A/N: To Kendra: Continued thanks for all the lovely reviews! I should probably be doing a better job of fixing up people's grammar mistakes. I apologize. Also, for the journals, they are public unless the character marks the entry as private or private to a certain person(s). So some of the ones you read, all the characters could read and some were private. It's a part of the game that lets us develop character relationships without always having to write, or without the characters being in the same place. For example, Vicious and Spike had a lot of 'journal' contact that led up to their showdown, but it's too hard to incorporate into a fic format so it gets left out.

Oh, and the love from Vicious to Spike that was referenced in the conversation between he and Julia was fraternal love.

Thanks!
Kajouka

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Trounced

Flashback

Vicious sat in the driver's seat of the 2070 convertible. It was top of the line, and the nicest car Vicious had ever been in, much less driven. He turned to look at Spike, who was busy loading his weapon. "So what was the assignment?" he asked, as he reached down and pulled out his Colt. He checked the clip - it was already loaded, then he reached into the back and pulled out a few spare clips, which he slipped into the pocket of his coat.

Once done, his attention focused back to Spike, who had gotten their first mission from Yenrai that morning.

Spike sighed. A pair of loaded Jerichos rested on the dash, and several spare magazines filled his pockets. "We're supposed to get some files," he said, disappointed with the mundanity of the mission. "Which shouldn't be too hard. Some politico that we had was running the front for some drug running business - I didn't quite catch all the details. Anyway, he messed up, so he's gonna be bumped off tonight. But since we want the business to stay alive without him, we'll need the files to run the place. Which is why the two of us are going to be breaking into a high-security building to steal a few bundles of paper. And we've got to make it look like those files were "misplaced," so we can't get spotted or they'll know it was us."

Spike leaned back in the car's seat, closed his eyes, and lit a cigarette. Wordless, he offered one to Vicious. "Maybe this is Mao Yenrai's subtle way of telling us he doesn't mind if we get killed."

He glanced out the window. Across the street loomed the office building. Three armed guards stood in front of the revolving glass doors, and two more patrolled the courtyard. Countless others waited inside. "You have any ideas?"

Vicious took the offered cigarette and paused as Spike lit it for him. "Sounds incredibly boring. If we can't get seen, that means we have to get in, get out, and get the files without being seen and without killing anyone." Vicious sighed, where was the excitement in that?

He took a long drag of the cigarette while he thought. "Well, the front door is obviously out, unless we stroll up like we're supposed to be there, which is a possibility. Did Yenrai give you anything? Floor plans? Or where these files might be?"

Spike passed Vicious a manila envelope that contained a set of folded-up floor plans for each of the building's eight floors. On the seventh floor was a red "X" denoting the location of the files. Stairwells, emergency doors, and security cameras were marked as well. "Read your heart out. I was thinking we go up the fire escape, but the door in is locked. I can pick locks, but I'd prefer not to in full view of the public while sitting on an ancient, rusty fire escape."

"And I'm guessing blowing it away with your gun would probably not be high on Yenrai's list of options," Vicious replied, pulling out the floor plans and taking a look. "Alright, back here there's a door. If we slide in here, then cut around to the stairs, we can get up to the seventh floor, get the shit, and get back out." He glanced around again. "Security cameras down all these hallways - we'll have to go around this way."

He handed the floor plan back to Spike and pointed out the route he was considering. He took one last drag on his cigarette, and tossed it out the window. "Let's just get this over with. There is a glass of whiskey already calling my name............" He and Spike had made a habit of late night drinking binges.

"I like the way you think, partner," Spike said with a smile, discarding his own cigarette. He picked up his twin Jerichos and stepped out the car door. "C'mon. Let's go."

Vicious slipped out of the car, grabbing his katana and sliding it into his belt, before following Spike. They slipped around the back as planned, and when the door wouldn't open, Vicious simply shrugged and kicked it in. The action made more noise than he would have liked. "Better than shooting it right?" They had to get into the building somehow.

Spike glanced around. The loud clang had attracted the attention of one of the security guards in front, who was now shouting something else to the others. Two of them ran inside. "Uh, Vicious, we better hurry," he said, stepping in the doorway. Once they were both inside, he jammed it closed. He didn't want anyone following them. "Up the stairs, right?"

Vicious nodded, and pulled the door open. "Hurry," he repeated, more to himself than to Spike. He dashed up the stairs, taking the steps two at a time. Stopping on the seventh floor to wait for Spike, he pulled out the plot plan again. "Alright, the left hall has a camera, the right one doesn't. Should take the right hall, and bust into the room from here." He held the plan out and pointed to the spot he was speaking of. "You ready for this?"

"Yeah," Spike replied, slightly out of breath. "I'll find the files while you keep an eye out for guards. This kind of thing is my specialty." In fact, he'd been doing a job similar to this one - albeit without the heavy security - when Yenrai had first contacted him. Jericho raised, Spike opened the door, ready to bolt down the right-hand hallway towards the office.

Four guards, submachine guns raised, stood facing them.

Spike slammed the door closed and dropped to the ground as bullets tore through the door and filled the air above their heads. "Shit!"

Vicious dove to the ground as well, and rolled down a few stairs. He looked back up at Spike, and pulled his Colt out. "Is it too late to do this without making a scene?" he asked, half-excited about the prospects of killing each and every one of the goons shooting at him. "Let's hit the sixth floor, rush to the other side and head up those stairs. If we don't get those papers, Yenrai isn't going to be happy." He didn't bother mentioning that Yenrai was going to be furious at them anyway.

