Chapter 9: Homecoming
"You send your thieves to me,
Silently stalking me, dragging me into your war.
Would you give me no choice in this?
I know you can't resist trying to re-open a sore."
"Time" – Sarah Mclachlan
Rinoa sat stiff backed, staring out of the train window, wishing for the hundredths time that she could open it and feel the wind whip across her face, to somehow cleanse the dirt and filth and lies that clouded her past. She had never felt so curious about it before. But then again, her life and those of her comrades had never come into question. Now it seemed as if danger seemed to follow her wherever she chose to take breath.
It seemed to Rush that ever since she had left Balamb Garden, her life had seemed to take on a dangerous edge. There were some things she had yet to find out about herself but she had no idea where exactly to start.
She needed to talk to Ellone, for starters. But that girl talks riddles! Rinoa thought with annoyance. But find Ellone she must. Next would definitely be some research on Rinoa Caraway. The name bugged her like an itch that would not fade away no matter how much you scratched it till it bled. And lastly, Squall Leonhart. Rush smiled quietly, one tinged with sorrow and anticipation. At least with this Squall she could get information from her friends right away. If they were willing, that is, Rush thought dispassionately. Every small reaction, gasp and whisper seemed to have its own meaning, a small clue that led to the bigger picture. And Rush seemed to be the centre piece for it.
She ran a hand across her face, letting out a soft sigh. Beside her, the sleepy form of Selphie stirred.
"Rush… what's wrong?" Selphie asked, her voice still masked with sleep. Rinoa looked at her apologetically. "Did I wake you?"
Selphie let out an enormous yawn while stretching her arms above her head. "No," she admitted, "I wasn't that asleep anyway. What's bothering you?" Selphie persisted.
Rush looked down at her hands. Her voice came out a little less than steady. "I think…I really should be asking you the same thing." Fixing her eyes on Selphie and then glancing to the sleeping Zell who was stretched out on the opposite seat in their carriage. Selphie grimaced, this was not what she was expecting, but at the same time she felt it was time for her to tell. Rush knew something was up. She was no fool. Had Rush not proved herself over and over? Yet, some doubts lingered, and she, Quistis and Zell always questioned whether Squalls sudden disappearance had a tie with her sudden appearance.
Quickly, she made up her mind. She lashed out with her newly acquired boots from Galbadia Garden and gave Zell a quick, but effective kick in the shins. Rush could not help but suppress a snort of amusement.
Zell was quick to come to. "What is your problem, Selph?" He demanded, irritated that his first nap in what felt like eons should come to an abrupt halt.
"I want to ask some questions." Rush stated matter-of-factly, but her tone did not quite disguise how desperately she felt she needed these answers. Zell caught the tone immediately, swinging his legs off the sofa and sitting up straight. The blood rush made him cringe and put his head between his knees. Selphie gave a small smile at the sight.
After a few moments, Zell had regained his composure and sat up. "What questions?" But it was Selphie who answered, "It's about Squall."
Edea sat in silence in front of her dressing table, staring at her flawless visage surrounded by a dozen brightly lit bulbs. Her plan had gone awry and the spell she had cast years past had begun to weaken, slowly but surely. Why? The SeeDs she had hired from Balamb had botched their job. And now Galbadia Garden was suspicious of the loyalty of their General and especially his wife. In other words, she was suspect for now. What exactly did that meddling Seifer want? Edea seethed. That girl Rinoa had great talent, better left untapped and unknown to her. If she becomes a threat, it will be a simple task for me to obliterate her. Edea suddenly scowled; an ugly expression that vanquished any beauty that might have been found in her features. But Squall had failed her! That idiot boy, Zell was not dead. None of them were. She would have to rethink her plan carefully now.
After Rinoa's sudden disappearance, her father, the General had begun a sympathetic campaign to search for his missing daughter. Implications of suspected terrorists, assassins, from the three Gardens across the globe were aplenty. Since who else had the means and the skill to perform such flawless kidnapping or murder, except for SeeDs? It was also convenient that SeeDs were governed by rules of confidentiality and privacy for their clients. It all added fuel to Galbadia's hatred for these war breeding schools and the mechanic outcome of their graduates. Rinoa Caraway, once beloved daughter of the General and famed songstress Julia Heartilly was in the end just another closed case. It suited Edea perfectly.
She needed Squall to play a part, yet, she could not hazard a guess to what he would do if her mind control was released. Who would he go to? He could be some use as a spy, an innocent one. But a spy for her nevertheless.
