Disclaimer: Sleigh bells ring, but I'm not listening.
Chapter 25- Ghost of Christmas Past
Flurries of snow whooshed by the windows of Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry, causing the view out the many candlelit panes to resemble one in a snow globe- vigorously shaken. Several ghosts watched the snow settle into drifts along the Forbidden Forest with a nostalgic sigh. Once, they would've looked forward to feeling the icy air as they tobogganed down a hill or skated over the frozen surface of the lake. Now, fond memories were all they had. Inside the Great Hall, the half a dozen children who remained over the holidays were sitting across the table from Hagrid, Lorelei, and Tonks. The professors and students were engaged in a lively debate over who had received the worst Christmas present ever.
Pretending to listen to Professor McGonagall and Sprout debate the best way to prepare plum pudding, Severus ate dinner perfunctorily while his thoughts turned inward. The school was blessedly quiet since the Hogwarts Express had taken away almost all the plague of children, but peace of mind, unlike peaceful surroundings, was hard to find. On the surface, everything was fine- more than fine. He had time to pursue his potions research, and the other 'research' he performed for the Order had tapered off as ironically even Death Eaters had holiday plans.
His relationship with Lorelei was beyond satisfying. She was as excellent a companion as she was a lover, and the days and nights spent working together, reading, or spending time together were almost too good to be true. The feeling that something was bound to go wrong because everything seemed so right was one that Snape had felt before. All his life...and things always had gone wrong...which was the reason why he was so perturbed now.
Three mornings ago, the OWL post had come, and a tawny owl with large dark eyes had dropped a slim package in front of Lorelei. The woman had taken one look at the writing on the brown wrapper and paled before acting as though it were just another piece of mail. Curiosity engaged, Severus had followed the siren back to her quarters, and observed her tuck a slim book into the bedside table drawer while the brown paper it had been wrapped in burned in her fireplace. His partner had stiffened before relaxing and telling him she'd received a letter from her mother. Snape didn't need Legilimency to know that she was telling the truth while omitting what else her mother had sent.
He had waited for her to confide in him- he was still waiting. Shadows began to appear under her eyes and her sleep became restless. Lorelei's passion seemed almost desperate, and several times he had awoken to feel her gazing at his face, or standing before the enchanted window, staring off into the darkness.
This afternoon, when his lover had accompanied Hagrid and the children on a snow-shoe walk through the forest, the conflicted man had stood beside her bed, looking down at the side table, burning to open the drawer and read the words responsible for Lorelei's distress- and his. Glancing sideways, he saw an expression of misery cross the face that was so dear to him. Severus resolved that foolish ethics would deter him no longer. After dinner, while the Tonks and Lorelei made something in the kitchen with the children, he was going to read a book.
Around the large work table in the Hogwarts kitchen, the children and professors worked industriously to affix large gingerbread panels together with icing.
"Hagrid, no...Don't lick it...Enchanted Royal Icing looks good, but it tastes horrible- it's just supposed to keep the gingerbread together!" Lorelei cried.
Tonks looked up from where she had just stuck Gryffindor 'tower' onto the gingerbread they were assembling into the castle of Hogwarts. The second year Hufflepuff whose parents were Healers working Goblin refugee camps in Eastern Europe for the school year took a quick taste and grimaced. She smiled at the boy wiping royally awful tasting icing off his tongue and said, "Have to learn the hard way, do you? Me too..." The little blighter's cheeky grin was one the DA professor saw every day- in the mirror.
"Dobby is finished baking another tower, if you is ready for it..."
The gold and silver streaked spikes of the metamorphmagus' hair shook as she nodded and accepted the gingerbread from the house elf. Dobby seemed exceptionally cheery. Perhaps his mate Winky deciding to drink pumpkin juice instead of butterbeer had something to do with it. The other elf was sorting loads of different kinds of candies onto trays for decorating the gingerbread castle after it was assembled. Eyes the color of a Christmas tree narrowed. Winky was wearing a black silk sock that had L embroidered round the top. Lorelei had told her that Dobby had been given that sock by Dumbledore.
Turning her attention to the gingerbread castle, the professor quickly used a small trowel to glop icing and paste another tower onto the creation. She smiled at the thought of Remus coming to spend the weekend. He would be so impressed with her craftiness. A piece of the Hufflepuff tower snapped off under her fingers. Quickly checking to see if anyone had noticed, Tonks slathered on some more icing and carefully glued the piece back on before stepping back and going to help arrange candy. Surely that would be safe from her undomesticated bungling.
"Don't worry, mate, a wand will clean the spill up in no time."