He scooted down the stairs until he was low enough to stand again, then headed down to the sixth. A quick check proved that this floor was empty, although he had a feeling it wouldn't stay that way for long. "Let's go, Spike," he said, gun raised, as he shot out the security camera, before dashing down the hallway. The sounds of the elevator opening indicated more goons were on their way.

He frowned. The seventh floor would be crawling then. Pressing his back against the wall, he waited as the goons headed his way. If he and Spike didn't take them out, they'd have no way of getting out of the building. "You didn't happen to pack a few grenades did you?"

"You know what?" Spike called back. "That would have been a really, really good idea." He silently swore to himself that if they made it out of this alive, he'd never again go on a job without some. "Since we've already been spotted ..."

He stepped out into the hall and fired twice. One of the guards cried out in pain and dropped, clutching his right arm. A bullet whizzed through Spike's hair, far too close for comfort, and he hastily ducked back behind the wall next to Vicious. "There's five of them right now, and more on their way," he panted. He gestured to the window on the other side of the hall. They could climb out it to the fire escape, but they'd have to run across the hall in full view of the submachine gun-packing guards. "You think we can make it?"

"You go first, while I cover you, then I'll make a run for it while you cover," Vicious replied. "We don't have much choice. There are only two of us and a shitload of them." He peaked around the corner. Four men with guns were standing there waiting for them to make a move. "Well, here goes nothing." Vicious leaned around the corner, and began firing.

Keeping low, Spike dashed the seven feet across the open hallway. He found he wasn't quite fast enough, however, as a bullet embedded itself in his shoulder. He dropped the Jericho he'd been holding in his right hand, but maintained the grip with his left. Once across the hallway, he paused a moment, then stepped out into the open. "Okay, now! Go!"

Vicious took down two of the goons during Spike's dash, and another after Spike had made it across the hall. He leaned back behind the wall, until Spike indicated he should go. He followed Spike's motions, dashing across the hallway trying to avoid the constant stream of bullets.

His luck was worse than Spike's. A bullet torn through his abdomen. He rolled to the ground, stopping just behind the wall. "Shit," he muttered, pulling himself to his knees. "Shit."

Transferring the gun to his bad hand, Spike slipped his good arm around Vicious' waist and hauled his friend to his feet. "Let's just get the hell out of here, files or not," he said, heading for the window. "Do you think you can climb?"

"Yeah," Vicious replied, standing on his feet. "You don't look so hot yourself," he joked trying to make light of their situation. The familiar ding of the elevator doors sounded behind them and Vicious frowned. "We don't have much time." He took a step forward, winced in pain, ignored it, and hurried with Spike to the window.

"Yenrai's going to kill us," he said, pulling himself out of the window and leaning on the railing as he waited for Spike.

"Yeah," Spike agreed, firing a shot at a man who rounded the corner before ducking through the window. "If they don't first."

Half out onto the fire escape, a sudden fiery impact sent Spike stumbling forward, sprawling over the edge of the railing. He grabbed on to the rusted metal, face a grimace of pain. "Shot in the ass," he gasped..... "Literally."

Putting far more weight on the railing than he should have, Spike limped for the rickety stairs down. They were six stories off the ground - it seemed endless.

Gunfire spat out the window. In another few seconds, they'd be out on the fire escape and he and Vicious would be toast.

"Here goes nothing," he muttered.

Tucking his gun into his pocket, Spike planted his good arm on the railing and vaulted over the edge. With a heavy clang, he landed on the platform below, flat on his back. Steel slats dug into his already-wounded behind. He just wanted to close his eyes and go to sleep - and there were five stories and a long run to the car left to go before they were safe. "Vicious?"

"Yeah Spike," Vicious said from the platform above. He sighed, wondering where Spike had gotten the bright idea to jump over the rail to the next platform. Pulling himself up, he forced himself over the edge, but once he let go of the railing he missed the platform with his body, and only a hand managed to find something to hold on to. "At this rate, we'll be dead before we realize it," he muttered, clenching his teeth to try and ignore the pain.

He looked down. His feet weren't far from the next platform and if he swung a bit he might make it. He reached up with his other hand and gave himself a small push, swung under the platform and dropped. Four floors to go.

Spike slipped over the edge of the platform, dangled for a moment, then dropped onto the one Vicious was on. "Here," he panted, offering Vicious a boost. "If we help each other out, it'll be easier and faster." Suddenly he ducked to the side, as a brief rain of bullets flurried down on them from above. "Shit!" Drawing his Jericho, he fired back, but his own fire only ricocheted off the network of steel bars. The guards were hurrying down the stairs of the sixth platform.

Spike dashed to the edge of the fourth platform. "C'mon! I'll lower you down, then you help me. We're getting close."

Teamwork? Vicious nodded as he moved to the edge of the platform, took Spike's hand, and let himself be lowered down. The action was repeated until both of them, had reached the ground. Vicious forced himself to run towards the car, looking over his shoulder only long enough to fire off a few shots, all of which were badly off the mark.

Spike slid into the car's passenger seat and slammed the door behind him, then opened the door on the other side for Vicious. With a grimace, he wrapped a scrap of cloth around his bleeding arm. "You can drive, right?"

