Disclaimer: The Gryffindor gang each wanted their own private pov told, but I had to tell them no- too much trouble. After I threatened to send any complainers to the library with Ginny, they settled down to share quite nicely; although a few of them acted up a bit...you'll see. Naughty characters! lol
Chapter 31- Marauder Mischief
The small side courtyard adjacent to the front entrance may have been attractive once, but Neville doubted it. His Herbology-honed brown eyes noted the sad lack of variety in shrubbery. Boxwood was nice, he supposed, but a militarily precise planting of it up against the walls made the small space feel even more claustrophobically enclosed. The round-faced boy mentally uprooted the boxwood and replaced the bushes with three dwarf evergreens, mixed plantings of annual and perennial grasses and flowers, and added a decorative fountain in the middle. His pleasant face beamed with satisfaction at the vision of how the space would look once he'd improved it.
The slim blond observing Neville's goofy smile hoped the other boy was thinking about a girl and not some stupid plant. Longbottom's obsession with Herbology was weird. Now if it was photography, he would relate better. Capturing images of people and things was inspiring, especially some of the pictures he'd taken of girls at Hogwarts.
He'd taken a picture this morning, of Harry and Ronan fighting, that was sure to be one of his favorites. The way Harry had grabbed Ronan's arm and looked ready to shake or snog her, maybe both, made the shot a winner. He was still debating whether to give the photo to his hero or keep it. Boyishly handsome features broke into a grin that he was proud girls called adorable.
The grin on Creevey's face made Hermione slightly uneasy. The brunette was used to thinking of Colin as a harmless boy, almost genderless, and that smile was...disturbingly male. Averting her gaze, she moved closer to Ron. He obligingly opened his cloak so she could snuggle against his warm body. Mmmm...having a boyfriend was wonderful in so many ways.
His blue eyes were as bright as the cold, clear sky. Last night, as they'd patrolled the corridors, she'd made her inner know-all happy and sad by attempting to give a kiss for each freckle and discovering that it couldn't be done in one makeout session. The pouting internal voice had been cheered by the inner list queen's rattling off all the different places in school she could go to try again in the future. Rubbing her cheek against the maroon jumper that went so well with Weasley red hair, amber eyes locked onto Ron's as she smiled.
Tightening his embrace, Ronald grinned happily at his girlfriend. The days since they'd returned from holiday had been brilliant. He'd never realized how many places he'd marked down in his mind as excellent for snogging until he'd finally gotten a girlfriend to use them with. The boy was quite chuffed with his impressive memory. If only Harry would sort himself out, everything would be ace. Looking sideways to where his best mate was pacing back and forth watching the door intently, as if he could make a girl appear there by willpower, Ron's lips turned downward. He didn't approve of Harry crushing on Lorelei and then trying something on with her little sister, but what could he say- go for the teacher instead? Both were upsetting ideas.
Why, oh why couldn't Ginny and Harry have hit it off ...everything would've been so perfect, instead of...messy. Ron and his girlfriend had tried to discuss their friend's situation after breakfast, but talk of romantic obsession had led to them snogging instead of thinking of ways to help. Remembering the look on 'Mione's face when he'd said, 'I think about you too, but you don't hear me shouting it for the world to hear...Harry needs self control', the youngest Weasley boy smirked.
A sidelong glance confirmed that everyone waiting was in a good mood except him. Harry tried to smile, but it felt forced, and he quit attempting to be anything other than impatient. The boy gripped his hair with his hands and made himself stop pacing. Lorelei...Ronan...had said she'd meet them after picking up a few things, she wasn't late, and he should stop obsessing... Round glasses reflected a ray of sunlight as he closed his eyes. Obsessed seemed to be the word of the day...was he really obsessed?
He was a guy. Wizard Health class sure seemed to portray the male animal as a must-populate-planet-single-handedly creature driven by testosterone and therefore to be pitied. Reluctantly amused by his thoughts, Harry chuckled. His eyes flashed over to where the door was opening. The sight of the girl smiling mischievously made the boy decide to forget about everything except enjoying the day.
Handing her unwanted admirer the rucksack she'd packed full of 'special' things for the pranks to be played, Lorelei smiled at the students calling her Ronan and held out a picnic basket to Neville.
"Would you mind carrying this? It's our lunch and must be kept safe at all costs."
