I woke up to the smell of hospital air, feeling very much refreshed and so very much stronger. I heard Joseph snoring beside my bed. I knew it was him because he snores so loudly. When we first slept in the same bed (our wedding night), I lay awake in his arms just listening to the horrible noise and giggling. Snoring always amused me. Rupert was a snorer, but he wasn't anywhere near as loud as Joseph. It feels nice to hear snoring when I'm trying to sleep because it makes me feel that I'm not alone. It gives me a sense of security and not just because security is Joseph's specialty.

Anyway, I felt around for him and he slowly woke up moaning.

"Mmm? Clarisse! Oh, darling, I'm so happy you're finally awake! How are you feeling?"

"I'm good, thankyou, really good."

He leaned over and cuddled me saying, "I'm so glad you're okay, I was so worried."

"Why would you be worried?"

"You've been in a coma for two days. Nobody could wake you. I'm so happy you're alright."

"A coma? That's rubbish, I passed out!"

"People who pass out can be woken. You my dear, would not wake."

"Joseph, I honestly passed out. If you remember, I hadn't slept in three days, nor had I eaten. I was very tired and very weak, so I drank and I passed out. Now here I am refreshed and healthy."

"So you're not upset anymore?"

"No. I feel really good."

"That would be the anti-depressants."

"Anti-depressants?"

"Yes. You need to take them every day now."

"Just like last time…"

I started growing sad again when I thought about how upset I was when Rupert died. He was a real friend to me and we'd grown so close over the years. Then my son died, that was even worse and in such a short time. You know I'm the only person in the whole world who thinks they were assassinated? It was just far too coincidental to be an accident. I can't believe someone would actually kill two of the only five people I ever loved. I certainly hope they don't go for Mia. She means the world to me and I couldn't bear losing her. I have no idea what the killers achieved by killing my husband and son. They didn't end up on the throne and I'm sure they wouldn't have gotten any money for it. So why did they take their lives? It's a wonder they didn't come after me. Mind you, I thought they were going to. I was so afraid to go outdoors after Philippe died. I stayed inside all the time because I feared for my life. The only person I would go outside with was Joseph. He made me feel really safe, especially when he'd wait until he thought nobody was looking and he'd kiss me so nicely and so softly. He really was quite the romantic one back then. I loved every second of it. The only reason I turned him down was because I knew how much romance deteriorates after marriage. We're living proof of that, but if I didn't marry him, he would have gone and I'd have been left with nothing. Anyway, enough about that.

I asked Joseph, "Is Mia around? I need to talk to her."

"Oh?"

"I never apologized for ruining her wedding."

"She's on her honeymoon."

"Oh, of course."

"Can I get you something to eat? A drink?"

"Thankyou for asking, but I can get it myself."

"The doctor said you need to stay in bed."

"Why? I'm fine."

"No, you're not fine. You have to stay in bed."

"I don't take orders from you."

"You do when it involves your health, safety or wellbeing and this involves all three."

"Oh, tosh."

I tried to get up, but my back suddenly gave way. I screamed. The pain was so hard and it felt as if somebody had stabbed me in the back.

"I told you to stay where you were. The driver said he accidentally dropped when he was carrying you into the palace."

I was still sort of screaming; it was more like complaining though, "The clumsy fool. I'd like to thank him."

"For dropping you?"

"Ahh, no, silly, for carrying me to safety."

"Would you please stop screaming, it sounds as if you're in labour!"

"Well I am in about as much pain as when I was having Pierre!"

He started rubbing my back and the pain started to disappear.

"Oh, that's better. Mmm…"

"Is there anything I can get you to make you feel more comfortable?"

"Well, since I'm going to be stuck here, you may as well get me a magazine to read."

"You can't read magazines."

"And that's why you're going to sit here and read it to me."

"Alright, I'll be back."

I waited for him for seven minutes according to my talking watch.

"Motor Monthly or Genovian Express?"

"Couldn't you find this months issue of Woman's World?"

"Umm…no…they were…uh…all out."

I thought that sounded like a lie.

"Are you sure they don't have it?"

"Umm…yes?"

"I don't believe you."

"There were none there!"

"Go and get it now!"

I heard him slap the wall (which is something he does whenever he's annoyed with me), and then he cursed something that sounded like, "Damn women magazines," only I cleaned it up a little. He can be so stubborn sometimes. I don't know why he can't grasp the fact that I am no longer able to read the magazines I want to read and that I require someone to read them for me.

Around half an hour later, he came back. At first I thought he was trying to relieve his anger by avoiding me like he usual does, but that's not at all what he was doing. He told me he came across some brochures in the lobby and thought I might be interested in them. I thought he was just saying that so he didn't have to read Woman's World, but then he started reading one out aloud.

"The E34 reading machine can read any text ranging from documents to books. It has an amazing…"

"A reading machine?"

"Yeah, they read text for you."

"I've never heard of a reading machine before."

"Neither had I."

"I want one! Go and buy me one!"

"You can't just walk into a store and buy one, you have to order it. But let me tell you, they aren't cheap."

"Oh? How much do they cost?"

"Anywhere from three to six thousand."

"Expensive? Ha! I have more than enough retirement money to buy one of those."

"So should I fill out a form then?"

"By all means."

I can't wait for that machine to arrive. Joseph's excited about it too because he won't have to read for me anymore. And I get to listen to my diary without anybody else hearing it, in a private room with the volume turned way down.

I like being happy again.