"So, he just disappeared one night?" Rush asked, puzzled with the story itself.
"Yeah," Zell answered, his face serious. "But at that time, I was on my day off visiting Ma Dintch at Balamb Town. And then… the next day there you were, sitting for hours on end at that train station with no idea of who you really were and where you came from or even where you were going. The idea of bringing you back with me seemed… well, kind of appropriate, since in a way, she had no one."
Zell shook his head. "When I came back to Garden with you in tow…" Rush gave a mock shudder. Selphie was perplexed, she hadn't heard this part of it yet.
"What!" Selphie yelped out. "Well, out with it!" Unable to even sit anymore, Selphie bounded over to Zell and gave him an impatient shake. A watery smile hovered at Rush's lips.
"Whoa there Selphie! Gimme a break here for a bit will ya?" Zell said, half-annoyed and half-reluctant to tell the rest. He was spared as Rush continued. "The first person we met was a very livid Quistis. Believe me here when I say 'very livid' is the understatement of the year." Rush sighed, the memories suddenly becoming very vivid, as if they passed before her very eyes. Saw a younger, scared looking girl entering a world unknown to her, following with blinding trust this young boy who had taken her by the wings.
"Are you sure it's OK to just being in anybody?" Rush asked, her eyes wide as they swept across the lavish surroundings. Clean and orderly, not entirely decorative, but expensive looking nonetheless. She only carried what she had with her, the only possessions she knew she had. The clothes on her back and the over–night bag her aunt had given her.
"Sure, there are tones of hopefuls wanting to get in. They have recruitment teams everywhere, but a very select are allowed to enter." Zell stopped short and stared her up and down. Rush grew annoyed, and in a rare gesture of easiness, smacked him hard on the head. "Here, now. What do you think you're doing?"
Zell stopped his scrutiny and chuckled, rubbing the top of his head in mock hurt. "Ouch, Rush. That hurt y'know?"
Rush snickered, "I'm sure it did." She received a wide grin from Zell, who then said, "Ha-ha, very funny. But for your information I don't think you'll have any trouble getting in. Your build is good, you got the height. Seem smart enough. And if you still don't get in as a fighting SeeD, I'm sure you'll be like some fantastic bomb-shell spy, like the one in Bond's 007."
"Huh?" Realization dawned upon her and a laugh escaped Rush's lips. It came very sudden, but felt so good and it wasn't long before Rush figured out that once she had started, she found it very difficult to stop. Zell laughed along with her.
"The calm before the storm apparently," Zell sighed. "Quistis came then, and she was extremely upset about something I could tell, but I wasn't prepared for how hostile she was going to be with Rush."
Rush interrupted, her insulted expression mixed with mirth. It was obvious she had forgiven Quistis for the slight, but still disliked it for what it was. "From her most objective point of view, I was some ding-dong toy Zell bought back from Balamb to occupy his spare time and distress with. And that's a really nice way of putting it. There were more important things at hand, was how she put it."
Zell looked at Rush sympathetically. "She didn't mean it you know. She was upset about…" Selphie and Zell looked at each other.
Rush looked at both of them. "Yes, I do remember. After that nice perfectly aimed insult at me, she pulled you aside and you two had a nice conference, which I was not invited to join."
Zell looked abashed. "Well, it wasn't like that. Quistis had this plan that's all and wanted my help."
Rush's gaze sharpened on him, "What' plan? And what was Quistis upset about? You trailed away back then."
Selphie spoke up. "Squall Leonhart." She stated quietly. Rush snapped her head around. "What is it with him? This Leonhart, Caraway and mad-hatter Seifer."
Selphie have a giggle, "Mad – hatter would be most correct." She swallowed her mirth enough to continue. "Anyway, Squall is… was… our friend. Our childhood friend actually. He went AWOL four years ago. We don't know if he's dead or alive or married with children, except that Squall would never get married or have children," Selphie rambled, "But that's beside the point."
"The point is that the day when Squall was discovered missing, was the day you arrived in Balamb." Selphie said, "And the thing that really made Quistis, and the rest of us upset was that Garden had conveniently ruled him as a dropout."
Selphie gave a strong shake of her head and continued softly. "But we knew Squall. For all his silence and aloofness, he was the best candidate for SeeD there ever was. Even his grades are… well, let's just say that Squall would have graduated at the top of his class, with marks and honors succeeding generations would have found hard to beat."
Beside her Zell had gone very quiet. "And he was like a brother to all of us, as much as he disliked being around anyone. He was admired by many, but we…" He trailed off, suddenly embarrassed.
