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For copyright and disclaimers, please see chapter 1

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10 - Classes, Week Seventeen, First Year
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Monday, December 21, 1998:
Hogwarts, Greenhouse One
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The bell rang, and Professor Sprout looked up at the clock, adding, "Oh, my! Homework, dears!" People groaned, and she said with a smile, "Come now! Your assignment is to have a very Happy Christmas, and I'll see you back on the fourth!"

She smiled, and moved off toward her office. I said to Sprink and the others, "I've got a question for her. Go on, and I'll see you at lunch." I collected my books, and knocked on the Professor's office door. "Professor? Got a minute?"

She waved me in, and I closed the door. "What can I do for you, Miss Wayne?"

"Not so much for me, but for Arthur Morton, Professor," I said as I took a seat. "He and the Cortez sisters are flying back with me to the States. They and their families are invited to stay with us in Gotham for Christmas Eve, because our flight will be getting in late." She nodded, and I continued, "The Cortez family isn't that far away in New York, but Arthur's family is in Columbus; his father's work schedule won't allow him to join us in Gotham for Christmas." She tutted, and I asked, "Is there anything you can do?"

"I certainly can!" she exclaimed. "I'll have Harry create a portkey or two for him, and I'll ask Fawkes to deliver it in time. There's no reason they can't be together for Christmas!"

"Um, Professor? Could you not mention Professor Harry or me?" I asked. "Arthur doesn't like Professor Harry, and he'd probably reject them if he knew they came from him."

"Oh. I'll have Albus create them, then. He does get along with the Headmaster, I hope?" I nodded, and she smiled at me, and said, "Thank you for letting me know, dear. With your caring heart, you should have been in Hufflepuff!"

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Tuesday, December 22, 1998:
Hogwarts, History of Magic classroom
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Professor Binns floated through the blackboard, and said in a monotone, "Welcome back to History. To continue with recent Goblin events, in early July, 1505, Queen Alferta the Flatulent..." Several heads went 'thunk' and snores were heard.

Arthur passed me a note, 'You SURE I have a ride back?'
I rolled my eyes, and replied, 'Of course! My dad said so, didn't he? It may be a couple days early because of the network installation, but that's ok, isn't it?' I paused, then added, 'You can help us pull cable or something.'
'Ha. Ha,' he replied. 'I don't mind a bit of honest work if I can see the infamous Slytherin common room (lined out) torture chamber!'
'Ha. Ha,' I replied. 'You can see plenty of it from our rack!'

Binns droned on, "...taxation on the brewers of firewhiskey was..."

------------------------

"Settle down, settle down. Pass your homework forward." Professor Snape appeared, robes billowing as the door slammed. He walked along the row, collecting the assignments, and dumping them on his desk. "Today, we will be conducting a quiz regarding useful personal potions." He glowered at us, and added, "If you dunderheads recall anything of what I have laboured to teach you, you will perform adequately. If not..." he glared at the Gryffs, "... you will fail." He waved his wand at the board, and it filled with his cramped handwriting. "You have one hour. Begin."

The Professor turned the hourglass, and said, "Quills down, pass your answers forward." I did so, and he waved his wand, muttering a charm. The stack of parchment blurred for a bit, and he added, "Never let it be said I am unwilling to experiment. Indeed, that takes up a great proportion of my time. This charm aligns your handwriting, and hides the name on each sheet. Each of you will now relieve the burden of my deciphering your scribbles, and will be grading your classmates. You will not know whose paper you are grading, it may even be your own." He glowered, then said, "I will, of course, be reviewing and... summarizing your answers." He picked up the stack, and passed them back, adding, "You will find a fresh quill and a bottle of red ink in your desks. The first question was: 'List the five qualities of a bezoar.' The first quality is..."

------------------------

I groaned as I sat down at the Slytherin table for dinner. Terry looked over at me, and asked, "Bad day?"

"Pop quiz in Potions," I admitted. "My brain hurts."

"Look at it this way, maybe you can hex him tonight at the DA meeting," Terry suggested. "You were lucky, he usually assigns homework just before Christmas every year. I'll take a quiz over homework every time."

"Could be worse," Karen said. "He expects every Slytherin to get at least an 'Acceptable' in Potions and Herbology for their OWLs. If you think first and third years are hard, wait until fifth!"

"Seventh year NEWTS," Ian said, shaking his head. "You start studying for it in January of your sixth year."

"Teaching," Professor Harry said as he walked by. "If nothing else, being able to read a printout instead of deciphering handwriting will make this computer installation worthwhile." Terry budged over, and he took a seat. "My goal this year is to have every one of my OWL and NEWT students get an 'Acceptable' in Defense." He took a bite from an apple, then swallowed and said, "None of my students are going to be helpless if they have to fight. That's one reason you can hex the staff at the DA. It sharpens you by taking on someone more powerful, it's stress relief on both sides, and I can remember wanting to hex a professor or two."

"Or a student?" Karen asked with a grin.

Professor Harry returned the grin, and echoed, "Or a student. I'm proud of you Slythies, by the way. Your entire house comes to the DA, well, except for Professor Trelawney, and you don't have to."

"Who else doesn't come, Professor?"