So much for the candy being safe... Shooting daggers at the little snotrags snickering over a grown-up not being able to pour a jar of gumdrops onto a tray without accidentally nudging the platter onto the floor, the woman sighed as the other woman cleared the mess and handed a new tray over to the children. The two professors watched the students and Hagrid use more icing to attach a wide array of candy to the gingerbread castle. Lorelei stifled a yawn. Her friend noticed the action, and the faint shadows under dark eyes. Inclining her head toward the table where the decorating was well in hand, Tonks said, "Why don't you leave the rest to us and pop off to bed?"
"You sure?"
"Oh yeah"
The siren smiled at their little in-joke and tucked a long spiral behind her ear. Red lips curved upwards as she admitted,
"I haven't been sleeping well the last few nights. I think I'll take your advice." Telling everyone she looked forward to seeing the results of their work at breakfast the next day, Lorelei smiled and left the kitchen.
Tonks stared after her friend, trying desperately not to think about why the siren hadn't been sleeping well. She scrunched her eyes together miserably. Staggering against the table, the woman felt her stomach begin to churn. A flask was pressed into her hand.
"Go ahead, take a nip. Ye look like yer could use a dram o' firewhisky, lass."
Nodding her thanks, Tonks took the flask from Hagrid and took a long swallow that had white teeth flashing in amusement against a bushy black beard. The burning sensation traveled down her throat, hit her stomach and gave the acid churning there blessed relief. Or something more corrosive to combat...she wasn't sure, and didn't care. Smiling thankfully at her large friend, Tonks handed back the flask and stood beside him to view the children's handiwork.
Inside Lorelei's quarters, the lean, intense features of the Potions Master's face were set in grim determination as he opened the bedside drawer. Snape knew invading privacy was technically wrong, but he felt the greater good demanded it. Something in this thin leather-bound book was upsetting his lover- which upset him, and therefore must not be allowed to remain unknown, any longer. Striding into the lounge, he sat in his favorite chair and opened the volume. It was a diary. No dates or names were inscribed on the first page. How exceedingly odd... Flipping the page, he scrutinized the handwriting- it looked like that which he'd seen on a tag stating 'For My Favorite Teacher'. He began to read,
I've decided to keep a journal over my summer holiday. I never have before, but one of my loony friends who divine the future tells me the stars say I must. Or maybe the tea leaves said it. Or was it the cards. Whatever, she was quite adamant, and even gave me this blank volume to write in. Smart woman, I never would have got one myself.
I needed a place to recover from the unhappiness of my last position. One of my Aunts recommended Hoy. I'm the only lodger in an older couple's lovely cottage on a hill overlooking the sea. The Northern coast of Scotland has a stark beauty unlike anywhere else I've ever seen. Something about it calls to my soul. The light is amazing here on the island- it never really gets dark at this time of year. The people call it the 'simmer dim'. I've explored the beach into the wee hours and never been afraid. The sun barely sinks below the horizon, and the twilight is magical. I'm looking forward to the Midsummer Bonfire.
Frowning, Severus wondered what about a travel diary could be so upsetting. He flipped a few pages further and read,
Beyond Britannia, where the endless ocean opens, lies Orkney.
Orosius, a fifth century scholar, wrote that, and the people here are quite chuffed with the description. Have been informed down at the pub that the people of the Orkney Islands aren't of Celtic, but Norse descent, and some even speak the ancient variation of the language called Norn. I now know that the children are saying 'good day witch' when they cry 'goanda felkyo' while they run past me in the village, which is very amusing.
I love to listen to the almost musical inflections of the unhurried, deliberate voices that tell tales of the sailors, and the sea people who love this place where the ocean and the North Sea meet. The old man who told tonight's tale stared oddly at me the entire time, as if he were trying to convey something. Or maybe he just hadn't seen an attractive woman in awhile.
Hmmm...the staring...he didn't like that. Snape hoped the gaffer was just a dirty old man, but somehow knew he wasn't.
More pages were leafed through, until a paragraph caught his eye.
The older children asked me to help them gather heather for the bonfire tonight. We gathered armfuls and carried the bundles to where the peat is stacked and waiting to be lit. Wood is much too precious to be 'wasted' in such a way. One girl told me she was going to carry home a partially burned portion of peat, and place in on her door lintel so the next day she could break it open and see what color hair her future husband would have. I gently refused her offer to save me a piece as well.
Another child bragged how he would leap over the flames for good luck. The belief that fire wards against all forms of evil is prevalent here as in so many other cultures. As I waved goodbye, the girl who offered the peat ran after me and tugged my sleeve. She blurted that her mam had the sight, told her that I was a child neither of earth nor sea, and I shouldn't go onto the beach tonight, or...she shook her head and ran off, looking frightened to say more. Now I'm intrigued, and the shore sounds like the perfect place for a midnight walk.
