(L-Space) (In front of you is Mr. Towel who is typing the story on an old keyboard)
I do not own yugioh, southpark, or Garth Merengi's darkplace, or Invader Zim
Oh and {} now signifies thought as kept cutting out the hash's.
I'm Edd, A.K.A Mr. Towel, author, genius, dream weaver, plus actor.
You are about to enter the world of my imagination;
You are about to enter: My 'Stoner's realm'
(Pulls paper off typewriter and throws it behind him, the screen follows the paper as it falls down to the deck of a boat.)
Cue the theme music
(Intro scenes)
(Explosions!)
(Duels)
(Yami jumping from an exploding ambulance with a baby in his arms)
(Yugi and Yami reaching for each other)
(Kaiba smoking cannabis and laughing)
(Big Explosion)
YUGIOH,
ENTER THE STONER'S REALM
(Boat 30: Speedboat dock)
"My Goblin attack force is useless this turn so I'll summon another."
2100
The goblins charged out of the new card as it flickered to life;
"Now I'll activate my field magic card meadow of heavenly escape any card that gets sent to the graveyard, even used magic cards are now removed from play."
Above them the clouds turned white again and created a spiral, through the centre of which shone a beam of light, illuminating the purple clouds of the fake shadow realm below.
"Now Attack Mournful Bob!!"
The goblins swarmed the crying knights and cut its head off, the headless knight flew up the shaft of light into the swirling white clouds above. Vengeful Bob's sword grew as his muscles rippled across his chest under the armour which also grew to encompass his new size, and the flames around Tanto grew.
Miswim cried out as the box she was in suddenly jerked and was lowered by a winch, the chain paying out from the ceiling as the box swung around, she took terrified gulps of air and found the marijuana smoke entering her lungs. Then just as suddenly as it had started, the winch stopped and the box was left swimming above the water, Miswim glanced across to a display box on the wall:
Miswim: 7000
Tanto : 8000
"I thought you were stronger than this Miswim, don't tell me that you have learnt nothing from your teacher?"
Miswim remembered;
(Flashback)
Back at the Shibousha Shourei inn, a regular had often played duel monsters against the other clientele for drinks, Miswim became impressed with the skill he demonstrated, time after time, winning against unfathomable odds, and adopted his gothic lifestyle as her own.
The week before the duellist kingdom tournament began; Miswim waited for him in the bar and persuaded him to teach her all he knew about duel monsters. In order to get her cards, as she was given no allowance by her parents, and because her father hated the game, Miswim had to steal money from the till and give it to the man who had promised to become her teacher.
After weeks of hard work, her sensei entered her into the battle city tournament in which she lost to Mai's sneaky fortune telling trick, ruining her self esteem, and when she arrived home, the man never visited the pub again.
All she has left to remember him buy are the cards he gave her before her first tournament; her destiny board cards and her 'Bob' warriors, he never even told her his name.
(Present: Boat 30: speedboat dock.)
Miswim felt anger building up in her, with her lips almost sealed shut she whispered through her microphone in her eyepiece:
"How did you know about sensei?"
Tanto smirked.
"How long have you been manipulating my life?"
Tanto's smile relaxed.
"We have not been manipulating anything. We just have a lot of background information on you."
"Is Sensei here? On one of these boats?"
"No, your 'sensei' eluded our grasp, it was meant for him to duel you, but he would not be found, he disappeared when this tournament was being planned."
"So you meant for me to have to go through this?"
Miswim was seething with anger, only the plastic cage protected Tanto from her wrath, his smile fell off his face, which moulded into a shape of wistful regret.
"I never meant any of this, but in order to defeat the sadists that control this tournament, we must infiltrate them at every level, do not worry, you have friends here."
At this Miswim's heart fluttered, they won't let me die!
"So what you're saying is that you are going to let me win?"
Tanto's face hardened again.
"No, I can not let you win, cameras are watching my hand, and besides if you do not beat me then there is nothing we can do without giving away our position."
Miswim stood up from where she had fallen to her feet.
"Fine."
She whipped a card from her deck into her hand and looked at them.
"You have let my Vengeful Bob get very powerful, and for that I thank you."
"What are you talking about? Reflect and refrain prevents him from attacking for another 2 turns."
"True, but I activate mystical space typhoon to destroy your trap!"
A small typhoon swept up the goblins into Tanto's graveyard.
"And then I sacrifice my Friendly Bob to summon Summoned skull!"
Friendly Bob collapsed into shards as a card appeared, out of which climbed a cloaked skeleton, Vengeful Bob's armour burst off him, and underneath was steel-like skin, covered with bulging muscles, he swung his sword around his head and shouted at Tanto, whose flaming deck master grew.
2500
"That's an impressive monster."
"Why thank you, now I use Raigeki to cleanse your field of monsters."