"One Gryff, one 'Puff, and Mr. Filch doesn't," he sighed. "It's a club, it's supposed to be fun, not a class, so I can't make them." He shrugged, then said, "I was thinking of trying another boggart as a Dementor tonight, but I don't want to ruin everyone's Christmas by frightening them. What do you think?"

"I vote for the Dementor, it can't be any worse than Gotham after dark, " I said.

"Mattie, what is your hometown like?" Terry asked with a worried look.

I shrugged, and asked, "What can I say? Gotham's got the highest crime rate in North America, the most martial arts dojos in the world outside Tokyo, and the highest rate of firearm possession." I bit a carrot, then smiled, and added, "It's also got the finest research labs in the country, one of the top ten universities in North America, and the second-busiest deepwater port. It's got the finest restaurants, and the most cutting-edge fashion. It's a city where you can dance on the razor's edge in the moonlight."

I finished the carrot, then added, wistfully, "It's hell on earth, and heaven. It's home."

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Wednesday, December 23, 1998:
Hogwarts, Slytherin House, First year girl's dorm
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"Cindy?"

With a 'pop', the house-elf materialized, and asked, "Yes, Mistress Wayne? What can Cindy do for Mistress?"

"Did you get all the presents taken care of?"

The elf vigorously nodded her head. "Yes, Mistress Wayne! Cindy does what she is told! Cindy is a good house-elf!"

"Yes, you are. Just a minute, please." I rooted around in my trunk, and came up with a small wrapped gift. "This is for you, Cindy. Have a Merry Christmas."

The elf staggered back in shock. "Mistress, Cindy cannot accept this from Mistress! Cindy is a good house-elf! Cindy..."

"...Cindy will accept the present from Mistress Wayne, or Cindy will make Mistress Wayne unhappy," I interrupted. The suggestions from Professor Harry and Hagrid had been invaluable. "Mistress Wayne hopes that her present will make Cindy the house-elf very happy. Now, I need to get my trunk upstairs to the Common Room."

"Mistress will do no such thing! Trunks is the work of house-elves! Cindy will take care of Mistress' trunk!" With a snap of her fingers, both the trunk and Cindy vanished. I shook my head, then closed the door after me.

"Ah, Miss Wayne. Before you depart, I wish to inspect your trunk." I glanced at Professor Snape, then nodded and unlocked it for him. He poked the contents with his wand, then dropped a small parcel in, casting a few charms. He stepped back, and extracted a jewel on a small chain from a pocket. He gave it to me, saying "I have taken the liberty of arranging for a temporary permit for you with the American Ministry. Place this around your neck and do not remove it for any reason until you see me again." I looked at him, and he added, "While I am confident of your ability to protect yourself from Muggles, this will allow you to perform magic legally if necessary. You are one of my students, and I would be remiss if I did not consider the possibility. If you do need to perform magic, I trust you remember the memory charms I have taught you?"

"Yes sir. Thank you," I said, tucking the jewel under my shirt.

He gave me a thin smile, adding, "My pleasure. The parcel is a tracking device, and will allow your family to find you if necessary. Place your wand and any other magical items in your trunk before you depart your aeroplane in the United States, Miss Wayne. I have placed concealment and confundus charms on it, so nosy Muggle officials will not discern them. Your familiar?"

"Professor Hagrid said he'd take care of her, because of the British Quarantine laws."

"Just so." His mouth twitched, and he nodded, adding, "Have a Happy Christmas, and a safe journey."

"You too, Professor, you too."

------------------------

"Bit strange, being a Wednesday and not being in Charms now," Andrew Kirke said as the Hogwarts Express moved south toward London.

"Or wearing that bloody skirt. I've been freezing the last few months!" Amanda Leeds said, and the other girls nodded with me. She cleared her throat, and asked, "I had a ... request of the lot of you. Do you mind terribly if I join your study group when we return in January? You lot seem to be doing so well."

"I don't know..." one of the Cortez twins said. "You Gryffies are awfully thick sometimes," she said with a grin.

"Bloody Yanks!" Andrew said. "You lot are getting all 'Outstanding' in everything?"

I snorted, and admitted, "Hardly. Transfig is my worst subject."

"Herbology's my worst," Arthur admitted. "Potions is reasonably easy if you follow directions."

I nodded, and the two Gryffs shuddered, Andrew muttering, "Snape's a bloody overgrown bat." Sprink and I glanced at each other, nodded, and I moved next to him. While Sprink distracted him by moving her wand in flashy circles, I touched a pressure point on his neck, then scooted away while Sprink mumbled and shot green sparks at him. I moved away as he slid over toward Amanda, snoring.

"What did you do to him!" Amanda screeched.

"A bit of secret Slytherin magic," Sprink announced loftily. "Don't insult our Head of House again, we have entire libraries of Dark Magic to use!" She ostentatiously stowed her wand, then seated herself; saying, "I agree, Potions is easy enough if you slow down, think and follow the directions."

"Those of you from ... lesser Houses may have trouble with your studies," one of the Cortez sisters sneered. "However, we of Ravenclaw have no such difficulties."

"We are so going to kick your butt on January ninth!" I declared. "That snitch is MINE!"