Turning the next page, the man's stomach twisted as he read,
Did I realize that going down to the shore after watching the bonfire light the sky in orange and crimson flames would change my life? Perhaps I should have strolled around the fire 'sunwise' as the children begged me to, but I was so restless, I needed to go on a long walk. The water was icy as I waded through the shallows with bare feet. I stepped on a shell, and the pain was intense. Blood dripped into the water before I could close the wound with a healing spell. Tears of pain, and loneliness rolled down my cheeks. I wiped them off and rinsed my hands in the waves.
I sat upon the sand and watched the sea, wishing I wasn't alone. Lying back upon my shawl, I closed my eyes. Cool lips touched mine. Opening my eyes, I knew that the man who had awakened me with a kiss was no dream. The old man's story had come true.
Selkies are empathic creatures drawn by tears and blood. My unhappiness had sent a psychic call into the sea and Tynan had answered it. We talked of our lives in the Midsummer Twilight. His dark eyes entreated me to meet him again tomorrow. Staring at the words I've just written, I still can't believe it happened...but it did.
Wanting to throw the book into the fire, Severus instead made himself leaf through stomach churning descriptions of how the pair had fallen in love and how happy they'd been until it was time for the seal-people to migrate onward, compelled by nature to travel the ocean. The last words of the journal made his heart stop, and then pound with jealousy.
He promises to come to me at the time of year I love so much. Selkies are very curious about the land folk and their lives, and enjoy wandering among them for short periods of time. The strand of pearls he gave me are a token of his love, and through them, he can find me, wherever I go. How I long for Christmas!
Somehow, he found himself opening her closet, moving to her jewelry chest, and looking through the drawers until he found a strand of pearls that he'd admired once and been told that they were a 'family heirloom'. Snape's grip tightened upon the necklace. A gasp sounded from the bedroom, and he turned to face his lover with the journal clenched in one hand and the pearls in the other.
Lorelei took one look at Snape and knew he had discovered her secret. The moment the journal came she knew she'd have to find some way to tell him, but she'd been afraid. So she'd clung to him with a frantic need to show her love- and raised his suspicions, which she realized... Watching her lover draw near, she confessed, "I think I wanted you to read that." Her lips curved wryly, "My mother once left a book on Human Reproduction in her bedside table drawer when she wanted me to know the facts, but didn't want to have to explain them, and I believe I hoped to do the same thing with you."
Severus' face was an expressionless mask, but his eyes were gleaming in a way that made her insides flutter in apprehension. His voice was cold when he inquired,
"If I had not read it, when would you have told me- when the man showed up on the doorstep...?"
The pearls were lifted, and then flung at her. As she caught them and placed the strand on a table, he sneered,
"Family heirloom..."
She felt tears starting to well. Trying to keep her composure, she whispered, "They're from my father."
Frozen in place, his eyes searched hers as he asked, incredulously,
"Your father...then the author of this book is..."
"My mother."
He looked down at the book and said tonelessly,
"The writing...I thought it was yours..."
Lorelei took the book, placed it aside, and grasped his hands with hers. As his dark gaze met her own, she said, "I'm sorry I didn't tell you...I never dreamed you'd think...I don't know what to say...except I love you, and I hope...this doesn't change the way you feel about me."
Strong arms embraced her, held her tightly against him. The lean man rested his cheek against her curls and said quietly,
Love is not love, which alters when it alteration finds...
Answering with Shakespeare- it was so Snape; she couldn't help smiling, and then stifling a yawn. Observing her, Severus' mouth curved. Leading her to the bed, he gently undressed her before disrobing and joining her under the covers. Resting with her head against his chest, she confided, "My mother sent the journal because she knew that I wanted you to meet my father...that I wanted him to know the man that I love. I never said anything to her, but she knew...maternal magic, I suppose." The skin beneath her cheek vibrated as he chuckled silently and replied,
"If you can accept my family's history of Dark Magic and my own past, I can come to terms with your family of sirens and selkies."
Her lids had just started to close when Severus tensed as if he'd just thought of something, and said,
"Lorelei..."
"Hmm?"
"You don't have a...seal skin...hidden around anywhere, do you?"
She knew he could feel her silent giggles as she assured, "No, love...that's a myth...selkies use magic, not a skin, to transform...but don't worry, I'm a siren, not a selkie. Although, I do have a fondness for fish and playing in water."
Amusement laced his dark silky voice as he countered,
"I'm fond of those too...does that mean I'm part selkie?"
"Well, you do have dark, irresistible eyes..."
He also had a beguiling bark of laughter. Listening to his heartbeat while his hands softly caressed her hair and back, Lorelei became so relaxed, she drifted off to sleep and dreamed of floating in Severus' arms in the deep blue sea, surrounded by seals.
In the morning, she woke alone, and stumbled out of bed to the shower. Pulling on the first jumper and pair of jeans she came to- Slytherin green and black, just a coincidence- the barefoot woman stepped into the lounge and smiled. Severus was scowling over an article in the Prophet. Lorelei watched his lips curl in disgust, then purse in disapproval- captivated.