Rush nodded. "I understand." For her, that much was true but she didn't understand why so much secrecy shrouded it. "And what about Seifer?"
Selphie picked up the tale "Oh, Seifer was like a wild-card thrown in Garden from somewhere, but we knew him from earlier." Selphie frowned, "It's hard to even remember that he came from the same orphanage. Squall was his rival. Take note when I don't say that Seifer was Squall's."
"He disappeared sometime after Squall did. He left with his posse and I say left because a dozen or so cadets watched him turn his back on Garden and leave after failing his first SeeD candidate exam. Nobody's heard from him, but rumor has it he runs a tight-knit community of criminals or smugglers in Deling City. But then again, rumor has it also, that he's just running a spy – network and his criminals are information exhorts. Who's to know the real truth?" Selphie shrugged to emphasize her point.
Rush contemplated what she had just heard. "But why did Garden just write Squall off like that? They must have known that he was an exemplary student."
Zell regarded her gravely, "I think they would have, but there's another authority in Garden besides the headmaster. No one knows who it is. And, I think they decided to search when they found a replacement in you, Rush."
"Me?" Rush asked, her eyes wide with surprise.
"Well, not an exact match, but more like, someone who could fill in his shoes where no one else could. Personality wise, excuse me while I laugh my head off." Zell chuckled, comparing in his head the fiery Rush with the icy Squall. Who knows what could happen if they met. Thinking about it dimmed Zell's mirth. He looked out the train window and saw the outlines of Balamb town, sparkling white in the sun and looking as welcoming as a mother's bosom. He had never felt so relieved to be back.
"Look." Selphie breathed. Rush gave a loud snort, "Of course it would seem ten times more wonderful after our scrapes with death."
Zell elbowed her in the stomach, earning with satisfaction an "Oomph" while Selphie smiled, humming her train song. It was a good homecoming.
"Long lost words whisper slowly to me,
Still can't find what keeps me here.
When all this time I've been so hollow inside.
I know you're still there."
"Haunted" – Evanescence.
It would have been easier, if you had not met her. The voice reverberated in Squall's mind. Imbecile, he thought with a choke of sardonic laughter for using the sorceress's word. For some reason he could not fathom, the present was not a hazy mist. He was aware, his conscious peaked. Where was his slumberland? The picturesque dreamy wonderland where his rational thoughts could not intrude and reality a fantasy? Today was not going to be one of those days, he thought emotionlessly.
The hold she had on him was weakening. But why? She was always so careful to slip him back under the carpet the moment she sensed his mind wandered. It had been going on for so long, that he had no clue as to how to differentiate his consciousness with her illusions. He felt it in the air that surrounded him, that there was something unusual about now. How long has it been? Am I old? Past my age of youth? Am I dismissed from servitude by my sorceress?
He still could not remember how he came to be, or what his name was, but one thing he knew for sure today was going to be a catalyst for change. He could smell it with his honed senses for blood and death. But he was still puzzled. Where had the heavy feeling that hung upon his senses gone? He was glad for it, but… it was familiar, a pain he was used to. I think that I must be losing my mind.
"Of course. I lost it when I met you."
Squall jerked up from his listless sitting position. "Who said that?"
When I met you…
What does this mean? Who?
The darkness overwhelmed him, the inky stuffiness of the air suffocated his mind. He could not, he could not… but he found that he could not keep himself from it.
Ellone! Sis! I need you!
Brown eyes snapped open, and a hand flew across the bed to switch on the lamp. Messy, short hair, the same colour as the eyes framed the face that was flushed with shock.
"After so long… all these years." She panted, her chest heaving with intakes of breath. She leaned back weakly against her cushions. Great, she muttered, she had fallen asleep on the couch again. Her back ached in protest, but it was nothing she felt next to the stinging memory of the bleak voice that reached out to her.
"Four years I have waited. Why did you not call out before?" Ellone searched the depths of her mind, using all the skill and power she had to find the source of the call, but in vain. It had to be there, some shred of memory, some past to go back to… but there was only darkness, the suffocating feel of a void. Her eyes filled, and a lone tear traced its way down her cheek.
"Oh, Squall. Where are you?
A/N: Thanks for all who suddenly reviewed out of the blue! This story is so old, I never thought people even looked anymore. But I always meant to finish it sometime. The reviews did a good job of kick starting me back into action! Thanks! So there it is, enjoy. For those who really wanted some interaction between Squall and Rinoa, the next chapter (I hope) won't disappoint.
