It seems I have an apology to make. Dearest NKB, I admit my fault. Thank you for also being here. Please accept my humblest apologies and…this block of Wensleydale cheese. I'm glad you enjoy my little comments. I do fear that, at times, I am slightly annoying. Interrupting your story with my frivolous jokes. Yet it seems my input is appreciated. Fare thee well in life.

Also, Hasty. A newcomer to my green land of comedic value. Welcome.

I fear you may all be disappointed in me. This is the last chapter. So soon! I admit it may be wrong…yet this was written in my youth, and I possess no TARDIS with which to travel back and lengthen your enjoyment. Therefore, I bestow on you the second and final part, gentle readers.

Yours Faithfully,

Eevee Louella Crumblefoot

AKA EeveeKitty85

Crawdie: I think being frozen damaged your brain.

I was frozen! Really? Like Austin Powers?

Crawdie: Yeah, sometime about the Tudor era.

Damn thee to the firey pit, lizard!

Crawdie: (sigh) Here's the last part.


Meanwhile, Tracey was holding a map in the middle of a raging blizzard. "Where is Happy Little Elf Town?" he asked an Eskimo. The Eskimo looked at him and ran away screaming.

(Translated) "Aaaahhh! The gay headband wearing one! I must tell the king!" Minutes later, Tracey was bundled into an igloo that had bars over the windows and a high security door. Two burly Eskimos stood outside.

(Translated) "He is the so called 'watcher'," said one, named Pingu.

(Translated) "Perv," said Mika.


"…Jessie and James for their part in Team Rocket: The Movie!" Jessie screamed.

"Omigod!" she said. James pulled her up.

"Come on, don't just sit there," he said. Together they made their way to the stage. Jessie found she didn't trip. The adrenaline, the thing actors rely on most, is what got her through. She felt like she was floating. Terry handed them the award. It looked like a twisted flame of glass, and it had a black marble base with their names and 'Best Newcomers' inscribed on it. They stepped up to the microphone. They had agreed earlier that Jessie would do the talking. They didn't want James to say 'Oooh' on live TV.

"Wow," said Jessie, looking at the award. "What can I say? Thank you so much for everyone who saw the movie. I know people say this all the time, but we really couldn't have done it without you. Um…a big thank you to everyone who helped make the movie, especially the director 'Miss Comedic Value' and to all the others who acted in it. We had a great time and this belongs to them as well as us." Misty and Kate did unison reaching-for-the-tissues. At this point Jessie started crying. James took over.

"Just some acknowledgments: to Kate, Barlow and Spasm, more commonly known as Team Hornio. To Team Twerp, including Tracey, who sadly couldn't make it today. We owe you nothing, nothing at all, but you've been good for a laugh."


Later, Jessie and James sat together on their sofa, looking at the award.

"I can't believe we won," said Jessie. "But where are we gonna put this thing?"

"It's gonna look pretty daft on the mantelpiece," James agreed. He stretched lazily and put his arm around Jessie. She snuggled up to him. "Maybe we should build a trophy case. I have some tools."

"And I have a personal hotline to DIY SOS," said Jessie. "Maybe we should give it to charity."

"No way! This is ours," said James.

"As if I'd give it away." Jessie leant forwards and put the award on the coffee table. She liked being able to lean back and once more fall into James's arms.

"I love you James," she said fondly.

"I love you too," said James, kissing her. A sudden thought struck him like a snowball. "Hey, I wonder what happened to Tracey?"

"He'll turn up. He always does, unfortunately," said Jessie, rolling her eyes.


Far far away, but not quite far enough for my liking, Tracey sat in his prison/igloo, his teeth chattering.

"Um, guys? I'm getting kinda cold in here," he called to his guards.

(Translated) "Should we answer him?" asked Pingu.

"Why should we?" asked Mika. "He's better paid than us, is in a cartoon, has DOTters…"

"DOTters?"

"Defenders of Tracey. All that, and everyone hates him."

"Good point." Pingu got out a toboggan. "Wanna come tobogganing?"

"Sure." They sped off together on the toboggan. Inside the igloo, Tracey called out to no one.

"Pingu? Mika? Anyone? I don't wanna be an icicle!" There was no answer, only the swish of a toboggan and hysterical, Eskimo laughter.


I know, I know, it was short…but hopefully sweet! - Anyway, it was necessary for one purpose and one purpose only: to introduce Pingu and Mika to you all. The rest of the mystery will be unravelled soon, but you'll be seeing a lot more of my two favourite Eskimos (or should I more correctly say Inuits? I don't want to offend. Mainly because that's Crawdie's job, but also because I don't really get on with igloo prison cells.) Until next time, gentle readers! See you in cyberspace!

Yours Respectfully,

Gravis Mushnick.

Crawdie: What's wrong with you!

What! I can dream…someday, I will own a flower shop…and then the world will be mine…mwah ha ha ha ha!

Crawdie: I worry about you.

Mwah ha ha ha!