Gazing at the charmed-to-featherweight basket, the boy grinned at her playful words. Neville decided then and there to stop allowing his Grandmother to cut his hair and said,
"I'll carry it, sure."
Harry shook the sack, causing the wavy-haired girl to say sharply,
"Cut that out! There's stuff in there that will explode if you keep shaking!"
Immediately, everyone gathered around. A slender hand prevented Ron from opening the rucksack. Colin grinned,
"Who's walking with you under your Invisibility Cloak, Ronan? I'm happy to volunteer."
"Oh, thanks...how about you Neville? Want to join us and let the Dream Team stay together?"
Green eyes narrowed. She was avoiding him. It just proved that Lorelei was scared of the attraction between them and sooner or later she'd have to give in to it. He hoped it was sooner.
Content not to have Harry breathing down her neck, or in her ear, all the way past the school gates, the temporarily youthful woman enjoyed her whispered conversation with the two quiet Gryffindors. Neville was amazingly knowledgeable about the plants they passed, and Colin told her a story about Filch and Mrs. Norris that had her giggling. Once the students passed through the boundary gates unnoticed, they threw off the Cloaks and stretched. Noticing the direction of The-Boy-Who-Lived-To-Stare's gaze, Lorelei hastily buttoned her black dragon-hide coat and concealed the jumper that she now wished was less clingy.
"We match"
Harry watched the girl's reaction to his observation that the coats they were wearing were almost identical with amusement. She frowned. He whispered,
"The day you transfigured this coat for me, I dreamed about kissing you under the mistletoe." Ronan/Lorelei elbowed him in the side and ran up to walk beside Neville. He laughed.
"Hey mate, will you cut out the heavy breathing? Let's just keep things light, have fun, okay?"
Ron looked anxiously at his friend. Hermione had whispered furiously that if those two kept up the drama, she was going back to school so he needed to talk to Harry guy-to-guy, and tell him to leave off. Ron had readily agreed. Emotional stuff should be private, not public. His eyes lightened in relief when the other boy smiled wryly and said,
"Okay"
On the outskirts of Hogsmeade, the group halted and turned from the view of thatched cottages and shops to look at the 'girl' whose face was alight with anticipation. Lorelei held an upraised palm out to Harry, and swatted his arm away with a stern look when he pretended she wanted to hold his hand. He grinned unrepentantly and handed over the rucksack. Meeting each eager gaze, she asked,
"Did you know that in the pubs, villagers talk about how no students have dared prank on a grand scale since the days of the Marauders? We're about to change that. Tomorrow, they'll be talking about us."
Accepting the pair of omnioculars from Lorelei/Ronan, the teen watched her hand more out. She whispered to Neville, who looked chuffed. He hurried off. The rest raised their omnioculers to follow the boy's progress to the OWL office. By the time he'd returned they were laughing. Ron asked,
"How'd you stick that galleon to the sidewalk?"
"I used a superglue spell."
The group watched as person after person walked up to the galleon, stopped, and tried unsuccessfully to pick the money up. Some laughed; some rolled their eyes or looked sour- several even cursed, red-faced before giving up. All reactions were hilarious. Finally, a little old lady tapped the galleon so determinedly with her cane that Neville waved his wand to counter the spell, muttering,
"Sorry. She reminds me of my Gran." They all agreed the woman had earned her money.
Huddling in a circle, the Gryffindors looked on as Ronan rummaged in the sack and brought out three spray bottles with some red-colored liquid inside. Handing them to Ron, Hermione, and Harry, the girl gave Potter an icy look but otherwise ignored the way he slid his fingers over hers before taking the sprayer and said briskly,
"We'll need to break up into two teams for our next couple of pranks. We're going to be doing what the Marauder's called, 'Community Service Projects'. The two nastiest pieces of work in the village were always paid a visit- and if they didn't learn a lesson, it at least gave the people something to talk about down at the pub."
She elaborated, "The next street over is the one most children use to get to the shops. Two evil old hags are currently trying to make their lives miserable. One lives in that first small cottage with the enormous lawn. It's covered with a layer of snow right now, but in spring when the ice melts, it's a vision of perfection. Mrs. Sneerwell peers through her lace curtains all day, just waiting for a child to walk on her grass so she can bless them out. Well, you three are going to use a Disillusionment Charm, spray a message on her lawn in large red letters- sexy witch or something like it..."
