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x-x

Before

Trip wandered into the mess, still wearing the sweats he'd been trying to sleep in, his wrinkled shirt left casually untucked as he padded into the room. Noticing that the space was empty, he started humming to himself as he got a mug of cocoa and stood over the desserts tray, evaluating his options. Smiling, he grabbed a brownie, sans nuts, and strode towards the window.

Rounding the couch, he saw Malcolm slumped down, almost invisible he was sunk so low into the seat. Trip glanced at the padd next to his friend; the test results from earlier? He cleared his throat.

Malcolm jumped a mile.

"Sorry, kid," Trip said, sliding into the seat beside Malcolm. "Thinking about the exam results?"

Malcolm grimaced. "Can't sleep."

"Neither can I," Trip said as he tucked into his brownie. "Want some?" he asked, turning to Malcolm, catching his friend's eye as he said, "You know, it doesn't go in your file. It's meaningless."

Malcolm didn't look convinced as he reached to take a small piece of brownie.

Trip took a sip of his drink. "What did you get, anyway?"

Malcolm, chewing, now looked puzzled.

"On the test, what was your grade?" Trip said slowly, enunciating each word.

After a hesitation, Malcolm finally replied, "I don't really want to tell you." He blushed slightly.

Trip looked at Malcolm in surprise. 'Okay, fine," he said, finishing off his brownie, deciding to let the topic go, save his friend the embarrassment. He yawned. "It's late, and I have an early shift. I'll see you…"

"A-," Malcolm said softly, interrupting.

"Excuse me?"

"I got an A-."

"That's great, Malcolm," Trip said cautiously. He wrapped his hands around his cup and leaned towards his friend, confused. "So, what's wrong?"

"It wasn't the grade, so much. It was what I got wrong." Malcolm paused. "Cryptography."

Trip nodded.

Malcolm sat straighter, then leaned forward. "I'm supposed to know it. It's part of my job as a tactical officer."

"But Hoshi…"

"I know, it's part of her speciality, but still, I should know it," he said with disappointment, shaking his head. "I used to know it. I…" His voice trailed away, and he sighed, staring out at the stars. "I'm afraid that I haven't been keeping up with the latest advances." He looked to Trip, blushing, his hands folded tightly together. "I just haven't time to read all the journals. I mean, I…"

Trip interrupted him. "None of us have time to keep up with everything, Malcolm. You kind of have your hands full, here." He smiled. "It's part of being the boss. You have to know what to focus on, what you have to do yourself, and what you can rely on others for." He took a sip of his drink, thinking. "And some things, things you can't control, you may just have to let go."

Malcolm shook his head, and was just opening his mouth to respond when the alarms went off.

x-x

Now

Trip sat up, his back stiff from the cold, hard ground beneath him. The sun was rising, and their guards would be signalling them awake soon.

He sat curled in around his knees, his legs bent and his arms around them for warmth in the chill morning as he watched his breath coiling out in a fog. He watched as Malcolm slept, his features slowly revealed by the rising sun; his face pale, but with a flush of pink on his cheeks. His friend was lying on his side, his head pillowed by one arm, the other curled up in front of him.

Trip scooted over to Malcolm, placing a hand on his shoulder, feeling the steady rise and fall of his breathing as he slept. Trip could feel the heat coming off of his body from the fever, and worried. Malcolm had an infection, probably, or worse, but there was nothing that he could do here. They had no medicine, no bandages, not even any blankets; nothing but the clothes on their backs.

Malcolm winced, caught in the midst of a dream, and Trip rubbed his shoulder lightly, whispering, "Shh..."