"Just let the rest of us toy with them a bit first Mattie," Sprink said with an evil cackle. "Like we did with Gryffindor last month. The Ballistic isn't our only new move, just the only one we've decided to reveal."

"Better you than we," Charlie said to the sisters, adding, "Didn't I see a certain Ravenclaw from New York having trouble in Astronomy last week?"

"A lie! Jupiter simply ... moved!" Roshawn (I think) said desperately.

------------------------

I popped through the barrier at Platform 9 3/4, and looked about. The train had pulled in a few minutes early... "Over there, guys!" I called, waving to the young man who stood, holding a small sign that said "Wayne".

"Miss Wayne? I'm Farnsworth from WayneCorp London. Please come with me."

"Just a minute, Mr. Farnsworth," I asked, fingering my wand. "What's the challenge?"

"Um," he fumbled a card out of his pocket, and read, "'Professor Harry is eight feet and hairy.' The reply is?"

"'His eyes are green.' We're cool, guys, he's authentic."

"Good, you're paranoid," Arthur muttered.

I dropped back to walk with him, and whispered, "There were four kidnapping attempts on me last year."

"So the question isn't 'are you paranoid?' The question is 'are you paranoid enough?" Arthur asked with a grin.

------------------------

I went through a similar challenge/response when the van pulled up at the Lear. Arthur's eyes bugged out a bit, and he whispered, "Do you know how much one of these costs?"

"Dunno," I said. "Twenty, thirty million?" I called to the cabin attendant, "Excuse me, I'd like the trunks in the cabin, please."

"Yes, ma'am," she replied. I waved my friends aboard.

------------------------

The attendant made sure we were buckled in, and we took off. With a 'ding', the seatbelt light went off, and she came back in the main cabin, telling us, "My name is Susan O'Reilly, and if there's anything I can do for you, please don't hesitate to ask." She lowered her voice, and added, "I'm also a graduate from the Salem Institute, so I know what a wand does. The flight crew will not go aft of the forward head except in an emergency, so you can talk freely." She stood up, and said in a louder voice, "We'll be cruising at 43,000 feet, flight time to Gotham is eight hours ten minutes, which includes a layover for fuel in Reykjavik, Iceland. Arrival in Gotham is estimated at 7:45 p.m. local time. The home office in Gotham has been notified of our departure from Gatwick. Can I get you anything to eat or drink?"

"Do you want to call home?" I asked Arthur and the twins. The twins nodded, and I leaned over to Arthur, and whispered, "Go ahead, I don't mind. Call them, let them know you're ok."

He glanced up from the textbook he'd just taken out, and replied, "Thanks, but I can wait."

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During the second leg of the flight, the intercom came on, and I looked up as the pilot said, "If you look out the port side, you'll see Superman flying about fifty feet away." Even Susan scrambled to look as Uncle Clark waved at us, a smile on his face. I whispered, "Thanks, Uncle Clark." He waved again, gave us a thumbs-up, then dove out of sight.

I looked at Arthur, and said, "You're SURE you don't want to call home?"

He snorted, "And miss the look on my sister's face when I tell her I saw Superman?"

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With a thump and a screech, we touched down. The intercom came on again, and the pilot said, "Welcome to Gotham City. The temperature is thirty-nine degrees with a southern wind, and once we finish taxiing, we'll be waiting on Customs clearance. Thank you for flying with us, and have a Merry Christmas."

I looked at my friends, and said, "Any magical stuff like your wand, throw them in my trunk. Professor Snape put charms on it to hide them from Muggles." I looked at Susan, and said, "You too."

"I'm good, thanks anyway," she said.

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"Aunt Sheila!" I called, and she moved into a hug. "Thanks for coming! How is everyone?"

"Everyone's fine, do you guys want anything to eat? We're picking up Lois and Clark in about half an hour, so we've got some time."

I glanced at my friends, then said, "I need to get something out of my trunk, so maybe hot chocolate would be good. Guys, I'd like you to meet one of my godparents, Sheila Hawking. Aunt Sheila, these are the Cortez twins from New York, Roshawn and Shaundra, and Arthur Morton from Columbus." I lowered my voice, and added, "She knows about the school."

"Well, there's a coffee shop down where the domestic flights are. Let's pick up your luggage, and get a drink while we wait. Let's keep together, now," Aunt Sheila said.

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"Aunt Lois! Uncle Clark!" They crouched down for a hug, and I started the introductions again. "Everyone, these are two more of my godparents, Lois Lane and Clark Kent of Metropolis. You know Aunt Sheila, of course, and this is Arthur Morton of Columbus, and Roshawn and Shaundra Cortez of New York." I looked at Sheila, and asked, "Where's Uncle Doc?"

"He's at the hospital visiting some old friends, he'll be out at the Manor later," she told me. "Your Mom is at the Manor with Dick and Barbara, Bruce was finishing up something at work, he'll meet us at the Manor."

"What about our folks?"

Uncle Clark loaded our luggage and trunks onto a cart as Sheila replied, "The Cortez family arrived a couple hours ago by car, they're at the Manor. Want to call them?" They nodded, and she pulled a cell phone out of her purse, speed dialing the Manor and passing it over. She continued, "Mrs. Morton arrived with some of your brothers and sisters a while ago. I understand there's another arrangement with your father?" Arthur nodded, and Sheila added, "Girls, let Arthur talk to his family when you finish."

