Chapter 3: It Only Gets Weirder From Here

"Hey you, girl," Vladimir calls out to Joanna, "you've seen Shrubs?" He had a rather sexy accent.

"Ahh psst, duuah," was all Joanna manage to blurt out while pointing at the piano. Vladimir rolled his eyes, really wanting to call Joanna a blond, if he wasn't one himself.

I'm a sexy blonde, Vladimir thought to himself. He smiled, that always cheered him up.

"What's your name girl?"

Joanna propped herself up, trying to look relatively normal. This is it act sexy!

"Oh me?" She circles around him sedately, "well all my friends call me Jo."

"Well, Jo, do me a favor," he hands Joanna three obese manila folders, "sort all my music in alphabetical order AND place then according to genre."

Joanna held the folders as if they were holy.

"Americans…" Vladimir chuckled under his breath as he walked away.

Joanna now more love struck than ever, gave out heavy, smitten sigh. She was too busy day dreaming that she didn't notice a short, swift as lightning figure dashing right at her.

"GET DOWN ON THE FLOOR!"

Like a wimpy, steroidless football player, Joanna flew across the spit covered band room floor. After she fumbled and rolled like a run away taco, Joanna landed on her hinny.

"Gee whiz! What are you trying to do? Give me a concussion?" Joanna blurted while trying to catch the tempest of music that aroused.

"I… I… I'm so sorry I guess I don't know my own strength."

Joanna eyed Kinki jokingly. No one could stay more than 5 seconds mad at her. It was relatively impossible. Kinki wasn't your stereotypical kind of person. She was short and skinny, maybe three fourths of Joanna. Yet, she was the toughest one, like a sergeant, it was impossible to fight her, she'd murder you, bring you back to life and murder you again. The worst part was that you'd forgive her.

Second period bell rings.

"Hmm, we're late. It must be something very important. You never skip." Joanna gets up and brushes the hallucinated spit of her plaid jeans, she looks at Kinki rather skeptically, "well, what is it?"

"Oh, Karla wants to hold a meeting," she replies matter-of-factly.

"Now?"

"Yea, c'mon lets stay in the practice room and wait for them." Without waiting for a reply, Kinki grabbed Jo's shirt and dragged her to the mid practice room.

After what it seemed hours, Karla and Stella arrive.

"C'mon let's go get a couple of chairs," Without hesitation, Kinki kicks the practice room door wide open.

"STELLA, GO GET A COUPLE OF CHAIRS." Kinki screams a rather softly, in her kinky way. By now, Joanna is wondering why Mr. Horner or Mr. Carson hadn't come to give them a referral.

"I drugged them," Karla said as if reading Jo's mind.

"Hey, homies mind lending me some skin?" Stella violently kicks the chairs. They fling at Kinki.

"Watch it punk!"

After the girls settled down and the chaos diminished, Karla takes out her famed Barbie cards. They weren't just any ordinary Barbie cards; they were a mixture of different Barbie edition cards Karla found at EBay, all condensed into one deck. The girls all circled the facing chairs, which were formed into a table. Alas, Karla started her card reading.

"Oh I see. Hmm, very interesting." Karla studied the first of the four facedown cards she placed, one beside the other. It was the Barbie 30s Aviator.

"The answer… it lies in the skies." Karla flipped the second card. It was the Ken and Teresa Special Edition card.

"A betrayal of love?" she asked profoundly, mainly to herself. The third card was turned over.

"The Barbie Boardwalk Mansion card…signifying home, or large place."

At last the fourth card, the Barbie Mechanic card.

"The mechanic signifies craziness and murder."

"It's Screwy C! Obviously." Joanna interrupted Karla's thoughts, "Screwy C has to do something with this murder."

"Yea pimps but what about the playa lovers?" Stella holds up the Teresa and Ken card.

"I don't know, but the mansion probably symbolizes Enoob," Karla says, carefully hovering her hand over the cards, "but I think Joanna might be right. There is rumor that Screwy C's done time at the nut house. The only way to know for sure if she has something to do this is to investigate her."

"Let's beat the truth out of her," Kinki added charismatically. The others gave her the you-do-that look.

The second period bell interrupts their thoughts. The girls fumble inside the practice room chaotically. Before they can make a dash out of the band room, something bizarre happens.

"Uh, guys the door is stuck!"

"Check the other door!"

"No! That one's stuck too!"

They hear a loud booming crash from the uniform room. The lights go out.

End Chapter 3