Harry Potter And The Strip Dancing Llamas- Chappie 3
VB: Wow, 8 reviews. Let's hope for more this time around, ey, guys?...where's Gina?
Courtney: She's getting Antonio for chapter..uh...what was it? Five?
Sara- Yeah, that one. The guest writer has to come back! Duh!
VB: ' Oh well. REVIEW!
Two Months Later...
Hermione got a letter in the mail from the Ministry, telling her of how Harry had died in a tragic goose accident. Seems he was riding a roller coaster at a random theme park and was hit in the nose, being killed instantly. "Ohemgee!" yelled Hermione when she got word of Harry's horrible accident. "Oh well!" she exclaimed, grabbing Ron by the arm. "Come here, you hunk of...hunk!"
Ron broke down and sobbed for a second, then launched himself onto Hermione. Just then, Harry stumbled into the room. "Harry! You're...alive..." Both Ron and Hermione said, trailing off depressedly. "But..we were going to have...mechanical children!" said Ron. Harry's eyes filled up with tears at he screamed at Hermione, hyperventilating. "I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!" Just them Snap sprang in and couldn't believe his eyes. Ron was on Hermione's leg...tisk tisk.
Snap's eyes widened. "Hermione! I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!" Snap cried, thinking he was bringing up the original line. A random character popped in, named Michael, and yelled at Hermione as well. "I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!" Hermione kicked him in the 'wand and two cauldrons', aptly nicknamed by Ron, after he spoke, and Michael dissapeared. "Uh..I thought what we had was special..?" Ron said to noone in particular, so they all kicked him.
"Well, Hermione, it looks like you have to choose your mate." Harry said, praying it wasn't him. He really couldn't be married so soon. I mean, c'mon, he's the hero! Duh!
"This sucks!" said Ron. "Everyone knows Hermione is going to pick Harry because he's the main character! He ALWAYS gets the last piece of olive loaf! Ha! Now I ruined the ending for you!" shouted Ron.
"I choose..Snap!" yelled Hermione. Snap, looking very suprised, ran over to Harry and Ron. "HAH! No more main characters! MUAHAHAHAHA!" Harry rejoiced as Snap and Hermione embraced lovingly and soon went off to Snap's office/bedroom place. Harry and Ron looked dumbfounded. "I can't BELIEVE she picked HIM." said Harry, very egotistically. "I can't BELIEVE it's not BUTTER!" said Ron incredulously.
"Oh my God! I know, right! When I first toasted it I thought it was too good to be true!" said Michael, randomly appearing out of nowhere-literally. "Lunarious!" said Ron. "Zetus lapetus, Ron! Let's run away and get married!" cried Michael.
"Umm, I have an idea!" Ron said sarcastically, beaming. "How about, NO!" Michael began to weep and ran out of sight back into nowhere. "Stellar!" yelled Harry. "Super Nova! Zoom zoom zoom!" These strange noises were coming from Hermione and Snap's room.
Harry and Ron stared in the direction of Snap's bedroom, since they were nowhere near it.
"Hi, I'm Joel!" said a Random person. "So, going ALL THE WAY to L.A.?"
"Actually, no, but Hermione and Snap seem to be." said a rather jealous Harry, because he wasn't the center of attention. "Yeah." said Extra #18.
"ERRK! I CAN'T GET IN!" yelled Snap from the other room, while Hermione was making strange 'mmnh' noises.
The four stared again, Harry raising an eyebrow."What the f-"
"-RIDAY!" Ron cut him off. Joel poked him. "Don't say that, I'm dying for a good f-"
"-RIDAY!" Ron ran into Snap's bedroom, God knows how he got in, and flung the door open to see Hermione and Snap..well...you get the idea. No smut for you dirty people you!
"Adult situations not suitable for children!" Ron shouted, then placed little black bars over everything that isn't normally shown on TV. Including Snap's nose. God knows how many children have been frightened by it. Hermione's eyes filled with tears of sadness and horror. "R-Ron, you've become a-"
DUN DUN DUUUUNNNNN...!
"A CENSOR!" she wailed.
"OH MY GOD!" Harry screamed in a high pitched voice. Joel blinked. "Stellar." he said in a dead voice.