"We'll find out," Vicious replied, coughing as he slid into the car. He started the engine up, just as gunfire blew out the window. "Let's hope anyway." He gunned the engine, and pushing down on the pedal, peeled out... It hurt like hell, but Vicious decided the pain was better than dying. "So, did we actually accomplish anything?" he asked, rounding the corner at top speed and hauling out of there as fast as he could. Damn, he needed a doctor. A glance at Spike told him his partner wasn't much better off.

Spike leaned back in his seat, eyes clamped shut, trying to put as little weight as possible on his rear and failing miserably. "I got shot in the ass," he suggested, voice strained. "We both got shot. And those people are gonna be on guard now, so getting in will be practically impossible."

Vicious looked down. His entire jacket was soaked through with blood. "I hope they have extras," he muttered as he turned the car into the Red Dragon parking garage. "So ... who tells Yenrai about this?" He parked, then leaned back against the seat, the last of his strength exhausted.

"I do," Spike replied. "But you get to come along for moral support. After, of course, we get out of the infirmary."

--------------------

James strolled out of the BB II, musing about the message had received earlier from Mela. At one point she was the love of his life, but had turned into just a distant memory... or had she? He was going to meet her. Things would unfold when he would arrive at the Stockholm. Normally, he would have taken the zip, but he hadn't been to Estoria in quite a few. Plus, the Stockholm was only a few blocks away.

Contently inside Stockholm, Mela sat inside a little, icy room to the side of the bar. It wasn't really her style to sit blankly in the middle of such a lively place, so in the dark she peered at the door for her guest. She silently pondered the slight future, the meeting with her old flame. But that wasn't what she needed to be worrying about at the moment. Only time would tell what would come of the whole incident.

Entering Stockholm, Jades took a glance around. He had many fond memories from this place, but he could revisit those on a later occasion. At the moment, his concern was Mela. Searching for her, he was unsure if she was all ready there or not. He remembered her always being one for the action, but James couldn't spot her anywhere. It hadn't occurred to him that she could have changed her appearance until just then.

There he was. James, the same old James. Time had grown on him but still the same man, she knew, inside. Her hand rose a slight bit, to wave him to her side. But her arm descended when she thought of how he would respond. Of course, Mela did like a little sport to watch James squander around, searching for her. Her unsteady breath slowed when she made eye contact with him, shortly after. This was it; Showtime.

He was flustered, not having considered one of the small rooms the bar had available. Nodding to her, he made his way over. She looked the same, but it seemed her eyes had lost that golden shine James had remembered once gazing into. Her hair might been a little longer, but she still had the same pale complexion and expression. He had seen that expression more than he would have liked. With a small smile he spoke softly, trying to get the words out, "Hello, Mela.."

"James." Her solid response lingered in the silent air. "It's been quite a while," Mela said after the uncomfortable loss of words. She drifted back into her seat and motioned for him to sit. Mela opened her lips again to let the words escape, "What've you been doing all this time?" Her dead eyes locked onto James, expecting some jackass statement. But luckily, she was never out of comebacks. The angry mouth of hers would eventually take over in any scenario. It was expected that one of them would get angry, but she knew she was only analyzing their past selves.

Taking a seat, James leaned back, relaxing a bit. He could tell Mela wasn't in the best of moods, but then why had she wanted to meet? Smirking, he would answer her nice and bluntly honest. He could be an ass in this situation, but a small part of him still deeply loved Mela. Despite the differences that had set them apart, he wanted her back. "Well, I've become a space pirate. What have you been doing?" He'd get to the question of why he was there when the moment was right.

A rare smile poked onto Mela's face. "A Pirate? Hmm, your destiny is one of a pirate? I would have never thought..." Her eyes went away from him, it was like staring at your favorite mistake. "Well," Mela began with her eyes still anywhere but James, "I am not too far from your profession." Mela carried her silence a while before she insecurely spoke up. "I'm no mind reader but I'm guessing you've got more than enough questions for me." Her eyes met his again with some courage. Until he spoke she thought of what he could possibly ask, but where would he even begin?

"Well, it wasn't by choice. All though, now I'm beginning doubt I could turn away from it." Now now, what would her profession be? If it wasn't that far from his, there was a slight possibility that she could join him. Lurking in the back of his mind was the fact that James's new she would never be coming with him. Mela had a life apart from his now, and he was just going to have to accept that. It was painful for him to just be here. So many questions he could be asking, but instead he chose to get right to the point. "Why am I here?" He asked with a cold, blank stare. It was all he could do to control himself from just grabbing her and passionately kissing those rosy lips.

Her eyes remained on him, nothing else really. "This may be kind of silly..." Mela recollected her thoughts once shattered as he entered, "but I sent that to you just so I can see you again. I'm afraid I've got myself deep into my.. 'business' and I may not be able to ever do what I've wanted." By this time, Mela thought, he must've been curios as to what this business was. "There is one thing that I might require of you-- well now that it's open." Her eyebrows knitted. "You wouldn't mind having another being on board your pirate "pilgrimage", now would you?" Maybe getting back into his life would actually benefit her. But Mela reminded herself not to get in too deep. It'd only jeopardize things. Like Before.

