Chapter 12

By Crystal

Author's Notes: Notice Kenshin doesn't say sessha or de gozaru anymore. I did it on purpose and he'll resume his rurouni talk in a while =p. Also notice how he doesn't call Toshiko Toshiko-dono. By the way, this chapter about Kenshin's past is very short and summarized, not very well written either.

*Screw the disclaimers ^^;;*

When the three of them settled down in Kenshin's room, he finally began to talk, "Toshiko...I think I should start from my childhood, so you would not ask me anymore questions about why and so I do not need to go back. I was born in a family with an older sister and two parents, back then, when I was still young, my name was Shinta. It was not Kenshin."

"Kenshin was a name my shishou gave me later on in my life. I was named Himura Shinta, my sister was Koshiyo. Then one day, my father died of a disease spreading around town, cholera [right?]. After another week, my mother died along with him. Soon enough, my sister and I were sold to slave traders. Different groups, I never saw her again. After an year, a group of bandits attacked us, and I was protected by three ladies that I met a while ago. Kasumi-san, Akane-san and Sakura-san. Before they were going to finish me off, a powerful swordsman killed them and saved me." He paused for a few seconds before continuing.

"And left me, then I buried everyone, bandits and the slaves and afterwards, I met with the swordsman again. He asked me my name, and when I replied him, he said it didn't fit a swordsman, that's how I got the name Kenshin, Heart of Sword. I then trained with him for years of the kenjutsu Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu. At the age of fifteen, I knew that many people from the Bakumatsu were suffering, I asked my shishou to let me help the people who were suffering, but he wouldn't let me, but I left him to help the people...It was the worst decision I have ever done. That was why I haven't gotten my succession technique until an year ago." He glanced at Soujiro.

"An year later I left the mountain, I murdered someone called Kiyosata Akira. He gave me the first scar." He fingered the scar going down his left cheek vertically. "A few weeks later...That was when I met Tomoe...On the streets of Kyoto when I was killing some ninja that was trying to take me by surprised. When I had finished off the ninja, Tomoe had blood on her umbrella, face, clothes...and she said..."

* * * * *

Kenshin tightened his grip on his sword, 'Should I kill her, or not? I cannot be seen. But, she is innocent.'

"You...remarkably made it rain. Rain of blood." Kenshin dropped his sword and this mysterious woman walked for a few steps before she fell unconscious. With his god speed, he caught her and softly flung her over his shoulders, trying to make her ride as comfortable as possible, even though she was unconscious.

The next day, he had learned that her name was Yukishiro Tomoe. She was the prettiest woman you ever saw, she had everything. Beauty, grace, she was also kind.

One day while he was having a nap over by the window, she had draped her scarf over him, afraid that he might catch a cold, but by doing that, she risked her life. The next second, he woke up and had his sword in front of your throat, nearly killing you. The next second, he smelt your perfume and apologized to her.

Another few weeks later, Tomoe had asked Kenshin to accompany her outside because she had free time and she didn't want to go alone. It was the Gion festival. They were having a pretty serious conversation about Kenshin.

"So you judge people's right to live. But you even leave that to others. You just do as you're told." Tomoe said, visibly irritated, but otherwise emotionless.

"If I know a lot about the other person, I'll have doubts" Kenshin said softly, still tasting the sake. It's been a while since his sake hasn't tasted like blood...Maybe because...of the woman in front of him? Tomoe's eyes widened a bit at the answer and Iizuka suddenly rushed in saying something about being attacked. Tomoe and Kenshin ran until they saw a group of Shinsengumi. Tomoe was not scared but was holding Kenshin from behind, she was not going to abandon him now.

"Run the way we came." Kenshin ordered.

"Don't you know? A sword needs a sheath." Tomoe said.

"What are you saying?" Kenshin was irritated, this woman wouldn't listen to him, and he was about to have a fight! She's crazy!

"How much longer will you continue killing people? I want to see with my own eyes... ...my very own eyes." Tomoe said stubbornly, refusing to run away, trying to stay and get the boy to stop killing. Some of these days, he would regret it. Kenshin ran forward and slashed the person on his left, then the one on the right, in front and then finished the last Shinsengumi by stabbing him straight in the throat. He pulled his sword out and saw another Shinsengumi group and was going to go kill them when he felt Tomoe's grip and saw her shake her head. He was then lead off by Tomoe.