"Are you going to come have breakfast, or do you prefer to stand and stare?"
That tone of his made her smile. After standing and staring for another moment, she sat in the chair closest to his and leaned forward to remove the cozy from the teapot and pour a cup. Sipping her tea, Lorelei resumed her favorite morning pastime- watching her lover read, drink, and eat- enjoying the view. A playfully satirical eyebrow rose as the paper was put aside and a gleam lit the Potions Master's dark eyes. He said dryly,
"I've just deduced the secret behind my appeal. Seals are inordinately fond of cold fish."
Setting down her teacup, she was out of her chair and onto his lap in an instant. Threading her fingers through his soft black hair, Lorelei said meaningfully, "That's why seals devour their cold fish whenever they can." The smile that curved Severus' mouth following her words was so adorably smug; she just had to kiss it. Sweet, soft kisses lengthened and deepened as she gave her love, and took his in return.
Apparating outside the gates of Hogwarts, Remus Lupin noticed a man standing just inside them, staring at the castle. As he opened the gate and slipped through, the stranger turned and gazed steadily at the former professor. Dressed in a black fisherman's jumper and black trousers, the man carried a cloak and bag, and seemed not to notice the cold, or the flakes of snow drifting onto his unprotected head.
Never good at guessing age, Remus thought the visitor some years older than himself, although the raven-black hair showed no gray, and the pearl-white skin of his handsome face had no lines of age. It was the unfamiliar man's large, slightly mournful, black eyes that hinted at years of wisdom and a secret sadness. Shaking himself out of his reverie, the brown-haired man asked, "May I help you?"
"I wish to see Lorelei. Take me to her."
"Come with me." A corner of Remus' mind wondered why he was so eagerly bringing a stranger into Hogwarts to see his friend without asking any questions, but the rest of his brain was lulled by the almost musical tones of the man's voice into willing compliance. He felt as though he were walking with a friend of his that he hadn't seen in a long time. The men's silence was companionable as they entered the castle. Brown eyes glanced at compelling black while he explained, "She'll be in the Great Hall having lunch now." Inclining his head, he continued, "We'll go right through those doors."
The man smiled his thanks as they entered the massive chamber. The student tables were empty, and the few children that remained sat with the professors who had opted not to leave at the Staff Table. Remus wasn't surprised to see the students chatting eagerly with Tonks and her friends. He wouldn't want to sit down by the Potions Master either. Snape looked up and stared at the man beside his childhood nemesis. His sallow face paled unattractively. Black eyes immediately turned to look down the table.
Lupin followed the gaze to the woman rising from her chair. Lorelei's skin became even whiter, and then tinged with pink. Conversations around the table halted as she swiftly moved toward the stranger who was smiling and dropping his things to open his arms wide. The siren threw herself into the man's arms, and smiled as he kissed her hair, and cheeks and whispered, musical voice choked with emotion,
"Ronan"
Ronan...why was the man calling Lorelei 'Ronan', or little seal? Who was he and why was Snape looking so indulgently at the couple embracing before everyone? If some guy walked in and started calling his woman pet names while kissing and hugging her, the bloke would be missing some limbs...because he'd rip them off. A low growl sounded in the werewolf's throat. Hearing the sound, the woman stepped back and hooked her arm through the man's and smiled mistily up at him.
"Tynan, this is Remus Lupin...a dear friend of mine. Remus, this is Tynan...my father."
Shaking the man's hand before heading toward the table and Tonks, Lupin could see the familial resemblance in the color of skin, eyes, hair and the identically persuasive smiles the father and daughter shared. Now that the man's attention was focused elsewhere, the former DA teacher realized just how easily he'd been swayed by Tynan, and his mind started trying to analyze how it had been done. He sat beside his sweetheart, who looked admiringly at Lorelei's father before she noticed him noticing and smiled apologetically. Dumbledore welcomed their visitor and offered his hospitality, which was immediately accepted.
Remus listened to the conversation that eddied around him during the rest of the meal. Tynan was from Hoy, an Orkney Island. His people were 'of the sea'. When McGonagall asked just what that meant, Lorelei quickly said 'fishermen' and the man agreed with an ironic smile. After watching the man eat a plate of sushi, Remus' suspicions were confirmed.
After dinner was over, Tonks nodded her head toward the man who was leaving the chamber with his daughter,
"Lorelei's dad is bit different, eh?"
Giving a bark of laughter, he replied smilingly, "You have no idea."
A/N: A bit different, eh? LOL Tell me when you knew the journal was Marina's and not Lorelei's...I'm curious...so humor me! lol. I tried to make a subtle hint in the Masquerade chap when Lorelei mentioned she was glad her mom had Jean-Luc since her dad was 'what he was'...but maybe I was too subtle- lol. Review and give a gift to a needy writer:-)
