaMinch asked the older boys. A few boys raised their hands. "Yanholm, you sponsor those three," he said, pointing to Hope, Becky, and Maren. "Tirrismont, those three." He pointed at Cat, Rose, and Leah. "And, Sweetspring," he added, looking at Leah, "No trouble."
"Who, me?" Leah asked, all too innocent.
"Don't play innocent. We gave Jesslaw a new room that you don't know of."
Leah swore obscenely. "Language, Sweetspring. One bell of polishing armor on Sunday night. You may all go."
Leah grinned mysteriously. "Of course, sir."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Owen sat on his bed, reading the letter that had been delivered to him. Lord Wyldon had been home for 2 days, and would not return till Monday. His letter said that he was to clean armor on Sunday night to keep his strength after lazing for a few days. That made sense.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Leah, get up!" Rose yelled in Leah's ear.
"It's to early," Leah moaned, "Don't you listen? We don't start till tomorrow!"
"Really?" Rose asked incredulously. "Well, get up anyway. Mark is taking us on a tour and he's waiting,"
"You learned his name?!" Leah gasped, surprised.
Rose blushed. "You will too. He's sexy!" Leah rolled her eyes.
"How could he be sexy?" Maren asked, "He's probably a dumbass jock who has no brain cells!"
Rose glared at her. "Just get up and get dressed."
"Thank the Goddess I remembered my jeans," Leah heaved a sigh of relief, "Imagine being forced into a dress!" Rose shuddered.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
"Uh, you look… interesting," Mark said with a very fake smile.
"Thanks," Leah said, "I try." She was wearing blue jeans, a dragon t-shirt, and vampire fangs. She has in red contacts, and a razor sharp spiked choker. Rose was wearing a blue and black t-shirt and cargo pants. She had fake blood around her mouth, hawk yellow contacts, and a knife in her hair. The others looked relatively normal. Well, normal for four modern American girls trying to pass for medieval pages. Which wasn't very normal.
"Damn, this blood is itchy. I'm taking it off," Rose complained, and ran to the bathroom to take it off. Three minutes later, she returned with a bloodless face. "Leah, take back your dumb fake knife, it's bugging me!" She threw it in Leah's face and it bounced off of the said face.
Leah smiled when Mark stared. "Yes, I am immune to knives."
Rose stared. "I thought that was fake!"
"Well, it's not," Leah replied. "See?" she said as she sliced a spike off the choker she wore.
"Holy shit!" Mark said, wide eyed.
"My lord would give you punishment work for that," Leah said superiorly.
"Stop CENSORED telling me the CENSORED obvious!"
"Shut the CENSORED up," Rose yelled
"NO!" Leah and Mark yelled at the same time. Leah smiled, showing sharp teeth. "Mutual yelling? How interesting."
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The day came and went as fast as you could say "An angry cheesmuffin ran over a blue cow and ate a pink happy block." Which isn't very fast. It went on, Leah and Rose threatening people, Mark talking to his friends, Leah and Rose scaring his friends away, so on and so forth. Finally, night came, and the six girls headed back to the room they shared. They changed for the night, and got in their beds.
"Does anyone want to play truth or dare?" Maren asked once they were settled.
"Just with us?" Cat asked incredulously.
"That's no fun."
"Well, then lets go nab some boys, shall we?" Leah said as she and Rose snuck out the door.
