The boisterous noise in the hallway had seeped endlessly from the crack under the door and only got worse as the day had passed. It was the second day that Leah had been stuck at the offices of Jim Henson, and she was so afraid to leave her office that she had slept there the night.

Perhaps afraid was a strong way to put it. She was reluctant to deal with a horde of bouncing Muppets. She was ill-inclined to become involved with a world that had mysteriously transformed into a cross continent circus within the course of a half hour. Deep down she had hoped that if she stayed locked up for long enough, all the insanity would jump back on its boat and sail away, to far distant lands that had nothing to do with her. Perhaps the situation would solve itself and she would not be required to take charge and put the chipped tea cups of reality back at their proper station in the metaphysical china cabinet. Leah had always had to clean up other people's messes—at least since the onset of her humanity—and this was one mess that she desperately wanted no part of.

She found that if she laid low she was generally left alone by the inhabitants of the company. With the door closed, she had managed to get some semblance of sleep, even though the chaos in the building seemed to last to some small degree even in the wee hours of morning.

Needless to say, she didn't get a lot of rest and the chaos did not appear to be leaving anytime soon. Muppets are soooo cute on television, but I swear, if I see another Muppet, I'm going to strangle it.

All the coffee she had the day before hadn't helped much, either. She was feeling the need to urinate. Badly. Despite her best judgment, she hopped out of the desk chair and threw open the door, boldly rushing forth to finally face whatever might lunge at her.

Her doom came in the form of Kermit the Frog, who was meekly standing—and had been standing for some time, it appeared—in front of her office door. Her face collapsed with the weight of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

"Hi, Kermit."

Kermit smiled up at her. "Hi ho, Ms. Leah. I was—uh—just waiting, you know, for whenever you were ready to come out." He chuckled uncomfortably.

"I have to pee," she said bluntly.

"Erm, yes, well, the, uh, bathroom is right around that corner, Ms. Leah." He pointed a fuzzy floppy finger to the right.

"Thank you."

A fish-like Muppet seemed to take interest in her need to make water, and popped out from a conversation with Pepe the Prawn to shout some words of advice to her. "Do a potty dance if you're having trouble holding it!" A hallway full of Muppets watched her with curiosity over her journey before quickly turning to one another to continue their previous conversations.

As Leah ran into the bathroom—which was equally infested with autonomous puppets as the hallway—she tried to wrap her mind around events for the hundredth time. How did this happen? Really, this is just silly. Did Hoggle start all this when he tried to raise his parents from the dead? No way he has that much power. Is Kaleb up to this?

She sighed deeply as she relieved herself of a day's worth of coffee. All the while, she could hear a group of multi-colored lady Muppets talking as they applied makeup in the bathroom mirror. They were exchanging gossip about the Chef's excellent orange upside-down-and-a-half-cake and discussing the rumor that Miss Piggy and Kermit had a 'thing.'

Leah came out of the stall and wedged herself between the women, having to bend low to the sink to reach it. She towered the Muppet women.

"Oh, hello there President Leah," the fuzzy pink woman said. "Nice day, isn't it?"

Leah shook her hands clean and talked to the woman through the mirror. "Um, I haven't been outside lately."

The little Muppet women worked their jaws from side to side and looked at one another in excitement. "Well, you really should, it's a day to sing about!"

And with that, the women all proceeded to break into a merry tune about how blue the sky was, how lovely the singing of the birds, and should we figure out with which letter in the alphabet all these things on this beautiful day begin? Quickly the trio bounced out of the bathroom, leaving Leah all alone.

Leah laughed despite herself then thought better of it. Her smile catapulted into a frown as she gazed into the mirror and made an unsuccessful attempt to fix her unwashed and horribly mussed hair.

"God, I'm not cut out for this."

Back in the office, Kermit was waiting for her in the seat across from her desk.

Leah managed civility even though she was still frustrated with her bafflement over current affairs. "What can I do for you, Kermit?"

