Story: My Diary
Author: J.E.A.R.K.Potter
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or the characters that are made up. They own themselves. I do own the plot, though. Well, I'd better own the plot. I have to own my life, don't I?

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Thanks to my reviewers!! Erin from J.E.A.R.K.Potter, helloppl reviewed chapter 8, a new reviewer named sugaslove, BubblyBubbles365, scorpio-1983, and another new reviewer, Lunalovegood!! Thanks, ya'll!!

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Entry 22
8-29-97

Dear Diary,

I was really happy yesterday. Only Luna and the ones I bothered to tell about my wrist have noticed. Hell, then no one's noticed I've become bulimic! Of course, not today...

I talked to Harry a little bit. We haven't really talked since he started dating Lavender. Ron said something like he doesn't want Lavender and I to talk... Oh, who knows?

Towards the end of the night, I was talking to Grace. She said she'd met Harry and now had a better understanding of him. I was like, of course! Who couldn't not know Harry...

She then said she'd just left him with Lavender. It dawned on me He was at Lavender's because she was at her house! I started bawling, Diary, I was so upset. I was there, laughing, then...

I'm never going to be happy again, am I? There's almost no way I can...

I'm sorry to leave you with such a short entry, but I'm starting to cry again. You know how well that goes along with me, don't you?

I'm not going to go yet, I guess. I'm... For now, done with crying. I noticed I never mentioned that Lavender stripped for Harry with her little sister, Rose, watching, did I? Yeah... Down by a stream a ways from the Burrow. Diary, that was suppose to be the gangs place!! Not Harry and Lavender's fucking place!!

Now I'm mad at Lupin. Why did he have to let Lavender and Rose be with Harry today? He always use to say how cute Harry and I were together...

--Looks at wrist-- I hope no one notices about them, now. There's like... Five cuts. Two of them are really deep. I used glass on them and I think they got some of it in them I hope I don't have to go to the doctor's for this!!...
-Hermione

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Entry 23
8-30-97

Dear Diary,

I had to break up with Justin today. Don't get me wrong; he was really sweet, for the one time I got to actually be with him. He always asked that day if he could go be with his friend or if he needed to stay with Parvati and me. See? He was sweet...

My heart just wasn't there, you know. I'm so wrapped up on that asshole, Harry; I don't think my heart is ever going to really be in another relationship.

With Harry's name mentioned already... He's still going with that cunty ass fucking slutty whore Lavender. Really, some friend she was! Oh, yeah, he's avoiding me. He's actually scared because he thinks I'm going to jinx his sorry no good ass into 2004! Like I could ever be that mean to him... Hey, mate, doesn't school start tomorrow?

Oh my Merlin!! It DOES!! I've totally forgotten!! I guess with this summer, my mind hasn't really been thinking that this is my final year. This, unlike any other year, is my last year at Hogwarts. Sure, I'm going to miss it, but I think Mum is making me take one year of muggle high school, then go to a muggle college. Mum said, I think, that I'll probably get into some really good college. I do believe Mr. Weasley is going to ask Dumbledore for Mum if he could 'make' me a fake muggle school thing.

Well, since there's school tomorrow, I'm going to end this short. I do need to get some sleep!
-Hermione

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Entry 24
9-1-97

Dear Diary,

Everyone is use to seeing you by now around school! I got a warm welcoming from all my school friends. It's really hard to believe that this is my last year of Hogwarts!

Harry's back for the last year, go figure every chick again wants him. Don't I just feel sooooo sorry for him that's he's got Lavender, and can't go around SCREWING them others...

I didn't make head girl. Dumbledore says I let my grades slip too much last year. God, they've only slipped down a little!!

You'll never believe who everyone also thinks is hott this year. Let's just say, we all just found out he has magical powers. What sucks now is the fact that the Dursley's don't have to deal with Dudley, WE DO! Poor Lupin is stuck with the lard ass...

That reminds me. Christine, remember, Lupin's little cousin? She had to go back to her normal home. At least she'll be back every other weekend like when I'm usually home!!

Okay, that's enough of the perky talk. You know me by now that I'm just dying to burst out into tears. I saw Harry messing around and snogging Lavender after classes. Merlin, how much I wish I could have been in her place today!! At least Ginny told him about my wrist, and she told me she saw him fucking about ready to cry, because he KNOWS
that it's his fault...

There's no way in hell I'm going to be able to make it through this year, Diary. I can't stand having her in some of my classes!! The cunty ass hoe, I mean.

At least Ron's happy with Parvati and Ginny's happy chasing after Draco and trying to kill Lavender. Do you think it will be possible for me to be happy, ever, again?
-Hermione

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Entry 25
9-17-97

Dear Diary,

I shouldn't be laughing, I should feel sorry for Lavender, but I don't. All night Harry and I were owling each other back and forth. I found out some information I've needed to know for a while, now! All Harry wanted out of Lavender was a blowjob and that's only because Ron said Lavender put out a lot, to Harry? All they've done really besides
her little strip show was kiss!

Yeah! I couldn't believe it! Of course, Ron's doing the big brother thing for me and he's trying to win Lavender over again for himself. Yes, Parvati knows. Since Parvati and Ron began dating, Lavender and Parvati have hated each other, really.

Now, with Harry, he asked me if he could sneak over and we could have some 'fun'. You can only guess with the way Harry's mind has turned on him what he wanted.

He was also asking a bunch of personal questions. I'm not going to write them down but they are VERY personal... So yeah...

I wish I could write down that I said no but you should know me better than that. It's like I can't say no to Harry! Let's say... Ron asked for answers to a Potions problem that was very complex, sure, I'd help him, but I'd never give him the answer, Harry, though? I'd help him with it, give him the answer, and then do the rest of it!! I think that's why people always have Harry ask me things instead of them...

There was only one thing: He had to sneak out. Mc Gonagall's really buckled down. Seems the cloak wouldn't even work!! Harry couldn't get into my dorms.

I'm supposed to keep quiet. We're going to keep this on the down low. You know I'm going to tell Luna, though. I tell Luna everything!

Now I'm really regretting cutting my stomach open. I have a huge, deep slit right across my stomach. I bloody think I got glass in it, again!! --Sighs--
-Hermione
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Entry 26
9-20-97

Dear Diary,

Yes!!!!! Harry broke up with Lavender!!! I hope she fucking feels good, the bitch!!!

One thing, I don't!!... OW!!!!!!!!! My stomach hurts like no other! This is short, but yeah... I'm in class, so I can't write much... (Well you idiot it will hurt if you cut it how many times did I tell you that! –Erin)
-Hermione

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(A/n -- I too wish that Harry would go through some pain for what he's done to Hermione. There's only one thing, Hermione and Harry have drifted apart and she doesn't know what's going through Harry's head. Right now, at least. She finds out later (this isn't in an entry, so I'll tell ya'll now) that Harry was crying through most of her self-
mutilating. -- Jackie)