"Erm..GOD'S NAME SHOULD NOT BE USED IN VAIN!" yelled Ron, then put a black box over Harry's mouth. Harry tried to say something, but all that came out was a long beeeeeeeeep. Joel ran around the room yelling(in a "sk8er boi" voice.Warning-CHATSPEAK AHEAD!)."He was a sk8er boi! He was a sk8er boi!"
(Note: Chatspeak now over, you can continue reading.)
Hermoine was still crying with censors all over her body. Joel, the only person besides Ron without censors, glanced around for an escape route. "AHA!" Joel took the first chance he got and bolted to the exit, dodging censors in a Matrix move.
The door was closing quickly in a garage door-like-fashion. Joel ran to it, doing a quick Batman roll out the door.
Suddenly Joel's big toe got caught in the crisis and it was chopped off. All that was left of the scene was a toe surrounded by blood in front of the 'garage' door. Hermione finally fainted from fear, shock, and censor. Snap caught her, and glared at Ron in that 'I will set you ablaze right now' look. Ron, doing what anyone else would at the moment, grabbed Harry and ran.
"I think..we're...finally safe.." panted Ron, gasping for breath. Suddenly, a giant phonicalabiniamostronitac thing came out from the closet, conveniently located next to Ron. "Ahhhh!"
"AHH!" screamed Harry also, even though he didn't know what he was scared of because he didn't understand that huge random word. "AHHH!" screamed the phonicalabini-something-or-other. "Ew!" said Ron. "Tic-tac!"
"Is it really that bad?" The monster asked, composing itself to speak in a dignified British accent. Both boys nodded as Ron pulled out his want. "Censorigiganticus!" he shouted, and a black box appeared to cover the monster's entire body. Ron grinned, apparently very proud of himself. "Violence not suited for children." he explained to Harry in a matter-of-fact tone.
Harry stared. "Hey, I'm just trying to keep this story G-rated!" said Ron. "But Ron, this is a PG-13 rated fic." Harry pointed out, pointing at the top of the screen. Ron gasped and put bars on each of the four authors' hands. One of them had three.(-cough-Gina-cough-)
The phonicalabiniamostronitac then ran off into the wilderness, while Ron attempted to fix Joel's toes. "Children, don't try this at home!" yelled Joel. "Thomas James LaMare is here to rescue you!" yelled Tom. "But, the story's almost over. You can go home." replied Ron. Tom started crying.
"It most certainly is NOT!" yelled Harry. "I haven't ended up as a hero yet!"
"Since
when are you the hero!" yelled Joel, who was
conveniently wearing a hero suit with a gold medal.
Harry
gasped. "Oh, the dra-ma!" Tom said, who had conveniently
stopped crying enough to pull out a video camera.
"Don't
go there, girlfriend!" shouted Harry through tears. "Don't..go
there!""Oh, this is priceless," said Tom. "Work
it..work-it." It seemed as though Tom was having the time of his
life.
Joel randomly
starting doing sit-ups because Tom was yelling work it. "I AM
THE HERO IN THIS STORY AND YOU KNOW IT!" yelled Joel, as tears
rolled down his face.(Snap was spotting him.)"NOT IF I CAN HELP
IT!" screamed Harry, who was beet red from anger.
"I
CHALLENGE YOU-TO A..DANCE-OFF!" shouted Joel dramatically, who
was, of course, the best dancer in a town with a funky 'No Dancing'
law.
They all gasped
as one, but Tom only did because he seemed to be getting a liiiittle
too excited.
Harry
walked over to Tom-noticing his 'excitement'. "Is that a wand in
your pocket, Tom, or are you just happy to see me and Joel dance?"
Is Tom aroused? Does he have an excited wand that sticks out? Tune in next week to..HARRY POTTER AND THE STRIPDANCING LLAMAS!
XxXxXx
VB:Well, I think that went rather well.
Courtney-DAAAANCE OOOOOFF!
Sara and Gina-dance around
VB:' Well, updates are going to hopefully become quicker, now that me and Sara have a class together, besides me and Courtney having a few. Oh well, bye!
All: AND REMEMBER TO REVIEW!
VB:Please! That's how I pay my psychiatrist!