"Just a few things to go over with you, Ms. Leah," Kermit replied dutifully as he sank into the large chair. "First, we have a three-headed monster in the front foyer demanding a chance to audition for the role in 'I Was a Monster in Eerie Pennsylvania.' I tried to tell him—erm, themit—that we couldn't use a three headed monster in the film. Now he's causing a ruckus in the reception area."

Leah cocked an eyebrow and rested her head into her hand. "Fascinating. What's he doing?"

"Um, he's telling bad jokes to clients who are waiting for their appointments."

"Doesn't Fonzy do that already?"

"It's Fozzie, ma'am."

"Fozzie," Leah corrected, disinterested.

They stared at each other in silence a moment before Kermit checked it off his list. "Right, you have a point."

He started the next topic with less business in his tone. "Remember the dance marathon the company was going to have this weekend?"

Leah's face showed that she didn't, but she didn't ask him to explain.

"Well, Miss Piggy got the date wrong in her book; she put it down as last weekend. She, uh, started all by herself and is so mad no one came, she hasn't stopped dancing yet. As a sort of... protest, I guess. I thought maybe you could talk to her."

Leah thought about it a moment and asked, "Can't you do it yourself?"

"Well, you know, I would, but… there's... talk floating around the office." Kermit shifted uncomfortably in his chair.

Leah fixed a no nonsense look on the frog. "Just ask her out, Kermit."

Her bluntness flustered him to the highest degree. "Um, excuse me, Ma'am?" His voice squeaked out uncomfortably.

"You heard me. Next order of business." Leah was starting to get a kick out of her new stint of bossiness. It was certainly a skill that came to her naturally.

"Okay, let's see." Still disconcerted by Leah's last statement, it took Kermit a moment to shuffle through his papers and find his next issue. "Ah, yes, there is a company meeting scheduled for this afternoon at three, and there was a gentleman by the name of Damion who is waiting for you downstairs. And don't forget your lunch meeting with the children's programming division today"

Leah was bombarded. "Wait, wait, back up! Damion?"

"Yes, Ma'am."

"I'll be damned."

"Oh no, don't do that. Alice Cooper might give your soul to the Devil… I mean, Miss Piggy almost went that route, and—"

"Send Damion up, Kermit. And, for the record, I don't think I'll be attending those meetings." Leah stood up excitedly. If Damion was here, maybe she could finally get somewhere with current affairs.

"Okay, Ms. Leah, but it would be best that you attended the three o'clock meeting. I mean, we scheduled this last week, and the company really needs to meet their new President."

Leah gave him a sidelong glance. "Scheduled last week? I didn't know I was going to be here last week. Don't tell me you did?"

"Hmm, I don't know. Last week is a blur. Anyhow, haven't you always worked here? It was human resources, right?" Kermit didn't give her a chance to answer; he started out the door and added, "I'll send Mr. Damion up here right away. He seems like such a nice fella."

Within a few minutes, Damion was bustling through the door, a ball of nervous energy and feathers. He was being harassed by a bunch of short, ragged-toothed Muppets who were jumping an incredible height and snapping at his paperwork.

"Get off me, you little rascals! You are dreadful!" He tried to shoo them away with his long ostrich legs, to no avail. "Stop it, you incorrigible beasts!"

Finally he gave up and stomped at them, squawking loudly. They scuttled away at breakneck speed. He turned and entered Leah's office.

"Ms. Leah!" he exclaimed in excitement, half over having found a familiar face, half over having finally rid himself of the furball pests. "Oh, it is really good to see you." He waddled forward and added, "That Kermit seems like such an upstanding fellow."

Leah smiled widely as the tall birdman entered the room, his arms full of unopened envelopes. "Damion! I'm so glad you found me. What's all that you're holding?"

A couple of envelopes peeked out and fell on the floor. He started to reach down to pick them up. "Um, I got a little lost in the mailroom. They thought I worked there, and I couldn't convince anyone otherwise."

"Just put it all down in that chair, there, Damion." He sputtered a bit, and more bits of mail kept popping out and landing on the floor, putting him in a tizzy. Leah simply walked to the other side of the desk and took the mail from him and placed it in the leather-covered seat.