"Won't she just spray it off with water, when she notices people laughing?"
Hermione'seyes flared with anger as Harry glared at her for daring to interrupt. She gave him a 'Sorry, did I disrupt your staring ?' look in return. The girl knew that the precise words weren't expressed...Harry wasn't that talented...but the general sentiment got through. Her friend smiled apologetically. Ronan said admiringly,
"You're absolutely correct, Ms. Granger, the real prank comes when the snow melts and the grass watered with Mage Magic Lawn Food pops up to spell 'Sexy Witch' in dark-green living letters."
The boys grinned, but Hermione frowned,
"You sounded just like Lorelei when you called me Ms. Granger."
The other girl froze, glanced sideways at Harry, and then pointed out reasonably,
"Well, she's my sister..."
Colin, bored with standing around, asked impatiently,
"What are we going to do?"
Taking the picnic basket from Hermione and passing it to Neville, Ronan explained,
"Our task is teaching Madam Grabit at the end of the street to share. She's the type who won't return anything that accidentally ends up in her garden. The old biddy yells, 'It's on my lawn, it's mine now!' and so far has kept a dozen footballs, two of them the American variety, and twice as many croquet balls. The couple who live across the street told Rosmerta and the rest of the Broomstick that they wished they could do something about it. We're going to help them."
"How?"
Answering Colin's question, the girl smiled conspiratorially,
"In her front garden is a life-sized statue of Pan that old Grabit is incredibly fond of. We're going to levitate it over by the neighbor's front step, put on an immovability spell that can't be broken unless she returns everything, and leave an M stamped note explaining all on the neighbor's door. After we're done, we'll meet up at the Shrieking Shack for a picnic. There's a secret entrance at the back behind the dead rosebush."
Neville beamed,
"Excellent. I'm getting hungry."
Perplexed by the way his words were treated as humorous; he smiled to show he got the joke- even though he didn't. What was so funny about being hungry? He wished Bindy was with them. She liked to eat too- and she was a great kisser.
The friends wished each other luck and separated. Before Ron, Harry, and Hermione performed a Disillusionment Charm to remain undetected, they approached their target. Every curtain was drawn and no lights appeared to be on in the cottage. Only a couple of kids down the street were outside. Letting go of Hermione's hand, Ron asked,
"What should we spray?"
Harry waggled his brows.
"I really like 'sexy witch'."
The taller boy retorted,
"Yeah, we know. You've been breathing in her ear all morning."
Intervening, Hermione said firmly,
"We'll spray 'Sexy Witch' and you two will quit squabbling like immature children or I'll hex both your arses."
Looking sheepish, the pair nodded agreeably, with a shared comradely smile over the 'mature' threat to hex their arses. After Harry performed his Charm, Hermione set down her sprayer, pulled Ron's head down to hers, and gave him a quick kiss and a whispered, "Good Luck". The sound of a throat clearing reminded them to get back to the business of performing the charm and prank.
At the other end of the street, Colin, Neville, and Ronan depended on whispers to pinpoint each other's locations while they were charmed to blend in with the winter landscape. Surrounding the statue, the trio used their wands to levitate the statue of the pipe playing satyr and locomotor it across to the neighbors' lawn. Placing an unmovable spell on Pan, Creevey was sent to attach a note and rap sharply on the front door then run back to the two waiting at the front gate. Snickering, he watched the neighbor open his door, see the statue, read the note, and laughingly call to his wife,
"Come here, luv, you won't believe this unless you see it!"
Neville was pleased as punch over his part in the pranks done that day. On the way to the Shrieking Shack, he imagined the admiration on Bindy's pretty face as he told her about his adventures. Once they'd gone through the secret entrance and found a room in the shack that was clean enough to have a picnic in, he realized he couldn't tell her. Dragon dung... Opening the basket and taking out an enormous blanket, he shrugged resignedly. At least there was loads of good food. Cornucopia Baskets were the best.
By the time Harry, Ron, and Hermione entered the shack, the three waiting had done a warming charm and set out the food. The six Gryffindors sat down in a circle to eat. Hermione informed between bites that they had sprayed 'Sexy Witch' onto the snow and a large crowd had gathered to gawk and have a laugh before Old lady Sneerwell rushed out to read their handiwork and shriek. The hag immediately used her wand to dump water onto the snow to erase the words. The group speculated how long it would take the grass to grow into a green sign. Colin shared his group's story and bottles of butterbeer were clinked together in a toast to Marauders- past and present.