The elevator dinged, and we got off into the parking garage. Sheila and I immediately went into 'Bat-mode', Clark and Lois fell back, Lois telling Arthur, "Push the cart, please, while the girls flank. We need to keep an eye out."

He moved to do so, saying, "This is a parking garage!"

"In Gotham," Sheila replied. There was a scream, and she asked, "Clark?"

"Mugging. Be right back." I dropped back to tail position, hand on my wand as he vanished. I heard gunshots, but continued to scan as Arthur pushed the cart, looking nervous.

"Chick, chick, chick," I heard, and spun, blocking the grab, then using a thrust kick to knock her into a concrete pillar, where she collapsed. Two others moved to flank me, and I used tae-kwon-do to take them both out. I moved to rescue the Cortez twins, who were enthusiastically swinging away at their attackers without much luck, but Lois and Sheila had already covered them. I spun and kicked a ragged blonde who was trying and failing to grab Arthur, who was swinging at her in self-defense. I flipped her up to land with the trash, then straightened up, asking, "Everyone ok?"

"Yeah. Who are they, a gang?" Arthur asked, looking at the hundred or so yards we'd traveled from the elevator lobby.

"Death Chix. New gang," Sheila said. "I counted fifteen here, some might be Clark's muggers."

"I'm rusty, I want a proper workout when we get back to the Manor," I complained. "Oh, by the way, welcome to Gotham City, everyone."

------------------------

We somehow managed to cram the six of us, and the luggage into the black van. We turned, and Uncle Clark waved at us as we turned a corner. Climbing on board, he buckled up, turned, and asked in all sincerity, "Isn't this fun?"

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Aunt Sheila took the scenic route as my city gleamed in the early evening, lights sparkling on the Gotham River. The Cortez twins gasped as they saw the Signal against the clouds. All too soon, we were at the Manor, the golden Wayne crest on the iron gates giving me a sense of peace. I was home.

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Arthur was wide-eyed at Dad's collection of cars, all with the 'BW' prefix on the license tags. I sighed in relief as we parked on the end of a row, giving us plenty of room to unpack the van. I saw two foreign cars nearby, a station wagon with New York plates and a scarlet and gray van with Ohio plates. He suddenly clawed at the door, calling "Mom!"

"Arthur!" I could see a group hug forming as the Cortez sisters ran to join their parents. Aunt Lois and Uncle Clark smiled as they watched, while Dick came over to twirl me into a hug, asking, "How ya doin', little sis?"

"Great, you big doofus. Now let me breathe!" giving him a gentle chop to the ribs. Babs approached with Mom, still somewhat fragile, but walking without a cane. I gave them a hug, and asked quietly, "Where's Dad?"

"You saw the Signal?" I nodded, and Mom said, "The new Commissioner's an idiot. He panicked when he heard some of the Rogues weren't in Arkham."

"What happened to the old one? The one that took over from Uncle Jim?"

"In Boss Marone's pocket. There was a big scandal a month ago, his trial's in February. Don't worry about it, Dad just had to chew out the Commissioner, he's on his way in," Mom said. "Let's get this crowd in and settled."

"We've got some luggage carts over here," Dick called, and I sorted out my trunk from the others, lifting it without problems. With some people's expression, I asked, "Jeez. Didn't anyone ELSE put a featherweight charm on their trunk before they left school?"

"Uh... Mattie," Arthur said quietly. "They warned us to keep a low profile before we left. Therefore... no magic. Besides, my little brother and sister don't know I'm a wizard."

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I knocked on the twin's door, and when they opened it, asked, "I'm giving Arthur a quick tour of the Manor. Want to come? There's heavy snow forecast tonight, so you can sleep in tomorrow if you want."

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I had picked up some other relatives for the tour, so I opened the doors, and said, "This is the gym. Women's showers through there, men's through there." I gestured out through a door, and added, "There's an eight kilometer heated track around the estate. I haven't had a chance to really work out at school, so if anyone wants to join me tomorrow morning, I'd suggest an extra layer. The gym gets chilly during the winter because of the high windows."

"My brother's going to love this," Arthur said.

"Where is he?"

"Probably with his girlfriend, he's coming with Dad," one of Arthur's sisters said. She extracted a hand, "I don't think we've had a chance to meet. I'm Becky, and this is Carson." She bounced the infant on her hip, and added, "We really appreciate your help with Arthur and all."

I waved this off, saying, "Our pleasure. You didn't have any trouble finding the Manor?"

"No, although when I told some of my co-workers where I was going for Christmas, they had a few raised eyebrows." She slapped her forehead, "Oh, I forgot the camera!"

"I got mine, Becky," Arthur's sister Teela said, taking Carson.

I ruffled the baby's downy hair, turned, and called, "Everyone ready to move on?" My cordless phone rang, and I said, "Excuse me. This is Mattie Wayne."

"Um, yes, this is Bill Morton. Is one of my family there?"