"Not at all," James replied, blurting it out too quickly. He couldn't appear desperate to have her back. Besides, he wasn't... He really was. Getting up, he kneeled down in front of her. Cupping Mela's cheeks, he looked up into her eyes. "You know I would let you join me without questions," As he spoke, his words were merely a faint whisper, "No matter what trouble you were in. You helped me in the past, and I will never be able to repay that." The instant his hands had gently touched her alabaster skin, James knew he had made a bad decision. Withdrawing his hands, he wouldn't let himself drown completely.

Mela absorbed the new happenings. After the years gone past, James still was the same. Affectionate and simple inside, but it tore her apart when she thought of their differences. Mela made the excuses in her mind but her heart told her they were the same, just in different situations. Whatever the case, she discarded her heart for the minute. "I'm glad I made such an impact." Then, she knew, she couldn't say her feelings. She could've still loved him, but would it be different? Dazing out of it, she saw his hands drawback. "Thanks." She could only say under her breath.

"I'm sorry," was all he could muster up. James was shocked by her response, even though he shouldn't have been. Sitting back down in his seat, he couldn't bring himself to look at Mela. Obviously, she didn't still love him. James would make the effort to just be friends and push back those feelings. A long time ago he had learned to ignore them. Recalling those months shortly after their relationship had crumbled, there hadn't been a night he didn't considering dropping everything to run back to her. Back then he would have considering begging, but he wouldn't beg. "Well, would you like the ship?" He asked quietly, forcing a slight smile. Earlier he had cleaned up some of the guest rooms, and his in case there was the chance she would be joining him... She was, and James was having troubles fathoming it.

"Don't be, old feelings never really die... we just dismiss them. They are always there." Mela hoped he'd understand that it was best for them to take this slow again. She tried not to depend on her old feelings so much. He might just be pretending, said her mind, but James never was one to fake these things. "Umm, the ship?" James's smile warmed her once pessimistic heart. "I hope it's big.. Do you by chance have a crew?" It didn't hurt to ask. Mela was a bit conscious of things, after all surprise wasn't something she fancied. "So now, James, a new beginning." Her smile turned up again with a nod of everlasting approval.

"Yes, a new beginning." He got up, leading her out of the room. "As for the ship, it's new and quite large.. As for the crew, it's just Jasi and I." He chuckled a bit, walking with her to the ship. James was proud that he was able to manage the ship on his own, and once in awhile with a little support from Jasi. When he had first become a pirate, he was on a crew. Back then he had a small position, for he was young, but he still disliked having so many people around. James had always been fond of isolation, which was why he wouldn't take on people. If he hadn't ran into Jasi that day when was in trouble, he would still be alone.

Mela exited the bar with James, she listened to him speak. He was more talkative at least, until he mentioned Jasi. "Jasi?" Her ears perked and her attention was set for about ten minutes. "Who is this 'Jasi'?" Mela glared at James. The nerve! Had it been that easy to get over someone like that, she'd have men to reject lining up around the block. Baffled and incredibly jealous, she impatiently waited for him to say something about this... female woman living on his ship. And without trying to seem attached, she emotionally asked, "What trouble are you causing the girl?" Threatening her was never a good idea. And of Course Jasi wouldn't make it long before she met Mela. She definitely had a lot to say to Jasi.

Oi. He didn't know Mela would have such a reaction, but she should have anticipated it. Trying not laugh, he answered her question. "Jasi is a girl I picked up a few years ago, she was in a bit of trouble. Don't worry, she's only 17. I look out for her. I'm sure you'll get to meet her later." James didn't realize that Mela was actually jealous of Jasi, it seemed impossible after their previous discussion. "So, let's go in," Entering the ship, James led Mela around. He showed her the controls, eating area, living room, and the extra bedrooms. There were other areas, but they weren't apart of the main living quarters.

Though James explained Jasi, Mela kept it in her mind. 17 was young, to be honest it was so young, Mela couldn't remember much about it. Again she dismissed her thoughts for another time, instead of pondering such thing she examined the ship. Her first thought of the ship, on the outside anyways, was it was some hard worker cash. She'd been in worse looking ones before. Good for James though, he'd made it this far. Mela knew all too well it was a hard lifestyle. "Hey James..?" Mela waited for his attention and when she failed she announced her question. " How'd you get into this horrid business?"

"Well, not by choice. I got picked up by a man, and from there I basically got sucked into the pirate life." He wasn't going to reveal many details, but found a rough outline suitable. "I greatly disliked having to work with a crew, and that's why I have the BB II." James smiled at her, pointing to the three open guest rooms. "You're welcome to pick whichever one. My room is just down the hall a bit...." Unsure of what else to do, he just stood there waiting. He hesitated to say something else, but then stopped. It would be so awkward to be around Mela again.

Mela poked around the rooms first, examining which one was bigger, which made less noise. She had popped in and out of each one about five times until she didn't come out of one. "This one." She saw the bed and watched it as if it was going to move. All that time, it took her only seconds to realize, she was back by James' side. Her dark eyes looked at it again and abruptly she turned around. "Thanks again. I don't know why you'd be so open to the idea, but I'm pleased you are." Her eye floated to the floor.

Hooking his finger under he chin, he lifted it up so that she was looking at him. "I'll see you later, Mela. Good night." He resisted kissing her, and instead headed to his room. He knew it would be a sleepless night tonight, and wondered if there would be many of those to come. Mela had just come back into his like a blazing comet roaring into earth; He was having issues dealing with this. Sighing, James prepared for bed.