After the lunch remains were stored back into the basket, eyes turned to Harry who waved a bottle at his friends with a meaningful look. Colin joked,
"I like you Harry, but not enough to play 'Spin the Bottle' mate...sorry."
Avoiding the narrowed stare of the girl beside him, Harry challenged his friends,
"How about Truth or Dare? The person who spins gets to give the person the bottle points to a question or a dare. Then that person would spin next, and so on..."
Figuring majority ruled, and the girls would have to live with it, he bent over to place the bottle on the center of the blanket and spun it. The narrow end pointed to Ronan/Lorelei; exactly as he'd covertly bespelled it to for whatever spin followed after he tapped the bottom three times. Leaning toward the girl, he said huskily,
"Truth or Dare"
Reluctantly, 'Ronan' said, "Truth". He couldn't ask her anything too embarrassing, could he, with his friends listening? She watched his eyes darken,
"Did you think about our kiss...later...?"
Her cheeks were burning, and her temper matched. She barely heard Ron protest,
" Harry, you promised!"
Nastily, she answered,
"No, I tried to forget it."
Harry's face was flushed too. He leaned closer to reply,
"Tried means that you didn't..."
Hermione said quickly, hoping to head off another row, or worse,
"Alright, you spin now Ronan."
The girl nodded curtly and silently reached out to give the bottle a spin. It landed on Colin.
"Truth or Dare"
The blond's eyes were wide with apprehension.
"Dare"
Ronan smiled. The sight made it hard for Creevey to swallow. He was relieved when she dared,
"Dance the Texas Two-Step with me around the room. My sister wrote that the Muggle Studies Professor bragged about how you said you knew loads of different kinds of dances and songs."
His friends gaped when he smiled in return and said,
"Sure"
Standing close, he put his right hand on her waist, and held her hand with the other. He paused, "We need music. I hear myself sing all the time, so how about you sing something?"
"Do you like Leann Rimes?"
"Yeah, my dad's a country/western fan. He's got all her CD's."
Her eyes never left his. The thought of Harry being jealous of him dancing with Ronan made it more fun when she sang Nothing 'Bout Love Makes Sense. He led off with two quick steps, enjoying the two fast, two slow-step gliding rhythm, the attention from the other Gryffindors, and girl's awesome sang with her on the chorus. Their voices blended together almost as good as they way they glided together around the floor. Too bad the room wasn't bigger. They sang the rest of the chorus as they circled back to where they'd started.
Bowing to his friends as they applauded while avoiding Harry's gaze, Colin sat back down and spun the bottle. When it landed on Neville, he asked when the boy had first kissed Bindy. Neville blushed as he told about the mistletoe before Christmas break. During the course of the game, Ron admitted to kissing Hermione on New Year's Day, Granger recited the ingredients to Polyjuice Potion while hopping on one foot and Harry walked across the room on his hands. Afterwards, Hermione admitted to reading romance novels and Ron confessed to his girlfriend that he had kissed another girl before her, but refused to say who, since that wasn't part of the question, or gentlemanly.
Once Harry had shared that he'd been disappointed not to have been made Prefect, he tapped the bottom of the bottle three times while Hermione insisted Ron tell her who he'd kissed and his friend said it didn't matter since she was the only girl he wanted to kiss now. Harry waited for them to make up and get back to the game. Looking at the girl beside him even while he gave the bottle a spin, he knew no one was surprised when it pointed to Ronan.
"Truth or Dare."
"Dare."
Hiding his satisfaction, Harry said levelly,
"I dare you to come upstairs and kiss me."
She didn't want to kiss him, but if he could just see that they didn't really have chemistry...Lorelei agreed,
"Fine, let's get this over with."
Levering herself up, the 'girl' brushed past the boy whose outstretched hand she'd disdained and made for the stairs. Behind them, Ron called,
"Be back in five minutes or we come looking for you!"
The stairs creaked as they climbed. The dust in the first room on the right was so thick it looked like a layer of chalk. The woman who appeared to be a girl thought with dark humor that the shack would make an excellent Haunted House next Halloween. Turning to the boy, Lorelei closed her eyes and parted her lips, wanting the kiss over and done with.