They reached their inn and got their stuff and Kenshin went out first, Tomoe stayed a few seconds inside before coming outside carrying a bucket of water with irises in it. And he caught sight of Katsura. "Katsura-san."

Katsura then ordered Tomoe and Kenshin to move to Otsu as fast as possible as newly weds. He said married couples were not as suspicious, by now, Kenshin has known Tomoe for four months.

They lived together as couples for another two months with Tomoe cooking. They had planted daikons and Kenshin was proud of them. He had even told Tomoe he liked his life right now. Little did they know that they were growing closer to each other each day. That day, Enishi came to visit, and Kenshin had certainly felt the young man's glare on him. He shook it off, thinking it was because he had married Tomoe.

After selling medicine that day while walking home, Tomoe had fallen on the snow and Kenshin had promised to protect her. She was so happy, but shocked. That night at dinner, Kenshin had told her of his childhood while Tomoe had told him about Akira. They had finally told each other their feelings a little later. After making love, Kenshin had promised her once again that he was going to protect her forever, he was also going to protect her happiness. And she had agreed, when she did, she looked so happy.

The next month and a half, everything passed nicely with Kenshin and Tomoe sharing kisses and hugs and selling medicine, sleeping together in the same futon. Kenshin had finally stopped sleeping in his sitting position while carrying his katana. Tomoe had insisted he sleep with her.

Everything was so peaceful. Tomoe thought she could forget her old life and carry on her new one with Kenshin, but she was wrong. That night while Kenshin was sleeping with her, she had gotten a message, she was going to go up to the mountains tomorrow morning. She didn't sleep that night, she stayed up writing in her journal, writing what she knew would be the last entry. Leaving it on the table so Kenshin would read it later, she went outside, but before closing it, she whispered, "Sayonara, second man to love me."

Early in the morning, Kenshin woke up with Tomoe gone and Iizuka came running in, telling Kenshin about who being the traitor. Kenshin walked up the mountain fighting ninjas, but defeating them all. Not without injuries though, he was weak right now. Someone he loved had betrayed him, his wife... At last, when he faced the boss, he was too weak to fight him. He had only enough strength for one last attack. He raised his sword and charged blindly, then slashed down.

'White plum...' He thought, then opened up his eyes and yelled his beloved's name. She had rushed in and held the boss' dagger so it wouldn't hurt him, but he himself had cut her through with his katana. As Tomoe fell on him, he felt warm blood soaking his pants. For the first time in a while, tears came freely from Kenshin's eyes as Tomoe picked up her tanto and completed his cross scar. She then looked up to him with all the love she had for him and with her last breath whispered, "Gomen... na...sai A...na...ta" Then fell into her eternal sleep.

An year later, when the Bakumatsu nearly ended, he left.

* * * * *

"Then ten years later, I wandered here in Tokyo where I met Kaoru-dono. I've been living here for two years." Kenshin said as he looked up at a Toshiko with tears streaming down her face with Soujiro patting her on the back and whispering comforting words.

Toshiko had one question to ask for now, "That still doesn't explain how you know Soujiro."

"I fought him." Kenshin replied.

Toshiko looked at him unbelieving, "No way, he survived the Hitokiri Battousai's fight, and you tell me my sister's husband, survived Tenken no Soujiro?"

Kenshin raised an eyebrow, "I see, Soujiro hasn't told you everything."

Toshiko looked over to Soujiro and he replied, "No I haven't, Himura-san. I thought you would want to tell her the truth yourself. Therefore, I have not said anything about your real identity."

"Real identity?" Toshiko asked curiously and she made herself stop crying for a minute.

"Hitokiri Battousai. That's me." Kenshin gave a weak smile, "I'm the one that fought Soujiro and got him to wander around as a rurouni an year ago. I'm the one that defeated Shishio Makoto."

"That's not possible..." Toshiko didn't want to believe it and looked towards Soujiro, and he nodded, telling her it was the truth. "Not possible...Impossible. This is stupid. Don't joke around guys. It's not funny." But the both of them did not show any emotions, they had both expected her to be like this when she found out. "You murderer." She hissed, tears rolling down her cheeks, her eyes unable to contain so much water.

"Here...read this and you'll understand." He passed her the journal and she took it. "I haven't read anything except the one page that has blood on it."

"It would be so much better if you weren't the Battousai. It would be easier for me to understand. Because I don't understand anything right now. Why the hell did Tomoe have to marry the Battousai? You not only murdered Tomoe, my sister, you murdered your own baby. Bastard." Toshiko was glaring at Kenshin with hatred.