"Yes, Mr. Morton. Just a moment, please." I handed it to Becky, who said, "Hi, Dad!" She listened for a minute, then handed it to Arthur, saying, "They're ready and the little kids are all playing outside, so we're clear here."

"Hi, Dad!" He listened, then said, "Just like Professor Dumbledore's instructions. Each of you has one hand on your bag, the other hand on the portkey, and say my full name." There was a flash, and two people arrived, stumbling slightly on the hardwood floor.

A klaxon went off, and the computer said, "Intruder Alert. Intruder Alert." I ran to the security panel, and typed in my code to reset it. I smiled at them, and said, "Sorry about that. It wasn't designed with portkeys in mind." I extended my hand, saying, "I'm Mattie Wayne. Welcome to Gotham City."

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Thursday, December 24, 1998:
Gotham City, Wayne Manor
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"It's six a.m., and a good, snowy Christmas Eve day to all of you from Gotham's oldies station, WGHO. I'm Shawna Foxx, getting you up, up, up and out of your cozy den on this last chance shopping day! So get your paw off that snooze button and pour yourself a cup of wake-up! I'll be here with you till ten, but now we've got Alex with the early morning traffic report." I yawned, sat up, and stretched, then padded into the bathroom.

I knocked on the Morton boys' door, and called, "Henry? It's Mattie. You said you were interested in a workout this morning?"

"Come in!" I heard, and saw Arthur and Little Bill still in bed, while his brother was doing pushups on the floor. Arthur groaned, and said from under his pillow, "It's too early, and why am I rooming with him?"

"That's what your folks told my parents, and it's six fifteen. I get up at three at school so I can exercise and study in the common room. Come on, we're burning daylight." Henry snickered and stole Arthur's pillow, who lunged for it.

"Three? That explains so much." He took another glance, and added, "Oh, god. She wears Slytherin colors at home, too." Arthur collapsed back on the bed.

"These are white, not silver tights," I observed. "So what if my leotard's green? I'm way out of shape, and I don't have much time to get a decent workout. Henry, you coming?"

"Didn't look like it yesterday," Arthur observed as Henry motioned me out.

"Track or gym first?" I asked as we entered the gym. I called, "Hi, Aunt Sheila! How are you today?"

"In need of a sparring partner," She extended her hand, and said, "Sheila Hawking, godmother to this arrogant little twerp."

"Henry Morton." He shook her hand, then said, "If you two want to spar, I'll just warm up, and then we can hit the track?"

"Sounds like a plan. Give us a shout if you need spotting, all right?" She motioned to me, and said, "Let's see how much you've forgotten."

"Ha!" I tossed my towel over a bar, and bowed to her. "Prepare to get your butt kicked!"

"Age and cunning always beats youth and inexperience!" She returned my bow, and we started to circle, eyeing each other.

------------------------

"Holy Mother..." Henry whispered, and that distracted me long enough to be pinned. I slapped the mat, and Aunt Sheila gave me a hand up. I glared at him, and he raised his hands, saying, "Sorry. Sorry. Jeez, I don't want either one of you mad at me. You two are just..." he shuddered, "frightening, y'know?"

"Naa. I'm out of shape without a proper gym at school," I admitted. I mopped my face, then asked, "Henry, you look in decent shape. Think you can take a little girl like me?"

"I've always enjoyed a challenge," he speculated.

"I'll sweeten it, and let you make the first move," I wheedled.

"There's never a bowl of popcorn around when you need it," Aunt Sheila commented. Henry nodded, and we bowed. He lunged, I jumped and hit him with both feet, using it to spin and flip while he crashed, skidding two or three feet on the mat.

I applauded, while Henry shook his head and got up. "What did you hit me with?" he asked, "A concealed sledgehammer?"

"Just a kick," I said innocently. "Two out of three? You can still have first move."

He looked at me warily, then nodded. Resuming our positions on the mat, we bowed, then circled, watching each other. He feinted, then tried a grab, which I used to pull and gently toss him a few feet away.

Sheila applauded, calling, "That was excellent, Henry! You lasted a good five seconds!"

He groaned, then rolled to all fours, shaking his head. Teela giggled; her sketchpad in hand as she sat on a weight bench. He levered himself up, glowered at his sister, who stuck her tongue out at him. He walked over to Sheila, and said, "I have ... forty bucks that says I can last at least ten seconds against the demonspawn over there."

"Mattie?"

I said, "I'm good for it," as I took my place on the mat. "Glutton for punishment?" I asked as we bowed and started to circle. He smiled, then broke and ran, snatching Teela's sketchpad on the way out the gym's doors.

------------------------

We found Henry in the kitchen, draining a glass of milk. I bowed, and said, "Domo Arigato" to him, adding, "I'll pay you when I get changed."

"Domo what?" he asked, washing the glass and putting it in the rack.

"It's Japanese, means Thank You," Sheila said, pouring some water. "The proper reply is 'Konichiwa', which means 'You're welcome'. You have taught Mattie a lesson, and she's thanking you for it."

"Ah, then 'Konichoo' to you, Mattie. What did I teach you?"

"Expect surprises from even an outclassed opponent," I told him. I grinned, "You know you are just a wee bit outclassed on the tatami mats?"