--------------------

Allison hurried along the docks, hauling her guitar case along with her. She had to make sure she had everything so that she could ditch this town as soon as her conversation with Cloria was over. She stopped in front of Row 8, staring up at the old ship. The woman wasn't kidding; it really was a rust bucket. Grinning slightly, she climbed aboard, knocking on the door.

Cloria's head turned to the door as she heard a knocking sound. That must be Allison, she thought to herself as she stood and crossed the distance between the couch and the door. "Coming!" She called out, just before reaching the doorway. "Allison!" she said, once the door was open. "I'm glad you could stop by."

Allison waved vaguely with her free hand, trying to keep the strap of her bag from slipping off of her shoulder. She continued to grin as she nodded to the side, "This is quite a heap you've got here."

"It's Jin's," Cloria replied, "And I take no responsibility for the condition of the ship." She gestured to the couch. "I was about to make some coffee. Did you want something?"

Glancing around the room in quiet interest, Allison set her guitar case and bag on the floor and flopped onto the couch. She wouldn't say as much, but she could already tell that this was her kind of place. She shook her head, "No thanks. I'm not much of a coffee drinker."

Cloria smiled, "We don't have much else right now. We haven't caught a bounty in awhile." She headed into the kitchen to set the coffee machine, then returned to the living room. "So how is the guitar playing coming?" she asked.

Allison shrugged, idly fiddling with a whole in the arm of the couch, "Not so good. People haven't been too generous around here. I think I need to find another location. What about you? Why are you leaving Mars all of a sudden?"

"We got caught up with some people that we should probably avoid." Cloria said, her eyes glancing to Mei's room. "It's best if we leave." She turned back to Allison. "Where will you go?"

"Who knows?" she answered as a far-off look entered her eyes, "Wherever the wind takes me." A smile tugged on the corners of her mouth. "I make it a point never to plan too far ahead."

"Why don't you leave with us? I don't know where we're going, but we could always take you to the next place." Cloria offered. In the back of her mind she realized Jin was going to kill her for that.

Allison's far-off gaze seemed to return at these words, and she glanced at Cloria. "Well, I'm certainly not one to turn down a free ride," she replied, "but are you sure it's okay? You already said this isn't your ship... I don't want to get you in trouble."

Cloria looked away for a moment, "I'll be fine. I may not own the ship, but I take care of it enough to have claim. Besides, it'll be nice to have another female on the ship." Who isn't a backstabber.

She continued to watch Cloria for a moment, a gleam of curiosity in her eyes, before grinning. "Well, if you're sure... I don't know if I'll make very interesting company though. I'm not used to staying with a group of people. I'll try not to be too much trouble," she grinned, offering a wink.

Cloria simply smiled, "It's a trip enough staying here in the first place." She stood and headed into the kitchen to get herself a cup of coffee. "You'll fit right in." It was more than a trip at times, she thought to herself.

Allison looked at her surroundings as she leaned into the couch, folding her hands behind her head. With a smile, she said to herself, "Well, what do you know... It looks like my luck is changing."

--------------------

Vicious moaned softly as his eyes opened. He had no idea how long he'd been asleep, only that his last memory was Spike falling off the bridge. The light blinded him, and he couldn't see much. To ease the pain, he simply closed them again.

"Vicious."

The voice sounded like an angel, and Vicious smiled slowly. The voice was Julia's - she had come back to him. He slowly opened his eyes again, and as they adjusted to the light, her face came into view. "Julia," he said softly. It was obviously difficult for him to speak. "You came back."

"I'm here Vicious," Julia said. She sat on the edge of the bed and smiled down on him gently. "Did you sleep well?"

Vicious smiled back. "I don't remember. But no matter how the sleep was, waking up feels good." He tried to lift his left arm, but couldn't. "How bad am I?"

"Do you want the truth or something a bit more sugary?" Julia asked taking his left hand into her own.

Vicious closed his eyes for a moment, "From the amount of pain I'm in, I don't think the truth could hurt worse." He took a short breath, wincing as the pain racked his body. As Julia's hand touched his, he sighed softly, "But it's nothing, now that you're back."

Julia couldn't help but smile at him, but still every word he spoke chipped away at her heart. She didn't want to lie to him, but that was precisely what she was going to have to do. Did Faye realize that her plan would make her into a double agent?

"It's not nothing, Vicious," she said squeezing his hand tighter. In this moment she couldn't imagine him not being there. "You nearly died. ..Not to mention you don't quite look like your dashingly handsome self right now."

Vicious laughed softly, ignoring the tightening of his shoulder. "I would have welcomed death, Julia, had you not come back." He coughed, and fought off a dizzy spell. He was definitely in bad shape.

His words were piercing her like a knife. Why did he and Spike have to be so much a like? Closing her eyes she bent down and kissed him softly on the cheek. "Don't say things like that Vicious," Julia said softly into his ear.

He squeezed her hand. It was the best he could do. "I'm sorry, Julia." He closed his eyes, simply content for the moment that she was there. "I love you." he whispered. "I always have."

"I know Vicious," Julia said trying hard to fight back the tears that threatened to fall from her eyes. She kissed Vicious with the same lips she had used to kiss Spike just that morning. Julia knew this ruse was going to tear her apart, but she had to do it, for the both of them and for Faye and all their friends. "I love you too."