A lightning bolt thundered down onto each goblin attack force, the fire around Tanto grew again with each death.
"Now Vengeful Bob!!! ATTACK!!!!!!"
Vengeful Bob charged forward and slammed his sword through Tanto's chest, but as Bob was a hologram. Tanto inhaled a lot of smoke from his duel disc while his life points dropped for a second or to he staggered and almost fell over backwards, getting saved at the last minute by a weak scaly fiend reaching out of the fire around him to catch him before he hit the floor. The creature turned around looked at vengeful Bob, glared and pointed his finger.
Vengeful Bob exploded into thousands of shards which were sucked into the fires around tanto's feet.
The flames grew bigger.
5450
Miswim stared at Tanto dumbstruck;
"What? My monster attacked you directly, how did he die and what?......."
Miswim sighed.
"Deck master, right?"
"Yep."
His deck master pushed him to his feet.
"Any monster that attacks me directly gets removed from play after the attack and I only lose half of his attack points from my life points, rather than the full amount."
He took a breath and looked Miswim in the face.
"So if you want to attack with summoned skull...."
Well at least we didn't summon Anubis Noir to attack with.
"I'll place one card face down thank you."
Tanto drew, just what he needed to finish the game.
Fuck, Miswim can't defeat this, oh well, she played a good duel.
"Miswim, you have been a worthy adversary, but you can not defeat my next combo, first I summon one monster face down, then I lay down two cards on the field."
His hand was empty.
"Your move Miswim, do what you will, you can not defeat me!"
"Scary move, ok, I activate Harpies feather duster."
A large feathery wing swept along Tanto's magic card field, but as soon as it touched the first face down card another wing flew from it and knocked the feather duster onto Miswim's field destroying all her magic cards.
"Gryphon Wing."
"Grrr."
Miswim growled under her breath.
"Fine, I'll summon Queens double and attack your life points directly."
As the double of the queen attacked Tanto it too exploded and got sucked into the flames around him.
5275
"Well lovely last ditch attempt, while your pitiful monster attacked me I activated the trap card last orders, forcing us to construct a new deck of 3 cards from any cards we have in our deck or the graveyard, and the rest, thanks to my field magic card, are removed from play."
As Miswim sorted through her cards for the 3 she thought she'd need, a thought crossed into her mind.
He probably has a well defined strategy, all these cards going out of play is worrying me a bit, and my deck is to small to use my..... wait... I have it.
Miswim took 3 cards from her deck and put the rest back in her deck box, Tanto did the same. The flames around him obscured his body and most of his face, apart from one eye and a patch of skin round it.
This has to work, I feel it.
Then another thought ran through her head and she gulped.
If it doesn't... You're dead.
"Ok, Tanto, you're going down, I only need 3 cards to wipe you out, and look, there they are in my deck. Your turn, good luck."
Tanto stared across at Miswim, she was acting brave but he could see her shaking,
Well at least they're giving me a lot of money for this.
Tanto drew his first card.
"First of all I activate Raigeki."
Miswims monsters were destroyed by blasts of lightning.
And the cause will be furthered, remember the cause.
"Miswim, I am deeply sorry, for you are about to lose the duel. For I summon my deck master Gren Maju De Enza to the field."
The flames followed a path into the centre of the space between Miswim and Tanto.
You were right.
"Please forgive me Miswim, my monster gains 400 attack points for each monster removed from play, and since our decks have both been removed his attack power is...."
But Miswim was ahead of him as she stared into the beauty of the flames.
"Over 40000."
Well.... At least he's sorry.
"That's right. Now my monster, attack Miswim directly."
Tanto turned away unable to watch.
Out of the flames burst an enormous fiery red dragon, the scaly fiend had grown with the power it absorbed, and now it was unstoppable. It flew into the air, circled and dived towards Miswim hanging in her box, it opened its mouth. Miswim could see brightly coloured gasses coming out of various glands in the dragon's mouth, everything seemed to slow down. As the red gas connected with the mustard yellow gas the air sparked, the green and the blue gasses seemed to lazily drift into the spark and catch fire, the gasses forming a massive ball of flame that inched its way out of the dragons mouth towards her.
(l-space)
What willl happen next, if you want Miswim to die a horrible death put the number '1' at the top of your review.
If you wish for Yugi to save her press '2'
If you wish for Ryou to save her press '3'
If you wish for Behkurah to save her press '4'
If you wish for Kaiba to save her press '5'
If you wish for Mokuba to save her press '6'
If you wish for Marik to save her press '7'
If you wish for Joey to save her press '8'
Or if you want Yami to save her while controlling Edd's body press 9
Remember, the next chapter goes out tomorrow, so make your choices now.
Disappears in a puff of smoke
(there is blackness all around you, except for......
A bright blue button marked review looms out of the foreground, you feel an irresistible urge to click it.)