Kenshin was shocked, 'baby?'. "What are you talking about, Toshiko?"

Toshiko stood up and threw him the letter and he caught it, it took him a few minutes to finish the letter, but once he finished, his face was as pale as a ghost. "No...no...no..." He muttered to himself.

"YOU KILLED THEM GOD DAMN IT!" Toshiko yelled, loud enough for Kaoru, Sano, Megumi, Yahiko and Misao to come running in and slide open the shoji. "You bastard. You killed them." Her knees buckled and Soujiro caught her in his arms and she began crying on his chest. Soujiro tried to calm Toshiko down by humming the song she had hummed on the way to Otsu, it had kind of worked, but she was still crying on his chest.

Kenshin was still shocked with the new discovery, 'Tomoe was pregnant.' And what shocked him just as much was the way Soujiro was holding on to Toshiko, the way he was talking to her, humming to her and held her.

Sano couldn't keep his mouth shut, "Oi Kenshin, who the hell did you murder?" And instantly received a glare from Kenshin and shut up immediately.

Kaoru walked up to Kenshin and patted his shoulders, she knew what was going on, "It's all right, Kenshin. You wouldn't have wanted it to happen, right? It was an accident. It was an accident. You didn't know until it was too late, right? And the important thing was, she forgave you."

"Tomoe forgave me, but Toshiko didn't. And I can't forgive myself either." He said disgusted, he was disgusted by his very own existence.

"But you said a while ago that Tomoe forgave you, and you forgave yourself." Kaoru said, slightly confused.

"But now that I know the truth, I can't anymore." He looked up at Kaoru and the other's confused face, "Tomoe...she was pregnant, and I killed her." He stood up and ran out the dojo gates.

Sano did not really look as dumb as he was, neither was Misao, Megumi or Yahiko. But Sano had asked the question, "Kenshin, he killed his own wife?" his questions directed at Soujiro, Kaoru and Toshiko. Kaoru nodded while Soujiro and Toshiko was oblivious to what was going on. "Holy shit."

"That's why, he's always like this. He made Tomoe the vow never to kill again." Kaoru replied.

Soujiro heard that last sentence and he finally understood why Himura-san never killed. It was because he had promised his late wife that he wouldn't kill after the Bakumatsu, and he has kept his promise so far. For twelve years he hasn't killed, it was nearly impossible for a ex-hitokiri not to kill. He was one, and he knew how hard it was not to. No matter the cost, he was going to get Toshiko to forgive Himura-san, if not, Himura-san would not forgive himself, and he didn't want to see Himura-san like that, it just wasn't right.

But for now, all he can do is comfort Toshiko until she is ready to talk. He had noticed Toshiko had fallen asleep while crying and he asked Kaoru-san if there was an extra room. There was only one left, Kaoru had offer him another one if he wanted because she could get Misao to sleep with herself, but he shook his head. He needed time alone with Toshiko if he was to convince her to forgive Himura-san. This was going to be hard, it was more of a pain in the ass than he thought it would be.

He took Tomoe's journal away from his tight grip and laid it on her stomach while he lifted her up and carried her to the room Kaoru showed them.

Sano and Misao, especially Sano had be shocked at Soujiro's reaction with Toshiko. He'd seen how good he was with fighting, but when that girl broke down and cried, he was so helpless. And then he realized something, Seta Soujiro was not at all different from Kenshin. Soujiro hid his emotions behind a smile, so did Kenshin. Both were ex-hitokiris, both swordsman were the most feared hitokiris. Both of them were alert at all times. Kenshin might look relax most of the time, but Sano knew, he was always alert. Soujiro was just the same... The only difference was Soujiro was never shown was love was and he never knew what was right or wrong, as for Kenshin, he knew killing was wrong, but he did it to help the people that were suffering.

Sano sighed, it's been a long day. He might as well go see what Kenshin was up to.

Author's Notes: This might be really bad, but I wanted to update really badly cause I had a good idea what to write, but just a bit tired to write. So might not be too good, but I'm rechecking it tomorrow when I'm a bit better. Posting it for now, but it might be reposted (or not). Depends on my mood. I slept six hours at camp! Ugh... Tired... Anyways, thank you all for reviewing and reading and have a great day! Sorry I couldn't upload last night, fanfiction.net was screwed...again =p Enjoy and review please!

Daikon - White radish
Sayonara - Farewell
Tanto - Tomoe's dagger