Vicious returned the kiss. Her lips, now only his, felt like heaven. This was happiness. This was what he had been willing to die for. "Forever?" He asked, opening his eyes to look into hers. For the first time in three years, they radiated happiness...

Julia pressed her cheek to his so that he couldn't see her face. She knew the heartbreak she was feeling would be reflected in her eyes. "Forever, Vicious," she said her voice cracking with emotions. She could feel the hot tears falling silently from her eyes and stood up again turning her back on Vicious so he couldn't see her cry.

"Something is wrong," Vicious said softly. "You love him still." Of course, Spike's death would have hit her hard. "Julia, it's over. It's behind us now. I wish you hadn't been hurt." He closed his eyes again, as another wave of dizziness washed over him. He didn't know how much longer he'd be awake.

Julia turned back to face him; quickly wiping at her eyes, but she couldn't stop them from flowing. "It's going to take some time to get use to this," Julia said trying to smile through her tears. "Please, just take it slow with me."

"I'm not going anywhere for awhile, Julia." Vicious replied. She would get over him, in time. "Please, kiss me one more time before I fall back to sleep."

Julia turned back to face him; quickly wiping at her eyes, but she couldn't stop them from flowing hotly down her face. "Its going to take some time to get use to this, to him being gone..." Julia said trying to smile through her tears. "Please, just handle me gently from now on."

The thought seemed funny to Vicious, although he didn't laugh. Of course, Julia was speaking about her heart. "We'll both have to handle each other gently. If you hug me too hard I might break." He lifted his right hand, and motioned for her to come back to his side. Life was going to be different now. She'd get used to it - as would he.

Julia felt like a small child obeying his summons and she came back to his side and gingerly curled up on the bed next to him resting her head against his shoulder. She wiped away the last of the hot tears from her face and tried to relax in the warmth of Vicious's arms. But still images of tending to Spike kept filling her head and her heart felt more torn then it had ever had before.

"Are you happy now, Vicious?" Julia asked. She couldn't help herself, she couldn't handle this unless she knew they were both happy.

Vicious placed his right arm softly over Julia's back. "Yes, Julia. I feel happy. I think it's the first time in three years I've felt truly happy." He ran his fingers slowly through her soft blonde hair, enjoying just being with her. "And I will make you happy again, Julia." He closed his eyes again and relaxed. He was so tired, but he wanted to stay with her as long as he could. "Are you going to be here when I wake up?"

Julia closed her eyes taking in the smell of him. The arm on her back felt so right, but still she couldn't help but feel guilt wash over her with every word he said. She knew she was going to fail Faye, the woman had come up with a brilliant plan to keep them apart, but Julia wasn't going to be able to handle playing both of them like this...not for long anyway. "I don't know Vicious," Julia said twirling a lock of his silver hair in her fingers. "I...I will stay here until you fall asleep."

Vicious sighed softly. It was not the answer he had wanted, but he supposed it was the best she could give. "I love you," he said softly, before drifting off to sleep.

Julia sighed and kissed him gently. "I love you too," she whispered before standing up and walking across to the door. She stopped to turn off the lights and gave one last look at his sleeping form. "I only hope you will be able to forgive me."

--------------------

Graphical Scene warning!!!

Jin felt like shit, there was just no other way to describe it. He had just left Rua in the basement of a syndicate. She was helpless there. The girl had never really been involved in more than a bar fight, and even then Jin had been there to step in if it had become too dangerous for her. He couldn't imagine what she had felt alone and bleeding amidst all the gun fire and shouting in the basement.

And then there was Cloria, who he was holding in his arms. The girl he had chosen as a girlfriend over Rua, and then had chosen to take to safety instead of Rua. He loved her still, but there was something missing from his heart now.

Sniffing he wiped at a single tear before Cloria could see it, he didn't want her to know how much Rua meant to him. He didn't want her to think he regretted choosing her. "I'm glad your here with me," he said holding her even tighter against him.

Cloria smiled. He wasn't saying everything on his mind, but she realized that there were things he needed to keep private. This entire ordeal had been too much for them to handle. If she could go back, she would have kept the SeaDog out of it. "Jin, I'll always be here with you," she said softly, leaning into his chest.

"We'll leave Mars as soon as possible," he said taking a deep breath and resolving to do his best to put it all behind him. "I'm going to have to go to Valhalla, tell them what happened. I...I'm not sure how I'm going to be able to break the news to them. First I left and then I got their lead singer killed."

Cloria looked up at Jin, "Look, you don't know for sure that she's dead. Vicious ordered them to keep the women alive, and there's a chance that she made it. Hope for the best Jin." Would she be such a terrible person if she didn't? Cloria looked away for a moment as the dark thought crossed her mind. No, she loved Jin, and he'd be happier if Rua was alive. At least, she tried to convince herself of that.

"I will," he said kissing the top of her head. "Thank you, Clory. If you weren't here for me, I don't know what I would do right now."

Cloria reached up a hand and touched Jin's cheek. What else could she say to him? She certainly couldn't change the situation. "I'll always be here for you Jin."

Jin didn't need words right now, he needed feelings, and he needed the physicality of the solid world. His hand traveled up her neck and into her hair as he held her for a kiss. He needed to feel her, taste her, just to reassure himself that she was real. Jin was swept up by a tide of emotions and he only knew one way to release. "I need you Clory," he whispered into her ear before he began to trail kisses down her neck.