"It's what I deserve for playing by the wrong set of rules. Even my bruises have bruises," he admitted.

"You need to stretch them out. C'mon, one lap on the track, and then a shower. Did you guys bring swimwear for the hot tub?" Sheila asked. Teela nodded, and Henry shook his head. "We'll find you something."

------------------------

"How long is the track?" he asked, panting a bit. He was hanging tough for a sprinter.

"Eight kilometers," I answered. "Three more to go, and we'll have five miles. At school, I can run around the Quidditch pitch, it's a bit bigger than a football track. Unfortunately, there's no decent gym there."

------------------------

I knocked on the twins' door, and called, "It's eight thirty. You two up yet?"

"Mattie? Come on in," they called. When I entered, I saw one with a towel around her, drying her hair, while the other was dressed. I plopped down in a chair, and they said, "What's the plan for today?"

"Breakfast, first. We've got three sets of mothers trying to outdo each other downstairs." I grinned, and added, "Then later on we thought you might want to go downtown to see the sights, maybe do a little shopping?"

"Ooh, shopping in Gotham? Anything like Manhattan?"

"Don't know, I've only been to Manhattan once," I admitted. "C'mon. There's twenty-three people here, if we wait too long all the food will be gone!"

------------------------

"Ahh. My complements to the chefs," Uncle Doc said. He finished his coffee, then asked, "Can I top off anyone's coffee? Anyone else want anything?" He stood, then motioned Mrs. Morton down, saying, "Since the ladies cooked, it's only fair that we wash up."

Dad and Mr. Cortez rose, and started collecting plates. I finished my milk, and started to stack Becky's dishes on top of mine. She started to get up, and I waved her down, saying, "We've got this. Don't worry about it."

As Elena passed me a dish to put away, she said quietly, "Y'know, when I heard we could spend Christmas in a billionaire's house in Gotham, I thought you would be all, well..."

"Snooty?" I asked. "We haven't been, I hope."

"No, you haven't! You've been really, well, human, y'know? And in Gotham, I thought I'd see all these super-types flying around, especially with the Signal we saw last night..."

I snickered, and looked over at Arthur. "You haven't told her, I guess?"

He glared at me, and said, "I was waiting for the right moment."

"Told me what?"

One of the Cortez sisters said, "Who we saw on the flight over."

"Ooh, Arthur Donald Morton, who did you see?" I caught Uncle Clark's eye, and winked. "Was it... Green Lantern? Wonder Woman?" she guessed.

"Better. Much better," I said. Uncle Clark grinned at me.

"Batman? No, he can't fly," she speculated, and Uncle Clark smirked, and glanced at Dad. "Was it ... Oh, my god, you saw Superman?"

"Bingo," I admitted, and she squealed, "Superman! You saw Superman! Oh my god, oh my god! Do you think we'll see Batman anytime? He's like, here, isn't he? Mattie, do you think we could, like, take a tour? A Bat-tour?"

"Excuse me? A Bat-tour?" I asked flatly.

Uncle Doc said, "Young lady, there are only two ways you see any of the Bat-Clan in this town. You are either IN trouble, or you ARE trouble. Is that understood?"

"But ... this is Gotham! The home of the Bat! I can't go back to boring old Columbus, Ohio and say I never saw the Bat! What about all those places I've heard about, like the ... Flick theater, Robinson Park, and the Iceberg lounge? What about the Joker, and Mr. Freeze?"

"Joker is in Blackgate prison, and you DO NOT want to see him," Dick said. "He once killed everyone with blonde hair on a subway platform during rush hour. If he were out, we would refuse to take you anywhere in this city. As it is, we must ask you to stay with a Gothamite. You don't know this city. We do." He leaned down to look her in the eye, and said, "Do you promise?"

"Elena, please promise. Please?" Arthur said. "You weren't with me yesterday at the airport. You don't know."

"What happened?" Dad asked.

"Death Chix tried to jump us in the parking garage, Dad," I said.

He grunted and scrubbed a pan, and Mr. Morton asked, "Who are the Death Chix?"

"They're a new female gang, high school age, about twenty members," Dick said. "Primary income is drugs and prostitution, but they've lost members to their clients. They're not mean enough to survive in Gotham." He looked at Elena again, and asked, "Promise?" She swallowed and nodded.

------------------------

We spread a pair of city maps out, and discussed where we would go. Tracing it on the map for our guests, we started in Bristol, went south on the Kane Bridge, past Sheldon Park and the Bowery. Elena wanted to see Crime Alley, but she was instantly denied, Dad saying, "It's called that for a reason. A photo isn't worth your life, Elena."

Henry asked, "Elena, do you think I'm tough? I'm a football player, so I can kick butt in a fight?" She nodded, and he said, "I thought so too, until I saw two Gothamites spar this morning." He nodded at me, and added, "In a real fight, I wouldn't last ten seconds with Mattie here, not to mention her Aunt. Elena, this is a tough town, take their advice, please. Don't do anything stupider than you normally do."

She grumbled, and Henry sighed. "Where after that?"

"What about going through the fashion district, and we can stop and have lunch somewhere in the financial district?" Babs suggested.

"Where's the Iceberg?" Elena asked.