Staring at her resigned face, Harry ordered,
"Open your eyes. I want you to know it's me kissing you this time."
The 'girl' wished that she could stay angry. It would make things so much easier. She had more of her father in her than she'd thought, and it was starting to worry her. The only other male she'd ever wanted to be happy so much was Severus, and there was no way in Hades she'd treat Harry the same way. Still, Lorelei didn't want to crush the boy; she just wanted him to stop crushing on her. If looking at him during the kiss made it easier for him to accept reality, she'd do it. Sighing, she kept her gaze on his while Harry softly pressed his lips to hers.
He was tired of kissing girls that didn't kiss back. He tried again, pressing her back against the wall.
Ah crap. Harry wasn't taking the hint from her lack of response and he was a lot stronger than she'd thought. Lorelei used the Voice,
"Back off, Harry!"
Unable to resist, he backed away while she rushed past him toward the door. Downstairs, she feigned nonchalance until The-Boy-Who-Wouldn't-Take-A-Hint started chuckling. Swinging around, she demanded scathingly,
"What are you laughing at?" The suppressed mirth behind her caused the 'girl' to turn on her heel and ask, "What?" A hand brushed her back. Snapping "Don't touch me." Lorelei stepped out of Harry's reach and looked at the other girl, "What is it?"
Matter-of-factly, Hermione informed while standing and brushing off Ronan's back,
"You're covered in dust."
"Need some help?" Colin offered eagerly.
"NO!"
The girls shared a smile at their simultaneous answers. Hermione stifled the slightly envious wish that it had been she and her boyfriend dared to go kiss upstairs. She smiled internally at the thought that she wouldn't have been the only one covered in dust if that'd happened. She would've been brushing dust off Ron's backside too.
Averting his gaze, Ronald cleared his throat and said,
"Perhaps we should just go back to school now...unless...we have another prank to play..."
In answer, Ronan walked over to the rucksack and lifted out a couple of jars filled with a fine brown powder. Trying not to sound professorial, she explained,
"This is what I said would explode- it's iodine crystals and ammonium hydroxide mixed together and dried to create pressure sensitive, harmless, but satisfyingly loud and sparking, snap powder."
"Crikey, Fred and George would love that for their shop!" Ron grinned.
"I'll bet." the girl agreed, "It's something I learned from a Muggle friend who told me that what they lack in magic they compensate for with science and imagination."
"What kind of friend- boyfriend?"
"Stop it, you two, or so help me..."
Taking Hermione's hand in his, Ron interrupted his girl before she could threaten to hex and asked quickly,
"So who are we going to prank with that stuff?"
Colin suggested,
"How about Slytherin House? We could use the Invisibility Cloaks and sprinkle the snap powder from their Common Room all the way down the corridor."
Neville agreed,
"Sounds good, and how about using some around the Hog's Head. The people who go in there deserve a prank for being so nasty."
The group unanimously agreed and left the Shrieking Shack. Colin darted over to sprinkle Snap Powder on the front walkway of the tavern, and using the Invisibility Cloaks; they returned to school and liberally dusted the Slytherin corridor. Afterwards, the six headed back to Gryffindor House. As they passed the dungeons, 'Ronan' stopped and handed Neville a large manila envelope from the sack. Placing her hand on his shoulder, she looked into his eyes, held up a strange can of something and said,
"Neville, due to your managing mischief above and beyond the call of Marauder duty, you deserve the honor of pranking Snape. So here it is- you fill the envelope with this Muggle Shaving Cream, squish it down into the very bottom, and place the flat end of the envelope under Snape's office door. Then you stomp down as hard as you can on the full end and the fluffy stuff will shoot out and fill the room. Pick up the envelope, and he'll never know how it was done."
Face set in bold determination; Longbottom nodded, took the items and headed for the dungeon stairs. At the first step, he turned.
"Harry?"
Grinning, Harry answered the unspoken question by saying,
"I'll come with you, mate."
His eyes flickered to the girl who'd been ignoring him. She was smiling approvingly. His spirits and hopes lifted. He headed for the stairs.