Cloria kissed him back, forcing herself not to tense up. He needed her, and now was not the time to think about the past. She ran a hand through his hair, pulling his head closer to hers as she kissed him.

Jin loved the feel of her against his hands and on his tongue. She was beautiful and in this moment she was all his. With one hand he supported her head while the other roamed up her leg and under her shirt. He had completely forgotten his earlier promise to her, his mind was set only on releasing all the pent up emotions that threatened to make him burst. "I love e you Clory."

"I Love you too, Jin," Cloria replied, pulling back for a moment. She took his hand and smiled, hoping he would slow down, even though she couldn't bring herself to say it. No, she told herself. She needed to be ready for him. "Why don't we go somewhere more comfortable than the hallway?" she suggested, hoping the idea would cover her sudden discomfort.

Jin laughed, her words had woken him up from his trance and he suddenly realized the humor of the situation. He couldn't have the poor girl in the hallway of the ship where anyone could walk in on them. Not only had he lost his mind, he'd lost any claim to logic he had once had. Standing up he pulled Cloria up after him, readjusting her shirt and giving her a quick kiss on the lips. He had sobered up now, and he couldn't mistake the frightened mouse look in her eyes. "Its okay Clory," he said holding her tight against him. His manhood was already becoming hard, but he couldn't take her when she seemed so frightened. "I...I don't want to force you."

Cloria smiled. He seemed to understand what she had wanted without her truly asking. "You're not forcing me Jin." She said, wrapping her arms around his neck. "Carry me into the bedroom. Please?" She wanted to hold him, if nothing else.

Jin smiled, he couldn't be any happier with what she had said to him. Despite his injured arm, he still managed to pick her up easily. He made his way to his room, carrying her ceremoniously across the threshold and kicking the door shot with the hell of his boot. Playfully he dropped her onto the bed so that she bounced a bit before settling into the mattress. "Are you sure?" he asked smiling down at her. "Because once we start I can't promise I'll be able to stop myself Princess."

Cloria laughed as Jin picked her up and carried her into the room. She let herself forget everything else - she wanted to enjoy her time with him. Her smile faded slightly at his words, and for a moment, she swallowed hard. "I trust you, Jin,"

Then the smile returned. "I trust you, Jin," she said softly. She did trust him, and this would prove it - both to him and to herself.

That was all he needed to here. Kicking off his boots he walked around to the foot of the bed to pull off her shoes as well. Smiling wickedly down on her he kissed her toe, and then began to tickle the sensitive arch of her foot with his fingers. He would take this as slow as his body would allow him, but first he needed to make sure she felt at ease.

Cloria laughed. She was ticklish, and her feet were sensitive. "Jin! Please!" she laughed, "Come up here." She wanted to kiss him again. Already, his smile put her at ease. "Kiss me ok."

"Kiss you?" he asked feigning ignorance. "Here?" he asked kissing her ankle. "Or maybe here," he said inching up her leg with tiny kisses. "You are going to have to be a bit more specific."

She laughed again, "Oh come on Jin, you know what I mean," She sat up, and grabbed his shirt, pulling him down on top of her. "Here," she said, pressing her lips against his.

Jin had never loved her more than in this moment. Her body felt so good under his, he couldn't imagine it being any other way. His tongue explored her mouth, tasted her, he wanted to know every inch of her. He sat up again, quickly pulling off his shirt he leaned down again but this time instead of kissing her mouth he pulled her shirt up a few inches to kiss the sensitive flesh of her belly button. "You have an innie," he said mischievously before letting his tongue delved into its depth.

Cloria kissed him back with the same passion as he. She felt right with him, and suddenly, as though lightening had struck, she relaxed and gave in to him. She watched silently as he took off his shirt, and giggled as he touched her belly button. He was everything that she wanted, and more.

She closed her eyes as his tongue found her again. "Jin," she whispered. Yes, she could do this.

"Yes?" he questioned as he trailed a line of kisses up belly, inching her shirt up slowly as he did so. Her skin was soft and perfect under his hands, and the more he touched her the more he couldn't seem to touch her enough.

"I love you," Cloria replied, her hands reaching to touch his head. She wanted to feel him, and be with him, and love him all at the same time, and yet she had no idea what she was doing.

"You're beautiful, princess," he said, his hand snaked around her back and unclipped her bra. Drawing her up he pulled her shirt off the rest of the way and quickly tossed the bra away after that. "I want to have all of you."

Cloria wrapped her arms around his neck. "And I want to be yours," she said softly, as her bare skin pressed against his. She closed her eyes and leaned her head back to kiss him again. To think she had been scared of this?

Jin kissed her back, it was becoming harder and harder to take his time, but it was her first time and he wanted it to be perfect for her. Their lips still intertwined he held onto her and rolled that so she was on top of him. "You're turn," he said giving her a playful grin.

Cloria froze, "My what?" she said looking down at Jin. She had no idea what to do. She hadn't done anything with a man since Kael, and back then, she had been more than careful. Well, not always. A small grin crossed her lips. "Alright," she said softly, kissing his neck.

Jin couldn't help himself, he laughed at the dumbfounded look she had just given him. He didn't want her just be a passive lump in the bed like some women were, he wanted her to feel she had power over the situation so that they could enjoy it together. That is...if she didn't tease him too much.