"In Otisberg," Mom tapped the map, "Where we are NOT going, young lady. We'll be down here, on the southern end of the island." She glared at Elena, and said, "IF you're good, we'll go up to the observation deck of Wayne tower. You can see the whole island from there. Safely, and that's as far as we'll go toward your 'Bat-tour'."

"From there, up Mortinson Avenue, past Robinson park, through Gotham University, we'll drive by Arkham Asylum, over the Trigate bridge, through Sommerset and back home," Dick suggested as he traced it on a map.

------------------------

"Elena," I called. She stopped, and I told her, "Fair warning, we are not kidding around. I'm going to be sticking to you like graft on a politician. You can't shake me; you can't lose me. This is MY town. If you go to the loo, I'll be waiting outside the stall. Don't give me reason to go IN the stall with you." She swallowed, and I opened the van door for her.

------------------------

I relaxed a bit when we got to the observation deck. The cold wind meant that there was only one other person up there, a burly man in a long overcoat. He sighed, and turned to go, and I called, "Uncle Harvey?"

"Mattie? Mattie Wayne? Let us take a look at you! You've grown so tall since we saw you last! Where have you been?"

"I've been going to school in England, Uncle Harvey. I'd like you to meet some friends of mine. These are my schoolmates, Roshawn and Shaundra Cortez, and Arthur Morton, and his family. Everyone, this is two of my favorite uncles, Harvey Dent."

"We're very pleased to meet you all," Uncle Harvey said, shaking hands.

Elena blinked, and said, "Excuse me, Mr. Dent. Could I get my picture with you?"

"With ol' Apollo Dent, eh? Sure, why not?" I saw Mr. Morton glance at Dad, who nodded. "Bruce! Selina! Come on, you also! Mattie, do you mind?"

"Not at all, Uncle Harvey. Say 'cheese'!"

"CHEESE!"

------------------------

"Happy?" I asked Elena in the car. "You've got a picture of yourself with Two-Face, which has to be a unique souvenir."

"Yeah." She sighed, and added, "You don't have to worry about me any more."

"Good. Robinson Park is on the right, by the way."

------------------------
Friday, December 25, 1998:
Gotham City, Wayne Manor
------------------------

"It's six a.m., and a very merry white Christmas to all of you from Gotham's oldies station, WGHO. I'm Shawna Foxx, getting you up and out of your cozy den! Go on, get downstairs, you know your kids have already opened half their presents! Get down there and pour yourself some liquid wake up, and for those of us poor sods who have to work, I'll be here with you till ten. For now, we've got Alex with the traffic report." I yawned, sat up, and stretched, then padded into the bathroom.

The kitchen radio was playing 'Jingle Bell Rock' as I got a glass of juice, then wandered into the living room. Uncle Clark was staring into the fire, and I asked, "Quiet night?"

"Fortunately so. Your schoolmates are up, Mattie. Shouldn't you be tearing into presents now?"

"I can wait. I hope you like yours, Uncle Clark."

"I'm sure I will." He stood, then gave me a gentle hug, and said, "Let's get some coffee made. I've already fetched the papers in."

------------------------

"Oh, Mattie, thank you! It's a beautiful oak clock!" Aunt Lois turned it around, and read the inscription:

Jas. W. Tickes and Sons,
Clocksmiths since 1758
London

"Not just any clocksmith, a wizarding clocksmith," I corrected. "Look closely, there are extra hands with faces on them. For instance, the one with Uncle Clark's face should be pointing to 'Traveling', and mine is pointing to 'Home'." I grinned, and said, "Anyone can see the time, but only you can see the extra hands. I thought you might want to have it at the Planet, as there's a 'Mortal Danger' position."

"And a watch!" She looked at me, and asked, "Same thing?" I nodded.

------------------------

I knocked on the Morton boy's door, and called, "You guys ready to leave?"

"Mattie? C'mon in. Leave for where?" Henry asked as he opened the door.

"Didn't your folks tell you?" They looked blank, so I explained, "Every year, instead of a big feast here, we go down to St. Andrew's and help Father Tim serve Christmas dinner. If you've got any spare clothes with you, bring them along. I've got extra hats, scarves and gloves from the Quidditch teams at school to give to the homeless."

They looked at each other, and then Henry said, "Sorry, Mattie, we slipped through the cracks. This is the first I've heard of it. What do we wear?"

"Not church stuff," I said, twirling. "See, jeans, boots, semi-nice shirt and jacket. If you're worried about being attacked, don't. The Rogues don't attack the churches; Joker's the last one that did. This is the 'Christmas truce', if you will. There's a brief church service, and then we all eat."

------------------------

We loaded four enormous cooked turkeys, gallons of potatoes, gravy, dressing, cranberries, and all the various fixings in the vans. Uncle Harvey had said they'd meet us there, they promised a Vietnamese dish, Mrs. Morton contributed a Dam Jou Cake with sour cream, chocolate chips and lots of cinnamon. Aunt Lois swore she gained ten pounds by looking at it. Mrs. Cortez contributed a Cuban rum cake that smelled heavenly.