"Th-thank you, Ms. Leah."

"You're welcome." She gently sat him down in the other chair before sitting down again herself. "They assumed I was the President of the company." She motioned to her big office. "Things are getting pretty funny around here."

Damion looked indignant, as if that one word could not possibly sum up the state of affairs. "Funny?"

Fozzie heard the shout and stuck his head in the door as he passed. "Funny looking!" He laughed at himself as he continued in his previous journey.

Leah gave him an 'Oh boy, aren't you hilarious,' look before turning her gaze back to Damion. "We have to figure out what's going on Damion."

"I have a theory, Ms. Leah." Damion said in his usual fidgety way.

"Please share."

"I think that Kaleb has complete control of the amethyst. It's the only explanation that makes sense. The power is strong enough to merge Above and Underground. That's the only way we could be here."

Leah nodded in understanding. "But why would he do something like that?"

Damion straightened his glasses on his beak thoughtfully. "More power. With the force of two worlds at your disposal… Well, what would stop you?" He shivered noticeably at the thought.

"You're probably right, Damion. It seems like we're dealing with a great deal of dark power here." She leaned in closer. "While I'm not one to wish that our friends the Muppets didn't have free reign, this just isn't right. I got a bad feeling. I had nightmares all night. I can't shake it."

"Me too, Mistress Leah," Damion answered excitedly, as if overwhelmed with joy at having a partner with whom to share his feelings. "There's a sense… of foreboding." He leaned in close to emphasize the statement.

He squawked like a chicken, feathers flying when a voice said behind him, "Oh, please, there's no need for so much melodrama."

He turned around to see a slug-like little man with big bushy eyebrows who was sitting in a sort of floating throne.

"Can I please meet with the President, now? I have been waiting in the reception area for a quarter of an arn." He looked at the two of them with haughty disdain becoming of a king. "I have matters of great importance to discuss with Her Eminence."

He gave Leah a diplomatic nod as if she were his only equal in the building. Leah was having none of it. "Excuse me, who let you in here?"

Kermit stuck a shy head around the corner. "Erm, I couldn't stop him, Ms. Leah."

Leah raised her brow at this new visitor. "What can I do for you…"

"Rygel the Sixteenth, Dominar to the Hynerian Empire."

"Right, Rygel. What's your business?"

Having sensed the tenuous acceptance of his presence in the room, he got straight to the point. "The food in the cafeteria is substandard, and I know an excellent cook we could bring in to improve it."

Just as he finished his statement, the Swedish Chef came barging into the room, flailing a wooden spoon all about and muttering nonsense.

Rygel pointed an accusing, stumpy finger at the fuzzy little man. "It is all his fault! He has suddenly turned vegetarian, and refuses to cook anything worth eating! Pasta without meatballs? Simply preposterous!" The Dominar wiped a bit of spaghetti from his lips, then belched loudly.

"Seems like you're enjoying it just fine," Leah commented dryly.

"Whether I ate it or not is of no consequence, I decline to starve myself because you refuse to hire anything but B-grade chefs!"

The Chef began 'hurdy-gurdying' all over the place, which put the Dominar into a high level of upset. In his nervousness, the creature suddenly felt compelled to break wind.

"Dominar, I don't see—" Leah stopped mid-sentence as she realized she was talking at a high pitch that could only be caused by the release of helium into the air.

If the frog-like man could have blushed, he would have. "Excuse me," his voice squeaked out at a tinny pitch.

"You fart helium!" Leah declared, astounded. The statement sounded even more preposterous in her current chipmunk voice.

Everyone looked at Rygel with complete amazement before Leah finally spoke up. "Okay, that's it, everyone out of my office!"

She shooed everyone out, heading for the door herself. She turned back to Damion and spoke, the short effects of the helium having completely dissipated from her voice (to her relief.)

"You stay here. I'm going to see if I can find a human with any sense in their head in this place. Maybe they can help me put all this… craziness... into perspective."