After Neville and Harry ran back up the steps, the Gryffindors walked toward their House, passing students who looked at them curiously. Ginny, returning from the library, met up with them as they turned into the corridor leading to their Common Room and said,
"People noticed when none of you showed up for lunch. Any pranks you pull, they're going to know who did it."
Harry's lips curved in satisfaction,
"So what? No one can prove it."
He grinned. The day had been ace. His happy feeling evaporated when he saw the bloke chatting up The Fat Lady. The guy was way too good-looking, and knew it. The stranger smiled and shouted, "Ronan!" She threw her arms around the boy and hugged him tightly.
Everyone stared from the couple to Harry, wondering what new drama they'd be forced to witness. Pulling back from the youth who stood close with his arm around her waist, the girl's eyes sparkled as she introduced, "Kieran, my little brother." to the Gryffindors. Shaking hands with the teen he should've recognized earlier, they looked a lot alike, Harry said meaningfully, "Do you mean you're the younger twin?" The grateful smile the girl threw his way made him want to kiss her again.
"Yes, I am younger...by ten...minutes...right, sister?"
"Right"
She told the others she was going to spend some time with her brother and would see them at dinner. The siblings walked off without looking back. Harry knew because he watched them until they were out of sight. Ron challenged him to Wizard Chess, and even though he didn't really feel like it, the boy decided to try and act normal, so he accepted.
Entering his office, Professor Snape stared at the white bits of foam that clung to every surface. A pink blob in a floating specimen jar was rubbing up against the glass where a white blob clung. That was especially disturbing. Reaching out a finger, he touched the mysterious substance and brought it up to his nose to smell it.
"Muggle shaving cream..."
Unperturbed, Severus waited patiently while the 'girl' vanished the mess with a wave of her wand. Shutting the door behind her, Lorelei threw herself into his arms with such enthusiasm that he was forced to step back, into a chair that he was then pressed down upon. Lovingly trailing her fingers over his features and through his hair, she made a purring sound of contentment.
Breaking contact with the lips that pouted like a...teenager's...he drawled, "I strolled down to the village for a drink this afternoon. All everyone could talk about was the return of the Marauders and all the pranks the plucky students had pulled. Know anything about that?" Her mischievous smile showed that she did, but his temporarily youthful lover said laughingly,
"I plead the fifth."
Darkly, he reminded her, "You're not in America, and you forfeited the right not to incriminate yourself the moment you allowed shaving cream to be placed in my office."
"I don't remember? It was all a blur? You'll never make me talk?"
He promised, "I have ways to make you talk."
Her eyes gleamed with anticipation. She gasped,
"Do your worst."
Huffing with laughter, he began to kiss her deeply. Only his phenomenal self-control enabled him to stop and ask again if there was anything she'd like to share. Giving her lover a look that made Snape wonder if he'd be 'tortured' one day soon, she rapidly spilled the events of the day in order to have his lips return to hers.
Pondering the account awhile later, he said skeptically, "You had a picnic in the Shrieking Shack and Potter never suggested playing Spin the Bottle?"
Lorelei admitted,
"Harry did waggle a bottle of butterbeer, but Colin told him that he liked him, but not that much, sorry, mate, so no kissing games went on and we came back here. We pranked Slytherin House and you. My brother was waiting for me, and we talked…he's having a great time. After that, I came to see you."
The explanation was truthful, but omitting something. About to resort to more 'torture' to find out what, the man was halted by the pounding on the door. Crabbe and Goyle's voices bellowed,
"Professor Snape, are you in there?"
"Help us sir, someone's trying to blow up Slytherin house!"
Throwing an incredulous look toward the door, Lorelei whispered fiercely,
"We used Snap Powder down the Slytherin corridor. Lots of sparks and loud bangs, but nothing harmful...you should give them detention for being so stupid!"
Severus countered, "I should give a silly schoolgirl detention for playing pranks. Instead, I'll deal with you after I calm the hysterical down and clean up the mess Gryffindors made of my corridor." He paused with his hand on the door handle when she inquired silkily,
"Shall I wait on the bed or in the bath?"
Deliberating a moment, he chose, "The bath", swept out the door, and informed the two dunderheads who promptly trailed after him as he strode toward the stairs that they were mistaken. The sound they heard was not giggling.
A/N: Love the Marauders, & all the fics I've read about them. Had to have our group pull some pranks in memory! Review and let know what you liked- I live for your Reviews people:D