Cloria kissed his chest, and moved slowly down towards his belly button. Her breasts brushed lightly against his skin as she moved, a feeling she realized she enjoyed as well. She circled his belly button with her tongue, then kissed her way back to his mouth. "How does that feel?" she asked, as though she needed reassurance.

Jin could feel his muscles contract at her touch. The girl was intoxicating, and she didn't know how much her fairy kisses had affected him. "You're wonderful princess," he said hoarsely as he ran a hand through her hair. He had made a promise with himself to let her experiment, but still every inch of his body urged him to lay her down and take her at this moment.

Cloria simply smiled down at him. "I love it when you call me that," she said, her voice melodic. She was vibrantly happy, and it showed in both her facial expression and the tone of her voice. "I love everything about you Jin."

He pulled her down for a kiss, blissfully happy with the way things had turned out between them. "Then show me princess," he wasn't about to let her off the hook yet.

Cloria bit her lip, "I don't know how Jin," she said softly, sitting up on top of him.

"Then don't think about it," he said teasingly brushing her taut nipples. "Just do what you feel is right."

Cloria leaned down and kissed him again, "Please Jin." She said softly. "This is... my first time." Maybe he hadn't realized that? She didn't know. Already, she was feeling ready to bolt, and she didn't want to do that to him.

"I understand." He held her in his arms again, laying her gently back down on the bed so they were side by side. He let his hands roam down her side and took one of her beasts into her mouth suckling it gently, and circling the nipple with his tongue.

Cloria breathed a small sigh of relief as Jin took back over. It has always been that way in the past, and she wasn't comfortable enough yet to change it. She moaned softly as her touched her, in places she hadn't been touched in a long time. "Thank you," she whispered under her breathe.

Jin could feel her body tensing and relaxing with his touches, and it made him happy to see that she was affected by him as he was of her. He trailed kisses back down and his hands unbuttoned her pants he tugged them off inch my inch. He let his hands play over the silken smooth skin of her thighs kissing them gently. He looked back down into her eyes, "This is your last chance to stop."

Cloria shook her head, "There isn't anyone else I want to share this with." Her eyes shone with trust, but nervousness and fear glinted as well. She had heard stories of 'first times'. She could only trust that Jin would be gentle with her.

Nodding he pulled off her underwear, and laid back down beside her. Kissing her, his hand crept up her thigh to massage her womanhood. His finger slipped inside her, exploring, mimicking the movement of his tongue within her mouth.

Cloria moaned softly, and kissed Jin back, letting her own tongue touch his. She was aroused, curious, and scared at the same time, and all three emotions could be discerned - sometimes she pressed forward, other times she held back. But the one thing she knew to be constant was that she wanted him.

Jin couldn't hold back anymore. Pulling back from her for only a moment he wriggled out of the last of his clothing. He held Cloria close to her so that she could feel his erection, he didn't want her to be scared, but he knew the pain of the first time was inevitable. "I love you Clory."

"I love you too," came the reply, followed by eyes filled with love. "I trust you, ok." Then Cloria closed her eyes, as though it would be easier for her that way.

Jin lay on top of her balancing his weight on his elbows on either side of her. "Wrap your legs around me," he instructed her. "I'll try to be gentle, but I won't lie, its probably going to hurt a lot."

Cloria did as she was told, bringing her legs up to wrap around Jin's body. She looked him in the eyes, "Jin, it's ok. Please, don't worry about me." Cloria's voice didn't portray the confidence she was going for, and she knew that Jin would be careful, no matter what she said.

"I love you princess," before the words were barely out of his mouth he kissed her and thrust into her at the same time.

Cloria's eyes widened as the first penetration sent a racking pain through her body. She hadn't been completely ready, and her nervousness caused her to tense up. She forced on a smile, and kissed Jin back to try and hide her initial shock. She didn't want him to freak out or worry about her.

Jin held himself completely still so that she could adjust to having him inside her. "I'm sorry princess," he said kissing her forehead softly. "I promise it won't hurt ever again."

Cloria's forced smile remained. "It doesn't hurt," she lied.

Jin couldn't help it he laughed at the way she was valiantly trying to be brave. "You don't have to lie to me princess," he said running his hand through her silky hair. Jin had had about all the lying around his control could take. "I promise you'll enjoy it from here."

With that Jin started to slowly move within her, pulling away so that he was almost fully out of her and then slowly thrusting back in again. He gained his rhythm, seeming to fit perfectly inside her. "Clory."

Cloria tried to relax, but she couldn't. It still hurt, but she simply closed her eyes. Even the pain was a new sensation, and she wanted to try and enjoy it as best she could. Jin seemed so into the motions, that she rocked her own hips to try and match his.

Jin tried to match their rhythms, the feel of her was intoxicating and Jin could feel himself nearing his climax. Kissing her again he felt his release come and shuddered with the power of it. He practically collapsed upon her breathing heavily. He had tried to help her reach her own climax, but she hadn't been ready yet. Jin squeezed his eyes shut feeling like he had failed her. "I love you princess."

"I love you too," Cloria whispered softly, wrapping her arms around him. This part, this feeling of him inside her now that it was over, felt good. She just wanted to stay like this.

Jin shifted his weight so he wouldn't crush her. He felt satiated, and ready to face what the world had to throw at him now that he had Cloria. "Sweet dreams beautiful," Jin said closing his eyes and drifting softly into a deep sleep.