When we got there, a truck from Dad's favorite Italian restaurant was just leaving. He conversed with the maitre'd, and they shook hands while we unloaded. Father Tim came out with a couple helpers; I waved, and called, "Hi, Uncle Eddie!"

"Mattie! You've gotten so much bigger! Let me take a look at you! Harvey tells me you're going to school in England?"

"Yes, a private boarding school. I'd like you to meet a friend of mine, Elena Morton. She's the sister of a classmate of mine. Elena, this is Mr. Edward Nigma."

"Pleased, sir." Uncle Eddie shook her hand, then took something foil-wrapped inside, and she whispered, "Is that who I think it is?"

"It's him," I whispered. "The red and green question marks on his tie sort of give it away. Just be cool about it."

------------------------

"... Our Father, Amen." I crossed myself, then leaned over and whispered, "C'mon. We leave now to help set up downstairs."

I hung up my jacket, washed my hands, and Mrs. Evans pointed us to the dining hall, where she needed help getting the tables set. The grown-ups were getting the steam tables set up, the bigger kids were helping in the kitchen. We heard the organ upstairs, and Mrs. Evans called, "Fifteen minutes!"

------------------------

"More coffee?" I heard, and looked up to see Aunt Harley top off a homeless guy's cup. I grinned, then looked at the four kids. I tutted, and said, "It looks like you need some hats. Here we go, direct from Scotland, the finest wool." I placed a cap from each of the four Hogwarts houses on their heads, and then winked, whispering, "They're magic hats, woven by elves!" I pulled two faculty scarves out, and wrapped the parents up. "I hope you feel warmer already!" I said with a smile, then turned to a fellow in an old navy peacoat. "Gloves, sir?"

------------------------

"Oh, my. That was a truly satisfying Christmas," Aunt Lois said. "Even though I didn't eat much, what I had was plenty."

"Yes, I wonder if we can talk Perry into sponsoring something like that in Metropolis," Uncle Clark mused.

------------------------
Saturday, December 26, 1998:
Gotham City, Wayne Manor
------------------------

"It's six a.m. on Saturday morning at Gotham's hit oldies station, WGHO. I'm Patti King, your hostess with the mostest, here with you till noon. It's the day after Christmas, and we all know what that means - shopping!" Yawning, I hit the snooze button and sat up. Stretching, I shivered then padded into the bathroom.

"Morning," Uncle Clark said. "I picked up the papers, I wanted to see how Lois' article came out." I sipped my juice, and he added, "She emailed one last night. Ah, here we are."

Gotham City - December 25th
Lois Lane - Daily Planet (AP/UPI)

Either Saturday, or Monday, people will gather around the office coffeepot, and swap Christmas stories. I thought I'd share mine with you.

My husband Clark and I were invited to spend the holidays with friends in Gotham. This was special, as our goddaughter was arriving home with friends. She's been attending boarding school in England, and this was a nice way for families to meet from Ohio and New York. Our flights arrived on Wednesday, which gave everyone a day of rest.

Gotham is a unique town. Not as large as New York or Metropolis, the almost two million people have a town with dojos on every block. It's a town where junior high kids are second-degree black belts in multiple disciplines. It's a town where the Nobel laureates at STAR Labs and Gotham University carry sawed-off shotguns to make it to the parking lot. It's a town where the ultra-chic model strutting down the runway has a stiletto in her corset and a 9mm strapped to her thigh under her dress.

Gotham's finest are doing their best, but geography itself is working against them. Gotham is an island, ringed by docks where not only legitimate freight arrives, but drugs, weapons, and other cargo for the Mob, the Yakusa and the Tongs. The gangs and random hoodlums roam the streets like wolves. For this reason, spending for both personal security and police is the highest in North America.

It's a very tough town, but the natives, who have developed a sardonic greeting, 'Welcome to Gotham City', love it. I've been here before, but I was still glad to have the presence of both Clark and two native Gothamites, one my goddaughter, the other my opposite godparent, a local attorney. We hadn't gotten a hundred yards into the airport-parking garage before a local gang attacked us. Clark had left to render aid to someone not as fortunate who was being mugged, while the balance of the gang, fifteen teenagers, thought they'd have easy pickings with us.

They were wrong. My co-godparent (who doesn't want her name used) accounted for nine of them, while my goddaughter accounted for another four. Meanwhile, the other four of us (two New Yorkers, the student from Ohio and myself) struggled to defend ourselves and subdue two. Not particularly outstanding for this particular middle-aged journalist, especially when the Gothamites didn't even break a sweat, but that's honest reporting for you. The gang members were left in the trash, bruised, broken and bleeding, with a derisive comment of 'No talent Goth wanna-bees', and we proceeded to reunite with family.

Given the character of Gotham City, you would think Christmas Day would dawn with an orgy of violence, and you'd be wrong. The 'Christmas Truce' tradition took hold, where we spent the evening at a local church, serving a Christmas feast. It's strange to meet some of Gotham's notorious Rogues, to sit and talk with them, and find out they take cream, no sugar, thanks, in their coffee. The night was surprisingly silent, broken only by church bells and hymns.

What's next? We head back to Metropolis, the Rogues return to whatever they do, the Bat-clan and the police return to fighting crime and corruption wherever they occur.

Life gets back to normal.